Europa Universalis: New World (Alternate Earth: OOC/Open)

[Ralnis]

Is thei any problem with mine?

[Victorious Islands of Mitonesia]

Did the remetents see my letters?

[Horusland]

Oh, great. Just great. 6 pages during the night.
So, the past two days of normal were just a break from the crazy?
Well, I'm going to read these posts now.

Well, at least it isn't the normal 10 from the weekdays.

[Ayreonia]

Oh, great. Just great. 6 pages during the night.
So, the past two days of normal were just a break from the crazy?
Well, I'm going to read these posts now.

Well, at least it isn't the normal 10 from the weekdays.

We don't do normal here.

[Megale Epeiros]

Hopefully the final app.

NS Name: Megale Epeiros
Nation Name: The Eternal Empire of Srivijaya
Capital City: Temasek (administrative), Palembang (cultural)
Government Type: Absolute monarchy
Head of State: Emperor
Claimed Territory: Malay Peninsula, Singapore, Sumatra, Java, the Moluccas, Sabah, a small area on the north-eastern tip of Madagascar, a small pocket in southeast India, half of Sri Lanka
State/National Religion: Islam
Dominant Religion: Islam, Buddhism, Hinduism
Minority Religion(s): Christianity, Confucianism, Taoism
Population: 16 218 000
Population Growth Rate: 0.29%
Military Organization: Tributary levies
Military Size: 224 392
Fleet Size: 792
National Flag:

(Image)

National Focus: Tradewinds, Grand Army
National Idea(s): Printing Press, Arquebus, Colombian Exchange
Trade Policy: Mercantilism
Civil Freedoms: Serfdom
Primary Import(s): Tea, rice, gunpowder, firearms
Primary Export(s): Tin, gold, spices, tea, fabrics and textiles, timber
Primary Culture: Malay
Accepted Cultures: Proto-Malays, Tamil

Brief Description of your nation's History:

Following success in totally smashing the Singhasari kingdom — preventing the fall of Srivijaya from their successors, Majapahit — Srivijaya launched naval raids and, later, an invasion in the year 921, completely destroying the Chola dynasty. The territory gained from this campaign is still disputed due to claims from the Sri Lankan Empire. From then on, Srivijayan culture spread, founding colonies all the way in Madagascar (indeed, Malay sailors did possess great nautical skills in real life — they were able to sail all the way to East Africa, and their distant cousins, the Polynesians, settled in islands in the Pacific).

Meanwhile, in the 11th century, Srivijaya began dominating the rest of Indochina, gaining total control by the 13th. They also started trading with the Chinese for firearms and gunpowder, which proved to be beneficial in conquest of the rest of the Malay Archipelago. In 1376, an interregnum took over, dubbed the Shattering of the 14th Century by scribes, following the death of Emperor Megat Sikander Shah IV, with the throne being fought over by numerous nobles and Sikander's exiled prince, Suleiman II, in Kataha.

This resulted in the splintering of the once great Empire, leading to three portions: One controlled by Suleiman II, which comprises of Peninsular Malaysia, the islands of Java, Sumatra and the Moluccas, and the colonies in South India and Madagascar (each contributing no more than 0.73% and 0.83% of the population respectively); one controlled by his second cousin Saif Mansur, which comprises of the Riau Islands, Borneo and the Philippines; the other by an ambitious warlord, Paduka Seri Wijaya, who has total domination of Indochina and its resources.

The situation has not much changed a hundred and twenty four years later, with the turning of the century. Suleiman VI hopes to take back the land which was rightfully his, now taken away by once-loyal subjects. Once he does this can he set his sights upon the rest of the world.

Brief Description of your nation's economy:

In its prime, Srivijaya had full supremacy of the spice trade, drawing from resources all over the Malay Archipelago. Tin and gold became precious commodities in large demand by the West, and thanks to its strategic location between China and India, and the fact that the land was mostly protected from the monsoon winds thanks to the possession of a natural barrier, the Bukit Barisan mountain range, was a center of trade in the region.

The Shattering made a large dent in Srivijaya's position as the hegemon of the region, yet Srivijaya remains prosperous. In order to regain their proper place in the world, the ruling king must look to new sources of income to facilitate trade. Only with a strong economy and a waterfall in their coffers can they then regain lands that once were theirs.

Brief Description of your nation's government:

While the emperor reigns supreme at the top, he is in turn aided by the Four-fold Council; with the Vizier, Admiral, Treasurer, and Head of Police at the top, followed by eight other aristocrats, then sixteen aristocrats, and finally thirty-two aristocrats, numbering to a total of sixty.

The Vizier is often from a different branch of the same family of the Emperor; rival king Saif Mansur himself was a Vizier in Megat Sikander Shah IV's reign. The Vizier not only served as the Emperor's main advisor, but served too as the Commander-in-Chief and was usually half the reason for the success of Srivijaya. Make no mistake, however, they are quick to turn on their masters as soon as their backs are turned to them, and are often forging political alliances in secret against the ruling king. As Emperor, Suleiman IV must deal with internal threats as well as external.

The Admiral is seen as a champion of the Srivijayan cause, an embodiment of the ideals of a true Srivijayan warrior. Often, princes of the Emperor serve a tenure as an Admiral to prove their worth and the strength of their hearts and sword arms, raiding all across the Malay Archipelago. In fact, Suleiman II too was part of this honorable tradition. However, after sustaining a crushing defeat by a Bugis Confederacy, his reputation was tarnished, seen as a weak Emperor and not worthy of commanding the people's respect, and was in turn exiled to Kataha.

The Head of Police is in charge of the people's safety as well as the state. Fairly straightforward, he is in charge of crushing any hope of crime or corruption in the area; well, at least in theory. He is also responsible for dealing with threats of insurrection and rebellion in the Empire. In the Shattering, the Head of Police in fact supported the insurrections, especially Paduka Seri Wijaya's faction, hoping to divide the factions so that he too could claim the Empire for himself. However, the tables were turned when the Head of Police, upon conquering Sumatera from Paduka Seri Wijaya, was slain by Suleiman II in combat when he took Sumatera from him just a week later.

Brief Description of your nation's populace:

The land of Srivijaya is one of numerous cultures and peoples, ranging from the distant Malagasy in the west to the Proto-Malays such as the Senoi and the Orang Laut in the east. The Srivijayans descend from a race of naturally skilled sailors that harnessed the winds of the monsoon and sailed all the way to East Africa in the West to the Easter Islands in the East, and from the northern tip of Australia in the South to distant Japan in the north. There are some who even claim that the Malays discovered the New Land first, but that only seems to be a fringe theory. They are primarily a warrior culture, launching raids and invasions into enemy lands for loot and resources as well as the dominance of the seas, similar to ancient Mycenae. They have also founded numerous colonies along the coastlines of Asia, alike to the Phoenicians and their colonies across the Mediterranean. However, only a small portion of those colonies are under active Srivijayan control.

RP Example: I was an active RPer, but since most RPs I've joined in the past are probably now long dead or have descended into oblivion, I have decided to write one myself.

Kutaraja Singhasari
917 AD

Against the reflection of a pale waxing moon, the waves gently lapped against the narrow stretch of sand that was the beach, towards the grand city of Kutaraja Singhasari, dim lights illuminating the wooden buildings amid the yawns of distant slumber. Nary a creak nor a groan sounded from the docks, nor was there the hustle and bustle of the populace. Nothing stirred as far as the eye could see. Guards stood half asleep along the railings of the Grand Palace, spears at the side, eyelids weighed down as if by iron elephants. As the tides glittered with midnight illumination, nothing protruded through the foggy horizon, except the distant edges of what seemed to be inky black rocks, glistening in the darkness.

"Full speed," commanded Emperor Suleiman I Shah, as his flagship pierced the veil that was the mist, obscuring his troops from detection. "If we are to take advantage of their slumber, we cannot afford to dally."

He was met with nods of approval, and the faint whisperings of hushed orders. Oars dug into the depths ever faster, soldiers readied their spears and machetes, and artillery men prepared mangonels in anticipation.

As they crossed the threshold, Suleiman I stopped and addressed his men. Now was the time for stealth and subtlety no longer. Now was the time for glory and bloodshed.

"My brothers, true warriors of Srivijaya! Today we make amends with our neighbours of Singhasari! Today we fully repay our debts to them, for it is known that the men of Srivijaya remember their debts!

"Two and twenty years ago, my grandfather, Balaputra Rama Vikrama II, was slain by these vile neighbours of ours, horribly mutilated, and paraded around their square for a fortnight. Five years ago, they slaughtered my father, Sikander II, and took his daughters, my sisters, as slaves. Now, we shall be generous, and pay them back tenfold.

"Burn their houses to the ground! Destroy the very foundations! Slaughter every man, and rip their women and children apart! Parade their entrails throughout the city! Turn the very seas red with their traitorous blood!

Out of the gloom, the 63 ships, carrying 39 000 men altogether, drifted into the bay, though if they were men or monsters when their ships landed, one could not say.

[The Vaktovian Empire]

Ayreonia am I accepted now?

[Ayreonia]

Hopefully the final app.

NS Name: Megale Epeiros
Nation Name: The Eternal Empire of Srivijaya
Capital City: Temasek (administrative), Palembang (cultural)
Government Type: Absolute monarchy
Head of State: Emperor
Claimed Territory: Malay Peninsula, Singapore, Sumatra, Java, the Moluccas, Sabah, a small area on the north-eastern tip of Madagascar, a small pocket in southeast India, half of Sri Lanka
State/National Religion: Islam
Dominant Religion: Islam, Buddhism, Hinduism
Minority Religion(s): Christianity, Confucianism, Taoism
Population: 16 218 000
Population Growth Rate: 0.29%
Military Organization: Tributary levies
Military Size: 224 392
Fleet Size: 792
National Flag:

(Image)

National Focus: Tradewinds, Grand Army
National Idea(s): Printing Press, Arquebus, Colombian Exchange
Trade Policy: Mercantilism
Civil Freedoms: Serfdom
Primary Import(s): Tea, rice, gunpowder, firearms
Primary Export(s): Tin, gold, spices, tea, fabrics and textiles, timber
Primary Culture: Malay
Accepted Cultures: Proto-Malays, Tamil

Brief Description of your nation's History:

Following success in totally smashing the Singhasari kingdom — preventing the fall of Srivijaya from their successors, Majapahit — Srivijaya launched naval raids and, later, an invasion in the year 921, completely destroying the Chola dynasty. The territory gained from this campaign is still disputed due to claims from the Sri Lankan Empire. From then on, Srivijayan culture spread, founding colonies all the way in Madagascar (indeed, Malay sailors did possess great nautical skills in real life — they were able to sail all the way to East Africa, and their distant cousins, the Polynesians, settled in islands in the Pacific).

Meanwhile, in the 11th century, Srivijaya began dominating the rest of Indochina, gaining total control by the 13th. They also started trading with the Chinese for firearms and gunpowder, which proved to be beneficial in conquest of the rest of the Malay Archipelago. In 1376, an interregnum took over, dubbed the Shattering of the 14th Century by scribes, following the death of Emperor Megat Sikander Shah IV, with the throne being fought over by numerous nobles and Sikander's exiled prince, Suleiman II, in Kataha.

This resulted in the splintering of the once great Empire, leading to three portions: One controlled by Suleiman II, which comprises of Peninsular Malaysia, the islands of Java, Sumatra and the Moluccas, and the colonies in South India and Madagascar (each contributing no more than 0.73% and 0.83% of the population respectively); one controlled by his second cousin Saif Mansur, which comprises of the Riau Islands, Borneo and the Philippines; the other by an ambitious warlord, Paduka Seri Wijaya, who has total domination of Indochina and its resources.

The situation has not much changed a hundred and twenty four years later, with the turning of the century. Suleiman VI hopes to take back the land which was rightfully his, now taken away by once-loyal subjects. Once he does this can he set his sights upon the rest of the world.

Brief Description of your nation's economy:

In its prime, Srivijaya had full supremacy of the spice trade, drawing from resources all over the Malay Archipelago. Tin and gold became precious commodities in large demand by the West, and thanks to its strategic location between China and India, and the fact that the land was mostly protected from the monsoon winds thanks to the possession of a natural barrier, the Bukit Barisan mountain range, was a center of trade in the region.

The Shattering made a large dent in Srivijaya's position as the hegemon of the region, yet Srivijaya remains prosperous. In order to regain their proper place in the world, the ruling king must look to new sources of income to facilitate trade. Only with a strong economy and a waterfall in their coffers can they then regain lands that once were theirs.

Brief Description of your nation's government:

While the emperor reigns supreme at the top, he is in turn aided by the Four-fold Council; with the Vizier, Admiral, Treasurer, and Head of Police at the top, followed by eight other aristocrats, then sixteen aristocrats, and finally thirty-two aristocrats, numbering to a total of sixty.

The Vizier is often from a different branch of the same family of the Emperor; rival king Saif Mansur himself was a Vizier in Megat Sikander Shah IV's reign. The Vizier not only served as the Emperor's main advisor, but served too as the Commander-in-Chief and was usually half the reason for the success of Srivijaya. Make no mistake, however, they are quick to turn on their masters as soon as their backs are turned to them, and are often forging political alliances in secret against the ruling king. As Emperor, Suleiman IV must deal with internal threats as well as external.

The Admiral is seen as a champion of the Srivijayan cause, an embodiment of the ideals of a true Srivijayan warrior. Often, princes of the Emperor serve a tenure as an Admiral to prove their worth and the strength of their hearts and sword arms, raiding all across the Malay Archipelago. In fact, Suleiman II too was part of this honorable tradition. However, after sustaining a crushing defeat by a Bugis Confederacy, his reputation was tarnished, seen as a weak Emperor and not worthy of commanding the people's respect, and was in turn exiled to Kataha.

The Head of Police is in charge of the people's safety as well as the state. Fairly straightforward, he is in charge of crushing any hope of crime or corruption in the area; well, at least in theory. He is also responsible for dealing with threats of insurrection and rebellion in the Empire. In the Shattering, the Head of Police in fact supported the insurrections, especially Paduka Seri Wijaya's faction, hoping to divide the factions so that he too could claim the Empire for himself. However, the tables were turned when the Head of Police, upon conquering Sumatera from Paduka Seri Wijaya, was slain by Suleiman II in combat when he took Sumatera from him just a week later.

Brief Description of your nation's populace:

The land of Srivijaya is one of numerous cultures and peoples, ranging from the distant Malagasy in the west to the Proto-Malays such as the Senoi and the Orang Laut in the east. The Srivijayans descend from a race of naturally skilled sailors that harnessed the winds of the monsoon and sailed all the way to East Africa in the West to the Easter Islands in the East, and from the northern tip of Australia in the South to distant Japan in the north. There are some who even claim that the Malays discovered the New Land first, but that only seems to be a fringe theory. They are primarily a warrior culture, launching raids and invasions into enemy lands for loot and resources as well as the dominance of the seas, similar to ancient Mycenae. They have also founded numerous colonies along the coastlines of Asia, alike to the Phoenicians and their colonies across the Mediterranean. However, only a small portion of those colonies are under active Srivijayan control.

RP Example: I was an active RPer, but since most RPs I've joined in the past are probably now long dead or have descended into oblivion, I have decided to write one myself.

Kutaraja Singhasari
917 AD

Against the reflection of a pale waxing moon, the waves gently lapped against the narrow stretch of sand that was the beach, towards the grand city of Kutaraja Singhasari, dim lights illuminating the wooden buildings amid the yawns of distant slumber. Nary a creak nor a groan sounded from the docks, nor was there the hustle and bustle of the populace. Nothing stirred as far as the eye could see. Guards stood half asleep along the railings of the Grand Palace, spears at the side, eyelids weighed down as if by iron elephants. As the tides glittered with midnight illumination, nothing protruded through the foggy horizon, except the distant edges of what seemed to be inky black rocks, glistening in the darkness.

"Full speed," commanded Emperor Suleiman I Shah, as his flagship pierced the veil that was the mist, obscuring his troops from detection. "If we are to take advantage of their slumber, we cannot afford to dally."

He was met with nods of approval, and the faint whisperings of hushed orders. Oars dug into the depths ever faster, soldiers readied their spears and machetes, and artillery men prepared mangonels in anticipation.

As they crossed the threshold, Suleiman I stopped and addressed his men. Now was the time for stealth and subtlety no longer. Now was the time for glory and bloodshed.

"My brothers, true warriors of Srivijaya! Today we make amends with our neighbours of Singhasari! Today we fully repay our debts to them, for it is known that the men of Srivijaya remember their debts!

"Two and twenty years ago, my grandfather, Balaputra Rama Vikrama II, was slain by these vile neighbours of ours, horribly mutilated, and paraded around their square for a fortnight. Five years ago, they slaughtered my father, Sikander II, and took his daughters, my sisters, as slaves. Now, we shall be generous, and pay them back tenfold.

"Burn their houses to the ground! Destroy the very foundations! Slaughter every man, and rip their women and children apart! Parade their entrails throughout the city! Turn the very seas red with their traitorous blood!

Out of the gloom, the 63 ships, carrying 39 000 men altogether, drifted into the bay, though if they were men or monsters when their ships landed, one could not say.

Okay.

[Ayreonia]

Ayreonia am I accepted now?

I'd like to see your fixed app. Can't really decide without that.

[The Vaktovian Empire]

Ayreonia am I accepted now?

I'd like to see your fixed app. Can't really decide without that.

Well I'm on a mobile device right now its Mindoro hard. And the only time I amnon a computer is when it seems your off. Could it be possible for on of the other Co-ops to accept me based on what's you tell them I need?

[Ayreonia]

I'd like to see your fixed app. Can't really decide without that.

Well I'm on a mobile device right now its Mindoro hard. And the only time I amnon a computer is when it seems your off. Could it be possible for on of the other Co-ops to accept me based on what's you tell them I need?

No. You can post the app at any time. Don't be discouraged if I don't respond immediately. I have a job, my studies, RL friends and my exercising that I take very seriously and never miss (except for today, because I wrecked my lower back because of my own stupidity and am really angry at myself for). When I'm online, I have my own nation to RP, disputes to settle, apps to look through, etc etc. I promise to read it when I can.

[The Vaktovian Empire]

Well I'm on a mobile device right now its Mindoro hard. And the only time I amnon a computer is when it seems your off. Could it be possible for on of the other Co-ops to accept me based on what's you tell them I need?

No. You can post the app at any time. Don't be discouraged if I don't respond immediately. I have a job, my studies, RL friends and my exercising that I take very seriously and never miss (except for today, because I wrecked my lower back because of my own stupidity and am really angry at myself for). When I'm online, I have my own nation to RP, disputes to settle, apps to look through, etc etc. I promise to read it when I can.

I usually get on at around 7 pm eastern standard ike in the US which is about 9 hours from now.

[Boriem]

Hey Boriem, would you be fine if Britannia's first contact in new world is with you instead of Chaconee? The ships could have arrived south of your territory instead of North of Chaconee.
Just so you know, Britain is nice with natives (just swear fealty, accept Emperor as god's true representative (no one cares what religion you follow after that), and give 10 warship a year (or 8,000 gold a month) and 10 slaves a month. We can divide product from mining etc in ratio of 45:55.)

Well, I've already got two European nations on my land, we're Norse, Pagan, and are rather militaristic. Especially in the naval department, so you trying to land would probably spur a confrontation between, us, who have just recently been given more modern technology from the Celts, not to mention that we are, as I said previously, Viking.

Also, all that is required to speak to us is knowledge of Norse. I personally use Norwegian or Icelandic to simulate the language, with Icelandic most likely being closer to the actual tongue of the Skrael Coast. I just prefer to neaten it up, and not use any crazy symbols.

Also, how on Earth did you get 7000 men to the New World the first time? You would've needed practically a whole fleet in order to make that work, not to mention that the close confinements probably would've led to quite a few deaths on the way there.

[Novacom]

Why on Earth have we gone from 1492 to May 1493? stop wanking time away

[Victorious Islands of Mitonesia]

Why on Earth have we gone from 1492 to May 1493? stop wanking time away

There are people who already posted in 1500 so yeah...

[Horusland]

Why on Earth have we gone from 1492 to May 1493? stop wanking time away

There are people who already posted in 1500 so yeah...

Well, then, their posts should not count, if they don't change the date.

[Victorious Islands of Mitonesia]

There are people who already posted in 1500 so yeah...

Well, then, their posts should not count, if they don't change the date.

but 1493 and even 1494 is ok isn't it?

[Novacom]

Correct, but those that are there are close enough for the massive 60 foot long Carib-style war canoes to make it.

Is admit it would be difficult, but it is by no means impossible.

Could you perhaps tell me some of these islands?


@Mond I agree. If for what ever reason he did do that it would take much longer than he seems to point. Anyway like I said earlier, I was hoping until the end of the forth of March according to GMT it would be January of 1493.

One of the co-ops has said until march 5th pretty much it is 1492 so nobody could have posted in the 1500's...

[Victorious Islands of Mitonesia]

Could you perhaps tell me some of these islands?


@Mond I agree. If for what ever reason he did do that it would take much longer than he seems to point. Anyway like I said earlier, I was hoping until the end of the forth of March according to GMT it would be January of 1493.

One of the co-ops has said until march 5th pretty much it is 1492 so nobody could have posted in the 1500's...

He didn't say that. He said he hopped to be at least January 1493 in the end of 4th march.
Correct if I'm wrong Parhe

[Horusland]

Well, then, their posts should not count, if they don't change the date.

but 1493 and even 1494 is ok isn't it?

Each page is about a year, and some want it to be a month. Those posts are too ahead.
Is it that hard to change a date?

[Novacom]

It is when the sole objective appears to be painting by numbers on the map...

[Ayreonia]

How about we all just stop posting dates. They're pretty much unnecessary anyway. We can regularly look back and determine how much time has passed. For example, Romagna is hosting a Christmas feast right now, with the leaders of Venice and Babylon attending. There's a lot of dialogue going on, and progress is slow. After the meeting is over, I'll just check out how the others have done and adjust my timeline accordingly.

[Great Nepal]

Hey Boriem, would you be fine if Britannia's first contact in new world is with you instead of Chaconee? The ships could have arrived south of your territory instead of North of Chaconee.
Just so you know, Britain is nice with natives (just swear fealty, accept Emperor as god's true representative (no one cares what religion you follow after that), and give 10 warship a year (or 8,000 gold a month) and 10 slaves a month. We can divide product from mining etc in ratio of 45:55.)

Well, I've already got two European nations on my land, we're Norse, Pagan, and are rather militaristic. Especially in the naval department, so you trying to land would probably spur a confrontation between, us, who have just recently been given more modern technology from the Celts, not to mention that we are, as I said previously, Viking.

Also, all that is required to speak to us is knowledge of Norse. I personally use Norwegian or Icelandic to simulate the language, with Icelandic most likely being closer to the actual tongue of the Skrael Coast. I just prefer to neaten it up, and not use any crazy symbols.

K.

Also, how on Earth did you get 7000 men to the New World the first time? You would've needed practically a whole fleet in order to make that work, not to mention that the close confinements probably would've led to quite a few deaths on the way there.

Assumed each ship could carry 800 men, so 10 ships: 8000 men.

[Ralnis]

Sorry to interypt your conversation, but can someone look at my app to see if Iam accepted or not?

[Transoxthraxia]

Hey Boriem, would you be fine if Britannia's first contact in new world is with you instead of Chaconee? The ships could have arrived south of your territory instead of North of Chaconee.
Just so you know, Britain is nice with natives (just swear fealty, accept Emperor as god's true representative (no one cares what religion you follow after that), and give 10 warship a year (or 8,000 gold a month) and 10 slaves a month. We can divide product from mining etc in ratio of 45:55.)

Well, I've already got two European nations on my land, we're Norse, Pagan, and are rather militaristic. Especially in the naval department, so you trying to land would probably spur a confrontation between, us, who have just recently been given more modern technology from the Celts, not to mention that we are, as I said previously, Viking.

Also, all that is required to speak to us is knowledge of Norse. I personally use Norwegian or Icelandic to simulate the language, with Icelandic most likely being closer to the actual tongue of the Skrael Coast. I just prefer to neaten it up, and not use any crazy symbols.

Also, how on Earth did you get 7000 men to the New World the first time? You would've needed practically a whole fleet in order to make that work, not to mention that the close confinements probably would've led to quite a few deaths on the way there.

Well hey, you need any half-Viking, Half-Dakotan warriors to help you out, just send Rohnst a good ol' messenger. We'll probably help out. Probably.

[Heirosoloa]

Well, for one thing, you know basically nothing of the land, the animals, the food, and of the people. Then there is the fact that the tropics isn't going to be something that Europeans are used to. I mean, there might be no winter, but that because there are two season, wet and dry, which is also very new, and its very humid and hot, like, all the time, which really messes with your crops.

Yeah, it's not the Amazon is full of friendly animals that will clean your house for you if you sing to them.

It's literally chock full of nastiness: all kinds of fun diseases, fun parasites, fun animals, fun poisons, fun natives with poisoned everything.

I would also like to point out that no, the Amazon is not good for farming, because someone put an entire jungle in the way of your vast, open tracts of land.