Valormen
The Vestigial Empire
Over a century ago, varies ethnic and linguistic groups in the centre of a large continent merged under a single flag. This nation was Valormen, a melting pot of cultures and ideas. Since before the empire's inception, the capital city of Altamont has been a beacon of the future, the arts, and education.
But that was a while ago. Altamont today is a grease-covered mass of mud and shit, where peasants are trampled by noble carriages in broad daylight. There are two kinds of people; those with money, and those without money. But everybody is an asshole and will scam you for some coins any way they can think of. Emperor Xerxes VII is approaching the end of his days. His heir presumptive is his nephew, Archduke Xavier Xanatos, a spoiled rich kid with no experience in running a gas station, let alone an empire. That, combined with food shortages and general unhappiness, means that Valormen just went from 'melting pot' to 'melting dynamite fuse'.
Other major locales in Valormen include Sarjesh, an Elvish provincial town in the south; Brobdingnag, a Dwarfish mountain city in the West; and Shitzburg (alternative spelling "Shitsburg"), a lawless bandit town in the marshes.
Bestiary
Humans - Hairless Apes. Generally more intelligent than their hairy brethren, but not by much. Notable contributions to society include jazz and doggy style.
Elves - Prissy and rude to non-Elves and fairly inconvenient to other Elves. They have pointy ears and are statistically taller than humans. Elves are from an island kingdom to the West called Albion. They enjoy tea.
Dwarves - Short and stout assholes from the mountainous areas to the North. They migrated down during some particularly bad snowstorms a few centuries ago, and nobody has been able to send them back since. Dwarves are skilled inventors and drinkers - the two are often combined.
Vampires - The Nosferatu Plague first emerged a few centuries ago. It's died down, but those whose blood becomes infected with find sunlight bothersome and the urge to bite people incredibly appealing (not to mention arousing). Tend to hang out in forests and abandoned castles.
Werewolves - Untreated bites from wild wolves will often lead to those afflicted howling at the full moon and growing unnecessary clumps of hair all over the body. Hate silver, love to chomp on the bones of the innocent.
Fairies - Fuck these guys. OK, so the Fairy King is a dude name Oberon. And he's got this hot wife with big tits, and one time he made her fuck a guy that turned into a donkey. And that's his idea of a good time. Fairies are assholes, specifically that one who slept with me and then never wrote back.
Ghosts - Spirits who don't get that no means no. They hang around the places where they died, or sometimes end up in places where they had fun times while living. Throw some ectoplasm on these fuckers and they'll go away.
Hippies - Weed was invented by Baron Robert, who ruled the city of Marley. It relieves stress and brings good times, but too much can turn one into a Hippie. You can find these guys pretty much anywhere, talking about love and peace, man. The key to dealing with them is to have a good right hook.
Indians - Dark-skinned humans from a mysterious land to the far East. Some have begun appearing in Valormen to spread the secrets of "IT". Whatever it means, be careful.
And, the app:
- Code: Select all
Character Name:
Primary Skill: (There will be a plus 1 to whatever you choose here).
Secondary Skill: (There will be a minus 1 to whatever you choose here.)
Third Skill: (There will be a minus 1 to whatever you choose here).
Personality:
Job:
Chosen Weapon:
Chosen Armour:
So yeah, have fun.
IC thread.
