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by Nationstatelandsville » Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:08 pm
by Olthar » Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:10 pm
by Ameriganastan » Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:14 pm
Edward Richtofen wrote:Ameri's so tough that he criticized an Insane Asylum and was promptly let out
Sinovet wrote:Ameri's like Honey badger. He don't give a fuck.
Krazakistan wrote: He is a force of negativity for the sake of negativity
Onocarcass wrote:Trying to change Ameri, is like trying to drag a 2 ton block of lead with your d**k.
Immoren wrote:When Ameri says something is shit it's good and when Ameri says some thing is good it's great. *nods*
by Mavorpen » Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:20 pm
by Erinkita » Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:20 pm
by The Nuclear Fist » Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:23 pm
And you touch the distant beaches with tales of brave Ulysses. . .Farnhamia wrote:You're getting a little too fond of the jerkoff motions.
by Amon and Friends » Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:29 pm
Ameriganastan wrote:Laz just stood there, scratching his head.
"Wait...what just happened? Was that a no? Feh, good riddance. I can find other suitable females. Like...ah, that one will do. HEY! LESBIAN WITH THE FLUFFY TAIL!
Laz yelled across the room at Yuzuki.
"Wanna be my mascot!?"
by AETEN II » Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:30 pm
Rupudska wrote:Metanih wrote:Rayne's eyes got wide as quarters when the tail popped out. She looked the epitome of disappointed when it went back to its limp state. "Could... Could I... You know... Pet it?" Rayne stammered a bit, looking down. For Hell's sake, control yourself! Just because she has a tail, does not mean she wants it petted. She thought to herself, but her own thoughts betrayed her a moment later. Then again, it did perk up when I petted the ears... I am sure she would like it. Rayne realized she was begging with her eyes at that point, and despite herself, she didn't stop.
Again, Yuzuki shrugged, puffing her pipe. "I've got no problem with it, so long as you don't pull on it. You haven't earned enough of my trust to get to pull on it." She puffed several more times, thinking of the list of people she kept in her car she allowed to pull on it. It was surprisingly long, but nowhere near as long as the 5-and-a-half megabyte list of her sexual conquests, kept on her computer. "Just don't pet it too much, you'll turn me on."
"Quod Vult, Valde Valt"
Excuse me, sir. Seeing as how the V.P. is such a V.I.P., shouldn't we keep the P.C. on the Q.T.? 'Cause if it leaks to the V.C. he could end up M.I.A., and then we'd all be put out in K.P.
Nationstatelandsville wrote:"Why'd the chicken cross the street?"
"Because your dad's a whore."
"...He died a week ago."
"Of syphilis, I bet."
by Ameriganastan » Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:34 pm
Amon and Friends wrote:Ameriganastan wrote:Laz just stood there, scratching his head.
"Wait...what just happened? Was that a no? Feh, good riddance. I can find other suitable females. Like...ah, that one will do. HEY! LESBIAN WITH THE FLUFFY TAIL!
Laz yelled across the room at Yuzuki.
"Wanna be my mascot!?"
Pierre closed his eyes and facepalmed.
"Lazarian, she's a TEACHER. A freaking TEACHER. And we don't even know if she's a lesbian!"
He sighed. Laz...was not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
"Why can't we just talk to the normal-ish-looking chicks? What about the hippie? Or the fish-girl?"
Edward Richtofen wrote:Ameri's so tough that he criticized an Insane Asylum and was promptly let out
Sinovet wrote:Ameri's like Honey badger. He don't give a fuck.
Krazakistan wrote: He is a force of negativity for the sake of negativity
Onocarcass wrote:Trying to change Ameri, is like trying to drag a 2 ton block of lead with your d**k.
Immoren wrote:When Ameri says something is shit it's good and when Ameri says some thing is good it's great. *nods*
by Nationstatelandsville » Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:36 pm
AETEN II wrote:Rupudska wrote:
Again, Yuzuki shrugged, puffing her pipe. "I've got no problem with it, so long as you don't pull on it. You haven't earned enough of my trust to get to pull on it." She puffed several more times, thinking of the list of people she kept in her car she allowed to pull on it. It was surprisingly long, but nowhere near as long as the 5-and-a-half megabyte list of her sexual conquests, kept on her computer. "Just don't pet it too much, you'll turn me on."
"That would be an absolute shame now wouldn't?" Malal joked as he then cut up the Boar's head into headcheese and started eating the cubes, one by one, and swallowing them whole. He then however turned to Lewis and snapped his fingers, turning the chunk of meat Lewis was eating into concrete.
"I don't take kindly to mortals who believe themselves superior to something that can suck their soul out of their body. Or I could always kill you in the most painful way I can think of, then reanimate your corpse and do it again. I look the way I do because I am the son of Hel, goddess of the Underworld. It is also unwise to upset a Necromancer." Malal said as he then reanimated the cow that the roast was taken from- the poor creature was quite startled at finding itself in its current undead state and lacking several critical organs, yet it was alive. It found this to be a positive development and mooed before standing up and walking out of the hall, adding an undead, partially eaten cow to the collection of critters wandering the school.
At this, Malal chuckled with a death rattle like sound before he turned back to Yuzuki, whom he did find to be quite interesting in a multitude of ways.
"So Yuzuki, you have any need of a servant with no personal needs and is incapable of being worked to death?" Malal asked her as he gestured to the group of skeletons behind him, who were now in an arm wrestling tournament between themselves.
by Amon and Friends » Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:43 pm
Ameriganastan wrote:Amon and Friends wrote:Pierre closed his eyes and facepalmed.
"Lazarian, she's a TEACHER. A freaking TEACHER. And we don't even know if she's a lesbian!"
He sighed. Laz...was not the sharpest knife in the drawer.
"Why can't we just talk to the normal-ish-looking chicks? What about the hippie? Or the fish-girl?"
"Well...she seems like one. I mean, what female demon wouldn't be in awe at the sight of a handsome son of a boar demon like me? I'm a total catch. Plus, she's basically having her tail fellated by that other girl. But fine, if it will get you to cease your complaining, we shall talk to one of the normal ones. Lead me to this fish girl."
by Nightkill the Emperor » Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:45 pm
Nat: Night's always in some bizarre state somewhere between "intoxicated enough to kill a hair metal lead singer" and "annoying Mormon missionary sober".
Swith: It's because you're so awesome. God himself refreshes the screen before he types just to see if Nightkill has written anything while he was off somewhere else.
by Metanih » Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:49 pm
by Constaniana » Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:49 pm
Vareiln wrote:Fel found even more interesting things.
Lazrian and his friend approached that... cat-girl.
Most interesting indeed...
Lazrian's friend was behaving erratic, the cat-girl was hyperactive, and Lazrian seemed unfazed.
He watched from a distance, and thought of approaching them, but decided against it.
Ameriganastan wrote:I work hard to think of those ludicrous Eric adventure stories, but I don't think I'd have come up with rescuing a three armed alchemist from goblin-monkeys in a million years.
Kudos.
by AETEN II » Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:51 pm
Nationstatelandsville wrote:AETEN II wrote:"That would be an absolute shame now wouldn't?" Malal joked as he then cut up the Boar's head into headcheese and started eating the cubes, one by one, and swallowing them whole. He then however turned to Lewis and snapped his fingers, turning the chunk of meat Lewis was eating into concrete.
"I don't take kindly to mortals who believe themselves superior to something that can suck their soul out of their body. Or I could always kill you in the most painful way I can think of, then reanimate your corpse and do it again. I look the way I do because I am the son of Hel, goddess of the Underworld. It is also unwise to upset a Necromancer." Malal said as he then reanimated the cow that the roast was taken from- the poor creature was quite startled at finding itself in its current undead state and lacking several critical organs, yet it was alive. It found this to be a positive development and mooed before standing up and walking out of the hall, adding an undead, partially eaten cow to the collection of critters wandering the school.
At this, Malal chuckled with a death rattle like sound before he turned back to Yuzuki, whom he did find to be quite interesting in a multitude of ways.
"So Yuzuki, you have any need of a servant with no personal needs and is incapable of being worked to death?" Malal asked her as he gestured to the group of skeletons behind him, who were now in an arm wrestling tournament between themselves.
"My dad was a lumberjack," Lewis said simply, "But I guess running the Underworld's cool, too. Must be pretty dull, though. I don't imagine there aren't many bars in Hell."
Lewis continued eating, failing to see Malal had just threatened him. Or perhaps, and this was much more likely, he did notice, but just didn't give a shit.
"And, anyways," he suddenly began, picking his teeth with his fingernail, "I'm not even sure I have a soul. I mean, if I did, I probably would have died about a hundred and thirty years ago. But I don't know. I've never had a... what do you they call it? Colonoscopy? Nah, that can't be right. Ultrasound? Yeah! Yeah, never had one of those."
He took a swig from a flask of bourbon he always carried.
"So, what do you teach, Son of Hel?" he asked, "Hey, by the way, that's an awesome name for a Bruce Willis movie."
"Quod Vult, Valde Valt"
Excuse me, sir. Seeing as how the V.P. is such a V.I.P., shouldn't we keep the P.C. on the Q.T.? 'Cause if it leaks to the V.C. he could end up M.I.A., and then we'd all be put out in K.P.
Nationstatelandsville wrote:"Why'd the chicken cross the street?"
"Because your dad's a whore."
"...He died a week ago."
"Of syphilis, I bet."
by Nationstatelandsville » Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:55 pm
Nightkill the Emperor wrote:Minh was rather annoyed. He had just been clearing out some of the mutated rabbits and various other creatures that ended up crawling the hallways. As the biology teacher here, the variety here could be very useful in some cases, but sometimes it ended up being just annoying. And by annoying, he meant possibly fatal. Crowley may have held himself effectively above the laws of the UK, the UN, physics and sanity, but Minh believed in not pushing the boundries too far.
Minh walked into the mess hall. He generally accepted anything that occurred here. The staff and the students were all crazy or headed there. Minh knew very well he was also crazy by now- he still worked here. That was a good measure of one's insanity.
He sat down next to Lewis, largely because she was a fellow staff member and not trying to kill anyone yet. "Fucking rabbits." he said as his opening. "Rabbits should all die." Another reason he did- he counted on Lewis to hate things with him.
AETEN II wrote:Nationstatelandsville wrote:
"My dad was a lumberjack," Lewis said simply, "But I guess running the Underworld's cool, too. Must be pretty dull, though. I don't imagine there aren't many bars in Hell."
Lewis continued eating, failing to see Malal had just threatened him. Or perhaps, and this was much more likely, he did notice, but just didn't give a shit.
"And, anyways," he suddenly began, picking his teeth with his fingernail, "I'm not even sure I have a soul. I mean, if I did, I probably would have died about a hundred and thirty years ago. But I don't know. I've never had a... what do you they call it? Colonoscopy? Nah, that can't be right. Ultrasound? Yeah! Yeah, never had one of those."
He took a swig from a flask of bourbon he always carried.
"So, what do you teach, Son of Hel?" he asked, "Hey, by the way, that's an awesome name for a Bruce Willis movie."
"Necromancy." Malal hissed as he finished his cup of Ale and motioned to a skeleton to get it re-filled.
"With blood such as mine, it comes naturally. While I certainly do not rival the power my mother has, or any other god of the Underworld, my skill in necromancy certainly makes me one of the greatest masters in the mortal world. It also makes me a suitable medic for the school, seeing that necromancy combined with healing powers allows me to force almost anyone back to life. It seems that it will be useful as well, seeing that the student body of this school looks... foolhardy. I'm surprised that such hormone-filled youth with such powers mixed with alcohol hasn't already resulted in a death." Malal remarked, his heated opinion of Lewis cooling as the conversation drew on. He didn't take kindly to people attacking his appearance. It certainly had its drawbacks, but it made him resistant to most mortal weaponry. Ah... the look upon the faces of those Nazis when they discovered bullets bounced off his exoskeleton- that was priceless.
"You also have a soul. Trust me, I've spent my fair share of time with the undead, and they have certain, traits, that seperate them from the living. You have a soul. You just probably have some sort of lucky mutation combined with a lack of morals. You humans do seem to have a knack for mutating. It's almost a skill." Malal finished before he then turned back to Yuzuki again- these distractions were getting annoying.
by Vareiln » Tue Aug 14, 2012 7:55 pm
Constaniana wrote:Vareiln wrote:Fel found even more interesting things.
Lazrian and his friend approached that... cat-girl.
Most interesting indeed...
Lazrian's friend was behaving erratic, the cat-girl was hyperactive, and Lazrian seemed unfazed.
He watched from a distance, and thought of approaching them, but decided against it.
Edward noticed the guy who looked somewhat bored, and since Edward himself lacked something to do also, he got up and walked over to the other person. "Hi I'm Edward, who are you?" He asked. Eddie wasn't always the best at starting conversations, but at least he was pleasant about it.
by Erinkita » Tue Aug 14, 2012 8:05 pm
by Olthar » Tue Aug 14, 2012 8:34 pm
by Metanih » Tue Aug 14, 2012 9:03 pm
by Cthulhutu » Tue Aug 14, 2012 9:10 pm
by Olthar » Tue Aug 14, 2012 9:16 pm
by Metanih » Tue Aug 14, 2012 9:24 pm
by Olthar » Tue Aug 14, 2012 9:35 pm
by Metanih » Tue Aug 14, 2012 9:40 pm
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