The World Assembly Security Council,
Observing the currently ongoing volley of nuclear missiles and warheads across the multiverse,
Mildly perturbed at the frequency of such acts of aggression, happening at suspiciously regular intervals of time, about one year apart from one another,
Concerned for the wonderful nations of the World Assembly’s wellbeing during these atomic get-togethers, which may result in a less-than-ideal situation for many of the profoundly good and moral nations residing under the governance of this organization,
Gleefully noting, however, that some notoriously evil nations get bombed into oblivion during these events, meaning that there is a compelling reason for them to join the World Assembly and start on a path towards recovery and goodness,
Celebrating the goodwill brought among several groups of nations and regions, known as “factions”, which ultimately can foster positive relations between previously isolated groups of people,
Finding the chaos arising from these events to be a generally positive recess from the mundaneness of this realm, which some have described as “stagnating”, “generally boring”, or “mind-numbingly tedious”,
Concerned, though, about the safety of the Security Council at large if any malevolent actors were to shift their warmongering focus to the building of the World Assembly, and the largely negative effects that hurling nuclear megabombs towards our esteemed Assembly would incur,
Asking, in light of this, that any nations thinking of blowing up the home of the Security Council, to not do that,
Reemphasizing the fact that it would be an objectively very bad thing if any nations were to aim their full arsenal of weapons of mass destruction at any building containing gnomish personnel of the World Assembly, even though there is no formal method in which this Assembly can retaliate with material action should that action occur,
Growing rather suspicious at the lack of demonstrable aftermath following this should-be-armageddon, and worried at the implications that such a finding would have on this realm at large,
And believing that, with all these factors combined, this so-called “N-Day” shall be remembered now and forever,
Henceforth endorses any and all activities that occur under the name of N-Day, in good jest and abject chaos.
This will be submitted when the announcement for N-Day 2021 comes out - I'm open to thoughts on it in the meantime, though. Is it too on the nose? I tried to fill it with humor, and I figured I could either go with the route of being so overly grim that it's funny, or making such light of an event that would obviously be disastrous - I went with the latter.
I will be submitting something along these lines regardless, but I'm willing and open to making pretty large changes if the consensus seems to be that. I will not be willing to sacrifice making it funny, though - if you don't think this is funny, feel free to voice that and I'll work on it. I think it's pretty clever, but I'm also a tad bit inclined to think that.
Also, once this is submitted I'll post a similar draft for Z-Day.
Feedback away!
