CHANGE THE CHANNEL

[Fatatatutti]

"Alphonse releases the Kraken. Fish puts it back in."

*changes channel*

[Occidens Praseodymia]

#Turkmen Propaganda#

*changes channel*

[Balaslandia]

Free v bux sale
*changes channel*

[Occidens Praseodymia]

Free v bux sale
*changes channel*

https://www.nationstates.net/nation=occ ... id=1412535

*changes channel*

[Socialist States of Ludistan]

Weird grunting and moaning sounds

*changes channel*

[The Arbys Cult]

A strangely stylized Donald Trump walks up to a podium
"My fellow Americans-"
"We're not American!" shouts an angry audience member.
"Wait, what?" asks the confused president.
The audience begins booing and throwing cheese at him.
"Why is the treble clef still 7 notes, Mr. President?" asks a journalist who appears to be Barack Obama. Wait, nevermind. Everyone is Obama.

*Changes channel away from this fever dream*

*The next channel is just a live feed of Donald Trump in bed with a weird camera next to his head. Wait.*

*Changes channel away from this literal dream*

[Lincolnite States]

"The only thing we have to fear is running out of toilet paper."

*changes channel*

[Western Fardelshufflestein]

"The only thing we have to fear is running out of toilet paper."

*changes channel*

The truth has been spoken.
/Skip

[Fatatatutti]

"Alphonse make fish fingers for lunch. Fish doesn't understand the concept of fingers. Alphonse can't explain it."

*changes channel*

[Western Fardelshufflestein]

"Western Fardelshufflestein's a lumberjack, and Western Fardelshufflestein's OK--"
*Changes channel*
"NObody expects the Spanish Inquisition!"
*Changes channel*
"She turned me into a newt!
"...
"I got better."
*Is forced by some sadist to change the channel*

[The Arbys Cult]

*The sadist changes the channel to a monster truck show*

"Tonight, we'll watch The Flaming Tiger crush an optimistic 10 year-old's dreams! Following that, we're gonna slap its roof and see how much spaghetti we can shove inside of it! Afterwards, we're going to get a rare first-time glimpse of the garage where monster trucks are stored in between shows!"

*Changes channel*

[B o r o v a n]

"What's today"
"Hamburgers and tater tots. With bread and carrots and choice of milk or chocolate milk."
"I want lasagna. No. Pizza! Do you have burrito? Or nachos!"
"Lasagna is next week. Pizza is on Fridays only. Burritos are not served on lunchtime and nachos were served on Tuesday."

*changes channel*

[ArenaC]

a commercial for three legged pants

*changes channel*

[Varocia]

Russia - “Have u ever been beaten in Winter”
Napoleon - “Qui”
Germany - “Ja”
*Changes Channel*
*Shoots TV*

[Santa Selena]

...I PLAY POK-
^blasts TV with shotgun

[Fatatatutti]

a commercial for three legged pants

"Fish doesn't understand the concept of pants. Alphonse demonstrates extremely wide bellbottom pants big enough to fit over his flat feet. Fish giggles."

*changes channel*

[The Arbys Cult]

"A massive group of heavily-armed fans of the South Korean band BTS has stormed the US Capitol earlier today in what can only be called an ARMY coup-"

*Changes channel*

"I never loved you!"
"But you were the one who arranged our dates, bought me that diamond engagement ring with your life savings, denounced your family to marry me-"

*Changes channel*

"It was once believed that this ancient city was a crucial center of culture and religion for the people of this land, but new evidence suggests that it was actually just a large brothel for the nobility-"

*Changes channel*

[Carrelie]

WILL AMMON REPAIR HIS FRIENDSHIP WITH EALEDF? FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON-
*changes channel*

[SatoSere]

"It has been 3 years of a bloody war in Alsace-Lorraine. The war situation has developed not necessarily to France's advantage as the Ukrainian-sponsored 'Kalosian Provisional Government' defended their territories very well."

*changes channel*

[B o r o v a n]

"Shows cancelled now what"
"Well that is it. We did all the work bringing these singers and produce some songs for nothing"
"Ok! Next project!"
"Wait I got idea we turn these singers...into sensational pop stars!"
"You do realize they were hired to do songs for the Good Morning Show right?"
"Why not? Our TV station is running out of ideas, we'll make millions. The lead singer sings well, the black haired one is a tomboy, and the other has a knack for songwriting. It'll be a female pop band sensation. "

*changes channel*

[Fatatatutti]

"Alphonse puts the ram in the rama-lama-ding-dong. Fish takes it back out."

*changes channel*

[B o r o v a n]

A black man stands looking at the camera.
"Welcome back to Finance Savy. Here we are with the Top Seven Ways to Improve your Finances!"
Number seven!
"Every year set yourself some money to save for your retirement! Set yourself 3% to 10% of your incometo put in your 401k or invest into the stock market."
Number six!
"Finding yourself out of cash? The reason maybe you're spending too much! If you have a credit card, don't use it!"
Number five!
"If you ever go to a auto dealer, car salesmen hate this one word. Thing is the auto manufacturers pay car salesmen money each time to sell a car and they don't tell consumers to make more money of you! The key word is kickba..."
TV static.
Number four!
"Don't walk around in a car lot. The car salesmen will hunt you like a vulture seeing how you want the car leaving you weak during negotiations. Instead do your homework and know the car to buy beforehand and then walk inside telling them what you want."
Number three!
"Buy a used car! If you buy a new car you waste more money, because of making more payments to car dealerships!"
Number two!
"Invest! Stock market doubles every seven years!"
"Number one
"If you have a loan, it's best to make bigger payments rather than small as it leaves you well off in longer term. Small payments required more interest and defer the time to pay off the balance, leaving a bigger balance in the end."


*changes channel*

[B o r o v a n]

"I am in favor the of the middle class. Middle class most important. If you help the poor all the poor will ever do is buy food and clothes so they don't help reinvigorate economy. If you help the rich there's a limit on how many yachts you buy. But the middle class, you are helping them buy a home, a second car, a new laundry machine or refrigerator they are the ones that are the backbone of the economy and they are the American Dream. The middle class, they are the crown jewel of America. Janitor?"
"Yes, Mister Gomez?"
"Clean this shit up will ya? I ain't paying you minimum wage for this shit!"
"Yes Mr. Congressman."
"Where was I? Oh yes the middle class..."
Mr. Gomez then went to shoot a photo op with a white business owner.
"I want to congratulate this dude on being here with me today. Such a proud American! I get my coffee from him. You guys should buy more from small businesses like this instead of Amazon. This is a great neighborhood! No shootings! No crime! No poor people! You even have your own culture here with the beards and jeans. And good property too! Nice houses. It's a pleasant place."

*changes channel*

[Outer Acharet]

"WE'VE BEEN CLOBBERED! THE SKY OPENED UP AND ALL HAIL BROKE LOOSE! COME DOWN FOR OUR FIRST ANNUAL HAIL SALE! BUY SLIGHTLY DAMAGED CARS, TRUCKS, AND SUVS AT A DISCOUNT! LIMITED TIME O-"
*changes channel at the speed of light*

[B o r o v a n]

"Why are you a goat?" The youngest asked.
"What? never seen a goat as a book shopkeeper before?"
"Wow"
"Yes third largest bookstore in the city. You can find books that are more difficult to procure, dangerous."
"Ooh what this do?"
"Don't touch that!"
Electricity popped outta book. The keeper shut the book.
"Oops."
"No touch!"
"Keeper we need to find the Lost Artefact of Time to defeat the Darkness. Lenore is summoning dark magic to all the land."
"There are books everywhere in the bookstore. History, magic spells, fantasy, but I don't recall anything about the Lost Artefact of Time."
"Wow Sheila this bookstore has everything! History about every race, magic, everything."
Ding!
Creak!
"It's the Darkness!" The trio whispered.
"Quick! Hide!"
The trio hid and a book fall on top of the youngest.
"The book! The Lost Artefact of Time!"
"We are looking for a dangerous group of individuals. A 17 year old boy, a 15 year old girl, and a non defined 13 year old." The Darkness spoke.
"What's non defined? Is he or she transgender?"
"No"
"Then what's non defined?"
"Person who wishes to undisclose gender or does not believe he or she's in either case."
"Or maybe the author of this book was too lazy to choose a gender. But I swear they looked like a boy. But also looked female."
"What?" looking confused.
"Never mind"
"Do you know where they are?"
"I have no idea."
The Darkness then levitated the keeper in the air, choking him. "You just told me how the youngest looked like." The Darkness held him until the youngest of the trio distracted him, throwing something.
A fight then ensued, involving shots of energy between them and chucking books like maniacs for fifteen whole minutes until the Darkness chase the trio up the third floor and then slid down a stairway but the Darkness clumsily fell a staircase letting the trio escape.

*changes channel*