[PASSED] Commend Kelssek

[Crazy girl]

Commend Kelssek
Category: Commendation | Nominee: Kelssek | Proposed by: Drawkland

The Security Council,

Heralding the existence of Kelssek, a nation founded in 2004 which has contributed to many NationStates communities over the years;

Recognizing Kelssek’s contribution to international legislation in both the General Assembly and its predecessor, including:

• UN#167 “International Emergency Number”, which created a standardized telephone number for reaching emergency services;
• UN#205 “Repeal ‘UN Patent Law’”, which prevented monopolization of important medicines and inventions;
• GAR#38 “Convention Against Genocide”, which solidified the World Assembly’s stance against this heinous crime;
• GAR#57 “Refugee Protection”, which helped assist refugees fleeing from persecution; and co-authorship of
• GAR#485 “Repeal ‘Disease Naming Compact’”, which cut down on unnecessary bureaucracy within this Assembly;

Introducing Kelssek’s vast participation and hosting within the sporting spheres;

Affirming that due to the large number of entrants and activity, the difficulty and prestige of hosting a World Cup is one of the greatest honors a sporting nation can achieve;

Praising Kelssek’s forays into the World Cup Cycle, including:

• Co-hosting World Cup 46 alongside Ad’ihan, the last World Cup of the Jolt Era;
• Co-hosting Cup of Harmony 77 alongside Zwangzug, which included lending hosting help to the World Cup 85 Qualifying campaign by way of a Vilitan Plan; and
• Winning the Cup of Harmony 43 title against Whirl Islands;

Asserting that while the hosting of a World Cup is demanding, it is eclipsed by hosting the Olympic Games, which is a time-consuming and taxing undertaking that only the most skilled and trusted nations can handle, due to the thousands of entries and hundreds of events;

Emphasizing that cities within Kelssek have hosted no less than four Olympic Games, including:

• The IV Olympic Winter Games, held in the city of Alavaria;
• The Games of the V Olympiad, held in the city of Outineau;
• Co-hosting the Games of the XII Olympiad alongside Vekaiyu, by the cities of Novonaya and Provinsk; and
• The XV Olympic Winter Games, held in the city of Clayquot;

Impressed by Kelssek’s athletes achieving a top five medal tally at no less than fourteen Olympic Games at the time of writing, as well as the top medal tally at the VII Winter Olympics in Neverend, Liventia;

Recalling Kelssek’s dominance in the early history of the World Cup of Hockey, which includes the hosting of three editions (13, 20, 39), six podium appearances (5, 8, 9, 13, 14, 19), and one title (14);

Celebrating Kelssek’s other sporting success, including seven Olympic gold medals in water polo (the most in the sport), as well as back-to-back Rugby World Cup titles (11, 12);

Admiring the dedication of Kelssek in curating and contributing to sports history records, nearly singlehandedly in the NSWiki and as part of the administration team in the NationStates Sports Wiki;

Accentuating the longtime residency and diplomacy of Kelssek in The East Pacific;

Saluting Kelssek’s service in The East Pacific's regional government, especially during the crucial reformatory period following The Empire's occupation, including:

• Kelssek's part in framing the first Concordat of The East Pacific;
• Serving as Vizier from 2009 to 2013;
• Serving as Provost in the Magisterium in 2009 and 2011;
• Serving as Arbiter of the Conclave from 2011 to 2013; and
• Serving as Regional Cartographer from 2004 to 2008;

Noting their role as a mediating party in both the Listonian conflict and the Krechzianko-Vladistock War;

Observing the radio newscasts of the Kelssek Broadcasting Corporation, which kept nations aware of conflicts and resolutions throughout the region for over three years;

Concluding that a nation of such impressive contributions to the wider NationStates community should not go unrecognized;

Hereby Commends Kelssek.

Co-authored by Francois Isidore.

---

Hey there everyone! My name is Drawkland, and I've been on NS for over seven years. I've been an active participant in the NS Sports subforum for a majority of my NS tenure, and I've always wanted to get into the WA eventually. What better way to do that than to commemorate a vital contributor to the NS Sports community?

First off, I have to thank Electrum, who's basically been the "producer" for this proposal, lending guidance to me and my co-author, Francois Isidore. Both of them have been incredibly helpful in both keeping me motivated and assisting in the writing/drafting process. I can't thank them enough for having trust in me to let me take the lead in authoring this proposal.

Kelssek has been a crucial part of the NS Sports community, especially in the Olympics. Hosting the Olympics is no small feat, and doing it multiple times is already worthy of recognition. Kelssek's contributions to not only NSS but other areas of the NS community make them more than deserving to receive a commendation in my eyes. I also want to thank them, not only for their help in keeping NSS running, but for also helping verify everything in this proposal was correct.

As this is my first authoring job, I welcome and appreciate any feedback, criticism, or grammar-related fixes. Right now we're sitting at 3,873 characters, so we're in no danger of running into the character limit. Thanks, and I'm looking forward to seeing what you all think!

[Drawkland]

EDITS:
Revision 1: Restructured World Cup and Olympic listings. Minor word changes throughout. Restructure and detail added to TEP regional accolades.
Revision 2: Slight grammar edits.
Revision 3: Slight grammar edits.
Revision 4: Clarifications added to Olympic Games section regarding cities.

NOTES
- A couple people have worried that the term "Jolt Era" is a possible violation of SC rules 2a or 2b. Understandable, considering with RL context you know that Jolt refers to the old forum host. However, as far as NS Sports is concerned, "Jolt Era" is an in-character name for the epoch before the sports world expanded. OOC this was due to the move to the new forum and getting a separate subforum for sports which increased visibility and kept things orderly, but this is still used as the in-character term. This is just what we call that older era of sports, just like IRL the "Victorian Era" refers to the mid-late 1800s, or the "Antebellum Period" refers to the events between the American Revolution and American Civil War. We've already received a mod ruling that the proposal is legal (thanks Audioslavia), but I figured it was worth making a clear statement on the issue.

SOURCES:
UN#167, UN#205
GAR#38, GAR#57, GAR#485
History of NS Sports - World Cup Events
History of NS Sports - Summer and Winter Olympics
History of NS Sports - World Cup of Hockey
NS Sports Wiki
TEP Gameplay History
The Concordat of the East Pacific
TEP Magisterium Sessions
TEP Map Request Thread, v2
Cartographer's Office Thread, v2
Listonia
KBC Radio Broadcast Thread

[Outer Sparta]

First glance is that you have a good start to your proposal and the nominee has commendable characteristics and achievements.

[Westinor]

I think this proposal is fairly well done. I took a quick read and will offer more detailed criticisms later, but a few notes:

The first half is definitely strong - some of the language feels a little bland but straightforward language isn't necessarily a bad thing in an early draft.

Affirming that due to the large number of entrants and activity, the difficulty and prestige of hosting a World Cup is only surpassed by that of the Olympics;

The way this is ordered feels a little bit weird. Perhaps re-organize the clause to be more of a "the difficulty and prestige of hosting a World Cup is great due to the large number of entrants and activity, which is only surpassed by that of the Olympics" (not actual language suggestion, just in terms of sentence structure) since right now the sentence is revolving more around the fact that the work of hosting or co-hosting a World Cup surpassed by the Olympics rather than the actual difficulty of hosting a World Cup itself. That sort of makes for an awkward transition, where it downplays the achievement of having hosted World Cup as opposed to noting its difficulty next to that of hosting the Olympics.

Recalling Kelssek’s participation in the World Cup of Hockey, which includes the hosting of three editions (13, 20, 39), six podium appearances (5, 8, 9, 13, 14, 19), and one title (14);

I think "participation" is a bit weak, especially since you put out their achievements in Hockey as opposed to grouping it with "other sports successes". I'm not super familiar with Sports, so I may be incorrect in some of my points (disclaimer for this whole thing ) but if this is being singled out, perhaps note why you're singling this out. If this is a dominant record or if they were a monumental figure in Hockey in particular, note that!

Accentuating the longtime residency and diplomacy of Kelssek in The East Pacific;
Noting their role as a mediating party in both the Listonian conflict and the Krechzianko-Vladistock War;

So, a few things about this section - they way it's ordered, which is a bit different from the more listed form of the first half, is a bit confusing. I'm assuming this (and the next?) clause are referring to roleplay, but the introductory clause for the section makes me think it'll be about more Gameplay-related accomplishments, which are noted later on. I'd suggest distinguishing between the two - perhaps move the regional achievements to the top of this clause, and/or create a separate clause for the roleplay related achievements (if those are roleplay. I hope this isn't an egregious misinterpretation xD). On the other hand, you could also note international achievements, and have that be the header for a separate clause OR just slap "international and region-wide achievements in the areas of diplomacy and region-building" or similar on there to group both roleplaying (which feels more nation-to-nation) and TEP region-building into one area.

That's all I've got for now ^-^ but just a few quick suggestions. This is a great first draft for this proposal! Best of luck.

[Honeydewistania]

This is a very good nominee and a good draft. One comment though: I’m not sure if including the phone line resolution in the resolution is a good idea. When the UN got annihilated, no one replaced that resolution in any shape or form until a few months ago, when the idea was quickly shot down.

[Tinhampton]

This is a very good nominee and a good draft. One comment though: I’m not sure if including the phone line resolution in the resolution is a good idea. When the UN got annihilated, no one replaced that resolution in any shape or form until a few months ago, when the idea was quickly shot down.

Greater Cesnica never abandoned International Emergency Phone Line.

Support in principle but this is somehow both too fluffy in some places and too bare-bones in others, may leave feedback later

[ENvIrM]

Finally, a good Security Council Resolution!

[Ceni]

Full support. As a former Olympics host, I can personally attest that hosting one is OOCly is a massive undertaking. Hosting multiple... well, it's a blessing that Kelssek is still around in the community.

A minor suggestion, if I may: I would suggest switching the order of the sections on the World Cup and the Olympics. Talk about the WC first, then the transition into the Olympics section will be a lot less awkward than it is.

[Graintfjall]

The answer is probably yes, but did you definitely check with Kelssek (who opposed the introduction of the SC) that he actually wants this?

and I've always wanted to get into the WA eventually. What better way...

By doing something in the WA.

[Indusse]

Since I have been around with Sports Roleplaying, I really appreciate the commendation of Kelssek. All the best on this.

[Drawkland]

The answer is probably yes, but did you definitely check with Kelssek (who opposed the introduction of the SC) that he actually wants this?

Yes, I have contacted Kelssek and they were both grateful and helped verify the accuracy of the proposal. If Kelssek had an opposition to being commended by the SC then they did not raise that concern with me.

This is a very good nominee and a good draft. One comment though: I’m not sure if including the phone line resolution in the resolution is a good idea. When the UN got annihilated, no one replaced that resolution in any shape or form until a few months ago, when the idea was quickly shot down.

Thank you. I included all the resolutions that Kelssek wrote, to ensure the proposal had a complete list of accomplishments at the time of writing. If there seems to be a larger backlash against UN#167's inclusion in the text I will remove it.

The way this is ordered feels a little bit weird. Perhaps re-organize the clause to be more of a "the difficulty and prestige of hosting a World Cup is great due to the large number of entrants and activity, which is only surpassed by that of the Olympics" (not actual language suggestion, just in terms of sentence structure) since right now the sentence is revolving more around the fact that the work of hosting or co-hosting a World Cup surpassed by the Olympics rather than the actual difficulty of hosting a World Cup itself. That sort of makes for an awkward transition, where it downplays the achievement of having hosted World Cup as opposed to noting its difficulty next to that of hosting the Olympics.

A minor suggestion, if I may: I would suggest switching the order of the sections on the World Cup and the Olympics. Talk about the WC first, then the transition into the Olympics section will be a lot less awkward than it is.

These are both very good points, and I agree with both of you. I have edited the draft to switch the World Cup resume to be listed before the Olympics, as well as modifying some wording so it flows better in that order. I probably should've done that in the first place, but this definitely helps.

I think "participation" is a bit weak, especially since you put out their achievements in Hockey as opposed to grouping it with "other sports successes". I'm not super familiar with Sports, so I may be incorrect in some of my points (disclaimer for this whole thing ) but if this is being singled out, perhaps note why you're singling this out. If this is a dominant record or if they were a monumental figure in Hockey in particular, note that!

You're correct here as well, and I think this plays into the bland language note you made earlier as well. That clause has been slightly modified to better reflect Kelssek's importance to the early days of the WCoH.

Accentuating the longtime residency and diplomacy of Kelssek in The East Pacific;
Noting their role as a mediating party in both the Listonian conflict and the Krechzianko-Vladistock War;

So, a few things about this section - they way it's ordered, which is a bit different from the more listed form of the first half, is a bit confusing. I'm assuming this (and the next?) clause are referring to roleplay, but the introductory clause for the section makes me think it'll be about more Gameplay-related accomplishments, which are noted later on. I'd suggest distinguishing between the two - perhaps move the regional achievements to the top of this clause, and/or create a separate clause for the roleplay related achievements (if those are roleplay. I hope this isn't an egregious misinterpretation xD). On the other hand, you could also note international achievements, and have that be the header for a separate clause OR just slap "international and region-wide achievements in the areas of diplomacy and region-building" or similar on there to group both roleplaying (which feels more nation-to-nation) and TEP region-building into one area.

I can see what you mean about the ambiguous structure of this section. The region the roleplaying achievements are listed alongside the gameplay achievements is that the roleplay events were all regional-based. It's meant to be a section outlining their tenure in TEP as a whole, both in GP and RP terms. However, I feel like it could use a tune-up, so I have restructured and fleshed out this section a little bit as well.

I'd like to thank everyone so far for leaving helpful comments.

[Bhang Bhang Duc]

So nice to get another well written first time draft. Looks nicely detailed and presented on my first quick look. I'll try and leave some more detailed feedback later.

[Kelssek]

I'd like to thank the drafters for their efforts, and I'm very grateful that I was considered worthy of a commendation. For full disclosure, I was contacted to ask if I would accept one before the drafting was started, and I said yes, and then more recently I was asked for contacts in the different areas I participated, then provided a draft and given the chance to add anything that I felt should be highlighted. I think this is a good process to follow.

While it's true I had concerns about the introduction of commend and condemn at the beginning, when the idea was to have everything in one chamber, I think with hindsight, putting them along with other raiding/defending-relevant features into the Security Council has worked out well.

Not that I'm claiming credit for the Security Council's existence, of course

Just a couple of style things, in the Asserting... clause the G in "Olympic Games" should be capitalized (it is a proper noun), and further down, "Water Polo" should not be capitalized (it's not a proper noun just as "association football" and "ice hockey" are not)

[Drawkland]

Thank you for helping with everything, Kelssek! I've also made the capitalization changes, thanks for the catch.

[Drawkland]

We'll be looking to submit this proposal to the queue soon. I'd love some more feedback for this to make sure it's in the best possible shape, but if we don't get anything in the next day or so we'll start gearing up to submit and get a campaign going.

[Tinhampton]

protip: most first-time authors do not usually submit their proposals after about five days

[Francois Isidore]

protip: most first-time authors do not usually submit their proposals after about five days

Protip: The draft was refined well before we posted it here after months of research and wording tweaks. The Security Council’s queue is currently wide open, and Drawk has done a great job of responding to constructive criticism and listening to feedback by making a few necessary changes to the current draft.

I see no reason as to why, given the three days of inactivity in this thread before I prompted them to bump it, this proposal would need to prolong it’s drafting period simply for the sake of doing so when we’ve prioritized getting it right the first time around before it was even introduced here on the forums.

But hey, that’s just me ( << Not a first-time author, nor a first-time co-author )

[Outer Sparta]

We'll be looking to submit this proposal to the queue soon. I'd love some more feedback for this to make sure it's in the best possible shape, but if we don't get anything in the next day or so we'll start gearing up to submit and get a campaign going.

I would recommend to wait a week just in case if someone else has any further feedback or whatnot.

[Tinhampton]

Saluting Kelssek’s service in The East Pacific's regional government, especially during the crucial reformatory period following The Empire's occupation, including:

• Kelssek's part in framing the first Concordat of The East Pacific;
• Serving as Vizier from 2009 to 2013;
• Serving as Provost in the Magisterium in 2009 and 2011;
• Serving as Arbiter of the Conclave from 2011 to 2013;
• Serving as Regional Cartographer from 2004 to 2008;

And what exactly did they do in those posts?

[Electrum]

I wholeheartedly endorse this resolution. Kelssek is a well deserved candidate for commendation. Kelssek's been instrumental in advancing human rights in the World Assembly, with two of its resolutions, the 'Convention Against Genocide' and 'Refugee Protection', forming an integral part of WA/GA law. Hosting four Olympic games also shows an insane amount of dedication -- I can attest to how difficult this achievement is -- many dozens of hours over a short period of time goes into hosting one of these, let alone four of them.

[Outer Sparta]

I wholeheartedly endorse this resolution. Kelssek is a well deserved candidate for commendation. Kelssek's been instrumental in advancing human rights in the World Assembly, with two of its resolutions, the 'Convention Against Genocide' and 'Refugee Protection', forming an integral part of WA/GA law. Hosting four Olympic games also shows an insane amount of dedication -- I can attest to how difficult this achievement is -- many dozens of hours over a short period of time goes into hosting one of these, let alone four of them.

And who better to write a resolution commending their achievements than a veteran in the NS Sports community? I can't think of any other feedback to add myself and will definitely vote for if it gets to a vote.

[Goobergunchia]

We are pleased to see a proposal of this quality before this Council and will happily urge support for the same when it is formally submitted.

My staff has noted one very minor grammatical point: in the first two lists the penultimate entry has an "and" following the semicolon, while there is no similarly situated "and" in the final two lists.

[Lord] Michael Evif
Goobergunchian WA Ambassador

[PotatoFarmers]

I saw the proposal some time back, and while I really wanted to take a detailed look at it, I didn't have the time to look at it all in one go, so I only could get to it now.

First of all, I was thinking if the order of the achievements in NSS could be reordered to produce get a nicer flow (and possibly more concise points?) Maybe the Football World Cup and the World Cup of Hockey (WCoH) could come together, since they, after all, are big events for their respective sports. And there is a relatively huge community for both sports, based on my understanding thus far. And then transit to the part about Olympics hosting, which is supposed to be the biggest event comprising of MULTIPLE sports (which, btw, for people who don't know, is such a ridiculous administrative task imo. I can't simply comprehend how every entry is processed, checked, and a whole lot of sports results are being generated, while tabulating RP bonuses, etc. etc.)

I am not very experienced with SC stuff per se, but rather than merely stating Kel's positions in TEP, maybe there could be some points describing the contributions made? Personally, I don't like just merely stating names of positions which may be foreign to people who do not know how things work in TEP. I know you are working with a tight character count. But I would prefer one or two contributions, like the one about the framing of the Concordat, than a basket list of positions.

Fwiw, Kelssek really deserves commendation for the work they have been doing over these years, whether it is in regional government in the past, or NSS in recent years. I would gladly vote for it if anything.

[Drawkland]

We are pleased to see a proposal of this quality before this Council and will happily urge support for the same when it is formally submitted.

My staff has noted one very minor grammatical point: in the first two lists the penultimate entry has an "and" following the semicolon, while there is no similarly situated "and" in the final two lists.

[Lord] Michael Evif
Goobergunchian WA Ambassador

Thank you! We're excited to aim this proposal for submission soon.

The grammatical error has been noted and fixed. Thanks for the catch.

Saluting Kelssek’s service in The East Pacific's regional government, especially during the crucial reformatory period following The Empire's occupation, including:

• Kelssek's part in framing the first Concordat of The East Pacific;
• Serving as Vizier from 2009 to 2013;
• Serving as Provost in the Magisterium in 2009 and 2011;
• Serving as Arbiter of the Conclave from 2011 to 2013;
• Serving as Regional Cartographer from 2004 to 2008;

And what exactly did they do in those posts?

I am not very experienced with SC stuff per se, but rather than merely stating Kel's positions in TEP, maybe there could be some points describing the contributions made? Personally, I don't like just merely stating names of positions which may be foreign to people who do not know how things work in TEP. I know you are working with a tight character count. But I would prefer one or two contributions, like the one about the framing of the Concordat, than a basket list of positions.

These positions in TEP are essentially council positions where Kelssek served alongside several other important regional members. During their tenure, lots of legislation was passed, regional government nominations were accepted or denied. It was a lot of general work done to advance the region following a period when TEP was under occupation. Listing everything that was done while Kelssek served in these positions would be much too long (and in some cases, too miscellaneous) to fit on a resolution.

I may look back through their Magisterium sessions and see if I can find any more landmark actions that were done while Kelssek was involved. The most important one was the Concordat, which is why that's already listed.

First of all, I was thinking if the order of the achievements in NSS could be reordered to produce get a nicer flow (and possibly more concise points?) Maybe the Football World Cup and the World Cup of Hockey (WCoH) could come together, since they, after all, are big events for their respective sports. And there is a relatively huge community for both sports, based on my understanding thus far. And then transit to the part about Olympics hosting, which is supposed to be the biggest event comprising of MULTIPLE sports (which, btw, for people who don't know, is such a ridiculous administrative task imo. I can't simply comprehend how every entry is processed, checked, and a whole lot of sports results are being generated, while tabulating RP bonuses, etc. etc.)

We've already reordered the NS Sports section a little bit. Putting the World Cup before the Olympics was intentional, as it was easier to verbalize the fact that hosting the World Cup is important, but hosting the Olympics is an even bigger deal. The WCoH and other sports achievements were listed later since I view them as more "miscellaneous" achievements compared to the behemoths that are the WC and Olympics, but still important parts of Kelssek's sporting history.

The World Cup of Hockey is a major event, and Kelssek was a big part of its early history. It was arguably the biggest non-soccer sport on NS for awhile, but it's nothing compared to the World Cup cycle. I think the flow of "World Cup is big, but Olympics are even bigger" would be disrupted by putting notes about other sports between them. This isn't the reject the notion of reordering the sports section, but I'm pretty confident with the order as it stands right now.

[Yelda]

I'm unfamiliar with Kelssek's role in NS sports, but I am very familiar with his role in the GA and the NSUN before that. We didn't really agree at all on trade policy,....but that's okay.

A great player who is deserving of commendation. Full support for this.