CHANGE THE CHANNEL

[Pivnichia]

Soap Opera person 1:"You- You- YOU BETRAYED ME! How could you do this to me?!"

Soap Opera person 2:"And that's not even all.... I AM NOT YOUR HUSBAND, I AM YOUR ENEMY FROM SECOND GRADE!"

Soap Opera person 1:"You are Günter? Well this doesn't hurt me because our daughter is actually your mother, Soap Opera person 3!"

Soap Opera person 2:"WHAT? Soap Opera person 3 is my mother?"

Soap Opera person 3:"That's right and I also stabbed you!"

Soap Opera person 2:"Well I stabbed you the day before-"

*changes channel*

[Fatatatutti]

Alphonse makes fish sticks for supper. Fish goes to the store for duck sticks.

*changes channel*

[Ellbonnia]

"Unfortunately, I was unable to find Cypher under threat of death; in fact, I'm pretty sure that my firstborn son is now dead.
But along the way, I've learned many lessons, and... I think that they're worth passing on. And I think that they're worth learning for the next life.

What about you? Did you learn anything, Pixy?"

"...No."

"Can I please see my children before I die-?"

"No-"

*changes the channel*

[B o r o v a n]

"God where are the girls at?"
A minute later.
"Tesla?"
"Yes, Master Cander?" A robotic dog speaks.
"Analysis."
"I took some samples from your brain and read your emotions and cross referenced it against the environmental field along with collective data of the subjects."
"And what does that mean in English?"
"The possibility of you having an interest in a person is very low considering you're highly selective in physical attractive attributes."
"Huh."
"And that you usually prefer to not date out of your own race or age group. Or gender."
"Awww!! What a cute dog!"
"Woof!"

*changes channel*

[Wochaystein]

"God where are the girls at?"
A minute later.
"Tesla?"
"Yes, Master Cander?" A robotic dog speaks.
"Analysis."
"I took some samples from your brain and read your emotions and cross referenced it against the environmental field along with collective data of the subjects."
"And what does that mean in English?"
"The possibility of you having an interest in a person is very low considering you're highly selective in physical attractive attributes."
"Huh."
"And that you usually prefer to not date out of your own race or age group. Or gender."
"Awww!! What a cute dog!"
"Woof!"

*changes channel*

"Guys..."

"You have a machined nut."

*changes channel*

[Molopovia]

Strong and peaceful, wise and brave;
Fighting the fight for the whole world to save
We the people will ceaselessly strive
To keep our great revolution alive
Unfurl the banners, look at the screen;
Never before has such glory been seen

*changes channel*

[Cereskia]

Soiuz nevroshemny, Respublik svo-

*changes channel*

[Deblar]

Mussolini: P A S G H E T T I *crowd goes wild*
*changes channel*

[Cereskia]

Gentlemen-tle-gen-tle-gen!

Top sheesh!

HaAAÆE-

*snort* *snort *snort* *snort* *snort* *snort

Oh dear, i've made quite a meem,

MeeeeM!

Good Lord!

You F*ck like a woman!

*changes channel*

[Latin Islands]

"Climb every mounte-"

*changes channel*

[Northern Connecticut]

In other news the kardashians did-

*changes channel*

[Latin Islands]

(cue sound of breaking glass)
"Ain't no acid in this house. RAWRAWRRAAAAWWWWWR"

*changes channel*

[Northern Connecticut]

Ballgame over! Red sox win! THE RED SO-

*Changes channel*

[North Cromch]

Son, I'll cut your internet connection if you don't sto-

*le epic channel change

[Pivnichia]

Random Person 1: -the wifi password is: "ghjs9apF=aeaPAJWRinegi0üwihteg329". Did you get that?
Random Person 2: No, not quite. Could you repeat that?
Random Person 1: Should've listened-


*changes channel*

[Noristoniaka]

"BOXING TREES! The most epic boxing match now live between The Great Palm and Sharp Pi-"

*Ze changing of ze channel*

[Cereskia]

Da da, da da la la da da, VILLAGER NEWS!

We're live in three-

*changes channel*

[The Arbys Cult]

It's 'Never Gonna Give You Up' by Rick Astley

*Hastily changes channel, only to realize that the remote control's batteries have died*
No! NO!

*Rushes up to TV to change channel using the channel buttons, only to realize that the TV is new*
Ah, wait! I know!

*Rummages through the cabinets to look for batteries, all while the song is still playing loudly*
Oh, why did the last channel have to be so quiet?

*Fiddles with the remote for another minute, finally changing the channel as the song ends*

[Fatatatutti]

Fish changes his wifi password to "ghjs9apF=aeaPAJWRinegi0üwihteg329" - and immediately forgets it.

Alphonse steals ideas from other TV shows.

*changes channel*

[Novaya Equestria]

"WELCOME TO UNLONDON!"

*changes channel*

[The Arbys Cult]

"I'm about to say something that I've never said to another person in my entire life, right here on live TV. I've been waiting to say this for so long now, and it's so important to me that I've arranged for this to be a commercial-free broadcast so that you can hear what I'm about to say in its entirety. Okay, here we go." He takes a deep breath.

"WHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP AAAAAAAAGH AK AK AK AK AK AK AK AK AKAKAKAKAKAKAKAAAAAAA! Bop bop bop bop bop bop bop WHOOOOOOO! WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW! MOOOOOOOOOOO! Oink oink oink oink! Baaaaaaaaaaaaah! Woo woo woo woo woo woo—"
This keeps going, uninterrupted, for an hour.

*Changes channel*

[Asouzu]

"Dad, why do you care about what I li-"

"OF COURSE I'M SUPPOSED TO CARE! REAL MEN LISTEN TO MALAGASY POP MUS-"

*change channel*

[Octahedralia]

"I have acquired the letter H"

"Time to fly into the sun!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"

"I just obliterated North Octahedralia"

*changes channel*

[Cereskia]

Day 17 in the Village, a violent fight broke out today, we have never seen something so extreme.

*nudges cup*

*le gaspe* You moved my drink!

Sorry...

Apology accepted.

*changes channel*

[Apotagonia]

brbr DENG brbr DENG brbr DENG brbr DENG brbr DENG brbr DENG brbr DENG brbr D-

*changes channel*