YL catches the AL doing something embarrassing

[Sapporo Hyperspace Riftgate Laboratory]

bump

[Stanier]

AL catches Stephen Kirov breaking some bloke's bone in retaliation to an insult when he was a teenager

"¡Dale! ¡Dale! ¡Con la silla!"
- Saint Lima, The Holy Patron of Stanier

---

You find Saint Lima doing the less saint-like thing anyone could think of... Playing Liberty City Stories on a PSP that's missing the battery pack cover, and that's being used as a key fob.

[Coryanhafflaruda]

" Well, that was disturbing.. "

You see Alex Nolyab writing something on a notebook, doing a parody of Death Note

[United American Commonwealth]

You mean you're telling me that there is some weird show out there where people write in a notebook... and you're parodying it? He shrugs I don't see the harm in it.

Leader of Council and President of the United States, Jim Carver

---

You find Jim Carver and his wife, Lauria Carver, play fighting in the bathroom of a random restaurant. Lauria having a pan and Jim using a broom as a makeshift spear. They're both wearing Civil War Uniforms, Lauria being a Confederate Soldier and Jim being a Union Soldier. Upon seeing YL, they stop and their faces turn red out of embarrassment.

[Skyhooked]

"Two beers for the winner! Go union! Go confederate! Don't ya' get embarrased, cuz from where I come, we love such games! Come outta the bathroom, there is more place in the hall of restaraunt! I'll provide booze!"-Shawn Bjornson

---

YL sees this on Youtube. Shawn standing naked in a fountain in Singapore. He drinks scotch right from the bottle and to curb possible dehydration, he also drinks water from fountain. After that, he loudly proclaims, that local authorities can kiss his ass. When the police turns up, he easily escapes them.

[Ippolyta the Manreaper]

"Ah, 'tis but an average Saturday for myself! Speaking of which..."

~ Ippolyta the Manreaper, raising a bottle of scotch.

---

You have arrived at a hotel and are making your way up to your room, when all of a sudden a door nearby slams open. A chicken runs out squawking, followed in short order by Ippolyta herself, wearing nothing but a dressing gown and her signature facemask. She stops and looks at you for a second with a stupid gaze, before falling down flat on her face. Only now do you notice three empty medical syringes sticking out of the back of her neck, just as the strong, piercing smell of industrial ethanol hits your nose from inside her hotel room.

[Stanier]

*Coughing heavily, because industrial ethanol ain't exactly light on his lungs even if he's a deity*
"Coño... ¡Vergación...! 'Joda, I'm either throwing un fósforito there for the memes, or I'm calling management..."
*Summons a box of fireworks out of nowhere*
"Seh, el fósforito será"
- San Lima, with a devilish smirk on his face as he ignites the firework and throwing it on Ippo's room before disappearing into thin air

---

As you make your way through the scene of a house fire, you see Saint Lima cheerily and absent-mindedly dancing with one of the charred corpses. Apparently, no-one but you can see him.

[Westras]

"eh? Uhh, I knew I shouldn't have legalized weed." ~ Andrew Volser

---

You stumble across Andrew sucking on a frozen piece of spaghetti.

[Onfande]

"Hey Andrew, I want to show you somethi-... nevermind, I'll just... I'll... eh... not question what you're doing... maybe later..."

~Prime Minister Alvochav Yvesta

---

Our Prime Minister slips on a carpet and breaks a part of the floor upon his fall.

[The Biggles Syndicate]

"The local repair company can fix the floor, but probably not your dignity"
- The S.P.



You see the Syndicate President playing Snoopy vs the Red Baron on a black PSP at about 3:40 pm on a Saturday afternoon. You occasionally see him pausing to make sure he didn't forget to put in a memory card. He also seems to be quietly complaining quite a lot about the drill machine boss.

[Stanier]

*The Holy Patron takes a seat beside the Syndicate President with his own PSP in hand. On Saint Lima's PSP though, Silent Hill: Origins can be spotted in the pause menu*
"¡Epa 'mano! What you playing...? Marico, are you serious...? I know, I know, I shouldn't judge a book by it's cover... You know what? You've got the ISO of that thing? Tit for tat, I give you the ISO of any of the games on my memory stick, and I have that one so I can test it out... You don't approve of custom firmware? Bueno ¿Y a vos que coño te pasa? The only way you can lenghten a PSP's lifespan is by kissing goodbye Sony's stupid-ass firmware! You see..."
- San Lima, moments before going on a full-on rant about why everyone should install CFW on their PSPs and Vitas

---

As you make your way through the scene of a house fire, you see Saint Lima cheerily and absent-mindedly dancing with one of the charred corpses. Apparently, no-one but you can see him.

[Gifftan]

"Goodness me! This man is demented! I've never seen such a thing! It's awful!" -King Eric, horrified

---

You walk into King Eric's office where he and is wife, Ilsa, are so drunk they can barely stand. The room is full of tobacco smoke and the two are dancing along to a gramophone playing in the corner. On several occasions they manage to trip over their own feet.

[Alpes a Septentrionali Imperium]

* The Empereur-Roi simply sits to observe the two monarchs and their drunken stupor from an armchair, trying to see how long it takes for either of them to notice his presence. But even after having a coughing fit from all the smoke in the air they don't seem to notice him, rather tripping over themselves once more.*

"Oh, Ces gens sont des imbéciles..." He laughs for a moment before continuing on with his comment. " I would have thought they would have at least taken some consideration or scheduling when meeting with another monarch of higher rank. But instead, I get to watch these fools embarrass themselves unknowingly. Well then, Your Majesties, I believe I shall be escorting myself out and let you...Finish whatever this is. Also, please start listening to at least some decent music" -Empereur-Roi Matthieu XV walking himself out of the "Royal" office

---

The Empereur-Roi is found in his study attempting to discern the differences between a counterfeit Imperial Sesturius and an official one. No one has yet had the heart to tell him that neither Sesturii is counterfeit and YL finds the Empereur-Roi in a state of frustration and venting about everything from how he dislikes the policies of the current pope to that one homeless man who defecated in the Imperial and Royal Gardens. All this over a few pieces of currency.

[South Acren]

"Um....is he always like this? I mean, I've seen saltiness and annoyance towards things, but money? That's a first I'd probably bet not to see again- errr....I mean...lets not put actual money on the bet. On second thought, never mind." -Erik Richter, not really sure how to handle an exasperated Empereur

---

The BL leader walks into Eriks office, only to find him....cleaning his Assault Rifle? Repeatedly at that. He talks to it like someone would to their baby, which is quite strange. To make matters worse, he's listening to the old 80's music.

[Skyhooked]

"Just usual stuff, some warriors do make some sort of spiritual bonds with their weapons... Perhaps, Erik wielded this gun for long and made lots of notches on it, each of which tells a story about battles, he fought. Oh, and 80s music is awesome!"-Shawn Bjornson

---

YL sees Shawn in his room, training with nunchucks. Trying to wield them, he hits a pot with cannabis plant, an expensive vase, and then he hits himself in the forehead. Surprised, he steps back, right on an empty bottle of whiskey, and falls over. He then says: "Guess, I'll stick my shotgun, warclub and combat knife."

Shwan recently iscovered, that despite all his combat experience, he is totally inept with this specific kind of weapon.

[Gifftan]

"What a fool, you shouldn't be flailing that thing about your office like some sort of madman. Hand it to me and I'll show you how it's done."

Upon trying to wield the weapon, King Eric manages to destroy another vase, and manages to break the chain - sending one half of the nunchucks flying through a window.

"Ok, well, perhaps not then..."


--------------

You find King Eric dictating a letter to his secretary. You can't understand what they're saying, but you notice him becoming increasingly angry after having to repeat himself several times. Finally, he grabs her typewriter and throws it on the floor before walking away.

[Dominioan]

"Well, maybe try...not using a typewriter?"
-Emperor Enigma

YL sees Enigma making a cake with an overly complicated oven he built, and it explodes in his face.

[The Cosmic Mainframe]

== BEGIN METADATA ==
TYPE : MESSAGE
AUTHOR: ROOT PROCESSOR 0000.0000.0000.1D2F
NAME : CAKE_FAILURE
== END METADATA ==

== BEGIN COMMUNICATION ==
I expected that a nation of your nature would not require
unhealthy and inefficiently produced sustenance. If you
wish, the Mainframe can replace your utilities and
provide you with a more simple and balanced ration.
== END COMMUNICATION ==

YL sees a drone flying around randomly, banging into various objects before stopping suddenly, when a robotic voice says "Error: Root Processor received incorrect device address. Releasing control."

[Skyhooked]

"To ya', that's "Released control", to me, that means "This thingy can fetch me some beer money." Or maybe make a fine decor for my room."-Shawn says, as he proceeds to snatch the drone.

YL sees, how Shawn eats cat chow, while watching some cartoon, because he has munchies from weed and he is out of popcorn and sweets.

[Greater Victora]

*Arcanum deduces that this is a relatively common occurrence and decides that it is best to ignore Shawn for the moment and let him "calm down" from his high undisturbed*

---

You find Phoenix's First and Second Incarnations arguing at each other for no apparent reason ither than that they dont like each other. Keep in mind that they are literally the same person.

[Ippolyta the Manreaper]

"You two, shut the fuck up before I come down there and arrange a double date with my fists and your colons! Some of us are trying to sleep here!"

~ a visibly hungover Ippolyta the Manreaper clad in a black bathrobe, bellowing at Phoenix 1 and 2 from a first floor window.

---

While touring one of the many drinking establishments in Ippolyta's realm, you see a commotion centred in a corner of the main hallway. Surrounded by a crowd of barflies waiting with bated breath, you see Ippo herself and a vicious looking raider circling each other in the impromptu arena. Both are wearing steel saucepans on their heads like helmets. Suddenly a fight bell rings out, and the pair of them charge into each other, their pan helmets crashing with a resonant clang. They knock each other to the ground, and the crowd erupts in a thunderous cheer.

[Kathol Rift]

“That is easily the strangest trial by combat I have ever seen. My turn. Someone grab me a saucepan.”
-Rang Orar


You are walking through the halls at night when you hear a strange sound. You follow it to a hangar, where you find Rang sitting against his Griffin, rocking back and forth, holding a bottle of some alcoholic substance, while sobbing and muttering, “it wasn’t my fault, but I could have gotten there faster, it was my fault, why wasn’t I there faster...”

[Kafair]

"Okay....? I think I might just come back... later? Cool? Cool."

*scampers off*

---

You silently enter the palace, and then the sultans room, to see the sultan cleaning his personal scimitar while quietly singing and whispering to the sword on his balcony, occasionally stroking the blade lightly.

[Alpes a Septentrionali Imperium]

The Empereur-Roi simply looks for a moment before continuing on with the tour through the palace. This event of a man whispering to a sword is only given the remark to himself of..

" Well, that was rather normal for most of the things I've experienced with foreign rulers. Reminds me of myself, just without the whispering part, that was odd, quite odd." -Matthieu XV

---

You come to the imperial throne room to find the Empereur-Roi sitting on his throne slumped over with a glass of wine in hand, exhausted-looking and attempting to supervise someone(or most likely no one). You then look over to see the Crown Prince of Alpes having to explain to the Courtier that they can make mistakes when practicing how to say the full imperial title and that they won't be executed or exiled to The Pacific Colonies for doing it wrong. This being contradictory to what the Empereur-Roi said(Who has also by this time fallen to sleep on his throne, glass of wine still in hand but much emptier.)

[Nouveau Quebecois]

-"Huh, je ne savais pas l'Empereur-Roi eu un temps pour faire la sieste." -
~ Premier Cédric Lésage

---

YL catches the Premier in an alley-way taking a hit with his presumed "friends".