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911 what's your not emergency?

The place to relax, unwind, share a joke, and generally goof off.

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Experina
Lobbyist
 
Posts: 24
Founded: Mar 31, 2020
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Experina » Fri Nov 18, 2022 8:14 am

Give it to the owner!


(Based on a real story)

Help! My car isn't stopping after pressing the brakes. I'm going to crash!
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Washington-Columbia
Chargé d'Affaires
 
Posts: 413
Founded: Jan 29, 2022
Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby Washington-Columbia » Sat Nov 19, 2022 12:02 pm

"And I missed the part where that's my problem.



I'm Out of cash and I want to get an Sprite out of this vending machine!
CBC N5 Weekly News:
High Speed Rail Line starts construction between San Francisco and Redding - Trailer for Halcyon Finale Movie gains 40 million viewers in 36 hours - Most wreckage of Papuan Airliner Recovered SPECIAL NEWS REPORT: Report: Law passed declaring ROC as the True China and establishing relations with Bhutan as 'Tibet'

Million, Billion, Trillion, Rillion! -Dr Seuss's Hitler
If you are an "True American" or a Patriot, then you shouldn't be flying a Confederate flag, endorsing attacks on civil rights, or supporting Putinist Russia.
SHUT UP [names of people who unironically support Nazi Germany], YOURE NOT AN SS OFFICER SENT TO DESTROY WOKE HEGIMONY, YOURE An EDGY 14-YEAR-OLD WHO LIVES IN CHICAGO, IL
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Experina
Lobbyist
 
Posts: 24
Founded: Mar 31, 2020
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Experina » Sat Nov 19, 2022 12:57 pm

Break the glass.

Help! Who has summoned me form my 700 year sleep!
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Fatatatutti
Postmaster-General
 
Posts: 10966
Founded: Jun 02, 2006
Ex-Nation

Postby Fatatatutti » Mon Nov 21, 2022 10:22 am

"Rockabye baby, in the tree-top...."


Help! I dialed 9-1-1 three times and now Beetlejuice is in my living room!
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Experina
Lobbyist
 
Posts: 24
Founded: Mar 31, 2020
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Experina » Tue Nov 22, 2022 8:45 am

Don't worry its going to go super nova. Wait is it the star or not?

Help! Nobody is posting here anymore
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Australian rePublic
Postmaster of the Fleet
 
Posts: 25692
Founded: Mar 18, 2013
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Australian rePublic » Thu Nov 24, 2022 3:39 am

Well, I'm here so...

9-1-1 HELP!!! I literarily flushed $2000 in cash down the toilet
Last edited by Australian rePublic on Thu Nov 24, 2022 3:39 am, edited 1 time in total.
From Greek ancestry Orthodox Christian
I would love to commission infrastructure in Australia. If anyone knows how I, as a lay person, could do so, please TG me. I'm dead serious
We're closer in time to 2050 than 1950

Wonderful Song Quotes

18 Published Issues, 1 Published WA Resolution
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Tummylandia and Susistan
Envoy
 
Posts: 233
Founded: Aug 20, 2022
Left-wing Utopia

Postby Tummylandia and Susistan » Thu Nov 24, 2022 4:11 am

"Go take it if you're a big kid."


"911, all my classmates won't shut up about crushes for the umpteenth time!"
string cheese
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Eclipse-0
Civilian
 
Posts: 1
Founded: Jun 17, 2022
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Eclipse-0 » Thu Nov 24, 2022 7:48 am

Become their crushes' GF/BF, then they'll lose all the hope and give up.

Help! I'm being kidnapped by a witch and got locked in a hut with lots of spooky stuff.
Intertwined Multiverse of Eclipse-0
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Fatatatutti
Postmaster-General
 
Posts: 10966
Founded: Jun 02, 2006
Ex-Nation

Postby Fatatatutti » Thu Nov 24, 2022 10:09 am

Is the house made of gingerbread? You could try to eat your way out.


Help! There's a love knot in my lariat!
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Criminalio
Lobbyist
 
Posts: 15
Founded: Jun 30, 2022
Benevolent Dictatorship

Postby Criminalio » Fri Nov 25, 2022 1:27 am

Try untying the knot. I heard that helps.

My house was just stolen. And all they left was the front door!
Criminalio NOW! - Beach Rodriguez reopens for the first time since its closure during the Criminali Civil War
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Experina
Lobbyist
 
Posts: 24
Founded: Mar 31, 2020
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Experina » Fri Nov 25, 2022 4:49 am

Go track who stole it and use a nuke that we are about to give you to nuke it and destory it


911. if roughly 700k people die each year in hospitals how about we close the hospitals so nobody dies
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Biwolfia
Envoy
 
Posts: 204
Founded: May 22, 2021
Scandinavian Liberal Paradise

Postby Biwolfia » Fri Nov 25, 2022 8:16 am

Sure. Hey! Close the hospitals! Nobody will ever die agai- *bang*

Someone, please help! I've turned into a giant hornet!
The Matriarchal Phantasmocracy of Biwolfia

A Class 1.8 Civilization according to this index
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Fatatatutti
Postmaster-General
 
Posts: 10966
Founded: Jun 02, 2006
Ex-Nation

Postby Fatatatutti » Fri Nov 25, 2022 9:51 am

SWAT!


911? There's a giant dead hornet in my house and I need help to get rid of it!
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Barks Nivvlla
Spokesperson
 
Posts: 148
Founded: Sep 25, 2022
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Barks Nivvlla » Fri Nov 25, 2022 9:53 am

Burn it or something




Help I smell burning hornet!
Waffles anyone?
Here is menu:
https://www.nationstates.net/page=dispatch/id=1779506
2 different Rp realities
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Cachard Calia
Diplomat
 
Posts: 544
Founded: Sep 10, 2022
Democratic Socialists

Postby Cachard Calia » Fri Nov 25, 2022 11:01 am

Stop breathing!

911, I can't breathe!
A communist democracy spreading over RL China, Russia, Mongolia, Scandinavia, and the 'Stans
Tier 11 Type 7 Class 0.714285
LGBTQ+ Rights: 96.9/100
Marxist transgender lesbian with depression
We don't talk about JKR
Pro: UBI, UHC, true football, Ukraine, Taiwan, communism, socialism, equity AND equality, right to arm bears, Sweden, immigration
Anti: religion, capitalism, optimism, anarchy, humanity in general, gridiron, Russia, China, bigotry, phobia, 2nd Amendment
If God exists, he's a f**king asshole
(\__/)
(='.'=)
(")_(")
This is Bunny. Copy and paste him into your sig to help him gain world domination.
( j *  R * ) j_____|__|_

I need to type this out on something with more special characters
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Cataleenia
Envoy
 
Posts: 319
Founded: Apr 11, 2022
Left-wing Utopia

Postby Cataleenia » Fri Nov 25, 2022 12:07 pm

Start breathing then

Help! I can't hold my breath!
WARNING! I am bri’ish, do NOT come within a 50m radius without protection.
Non-Binary They/Them aroace| Autistic (Diagnosed) | ADHD (Not officially diagnosed but meet criteria, awaiting second opinion)
[violet] wrote:Urggg... trawling through ads looking for roman orgies...
[violet] wrote:lol
Hispida wrote:english is a rather tough language. you can learn it through tough thorough thought, though.
Armeattla wrote:You know, watching a personality cult live is pretty fun.
Racoda wrote:
Kuraiva wrote:IS THIS dumpster fire APRIL FOOLS UPDATE or something permanent!?
Nothing is permanent.
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Out Of Control Addy And Arielle
Civilian
 
Posts: 0
Founded: May 23, 2022
Ex-Nation

Postby Out Of Control Addy And Arielle » Fri Nov 25, 2022 7:23 pm

Die

911 the sun is revolving around the earth!
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New Pottsylvania
Civilian
 
Posts: 1
Founded: Nov 25, 2022
Ex-Nation

Postby New Pottsylvania » Fri Nov 25, 2022 7:27 pm

Make a new calendar system

Help! I’m being attacked by a Karen!
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Out Of Control Addy And Arielle
Civilian
 
Posts: 0
Founded: May 23, 2022
Ex-Nation

Postby Out Of Control Addy And Arielle » Fri Nov 25, 2022 7:30 pm

Are you a manager

Help! someone is time traveling everyone back to 1916
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User avatar
Xin Robloxia
Lobbyist
 
Posts: 19
Founded: Dec 23, 2021
Left-Leaning College State

Postby Xin Robloxia » Fri Nov 25, 2022 7:31 pm

i can't do anything im not a cop (proceeds to hang up)

HELP THAT MAN HAS A BOTTLE OF PURE, RAW LEMON JUICE
made my pants undergo nuclear fission
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Soviet Kem
Lobbyist
 
Posts: 12
Founded: Feb 12, 2022
Psychotic Dictatorship

Postby Soviet Kem » Fri Nov 25, 2022 7:32 pm

Drink It!

Help I live in Ohio!
Last edited by Soviet Kem on Fri Nov 25, 2022 7:34 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Ozeanreisende
Chargé d'Affaires
 
Posts: 412
Founded: Jul 24, 2022
Ex-Nation

Postby Ozeanreisende » Fri Nov 25, 2022 7:35 pm

Oh hell naw you be stuck there my dude
-----------------------------------------
Help the Ikea im in is infinite and theres weird tall things inside but its only at night that they attack
Last edited by Ozeanreisende on Fri Nov 25, 2022 7:36 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Ozeanreisende embassy program
Ozeanreisende, a quintiple melting pot of German, English, French, Spanish and danish culture | IRL: I'm a Canadian and my favourite country is Australia | A Class 0.857 Civilization according to this index | Buy military equipment here https://www.nationstates.net/nation=oze ... id=1787474
Ozeanreisende News
Ozeanreisende leaves the ODP to pursue armed neutrality (switzerland moment)
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User avatar
Out Of Control Addy And Arielle
Civilian
 
Posts: 0
Founded: May 23, 2022
Ex-Nation

Postby Out Of Control Addy And Arielle » Fri Nov 25, 2022 7:37 pm

Sending the SWAT team to your current location

Help i got shot in the heart!
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Solansica
Attaché
 
Posts: 99
Founded: Apr 21, 2013
Ex-Nation

Postby Solansica » Fri Nov 25, 2022 8:04 pm

You Give Love A Bad Name is protected under copyright. Furthermore that is not how the lyrics go. Please give your name, address, and phone number slowly so we can notify the RIAA lawyers and get this taken care of.

Help, my neighbor won't stop barbequing chicken every other Saturday afternoon.
Last edited by Solansica on Fri Nov 25, 2022 8:05 pm, edited 2 times in total.
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User avatar
Jskzi
Civilian
 
Posts: 0
Founded: Nov 25, 2022
Ex-Nation

Postby Jskzi » Fri Nov 25, 2022 8:07 pm

Cook some poisoned burgers

Help, my friend wont stop saying "Czechslovakia"!
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