Ten Thousand Monkey Genocide

[Perikuresu]

MONKEY 1 IS IN MY TUMMY, YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT, I ATE MONKEY 1, I KILLED THE LAST MONKEY

SUCK IT NOOBS BOOYAH BOOYAH BOOYAH BOOYAH BOOYAH BOOYAH BOOYAH

[Stratocratic-Anarchy Oceanic Empire]

Monkey 0, the last president of the Monkey Republic, realizes that monkeys are now out. The genocide being led by the anti-monkey forces across the universe has caused for there to be no more pure monkeys. Just him.

With his remaining troops (mostly robotic soldiers, drones, and animals) he leads his forces to the Dark Monkey capital. He captures the capital and razes it. Genociding the remaining Dark Monkeys in order to rid the dark forces.

He uses his body as a sacrifice to prevent the dark forces from spreading out across the universe due to the Dark Monkeys having conducted evasive maneuvers.

The universe reaches peace and balance. The universe is at stability.

R.I.P all the monkeys.

[-Astoria-]

Monkey -1 attempted to divide by zero.

[The Second JELLIAN Republic]

Anti monkey 2 takes a long walk off a short pier .. but in reverse ?
“Scientists baffled”

[Stratocratic-Anarchy Oceanic Empire]

Monkey -3 discovers a cave of acid. He swims in it.

Upon swimming in water he dies.

[Universil-Unoyz Wintarros]

Monkey -4 metagames and realizes all the monkeys are in an astral plane of existence. He decides to go up the walls, then down, then walks upside down on the ceiling. He realizes that there isnt even a room with walls to walk on. How am I walking exactly?

Then he gets an idea. Monkey -4 goes not forward nor back, but IN. He goes IN, getting smaller, and smaller. He sees atoms, electrons, quarks, then he sees wisps floating about. Further and further, floating bodies, lights, dots, orbs, galaxies, stars, planets, earth!

Further and further he goes, now he seems to be falling. He tries to pump the breaks but apparently he was going FTL when suddenly he CRASHES INTO EARTH AT 1000000000x THE SPEED OF LIGHT AND IS OBLITERATED

[Perikuresu]

Monkey -5 gets shat out of Perikuresu

[The Second JELLIAN Republic]

Monkey -6 collides with a bus full speed, then later very kindly has the door held open for them, then dies.

[Liberated Polinesia]

Monkey 1441 died in heroic defense of Tsaritysn

[Perikuresu]

Monkey -7 sacrificed itself to destroy Liberated Polinesia's breaking of the Monkey continuity

[Emus Republic of New Guinea]

Monkey 2, since never being told they were dead, gets dragged into the underworld by monkey -8

[Kartunesia]

Monkey -9 confused to death thinking about how in the world there is a negative amount of monkeys

[The African Emirates]

01- yeknoM was back at it again at Krispy Kreme

[Sladski]

monkey -11 found a bunker in the middle of space on a floating rock, he went inside this bunker and saw 100 monkeys, all of them the same as him, just different in colour. He released all of the monkeys by pressing a strange button and died 4 minutes later because the 100 monkeys started beating monkey -11 to death.

(normally this would mean that we jump back to monkey 88, but if you guys wanna skip it and call it non-canon then thats fine too.)

[New Kowloon Bay]

Monkey 88 is surprised at being alive again, so surprised that he jumps into oncoming traffic.

[North Cromch]

MOnkey 3 was the poison in monkey 31's burrito that got eated

Monkey α counted the posts, and this is Monkey 1.
As he wandered across Earth, (or at least, what remained of it after all the chaos) he reminisced of the deaths of each monkey.
How 9866 was killed by a mob, (specifically, Monkeys 34, 689, 818, 991, 1773, 2775, 3689 and 5479) how 9242 sent a thousand monkeys to their deaths, how 8218 exploded randomly much to the hilarity of the remaining ones, 8211's death in Leningrad, how 7873 didn't practice Kim-ism in NK, how 7863 was one of the first monkeys to revisit the cliff that 10000 fell off, 7770's death to Wilkins, 7292's exposure to oganesson, how 6603 starved in IKEA, 6489's much more mundane death, the strange death chain of monkeys 6508 to 6501, 6278's screwing over of 1200 monkeys, 5481's attempt to proselytize the Sentinelese, the death of 4637 via Titanoboa, 4525's experiment with a flammenwerfer, 4055 being killed by a Starfish Hitler, 3992's unfortunate timing in Constantinople, the deaths of 3985 to 3778, (except for 3975 and 3780) the duel between 3721 and the mechanized husk of 3725, 3581's attempt to rob a gun store, 2956's supportion of abortion in Poland, 2670 sticking beans up his nostrils, 2480 chewing 5 Gum, 2380's name being an unlucky omen, 1777 going too close to NSG, 1393's testing of Da Vinci's aircraft, 1153 stepping on a landmine, the strapping of 1000 to a firework, Monkey 797 during the final boss in Dracula X, 666's rampage, 558's lack of knowledge of spells, 483's similarities to Hitler, 420 Blaze It, 270 opening the sub hatch, 142 not carrying the negative, 62 eating both pills, 10 and 8 dying of cholera, and finally, 1's remains being snuck into 31's burrito.
Monkey α continued onwards. He had already gained immortality by an unknown means. A white void opened in front of him, and he stepped through.
He had gained enlightenment. Godhood, even.

[The African Emirates]

Monkey 0 created a logical paradox so strong that it killed all things in that particular universe, including Monkey α

[Libertalonia]

so we killed, ten thousand monkeys

What now?

[Fatatatutti]

so we killed, ten thousand monkeys

What now?

Tonight on Baking With Alphonse, Alphonse makes gingerbread monkeys.

[Sladski]

so we killed, ten thousand monkeys

What now?

simple, we either make more monkeys through a resurrection plot hook, go into the negative monkeys, or just leave the thread to CTE.

[The African Emirates]

i like me some negative monkeys

[-Astoria-]

so we killed, ten thousand monkeys

What now?

What now?

[Emus Republic of New Guinea]

.

[The Second JELLIAN Republic]

Monkey -1 meta reported something in the mod channel.
(Ninjad, but since we should probably follow the progression of numbers, each doing 1 and going negative seems to be the best as to go about it, and until, there is consensus, I’ll just do that I guess, and see if others do also)

[Emus Republic of New Guinea]

Monkey -1 meta reported something in the mod channel.
(Ninjad, but since we should probably follow the progression of numbers, each doing 1 and going negative seems to be the best as to go about it, and until, there is consensus, I’ll just do that I guess, and see if others do also)

(so, negatives?