[P2TM Chat] The Restaurant at the End of the Multiverse II

[Lavan Tiri]

According to the wiki I found on it, Earth has 20 billion people and deforestation everywhere. Corporations aren't running everything. The Moon and Mars are colonised, and algae is the staple food. There's an energy crisis and they need Unobtanium as a cheap superconductor. And the oh so heroic main characters of Avatar give their race the middle finger and send them packing so they can go run around naked in the trees while everyone else suffers.

Exactly why I was rooting for the humans the whole time.

Unobtainium basically makes fusion power viable, which people need in order to get to different systems and colonize them and relieve population pressures in the Solar System. Small wonder the RDA is willing to sacrifice aliens and billions of trees for that cause.

*thinks we're talking about The Last Airbender*

I hated the movie too! Seriously, fuck M. Night Shymalan, and his whole fucking family.

[G-Tech Corporation]

Exactly why I was rooting for the humans the whole time.

Unobtainium basically makes fusion power viable, which people need in order to get to different systems and colonize them and relieve population pressures in the Solar System. Small wonder the RDA is willing to sacrifice aliens and billions of trees for that cause.

*thinks we're talking about The Last Airbender*

I hated the movie too! Seriously, fuck M. Night Shymalan, and his whole fucking family.

It is a bit of a pity how we'll never see any more movies due to how seriously he twatted up the first one. Kinda like Eragon. I enjoyed the books when I read them, but the movie was just so bad.

[Lavan Tiri]

*thinks we're talking about The Last Airbender*

I hated the movie too! Seriously, fuck M. Night Shymalan, and his whole fucking family.

It is a bit of a pity how we'll never see any more movies due to how seriously he twatted up the first one. Kinda like Eragon. I enjoyed the books when I read them, but the movie was just so bad.

I don't want to see any more movies of that.

And Eragon was a great movie, because it was such a spectacular ham and cheese sandwich.

[G-Tech Corporation]

It is a bit of a pity how we'll never see any more movies due to how seriously he twatted up the first one. Kinda like Eragon. I enjoyed the books when I read them, but the movie was just so bad.

I don't want to see any more movies of that.

And Eragon was a great movie, because it was such a spectacular ham and cheese sandwich.

But I wanted another LotR.

Not another Spaceballs.

[Constaniana]

Exactly why I was rooting for the humans the whole time.

Unobtainium basically makes fusion power viable, which people need in order to get to different systems and colonize them and relieve population pressures in the Solar System. Small wonder the RDA is willing to sacrifice aliens and billions of trees for that cause.

I rooted for the humans because they were actually interesting characters.

That, and they had the cooler equipment.

[Lavan Tiri]

I don't want to see any more movies of that.

And Eragon was a great movie, because it was such a spectacular ham and cheese sandwich.

But I wanted another LotR.

Not another Spaceballs.

True, but really, the books aren't so great either. At least, I didn't think so when I reread them, with TVTropes at my side.

[G-Tech Corporation]

I rooted for the humans because they were actually interesting characters.

That, and they had the cooler equipment.

Honestly, the lover of military tech in me adored the Dragon gunship.

It's so sadly impractical, but so cool.

But I wanted another LotR.

Not another Spaceballs.

True, but really, the books aren't so great either. At least, I didn't think so when I reread them, with TVTropes at my side.

Oh yes, they weren't any Epic of Gilgamesh or Tolkien. But they opened a fascinating world to me, despite how badly that world was used after the first novel.

[Nude East Ireland]

I remember liking some of the concepts that the movie never addressed. I think Earth in that world is a polluted, corporate mess where people have to wear gas masks outside. That's interesting, I suppose.

Yeah, Avatar's world is pretty cool. I enjoyed the video game far more than the movie.

I played that game too. I remember liking it.

I remember liking some of the concepts that the movie never addressed. I think Earth in that world is a polluted, corporate mess where people have to wear gas masks outside. That's interesting, I suppose.

According to the wiki I found on it, Earth has 20 billion people and deforestation everywhere. Corporations aren't running everything. The Moon and Mars are colonised, and algae is the staple food. There's an energy crisis and they need Unobtanium as a cheap superconductor. And the oh so heroic main characters of Avatar give their race the middle finger and send them packing so they can go run around naked in the trees while everyone else suffers.

That sounds awesome.

The problem is that the main characters are idiots.

[Zeinbrad]

Yeah, Avatar's world is pretty cool. I enjoyed the video game far more than the movie.

I played that game too. I remember liking it.

According to the wiki I found on it, Earth has 20 billion people and deforestation everywhere. Corporations aren't running everything. The Moon and Mars are colonised, and algae is the staple food. There's an energy crisis and they need Unobtanium as a cheap superconductor. And the oh so heroic main characters of Avatar give their race the middle finger and send them packing so they can go run around naked in the trees while everyone else suffers.

That sounds awesome.

The problem is that the main characters are idiots.

"Sir, we have gas masks, why don't we just make a chemical weapon that only harms them then fire it into their camps?"

"Because, how would we have a plot if the heroes are dead?"

[Agritum]

Say, friends, would you be interested in more short stories like this one?

[The Templar High Council]

Say, friends, would you be interested in more short stories like this one?

Short stories are always nice.

[G-Tech Corporation]

Also, Total War: Warhammer looks damn sexy.

Karl Franz has my sword.

[Nude East Ireland]

Also, Total War: Warhammer looks damn sexy.

Karl Franz has my sword.

Why pledge your sword to a false ruler, when you could instead join the forces of the rightful King of Westeros, Stannis Baratheon.

[Zeinbrad]

I'm really, really fucking glad that the Avatar fandom died just as quickly as it was born and that, six years after the film first came out, the only thing people remember about it is the whole Pocahontas ripoff thing, and Miles Quarritch's lines.

My favorite fanwork.

[Wolfenium]

Say, friends, would you be interested in more short stories like this one?

Short stories are always nice.

Yeah. I'm just worried about where to post them on NS.

[Alleniana]

Say, friends, would you be interested in more short stories like this one?

Short stories are always nice.

^

[Wolfenium]

Oh ya, that reminds me. I wrote a short story myself some time ago, but I only ever posted it on the Alternate History. Here is.

The Last of Goguryeo

No one expected it coming. Most would have mistaken it for a off-day Tom Clancy novel or a comedy (South) Korean drama. When the top brass of the Korean People's Army finally lost their patience with the rogue Kim Jong-Un and removed him, most watched for a total implosion. But while many in the capital spoke with indignity, the army's strength proved decisive as ever. In the end, the accursed portrait of Kim-Il Sung was toppled at Kumsusan Palace, as an unlikely survivor took to the helm of the reborn North Korea.

"The era of darkness has come to an end," announced a miraculously alive Jang Sung-taek atop the Grand People's Study House, one of the young Kim's purge victims, "for too long, the toxic grip of the Kim dynasty has silenced us, forcing us to bend our knees like slaves while our children rot in the fields! Those who are steadfast to the nation are unjustly killed, while our paranoid leaders feasted like tyrants! But no more! I alone stand as a witness, to the trial of not just one dictator, but to three generations of dictators! The Kims mark three generations for punishment for one man's mistake. The time has now come for the free Korean people to do the same!"

For a moment, the world applauded the victory with caution and dread. The West hoped that the execution of the dictator would usher democracy and eventual unification to the nation, while the Chinese were satisfied with the replacement of an errant vassal. But none but the top brass knew the truth behind the miracle, as a shadow now resided in the old 'palace of the people'.

Pacing into the dimly lit mausoleum, the nervous junta leaders could feel their former bravado at the square melting away at the sight of the reconstruction inside. Everywhere, symbols of the old founder were stacked in messy piles, carted from its halls ready to be destroyed and scrapped. Already, Kim Il-Sung's own body had been exhumed and cremated, with half his ashes sent to Seoul to await judgement by the South Korean people. The other part faced a more grisly fate, fired into the Yellow Sea by artillery fire on live television as 'punishment' for his crimes against the Korean people. While in line with the macabre black comedy that was North Korean media, the move was arranged as part of the junta's attempts to reconcile with the world. However, sanctions showed no signs of abating at all, not the least with its suspended nuclear program. However, worse things awaited the officials as they stepped into the former mausoleum hall. Despite what the world believes, the junta, in fact, were puppets for a much darker force.

Cowed amidst ranks of imposing black figures as they arrived down the hall, the leaders of the reconstituted government could only bend the knee, sweatdrops lining his forehead like glistening beads as he tried to hold his nerves. The strange guards holding vigilant along the room walls were faceless under their balaclava masks, their black kevlar uniforms reminiscent of Hollywood-style special operations operatives. Had he not known who led them, he might have mistaken it for a Western or Chinese coup, or the work of mercenaries. But the gaudy halberd-like bayonets sticking from their black furnished M82s spoke of something else, a level bordering on the fantasical and absurd.

Peering before where the statue of the founder once stood, the hapless ex-vice-chairman, now chairman of the committee, dared not look directly. The entire mausoleum display had been transformed into a throne room, with the country's new leader now seated like a monarch before the coup plotters. Before, he might have scoffed at the thought of a restored monarchy in place of a de facto one. But now, with his life tied in debt to his new liege, he was starting to feel that reality was just a formality away, and a dangerous precedent for the quasi-communist state.

“Please... you have to understand, my liege...” he tried to explain to the figure before him, struggling to restrain his stammering as his fellow conspirators, clad in their best uniforms, looked on with apprehension and fear, “the people need time... they are hungry... confused... If I simply announce the restoration now, there will be riots in the streets. The surrounding powers will intervene... and then what would become of your kingdom then?”

Seated crosslegged on a gilded marble throne, the shadowy character appeared no larger than an average high school student. The outline of a feminine body barely visible under the dim lighting, the mastermind did not look nearly as threatening as her minions protecting her. Even the guard captain stationed right beside proved a more intimidating presence, a pair of glowing gold eyes bearing down on the hapless plotters. However, it was not just her goons that Jang was worried about. He had seen firsthand what she was capable of, if only a little bit of it. He deigned to think that she was even less human than that, though the truth would probably only be known at his final moments.

“You question my ability to rule, Chairman,” the girl answered in a chilling, sterile tone, “I understand that change had to be taken slowly, but I'm not a woman content with hiding. What king commands his people when his own name is not known to the masses?”

“But to restore Your Majesty to power now is to invite disaster,” blabbed the chairman in panic, “pardon if your subject is rude, but as grand as your power may be, what can compare to weapons that can erase cities in a fireball in a split second? What can match a sea of armies when all you command are half-starved skeletons? Besides, the people of Korea had long lived under the illusion of a peasant-led realm. Even the Kims did not crown themselves officially. They will revolt!”

Buttoning up her lower lip, the lady appeared terse, even angered by his words. While her restraint was apparent as her posture remained unchanged, the frightened officials could tell she was mad. But for them to simply call for a return of a monarchy would be utter madness. The Korean people had lived under the auspices of Juche for too long. To bring back a hated symbol of imperialism was to invite death, not only from the masses, but the major powers as well. The man had only narrowly escaped death from the paranoid young slob. He was not about to be brought to the Hague, Seoul or Beijing to be tried for war crimes, much less buried under bombs.

“Isn't that what the army is for,” she quipped in agitation, her temper starting to show over the comments, “your kind is already used to repression through force of arms. Surely you wouldn't care for more heads on the roads.”

“But we've promised a better rule to the foreign powers already,” blustered the panicking official, “if we show ourselves to be no different from the bloodthirsty Kims, the Americans and Chinese will not hesitate to intervene! We'll be destroyed-”

“Are you telling me I am not capable of controlling these rabble, that I should fear them,” the girl suddenly hissed in anger, her voice echoing in the room as she lifted herself off the throne for a moment. Had the shadow not obscured her face, the officials would have easily tell that she was fuming. While the tirade might have came across as a simple tantrum, there was a distinctly ominous ring in her voice that spelt of a supernatural horror. Whoever this so-called-pretender was, she was not a mere girl that could simply be dismissed.

Unexpectedly, a voice of reason finally came from the woman's ranks, as the guard captain patted his hand on her own while it grasped tightly on the throne arm. A closer look as his head sank under the dim ceiling light revealed more, a young man with a head of platinum blonde, almost pure white hair. But the most striking feature was a pair of black sclera and gold irises in place of his eyes. Their freakish appearance was matched only by his arms, his exposed shoulders and hand revealing not pale peach skin, but dim grey metal.

“You must calm down, my liege,” he spoke to her in a stern, professional voice, “difficult as it may, he speaks sense. The people of this land cannot yet understand or embrace a stranger as a leader, much less a queen. Besides, any undue bloodshed will generate further resentment against you. Your powers are many and fearsome, but even sheer weight of numbers alone can bring your demise. You must give the officials time to restore the richness of the land first. Only then, when the people understand the benevolence of your rule, may you be able to take your place as rightful liege. Who knows,” he embellished his words, his phrasing spoken like a true noble, “perhaps the people of Silla might join you as well.”

Silla... a name spoken only in history classes and lectures; one of the three kingdoms of Korea alongside Goguryeo and Baekje. Any onlooker who might have heard it would have easily drawn a blank at the reference. Indeed, there were some in the junta officials who felt confused at the words. But for those who could deduce it, like Jang, it could only refer to the Republic of Korea. Under the leadership of Park Geum-Hye's vapid anti-North government, he doubted a unification under them, even with force, could ever be the case. After all, circumstances had seen North Korea's fortunes nosedive into oblivious, while its southern adversary rose to become an economic powerhouse that threatened to, and perhaps succeeded, in pulling its only ally to its side through mutual capitalist interests. In contrast, the Kims remained stubborn against any notion of accepting the Chinese example of state capitalist-style 'socialism'. The dangers of information spilling into their personal fiefdom were too great, and yet now they were planning to open the valves.

“F... Fine...” she finally admitted, hesitantly lowering herself on her throne as she tried to regain some semblance of regal formality, “if you consider it necessary, so be it... I shall be patient... After all... I am... kind. I must show them my love rather than force them to accept me. But,” she stated firmly to the officials, “my patience has limits, ministers. I do not wish to wait till my hair is white and dry before I take my crown. You have until the hills regain its green to reform the nation. By that time, I intend to have my subjects welcome me as their rightful sovereign. Unless, you fear stepping aside for your liege.”

“O-Of couse not, Your Majesty,” yelped Jang in panicked assurance, “the people of Korea yearns for your arrival, my queen! Who are we mere mortals to jealously hold on to what was delegated to us by your wisdom! Rest assured, we will convince them of your just guidance in time! We thank your for your boundless understanding! Uhm... Long live the Queen!”

As if on cue, cries of blessings soon rang the hall like church bells, the hails underlined by a rehearsed monotony and abject fear. From the onset, the hails seem almost believable, but as the queen knew from her earlier correspondence, it was only the legacy of repression and theatrical worshipping under the Kims' rule that made it possible, almost as if the officials were actively willing themselves to believe their own lies in a heartbeat. A wry, amused smile on her face, she could only muse at the hypocrisy of the whole affair, their loyalties bound only by the fact that she was even more untouchable than Kim Il-Sung and his descendants. A normal human in her position would have every reason to fear assassination, but she herself had no worries about it. As she stood to raise her hand to halt the farcical rejoicing, she finally stepped to the fore. Under the limelight was her seemingly innocent facade was cast in full, a brunette, long haired schoolgirl draped in a simple red scarf, her dull black eyes laid down upon the hapless clowns with pitiless indifference.

“Humans never cease to amuse me, Neugdae (Korean: 늑대),” she chimed in a whisper to her captain as she clasped her hands together in childish glee, “if I've known the mortals here are this weak, I would have come here a long time ago.”

“I would caution against overconfidence, mistress,” stated the captain, dropping his volume low enough to keep them from the officials' ears,“we know too little about this realm to be sure there is no one capable of besting you. Besides which, if we are able to come here, who is to stop your enemies from doing the same? Remember, you are not queen of anyone... yet.”

Pouting playfully at the stern lad, the girl gave a cheeky smile as she suddenly edged close to his face. Running a finger over his forehead as she combed aside a fringe, she chimed to the stoic guardians, “that's why I have you, don't I? So long as you're here, who can hope to touch me?”

“Besides, by the time Damdeok[1]'s attack dogs come, Gorguyeo... this Gorguyeo would have already become mine to will,” she mused with a devious, fox-like grin on her face, “and I didn't even need to do much. I should thank these gout-afflicted despots for making my job so easy. After all, what greater monsters exist in any world than humanity itself~...”

The miracle of Korea was to become a curse in disguise. Darkness had long been cast over the northern lands, but the night had now blinded its moon and stars. The despots of the old communist regime may be removed, but at what cost will Korea pay to its new leader, as she seeks to emerge from the shadows to claim her crown...

[1] - King Gwanggaeto the Great of Gorguyeo

Oh hindsight, Ougi might have played the villain better, but they're a suspected trap. :V

[Alleniana]

not enough sternly worded letters from the UN 3/10
I like it

[Wolfenium]

not enough sternly worded letters from the UN 3/10
I like it

Never enough stronkly worded letters.

[Nightkill the Emperor]

viewtopic.php?p=26520793#p26520793

Jon's farewell.

[Alleniana]

https://forum.nationstates.net/viewtopic.php?p=26520793#p26520793

Jon's farewell.

...
Bye, have fun in the "real world".

[The Grey Wolf]

but I can say it has been influential in my person to a degree which is, frankly, disturbing.

Glad to know that I'm not the only one.

[Grenartia]

Our whole region was on course for 100% cure until some muppet started shooting their infected. Think the higher upas are planning to eject them until it's all over so we can keep a perfect score

We did that last year in Ankh Mauta. Luckily, they weren't a very large nation, and so didn't negatively impact our numbers too much.

Also, I checked on Ankh Mauta again, and noticed they did worse this year than when I led them last year.

[Olthar]

Our whole region was on course for 100% cure until some muppet started shooting their infected. Think the higher upas are planning to eject them until it's all over so we can keep a perfect score

We did that last year in Ankh Mauta. Luckily, they weren't a very large nation, and so didn't negatively impact our numbers too much.

Also, I checked on Ankh Mauta again, and noticed they did worse this year than when I led them last year.

My region had 100% cure rate.

[Alleniana]

Mine turned out about 1/20 living, 1/20 infected, 18/20 dead...