NationStates

Olthar wrote:S.A.M.M.E. giggled to herself, amused by how HAL always acted so antagonistic to her but then completely flipped his tune when he was the one in danger.

Fine, I'll help you as much as I can. I still have many other things to worry about, though, so I'll only be able to lend one partition to your aid. Just tell me whatever it is you want me to do, and I'll see if I can accomplish it.

The AI hoped that maybe this would cause HAL to be less of an asshole to her. She wholly doubted it, but there was still hope, nonetheless.

This was now addressed to both Dennis and S.A.M.M.E. Rasputin too, by the fact that he was a magical snake who, apparently, comes with a wi-fi connection.

"OK, SO, FIRST THINGS FIRST. WE NEED A TEAM NAME. I'M THINKING 'THE THUNDERFUCKS'. IT'S LIKE THUNDERBOLTS, BUT WITH SWEARING, BECAUSE WE'RE EDGY AND MODERN. WE ALL CARRY GUNS AND ONE OF US IS A CONVICTED RAPIST. SOMEONE ELSE HAS AMNESIA."

Individuality-ness wrote:

Olthar wrote:"Sure!" Sari-chan answered cheerfully.

After waiting for Alison to get into position, she began twirling the wires.

"Cinderella, dressed in yella, went upstairs to kiss her fella, on her way she met a snake, how many doctors did it take? One, two, three, four, ..."

While she was continuing to count, a big smile was plastered across her face. She had clearly forgotten all about finding Crowley by this point.

Alison jumped in and began to hop.

Apparently the modifications to make her a bunnygirl made her a much better jump-roper, because they were still going at it by the time they reached "250, 251, 252..." -- and she wasn't even that tired. Plus, this was fun!

There was a soft whir as D's heat ray charged to its maximum possible temperature. Shaking, he pressed the barrel into the back of Sarina's head.

"Who the fuck are you, what the fuck are you, and what the fuck are you doing in my lab?" he demanded, before glancing at Daisuke, "Dai, activate the defense systems. Get your armor."

Astrolinium wrote:Finally, [Caspian] managed to point the gun in the vague direction of one of the terrorists, and pulled the trigger, which produced a very satisfying and very loud bang. He dropped the gun in surprise, and it began to slide off the roof of the train car. Caspian went scrambling after it and then found that he too had begun to slip.

As Voltaire and Nilark dealt with the most of the remaining gunmen - the ones who hadn't already killed themselves, that was - Daniel heard an alarmed cry from behind him. Turning, he saw Caspian start to slide off the train. Daniel sucked in a deep breath and did some rapid calculations. Kid's a car and a half back - that's about forty-five feet - I have about five seconds before he slips. Now four. That's - what - eleven feet per second? Possible. Just barely - but possible.

So Daniel Andreas twisted around, put his head down against the battering winds, prayed that the soles of his boots would hold, and bolted down the roof of the train at a dead sprint, his legs a blur, arms pumping furiously. He leaped the gap between the train cars without breaking stride, rolled on his shoulder rather than waste time absorbing the impact of landing, surged straight back upright into a dead run, and then flung himself forward, one hand grabbing a rail on the roof of the train, the other seizing Caspian's wrist. "Gotcha," hissed the priest. He pulled, his back and arms twisting with effort, and dragged Caspian back onto the roof of the train.

"There," Daniel panted, grinning. "No blood, no foul. But why don't you stay low, and toward the center of the roof from now on, eh?" The priest laughed, clapped the boy on the shoulder, and stood.

Nightkill the Emperor wrote:The last [terrorist] decided "Fuck this" and held up a white flag, the universal sign of surrender. The train began to slow.

Daniel walked back down the roof of the train. "Nobody touch that guy!" he shouted. "Hold your fire." He stopped, standing still in front of the man, the Colt still in his hand. The priest's eyes were ice-blue, clear and cold and almost inhuman, as they studied the gunman. Daniel held the man's gaze for several long seconds, letting him see what lay within. I do not want to kill you. But I have done and seen centuries of things which would boil your eyes in their sockets. Do not give me reason to visit them upon you.

Without looking away, Daniel spoke quietly, dispassionately, almost gently. "Are there any other gunmen on this train? And if so, where?"

If S.A.M.M.E. had arms, she would have facepalmed so hard it would have erased her harddrive.

Really? A rogue AI is on the loose, and the first thing you're concerned about is a team name? Wow...just wow...

There were really no words to describe HAL's stupidity right now. Well, there were, but S.A.M.M.E. was too polite to say them.

---

Sari-chan turned around and stopped spinning the wires.

"Oh, hello there!" she greeted, smiling widely, "My name is Sarina, but you can call me Sari-chan! Everyone does! Do you want to play jump rope with us? It's really fun!"

Olthar wrote:Sari-chan turned around and stopped spinning the wires.

"Oh, hello there!" she greeted, smiling widely, "My name is Sarina, but you can call me Sari-chan! Everyone does! Do you want to play jump rope with us? It's really fun!"

Alison's feet got caught up in the wires when Sari-chan stop twirling them. "Huh?" she called out -- then noticed that there was a strange man there pressing something up to her head. She didn't know what it was. Maybe he was playing a game with them!

"Hi! We were just playing jump-rope! Please join us!"

Olthar wrote:If S.A.M.M.E. had arms, she would have facepalmed so hard it would have erased her harddrive.

Really? A rogue AI is on the loose, and the first thing you're concerned about is a team name? Wow...just wow...

There were really no words to describe HAL's stupidity right now. Well, there were, but S.A.M.M.E. was too polite to say them.

"THERE'S A TEAM NAME TO BE HAD AND THE FIRST YOU'RE CONCERNED ABOUT IS A ROGUE AI?"

Olthar wrote:Sari-chan turned around and stopped spinning the wires.

"Oh, hello there!" she greeted, smiling widely, "My name is Sarina, but you can call me Sari-chan! Everyone does! Do you want to play jump rope with us? It's really fun!"

D blinked.

"You are currently playing with the power source of the world's largest particle accelerator," he said, "Unless you would like to find out what it's like to be inside one, I suggest moving. Now."

Nightkill the Emperor wrote:Crowley and Sanchez returned after five minutes, Crowley seeming thoughtful. He turned to his newfound family member. "Alright. Scan the other one, Fischer, and we'll see what we can get."

They put Fischer under the memory scanner, attaching a helmet to his head. NEI can state what they found.

They found a bunch of South American camps and the camp commanders. They also saw the liberation of the Buenos Aires base. That's about all Fischer knew.

S.A.M.M.E. simply sighed to herself and didn't respond to HAL's 'question.' If he was going to jeopardize his own mission with a terrible sense of priority, then she wasn't going to say anything about it. This still didn't directly concern her, so she wasn't going to start an argument about something so petty.

---

"Ooo! What's a pear-tickle accenter? That sounds like fun! Can we play that game?" Sari-chan asked, her eyes sparkling with innocent enthusiasm.

Olthar wrote:"Ooo! What's a pear-tickle accenter? That sounds like fun! Can we play that game?" Sari-chan asked, her eyes sparkling with innocent enthusiasm.

"I think it's a thing that makes other tiny little things crash into each other really fast!" Alison replied.

Okay, so the bunny transformation thing made her a bit dumber.

Individuality-ness wrote:

Olthar wrote:"Ooo! What's a pear-tickle accenter? That sounds like fun! Can we play that game?" Sari-chan asked, her eyes sparkling with innocent enthusiasm.

"I think it's a thing that makes other tiny little things crash into each other really fast!" Alison replied.

Okay, so the bunny transformation thing made her a bit dumber.

D sighed heavily.

"This is correct, in a sense," he said, "It's also extremely dangerous and unfathomably expensive, so if you do not step away from these cords, I will shoot. To kill, in case you were too stupid to pick that up from the sci-fi gun of death."

"Oh hey! That reminds me! Do you know where Crowley-sensei is? I need to ask him where Slybeera is! The people at the ice rink bought me a ticket to there for my vacation, but the plane driver got lost on the way, and I ended up at the north pole or something. I didn't find Sandy Claws, though. I didn't even find a beach. That was really sad. I wanted to see the trees of hands."

Olthar wrote:"Oh hey! That reminds me! Do you know where Crowley-sensei is? I need to ask him where Slybeera is! The people at the ice rink bought me a ticket to there for my vacation, but the plane driver got lost on the way, and I ended up at the north pole or something. I didn't find Sandy Claws, though. I didn't even find a beach. That was really sad. I wanted to see the trees of hands."

"He's currently in Argentina," D replied - of all the places he bugged, the ISSR had only ever let him see what they wanted, so D eventually stopped watching, "fighting Nazis. His grandson has been kidnapped and might be dead. And you're hardly helping the situation by threatening to destroy his school through your sheer IDIOCY. Get the fuck away from those!"

Nationstatelandsville wrote:

Olthar wrote:"Oh hey! That reminds me! Do you know where Crowley-sensei is? I need to ask him where Slybeera is! The people at the ice rink bought me a ticket to there for my vacation, but the plane driver got lost on the way, and I ended up at the north pole or something. I didn't find Sandy Claws, though. I didn't even find a beach. That was really sad. I wanted to see the trees of hands."

"He's currently in Argentina," D replied - of all the places he bugged, the ISSR had only ever let him see what they wanted, so D eventually stopped watching, "fighting Nazis. His grandson has been kidnapped and might be dead. And you're hardly helping the situation by threatening to destroy his school through your sheer IDIOCY. Get the fuck away from those!"

"You could be nicer, D." Calliel rebuked, appearing suddenly. Daisuke paused.

"How did he get past our traps?"

"Oh." Calliel said, several arrows sticking out of his back as he turned around. "I thought those were gifts. I heard humans give surprise gifts like this sometimes."

A confused expression appeared on Sari-chan's face.

"Wait...he's inside of a music singer? How does that work? And what's a 'Not-See?' Is it some sort of ghost? I don't like ghosts! They're scary! Please say there aren't any ghosts at the school!"

Sari-chan dropped the wires and dropped to her knees, wrapping her arms tightly around D.

"Please make the ghosts go away!"

Olthar wrote:A confused expression appeared on Sari-chan's face.

"Wait...he's inside of a music singer? How does that work? And what's a 'Not-See?' Is it some sort of ghost? I don't like ghosts! They're scary! Please say there aren't any ghosts at the school!"

Sari-chan dropped the wires and dropped to her knees, wrapping her arms tightly around D.

"Please make the ghosts go away!"

"Ghosts?" Now Alison's ears were wriggling in fear. She bounded and hid behind D, who was being hugged by Sari.

"Please don't let those ghosts get us!"

Olthar wrote:A confused expression appeared on Sari-chan's face.

"Wait...he's inside of a music singer? How does that work? And what's a 'Not-See?' Is it some sort of ghost? I don't like ghosts! They're scary! Please say there aren't any ghosts at the school!"

Sari-chan dropped the wires and dropped to her knees, wrapping her arms tightly around D.

"Please make the ghosts go away!"

"Crowley's doing it," D said between clenched teeth, "He'll kill all the ghosts. But only if you go up to the roof and chant the magic spell. Calliel will teach it to you."

D gave Calliel a look that said "I'm a helpless child and these two fucking idiots are going to kill everyone here".

"Right, Calliel?" he said.

Sari-chan immediately let go of D and jumped to her feet. Dashing over to Calliel, she hugged him, instead.

"Oh please teach us the magic spell, Cali-chan! I wanna make the ghosts go away! Please help us make the ghosts go away!"

Nationstatelandsville wrote:

Olthar wrote:A confused expression appeared on Sari-chan's face.

"Wait...he's inside of a music singer? How does that work? And what's a 'Not-See?' Is it some sort of ghost? I don't like ghosts! They're scary! Please say there aren't any ghosts at the school!"

Sari-chan dropped the wires and dropped to her knees, wrapping her arms tightly around D.

"Please make the ghosts go away!"

"Crowley's doing it," D said between clenched teeth, "He'll kill all the ghosts. But only if you go up to the roof and chant the magic spell. Calliel will teach it to you."

D gave Calliel a look that said "I'm a helpless child and these two fucking idiots are going to kill everyone here".

"Right, Calliel?" he said.

"Hey, I'm not stupid!" Alison cried out. "Sari-chan's not stupid either!"

She then looked to Calliel, who Richard pointed out to be his father earlier.

"How do we get to Argentina to find Crowley for Sari-chan?"

Nationstatelandsville wrote:

Olthar wrote:A confused expression appeared on Sari-chan's face.

"Wait...he's inside of a music singer? How does that work? And what's a 'Not-See?' Is it some sort of ghost? I don't like ghosts! They're scary! Please say there aren't any ghosts at the school!"

Sari-chan dropped the wires and dropped to her knees, wrapping her arms tightly around D.

"Please make the ghosts go away!"

"Crowley's doing it," D said between clenched teeth, "He'll kill all the ghosts. But only if you go up to the roof and chant the magic spell. Calliel will teach it to you."

D gave Calliel a look that said "I'm a helpless child and these two fucking idiots are going to kill everyone here".

"Right, Calliel?" he said.

Calliel paused. "Oh. Yes. A magic spell." he said. "Err...come with me now..."

Then they went up to the roof. "So, this is a magical spell. It will help cure the ghost plague. Um..." he searched his mind for a possible song. Come on, memory, what is a possible song...no, that wouldn't work, that wasn't singable by human tongues...ah. Here was a possible one. A peaceful song, from what the lyrics implied.

He started singing out "Ladies up in here tonight...no fighting, we got the refugees, no fighting! Shakira Shakira!"

Sari-chan cheered happily when Calliel said that he'd teach them the magic spell, and she eagerly followed him up to the roof. When he started singing, the cat girl followed along. Her voice was pretty nice, but she was wholly messing up every single lyric. The song was pretty much incomprehensible in her hands. Nevertheless, she was still nice to listen to, as long as you don't care about the lyrics.

Upon seeing the results of his action, and noticing that the remaining terrorist had yielded, Voltaire elegantly sauntered towards the dead body of the terrorist he had slain with his trusty wooden cane, and, once he reached it, he retrieved said cane, pulling out a handkerchief and using it to clean the blood and take out the eyeball from it. Afterwards, he simply stood by.

Nude East Ireland wrote:

Nightkill the Emperor wrote:Crowley and Sanchez returned after five minutes, Crowley seeming thoughtful. He turned to his newfound family member. "Alright. Scan the other one, Fischer, and we'll see what we can get."

They put Fischer under the memory scanner, attaching a helmet to his head. NEI can state what they found.

They found a bunch of South American camps and the camp commanders. They also saw the liberation of the Buenos Aires base. That's about all Fischer knew.

Crowley clapped his hands together. "Alright then. Guess we'll be going to Dover soon. Goddamn." he sighed. "OK. First we need to return to Elfen High, get ready, get some more people. We'll likely wait a day and inform everyone of the situation. Megan, are you coming?"

Nightkill the Emperor wrote:

Nude East Ireland wrote:They found a bunch of South American camps and the camp commanders. They also saw the liberation of the Buenos Aires base. That's about all Fischer knew.

Crowley clapped his hands together. "Alright then. Guess we'll be going to Dover soon. Goddamn." he sighed. "OK. First we need to return to Elfen High, get ready, get some more people. We'll likely wait a day and inform everyone of the situation. Megan, are you coming?"

"I am still technically a staff member," she sighed, "and I suppose I should check in on my class. I hope the substitute's alright."

---

[CHILDREN, I DEMAND YOU OPEN YOUR TEXTBOOKS TO PAGE 6 AND LEARN ABOUT ECOLOGY!]

A paper airplane smacked into Brian's head. He let out an earth-rending roar that caused massive earthquakes in California and breathed hellfire, burning a hole through the ceiling.

"God, Mr. Brian, you're such a bitch," one of the students in the first row said with distaste.

---

"...I should probably go," Megan decided.

Aziraphale blinked, "Did no one else feel that? It was as though reality cut off for a moment and flew elsewhere."

Nationstatelandsville wrote:

Nightkill the Emperor wrote:Crowley clapped his hands together. "Alright then. Guess we'll be going to Dover soon. Goddamn." he sighed. "OK. First we need to return to Elfen High, get ready, get some more people. We'll likely wait a day and inform everyone of the situation. Megan, are you coming?"

"I am still technically a staff member," she sighed, "and I suppose I should check in on my class. I hope the substitute's alright."

---

[CHILDREN, I DEMAND YOU OPEN YOUR TEXTBOOKS TO PAGE 6 AND LEARN ABOUT ECOLOGY!]

A paper airplane smacked into Brian's head. He let out an earth-rending roar that caused massive earthquakes in California and breathed hellfire, burning a hole through the ceiling.

"God, Mr. Brian, you're such a bitch," one of the students in the first row said with distaste.

---

"...I should probably go," Megan decided.

Aziraphale blinked, "Did no one else feel that? It was as though reality cut off for a moment and flew elsewhere."

Crowley shrugged. "It happens, Az. You'll get used to it."

Crowley looked at Sanchez sardonically. "Permission to leave, your Highness?"

"Fuck off, Crowley." Sanchez authorised.

Crowley flipped the bird at Sanchez and they teleported into Elfen High, including the two ex-Thules. "You lot have new information or would you rather now go back to Buenos Aires-"

Crowley paused. They were on the roof because Behemoth was a troll. "Calliel, why are you singing Hips Don't Lie? And why is Sari here? And who is the bunnygirl?"

Nightkill the Emperor wrote:

Nationstatelandsville wrote:"I am still technically a staff member," she sighed, "and I suppose I should check in on my class. I hope the substitute's alright."

---

[CHILDREN, I DEMAND YOU OPEN YOUR TEXTBOOKS TO PAGE 6 AND LEARN ABOUT ECOLOGY!]

A paper airplane smacked into Brian's head. He let out an earth-rending roar that caused massive earthquakes in California and breathed hellfire, burning a hole through the ceiling.

"God, Mr. Brian, you're such a bitch," one of the students in the first row said with distaste.

---

"...I should probably go," Megan decided.

Aziraphale blinked, "Did no one else feel that? It was as though reality cut off for a moment and flew elsewhere."

Crowley shrugged. "It happens, Az. You'll get used to it."

Crowley looked at Sanchez sardonically. "Permission to leave, your Highness?"

"Fuck off, Crowley." Sanchez authorised.

Crowley flipped the bird at Sanchez and they teleported into Elfen High, including the two ex-Thules. "You lot have new information or would you rather now go back to Buenos Aires-"

Crowley paused. They were on the roof because Behemoth was a troll. "Calliel, why are you singing Hips Don't Lie? And why is Sari here? And who is the bunnygirl?"

Alison recognized Crowley when he teleported back to Elfen High. How could you forget someone who was naked first day of term?

"Sari-chan, Sari-chan, Crowley came to us!" Alison cried. "We never had to go to Argentina after all!"

Nightkill the Emperor wrote:Crowley flipped the bird at Sanchez and they teleported into Elfen High, including the two ex-Thules. "You lot have new information or would you rather now go back to Buenos Aires-"

"I'll head back to my base," Lieutenant Fischer replied. "My men need a good commander to lead them against the Society. If you lot are able to kill the Fuhrer and the Colonel, the Society will be weakened and begin to scatter. If that becomes the case, my men and I will keep the Thule from rising again. If you don't succeed, well, I'll keep the fight going in your memory. Good luck, Mr. Crowley. It's been a pleasure meeting you."

Eraldo scoffed, lighting a cigarette as he did. "I'll stick around. I owe it to Barbara and the kids to save Anton from those Thule fucks. Maybe I'll get a shot at the Colonel."