OOC: My friend and I decided to draft a rewrite of Clever Homo Sapiens' previous iteration of this proposal, which they agreed to through telegrams. However, it's been close to 3 weeks and they have not responded, so I've decided to post this here for additional feedback. Share your thoughts!
The Security Council,
Noting the importance of the fourth estate on many nations' operations, as their ability to timely report on issues of national importance help leaders to resolve these dilemmas before they can spiral out of control,
Astounded by the particular effort put in by the hardworking journalists of Fauxia, whose reporting of no less than a dozen issues have greatly assisted national leaders in mitigating their effects,
Admiring the efforts made by Fauxian political correspondents to improve global political literacy through their publishing of the following articles:
- “Party On, Leader!”, in which Fauxian satirists revealed that the global phenomenon known as the ‘SILLY’ political party had been making waves in general elections and encouraged national leaders to also embrace humour to spice up drab bureaucratic proceedings,
- “(A Lot of Pennies) For Your Thoughts”, in which investigative journalists from Fauxia revealed that political protestors were being paid by subversive forces seeking to undermine Zoning Proposal CWA221, Part 19, Clause F thereby ensuring that nations could take action against these insidious and corrupt actors,
- “Clasp of Controversy”, in which Fauxian photojournalists caught rude leaders red-handed in the act of refusing basic respect, prompting international dialogue on whether the vulgar gesture (or lack thereof) was intentional in addition to raising awareness over the health impacts of handshakes,
Flabbergasted at the omnipresence of Fauxian foreign correspondents at the most important of international press conferences, in which they raised public awareness of diplomatic meetings such as the infamous “Meat Meet”, a scandalous barbecue between ambassadors from strictly vegetarian nations and those from the United Federation that resulting in the ambassadors involved being grilled for their violations of laws and morals,
Saluting the continued efforts of Fauxian war correspondents, who put their lives on the line to uphold journalistic integrity and break the most important of conflict-related news - such as their publication of the article entitled “Counting Coups” which exposed bellicose capitalist regimes’ subversion of socialist states and encouraged fellow communists to defend the revolution and counter the counter-coup,
Reluctantly congratulating Fauxian crackpot conspiracy theorists, whose “Building on Sand” theory that the artificial islands constructed by Wezeltonia was for the purposes of encroaching other nations’ sovereignty proved to be right, sparking international backlash against the subversive nation and even strengthening nations’ frosty relations with Blackacre to fight a common enemy,
Grateful at Fauxian journalists’ specific devotion towards breaking down xenophobic barriers through their reporting on immigration issues, such as when they advocated for the reversal of immigration bans via the heartwarming story of a Marche Noirian in “On the Fence”, who had been cruelly separated from his family due to the prohibition,
Exalting the efforts of Fauxian pollsters in conducting the case study known as “Ask a Stupid Question”, which revealed that the examination required for immigration to be approved was so difficult that nations’ residents couldn’t answer it either, raising questions on the stringency of immigration requirements,
Appreciating the cooperation between Fauxian weather reporters, economists and food critics, who coalesced to produce "Weather Report: Not Graining in East Lebatuck", a dossier that informed leaders of East Lebatuck's famine and encouraged them to export grain to the socialist superpower and prevent millions of people from starving to death,
Understanding that in addition to their journalism, Fauxian writers have also been heavily involved in contributing to this very Assembly, with contributions such as:
- authoring SC#308 “Commend Candensia”, which recognised a nation that also excelled in reporting various issues ravaging nations to the desks of their leaders, as well as their stable leadership of The Hole To Hide In,
- co-authoring SC#355 “Repeal Condemn The Pacific”, which removed an inaccurate, antiquated condemnation, helping to boost the public image of the ancient region following its reforms,
Praising Fauxia for their lengthy tenure as a defender in the Rejected Realms Army and in The Order of The Grey Wardens, protecting several regions from harm by participating in the significant liberations of China, Liberal Democratic Union, North Africa and Indonesia Raya, as well as consistently defending hundreds of other regions from small scale raiders,
Believing that Fauxia’s hard work and commitment in whatever sphere they’ve been involved in has had a positive impact, and that the huge faux pas of not previously recognising this esteemed nation should be corrected,
Hereby commends Fauxia.
Co-authors: Thich Chau, Clever Homo Sapiens
