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[paused] Commend Ariusgrad

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Free Azell
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[paused] Commend Ariusgrad

Postby Free Azell » Sat Feb 27, 2021 10:24 am

Draft 1:
The Security Council,

Acknowledging that the region Philippines has, for most of its history, existed without a founder and is extremely vulnerable to invasion by foreign armies and that the sustained protection of such a region without a password requires a lot of work and dedication,

Recognizing that Ariusgrad has made painstaking efforts into protecting their region Philippines since their first election to the position of World Assembly delegate of the region in 31st January 2012, and has remained the longest serving representative of the region to this body in the midst of internal conflict and external threats, not only ensuring that the voice of similar medium-sized regions are heard in the global stage but also providing crucial security for the region and its allies.

Noting almost 9 years of unparalleled service of Ariusgradto Philippines as its President, encouraging active participation of its residents in regional and global affairs,

Further Noting that Ariusgrad introduced to Philippinesat least 11 new government capacities within a constitutional democratic setup, including the Vice Delegate (Vice President), the Communications Officer (Minister of Foreign Affairs), the Homeland Officer (Minister of Domestic Affairs), and the Security Officer (Minister of Defense) as a commitment towards efficient and effective service within and outside the region the creation of a legislative body in the form of the Regional Congress, which by so doing has ensured the promotion of inclusive and sustainable development for its members and allies. By doing this it has ensured smooth running of the region and prevention of the region from being taken by outside forces.Ariusgrad's initiatives to continually engage members through promotion of roleplaying, mapmaking, and similar activities such as the Philippine Olympics and the Philippine Basketball Association.

Praising Ariusgrad’s leadership in bringingPhilippines to new heights and allowing it to thrive, presiding over the region at its highest population of 177 nations in 2017 and ensuring a continued active World Assembly member nation population, likely the result of Ariusgrad’s unwavering efforts in recruiting new nations for the region,

Awestruck by the conduct of defense operations to defeat the 2017 Christmas Invasion, which involved organizing a massive 14-region coalition that included The South Pacific The East Pacific, TITO, The Order of Grey Wardens, among others, to expel more than 70 invader nations from the Black Hawks, the Roman Empire, and the Imperium of Angia Germania, providing lessons for future military strategists on the principles of cross-endorsement, influence piling, and coalition-building as observed in a large-scale setup.

Admiring the fact that they quickly and effectively safeguarded the region from at least 30 invasion attempts during their administration of Philippines, including at least four that had a total of over 40 invading nations. These included:

- 3rd July 2017: Invasion by Den and The Black Hawks that put Defense Minister Jose Maria Sison as Delegate briefly till defenders from Yggdrasil assisted local defense and placed Ariusgrad back as Delegate the next update. A larger invasion with 50 raiders was thwarted later, on 22nd July. Meanwhile, Sison would cause trouble for the region and its defender allies in September to October of 2017.

- 17th December 2017: The "Christmas Invasion" involving more than 70 raiders from The Black Hawks, The Roman Empire, and The Imperium of Agia Germania quashed by a 14-region defender coalition assisting the Philippines. The said coalition included The South Pacific The East Pacific, Texas, The Rejected Realms, The Order of the Grey Wardens, The Union of Democratic States, Caer Sidi, Lily, Spiritus, 10000 Islands, The Guards (Shinka), Renegade Islands Alliance,andForce.

- 24th March 2018: An invasion led by South Eastern Ossetia from Lazarus, along with The West Pacific, Unknown, and The Roman Empire was thwarted by the coalition of defenders that[ nation]Ariusgrad[/nation] had assembled through years of extensive foreign relations work.

- 12th November 2018: An invasion byThe Black Hawks, Europeia, Balder, and The Land of Kings and Emperors was defeated even with a total of 50 raiders in the operation. The defender coalition included 10000 Islands, The Order of the Grey Wardens, The Guards (Shinka), Spear Danes, and The Galactic Empire of Great Britain.

Applauding Ariusgrad’s diplomatic prowess, as they helped their region create and maintain warm relations with major regions such as 10000 Islands, The Rejected Realms, The Order of the Grey Wardens, Cape of Good Hope, Spear Danes, Founderless, [region[Force[/region], St Abbaddon, Conch Kingdom, and Spiritus, as well as closely coordinating and working with a number of them in multiple liberation missions. In keeping the region from having to be password protected or liberated, Ariusgrad is a role model to all.

Grateful for Ariusgrad's continuing programs to implement defense praxis and reinforce security from the regional to the global scale in promotion of ready power for peace, taking proactive steps to keep Philippines a stable and growing founderless region, including:

- The formation of the Philippine Defense Force to formalize the military organization already honed by years of Ariusgrad's administration, whose primary purpose is to closely coordinate local defense and cooperate with allies to ensure the protection of the region from outside threats. This force is led by Ariusgrad as its commander-in-chief.

- The maintenance of important links with defender networks to sustain regional defense and to actively participate in extra-regional missions for freedom and peace, including notable operations in known allies such as Japan,]Singapore, Belgium, Iran, Syria, Asia,Katipunan, Angvar Region of Reunited Muslim States (now United Empire of Islam), and ASEAN (now Association of Southeast Asian Nations).

Respecting Ariusgrad’s prolific work in maintaining a strong interregional standing for Philippines, by negotiating the region’s entry into the inter-regional alliance URA, an alliance of over 30 independent regions dedicated to World Assembly matters and inter-regional peace.

Admiring Ariusgrad's initiatives to embrace the emerging Filipino community in NationStates through the facilitation of mergers with similarly Filipino-themed regions, as well as creating the Philippine Council of Affiliated Regions and Institutions (PCARI) to maintain a closely-knit network with Filipino-themed regions and institutions which opt to remain independent of the Philippines

Believing that Ariusgrad is a perfect role model that the nations of this assembly should emulate, due to their passionate individual participation, interregional relations, inclusiveness, openness, and democratization in this decade which has made the world a better place for all,

Hereby commends Ariusgrad.

Co-authored by[nation] Lanaograd[/nation



Draft 2:

The Security Council,

Acknowledging that the region Philippines has, for most of its history, existed without a founder and is extremely vulnerable to invasion by foreign armies and that the sustained protection of such a region without a password requires a lot of work and dedication,

Recognizing that Ariusgrad has made painstaking efforts into protecting their region Philippines since their first election to the position of World Assembly delegate of the region on 31st January 2012, and has remained the longest-serving representative of the region to this body amid internal conflict and external threats,

Noting almost 9 years of unparalleled service of Ariusgrad to Philippines as its President, encouraging active participation of its residents in regional and global affairs,

Further Noting that Ariusgrad introduced to Philippines several new government capacities, including the creation of a legislative body in the form of the 5-member Regional Congress, within a constitutional democratic setup, as a commitment towards efficient and effective service within and outside the region, and ensures the promotion of inclusive and sustainable development for its members and allies. Ariusgrad's initiatives to continually engage members through promotion of roleplaying, mapmaking, and similar activities such as the Philippine Olympics.

Praising Ariusgrad’s leadership in bringing Philippines to new heights and allowing it to thrive, presiding over the region at its highest population of 177 nations in 2017 and ensuring a continued active World Assembly member nation population, likely the result of Ariusgrad’s unwavering efforts in recruiting new nations for the region,

Awestruck by the conduct of defense operations to defeat the 2017 Christmas Invasion, which involved organizing a massive 14-region coalition that included The South Pacific The East Pacific, TITO, The Order of Grey Wardens, among others, to expel more than 70 invader nations from the Black Hawks, the Roman Empire, and the Imperium of Angia Germania, providing lessons for future military strategists on the principles of cross-endorsement, influence piling, and coalition-building as observed in a large-scale setup.

Admiring the fact that they quickly and effectively safeguarded the region from at least 30 invasion attempts during their administration of Philippines, including at least four that had a total of over 40 invading nations. These included:

- 3rd July 2017: Invasion by Den and TBH that put Defense Minister Jose Maria Sison as Delegate briefly till defenders from Yggdrasil assisted local defense and placed Ariusgrad back as Delegate the next update. A larger invasion with 50 raiders was thwarted later, on 22nd July. Meanwhile, Sison would cause trouble for the region and its defender allies from September to October of 2017.

- 17th December 2017: The "Christmas Invasion" involving more than 70 raiders from The Black Hawks,The Roman Empire, and The Imperium of Agia Germania quashed by a 14-region defender coalition assisting the Philippines. The said coalition included TSP,TEP, Texas,The Rejected Realms,Grey Wardens, The Union of Democratic States, Caer Sidi, Lily, Spiritus, 10000 Islands, The Guards (Shinka), Renegade Islands Alliance,and Force.

- 24th March 2018: An invasion led by South Eastern Ossetia from Lazarus, along with The West Pacific, Unknown, and The Roman Empire was thwarted by the coalition of defenders that Ariusgrad had assembled through years of extensive foreign relations work.

- 12th November 2018: An invasion by TBH, Europeia, Balder, and The Land of Kings and Emperors was defeated even with a total of 50 raiders in the operation. The defender coalition included 10000 Islands, The Order of the Grey Wardens, The Guards(Shinka), Spear Danes, and The Galactic Empire of Great Britain.

Applauding Ariusgrad’s diplomatic prowess, as they helped their region create and maintain warm relations with major regions such as 10KI, TRR, Grey Wardens, Cape of Good Hope, Spear Danes Founderless, Force, St Abbaddon,Conch Kingdom, and Spiritus, as well as closely coordinating and working with a number of them in multiple liberation missions. In keeping the region from having to be password protected or liberated, Ariusgrad is a role model to all.

Grateful for Ariusgrad's continuing programs to implement defense praxis and reinforce security from the regional to the global scale in promotion of ready power for peace, taking proactive steps to keep Philippines a stable and growing founderless region, including:

- The formation of the Philippine Defense Force to formalize the military organization already honed by years of Ariusgrad's administration, whose primary purpose is to closely coordinate local defense and cooperate with allies to ensure the protection of the region from outside threats. This force is led by Ariusgrad as its commander-in-chief.

- The maintenance of important links with defender networks to sustain regional defense and to actively participate in extra-regional missions for freedom and peace, including notable operations in known allies such as Japan,Singapore, Belgium, Iran, Syria, Asia,Katipunan, Angvar Region of Reunited Muslim States (now United Empire of Islam), and ASEAN (now Association of Southeast Asian Nations).

Respecting Ariusgrad’s prolific work in maintaining a strong interregional standing for Philippines, by negotiating the region’s entry into the inter-regional alliance URA, an alliance of over 30 independent regions dedicated to World Assembly matters and inter-regional peace.

Admiring Ariusgrad's initiatives to embrace the emerging Filipino community in NationStates through the facilitation of mergers with similarly Filipino-themed regions, as well as creating the Philippine Council of Affiliated Regions and Institutions (PCARI) to maintain a closely-knit network with Filipino-themed regions and institutions which opt to remain independent of the Philippines

Believing that Ariusgrad is a perfect role model that the nations of this assembly should emulate, due to their passionate individual participation, interregional relations, inclusiveness, openness, and democratization in this decade which has made the world a better place for all,

Hereby commends Ariusgrad.

Co-authored by Lanaograd


Draft Three

The Security Council,

Acknowledging that the region Philippines existed without a founder for most of its history, requiring a great deal of effort to protect the vulnerable region from invasions,

Noting the 9 years of unparalleled service by Ariusgrad to Philippines as its President and Delegate through both internal and external conflict, all while encouraging the active participation of its residents in regional and global affairs,

Further noting the accomplishments of Ariusgrad in Philippines to promote inclusiveness and sustainable development including
  • the establishment of the Regional Congress as a legislative body,
  • the creation of an effective civil service through new positions such as the Communications Officer and Security Officer,
  • the promotion of cultural events in roleplay, map-making, the Philippine Olympics, and the Philippine Basketball Association,

Praising Ariusgrad’s leadership in bringing Philippines to new heights through dedicated recruitment, presiding over the region at its highest population of 177 nations in 2017, doubling the regional population over a five-year period, and developing an active World Assembly member population,

Admiring the work undertaken by Ariusgrad to safeguard the region from at least 30 invasion attempts during their administration, providing lessons to current and former government leaders on military principles such as cross-endorsement, influence piling, and coalition-building observable in a large-scale setup. These invasions include:

- 3rd July 2017: Invasion by Den and TBH that put Defense Minister Jose Maria Sison as Delegate briefly till defenders from Yggdrasil assisted local defense and placed Ariusgrad back as Delegate the next update. A larger invasion with 50 raiders was thwarted later, on 22nd July.

- 17th December 2017: The "Christmas Invasion" involving more than 70 raiders from The Black Hawks,The Roman Empire, and The Imperium of Agia Germania quashed by a 14-region defender coalition assisting the Philippines. The said coalition included TSP, TEP, Texas, The Rejected Realms,Grey Wardens, The Union of Democratic States, Caer Sidi, Lily, Spiritus, 10000 Islands, The Guards (Shinka), Renegade Islands Alliance, Aenaroth and Force.

- 24th March 2018: An invasion led by South Eastern Ossetia from Lazarus, along with The West Pacific, Unknown, and The Roman Empire was thwarted by the coalition of defenders that Ariusgrad had assembled through years of extensive foreign relations work.

- 12th November 2018: An invasion by TBH, Europeia, Balder, and The Land of Kings and Emperors was defeated even with a total of 50 raiders in the operation. The defender coalition included 10000 Islands, The Order of the Grey Wardens, The Guards(Shinka), Spear Danes, and The Galactic Empire of Great Britain.

Applauding Ariusgrad's diplomatic prowess in maintaining fruitful relations with key allies as a voice to the world for small- and medium-sized regions, while further actively supporting the inter-regional alliance URA,

Grateful for Ariusgrad's programs to implement defense praxis and reinforce security, keeping Philippines a secure founderless region without password protection, which includes:

- The formation of the Philippine Defense Force to formalize the military organization already honed by years of Ariusgrad's administration, with a primary objective to coordinate local defense and cooperate with allies to protect the region from invasion,

- Maintaining connections with important defender networks, participating in notable operations in allied regions such as Japan, Singapore, Belgium, Iran, Syria, Asia, Katipunan, Angvar, United Empire of Islam, and Association of Southeast Asian Nations.

Admiring Ariusgrad's contributions to the Filipino community, through initiatives in the Philippine Council of Affiliated Regions and Institutions (PCARI) to maintain a closely-knit network of independent themed regions and institutions,

Hereby commends Ariusgrad.

Co-authored by Lanaograd


Draft 4:

The Security Council,

Acknowledging that for most of Philippines’ history, the founderless region has been open to invasion, devastation, and instability, and further acknowledging that for such a vulnerable region to emerge on the global stage requires utmost dedication and robust regional protection,

Recognizing the 9 years of unparalleled service and skilled leadership by Ariusgrad for Philippines during their tenure as President and World Assembly Delegate, where they resolved internal and external conflicts, encouraged the active participation of its residents in world affairs, and became a voice for the cause of small- and medium-sized regions in the international arena,

Grateful for Ariusgrad's programs to implement defense praxis and reinforce security, keeping Philippines a secure founderless region without password protection, which includes:
  • The formation of the Philippine Defense Force to formalize the military organization already honed by years of Ariusgrad's administration, aiming for local defense cooperation and joint liberation operations on a global scale,
  • Maintaining connections with important defender networks, and participating in notable defense operations for allied regions such as Japan, Singapore, Belgium, Iran, Syria, Asia, Katipunan, Angvar, United Empire of Islam, and Association of Southeast Asian Nations.

Noting the work undertaken by Ariusgrad to safeguard the region from at least 30 invasion attempts during their administration, providing lessons to current and former government leaders on military principles such as cross-endorsement, influence piling, and coalition-building observable in a large-scale setup. These invasions include:
  • 3rd July 2017: Invasion by DEN and TBH that put Defense Minister Jose Maria Sison as Delegate briefly till defenders from Yggdrasil assisted local defense and placed Ariusgrad back as Delegate the next update. A larger invasion with 50 raiders was thwarted later, on 22nd July.
  • 17th December 2017: The "Christmas Invasion" involving more than 70 raiders from The Black Hawks, The Roman Empire, and The Imperium of Agia Germania quashed by a 14-region defender coalition assisting the Philippines. The said coalition included TSP, TEP, Texas, The Rejected Realms, Grey Wardens, The Union of Democratic States, Caer Sidi, Lily, Spiritus, 10000 Islands, The Guards, Renegade Islands Alliance, Aenaroth, and Force.
  • 24th March 2018: An invasion led by South Eastern Ossetia from Lazarus, along with The West Pacific, Unknown, and The Roman Empire was thwarted by the coalition of defenders that Ariusgrad had assembled through years of extensive foreign relations work.
  • 12th November 2018: An invasion by TBH, Europeia, Balder, and The Land of Kings and Emperors was defeated even with a total of 50 raiders in the operation. The defender coalition included 10000 Islands, The Order of the Grey Wardens, The Guards, Spear Danes, and The Galactic Empire of Great Britain,

Admiring Ariusgrad for their diplomatic prowess and devotion to improving interregional cooperation, such as their formation of the Philippine Council of Affiliated Regions and Institutions which connected together organizations similar themes with Philippines, as well as their active support for URA, of which the Philippines has one of the leading roles in the alliance,

Praising Ariusgrad’s dedication to building a caring and sharing community for Philippines through recruitment and internal development, which doubled the regional population over a five-year period, maintaining over 100 nations in the past year alone, and cultivated active World Assembly membership,

Admiring the numerous accomplishments of Ariusgrad in Philippines which have promoted inclusiveness and sustainable development, such as:
  • the establishment of the Regional Congress as a legislative body, ensuring that regional residents’ grievances could be heard,
  • the creation of an effective and efficient civil service through new positions such as the Communications Officer and Security Officer,
  • the promotion of significant events and activities within the region such as the Philippine Olympics and the Philippines Basketball Association, which have greatly contributed to regional culture,

Believing that Ariusgrad’s tenacity and magnanimity have ensured that their region Philippines continues to thrive despite uncertain circumstances and that they serve as an excellent role model to leaders of any region,

Hereby commends Ariusgrad.

Co-authored by Lanaograd.
Last edited by Free Azell on Mon Mar 22, 2021 6:35 pm, edited 7 times in total.

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Tinhampton
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Postby Tinhampton » Sat Feb 27, 2021 10:38 am

Some short observations:
  1. "Philippinessince" (in the RECOGNISING clause) and "Ariusgradto" (in the NOTING clause) both have missing spaces. There areplenty of other missing spaces and broken tags in your text but I can't be bothered to look through all of them P:
  2. Neither Founderless nor its spiritual forebear, the FRA, existed at the time of Philippines' Christmas 2017 liberation.
  3. nice humblebrag(s) lol :P
  4. Your proposal is a whopping 8,500 characters long, which I think is even worse than Crazybloxian Empire's attempt to regulate corporal punishment a few years ago! That's going to be a lot of trimming - for starters, you mention the Yuletide invasion/defence twice
  5. How has Lanaograd helped with this?
Last edited by Tinhampton on Sat Feb 27, 2021 10:40 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Free Azell
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Postby Free Azell » Sat Feb 27, 2021 10:42 am

I must of missed those space errors fixing them. It is long I knew trimming was going to be needed. Thanks though for the feedback!

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Outer Sparta
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Postby Outer Sparta » Sat Feb 27, 2021 11:12 am

Free Azell wrote:I must of missed those space errors fixing them. It is long I knew trimming was going to be needed. Thanks though for the feedback!

You have done quite a bit of research about your nominee, but as Tin already said, you have a lot of words in your draft! I recommend trimming the superfluous parts and focus on the most important achievements Ariusgrad has done. Good start so far.
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Aynia in Sunglasses
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Postby Aynia in Sunglasses » Sat Feb 27, 2021 1:39 pm

Recognizing that Ariusgrad has made painstaking efforts into protecting their region Philippines since their first election to the position of World Assembly delegate of the region in 31st January 2012, and has remained the longest serving representative of the region to this body in the midst of internal conflict and external threats, not only ensuring that the voice of similar medium-sized regions are heard in the global stage but also providing crucial security for the region and its allies.

Noting almost 9 years of unparalleled service of Ariusgradto Philippines as its President, encouraging active participation of its residents in regional and global affairs,

Further Noting that Ariusgrad introduced to Philippinesat least 11 new government capacities within a constitutional democratic setup, including the Vice Delegate (Vice President), the Communications Officer (Minister of Foreign Affairs), the Homeland Officer (Minister of Domestic Affairs), and the Security Officer (Minister of Defense) as a commitment towards efficient and effective service within and outside the region the creation of a legislative body in the form of the Regional Congress, which by so doing has ensured the promotion of inclusive and sustainable development for its members and allies. By doing this it has ensured smooth running of the region and prevention of the region from being taken by outside forces.Ariusgrad's initiatives to continually engage members through promotion of roleplaying, mapmaking, and similar activities such as the Philippine Olympics and the Philippine Basketball Association.


I feel like this part especially the third paragraph in particular, could be condensed down to it's main points, and that'll cut a lot of characters and make your proposal flow more efficiently.

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Praeceps
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Postby Praeceps » Sat Feb 27, 2021 2:04 pm

Whew! That's a mouthful. I don't have time to provide feedback on proposals at the moment but I wanted to give you a few tips for condensing it yet being able to keep the material. First, remove [region] tags if you have already linked to the region once before, no need to link to the region a second time. Secondly, consider referring to regions by their abbreviations after the first time you link to them eg. "The Black Hawks (TBH)" can then be referred to as TBH subsequently, saving you on character space.
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Eumaeus
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Postby Eumaeus » Sat Feb 27, 2021 2:58 pm

I started working on my usual in-depth feedback for this draft, however when I realized that I was only on the fourth clause after an hour of work it dawned on me that what I was doing was to a certain extent fruitless because, as many others have pointed out, this proposal is too long and too dense. My biggest piece of feedback will render much of the typos and other errors that I point out irrelevant, therefore I have stopped halfway through the proposal and will give more detailed feedback at another time for a future draft.

Free Azell wrote:The Security Council,

Acknowledging that the region Philippines has, for most of its history, existed without a founder and is extremely vulnerable to invasion by foreign armies, and that the sustained protection of such a region without a password requires a lot of work and dedication,

That comma after "armies" isn't necessary and I would recommend finding an alternative to "a lot of" as it doesn't flow particularly well (maybe "an immense amount of"?).
Recognizing that Ariusgrad has put painstaking effort into protecting their region Philippines since their first election as World Assembly Delegate of the region on 31st January 2012,

[Recognizing] that Ariusgrad has remained the longest serving Delegate of Philippines, serving in the midst of internal conflict and external threats, and not only ensuring that the voice of similar medium-sized regions are heard in the global stage but also providing crucial security for the region and its allies.

You have an extra space before "Recognizing". I split this clause into two, partially because separating them structurally at least gives the illusion of concision and partially because I think the two halves of the clause are different enough to justify separation. I repeated "Recognizing" but you could find a different word to use there.

I'd also like to recommend that the author refrain from including bbcode every time the mention the target nation or region. It will make the text much less cluttered.

Noting almost 9 years of unparalleled service of Ariusgradto Philippines as its President, encouraging active participation of its residents in regional and global affairs,

Further Noting that Ariusgrad introduced to Philippinesat least 11 new government capacities within a constitutional democratic setup, including the Vice Delegate (Vice President), the Communications Officer (Minister of Foreign Affairs), the Homeland Officer (Minister of Domestic Affairs), and the Security Officer (Minister of Defense) as a commitment towards efficient and effective service within and outside the region the creation of a legislative body in the form of the Regional Congress, which by so doing has ensured the promotion of inclusive and sustainable development for its members and allies. By doing this it has ensured smooth running of the region and prevention of the region from being taken by outside forces.Ariusgrad's initiatives to continually engage members through promotion of roleplaying, mapmaking, and similar activities such as the Philippine Olympics and the Philippine Basketball Association.


I found a broken nation tag, as well as several instances in which the inclusion of bbcode appears to have unintentionally removed the spaces between words. The section highlighted in orange is ideal for concision edits, however because it is also informative I'll leave it to the author's discretion to decide what to include there (though I question whether naming these roles is even necessary).

In sum though, this clause is extremely dense and seems to be missing some punctuation marks: it makes for a very confusing paragraph and I would recommend either separating arguments or heavily rewriting the paragraph.

Further Noting Ariusgrad many contributions to Philippines, including:
  • the introduction of at least 11 new government capacities within a constitutional democratic setup as a commitment towards efficient and effective service both within and outside the region
  • the creation of a legislative body, in the form of the Regional Congress, that has ensured the promotion of inclusive and sustainable development for the region's members and allies, and
  • the continual promotion of initiatives to engage members through roleplaying, mapmaking, and similar activities such as the Philippine Olympics and the Philippine Basketball Association.

This draft desperately needs to be edited for concision. It is very thorough and very well written, however it includes a lot of superfluous information and is so dense that at times it is difficult to understand. Additionally, there are numerous instances in which the inclusion of nation/region bbcode tags seems to have unintentionally deleted the spaces between words and there are also quite a few broken nation/region tags scattered throughout the draft. It is extremely cluttered (which is admittedly preferable to the alternative) and in my opinion is currently in a stage at which SC contributors will not be able to help much in the way of writing and editorial feedback.

My recommendation to the author is to go back through this completed draft and remove as much unnecessary language as possible and start marking pieces of information for future removal. Under the spoiled section, the text that I have highlighted orange is a perfect example of information that may not be entirely worth inclusion. Additionally, I include several different means of making the writing more concise, and I would recommend paying attention to them and attempting them on your own. For now, you should focus on factual and rhetorical matters in this thread and proofreading on your own.

Please do not interpret this criticism in the wrong tone: This draft is is too long, too dense, and a bit rough around the edges in terms of editing and coding; nonetheless, I think this is a very well written proposal and, although I do not have an informed opinion regarding merit, I think it is worth pursuing even if it is only on the grounds that I want to see what the author is capable of.
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Bhang Bhang Duc
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Postby Bhang Bhang Duc » Sat Feb 27, 2021 3:13 pm

I fell asleep trying to read through this draft. I’m not saying it’s a bad draft, but it could really do with a lot of editing.

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Lanaograd
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Postby Lanaograd » Sat Feb 27, 2021 6:57 pm

Tinhampton wrote:Some short observations:
  1. "Philippinessince" (in the RECOGNISING clause) and "Ariusgradto" (in the NOTING clause) both have missing spaces. There areplenty of other missing spaces and broken tags in your text but I can't be bothered to look through all of them P:
  2. Neither Founderless nor its spiritual forebear, the FRA, existed at the time of Philippines' Christmas 2017 liberation.
  3. nice humblebrag(s) lol :P
  4. Your proposal is a whopping 8,500 characters long, which I think is even worse than Crazybloxian Empire's attempt to regulate corporal punishment a few years ago! That's going to be a lot of trimming - for starters, you mention the Yuletide invasion/defence twice
  5. How has Lanaograd helped with this?


Basically it was based on the original proposal I drafted with Kuriko, and most of the necessary details also came from my side. We do note the forum's call for brevity, but I also feel the details should not be sacrificed in the process. We will definitely work on a more readable version.

I was wondering on your comment on Founderless. It did not seem to be cited in the 2017 Christmas operation as part of the coalition. We are aware FRA cted around 2016.

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Free Azell
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Father Knows Best State

Postby Free Azell » Sun Feb 28, 2021 9:30 am

Thank you everyone for the great feedback. I believe I have fixed the grammar and tag errors in the second draft which has shortened it some. I did some other reductions as well to this new draft. I still feel it needs some condensing which will be worked on more this coming week.

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Wallenburg
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Democratic Socialists

Postby Wallenburg » Tue Mar 02, 2021 11:01 am

Free Azell wrote:Thank you everyone for the great feedback. I believe I have fixed the grammar and tag errors in the second draft which has shortened it some. I did some other reductions as well to this new draft. I still feel it needs some condensing which will be worked on more this coming week.

It needs a lot of condensing. At this length, it cannot be submitted to the Security Council. It exceeds the 5000 character limit.
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Free Azell
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Postby Free Azell » Sun Mar 07, 2021 9:59 am

Draft 3 is up for review. It is now below the 5K character limit. Feedback on further improvements would be greatly appreciated.

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Grey County
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Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Grey County » Sun Mar 07, 2021 10:06 am

I support this resolution but it is still super long but it may be neccessarry

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Tinhampton
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Anarchy

Postby Tinhampton » Sun Mar 07, 2021 10:45 am

Some complaints, mostly stylistic and mostly in the order I thought of them:
  1. You use bullet points in the FURTHER NOTING clause but not in the ADMIRING or GRATEFUL clauses :p
  2. "Den" should be capitalised in the ADMIRING clause. I fail to see in any case why being the target of a delegate-bumping operation before being restored a couple of updates later should be Commended in the first place.
  3. You abbreviate TBH, TSP, TEP and URA without explaining what those acronyms mean.
  4. Ariusgrad only "presid[ed] over the region at its highest population of 177 nations in 2017" because Philippines at the time was trying to survive a large invasion by some independent militaries; this was the "larger invasion with 50 raiders" you describe in the ADMIRING clause. (One week before reaching its record high, Philippines had a relatively meagre 65 nations, for comparison.) This was bad luck, not "dedicated recruitment."
  5. The guard (singular), not The Guards (plural)... and you've already clarified their relation to Shinka once, don't need to do so again that'll save you about eight characters :P
  6. In the other three sections of the ADMIRING clause, you list the defender organisations that helped Philippines. Under the "24th March 2018" section, however, you do not name these defenders but merely refer to them as "coalition of defenders that Ariusgrad had assembled through years of extensive foreign relations work." Who were they and how do we know that they defended Philippines on Ariusgrad's request rather than doing so because it's their job? ;P
  7. You refer to "Grey Wardens" in the second section of the ADMIRING clause but "The Order of the Grey Wardens [and] Spear Danes" in the fourth. Those are - as far as I am aware - the same defender organisation, TGW.
  8. You assert that Ariusgrad has "maintain[ed] fruitful relations with key allies as a voice to the world for small- and medium-sized regions, while further actively supporting the inter-regional alliance URA." Did they "maintain [such] fruitful relations" by membership of the URA or in conjunction with it?
  9. How significant was the Filipino contribution in "notable operations in allied regions such as [...]"?
Last edited by Tinhampton on Sun Mar 07, 2021 11:22 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Pluvie
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Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Pluvie » Sun Mar 07, 2021 10:48 am

I’m probably not going to support this resolution either way. Just like last time, I just really do not see the target as commendable
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Francois Isidore
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Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Francois Isidore » Sun Mar 07, 2021 2:00 pm

Free Azell wrote:Admiring the work undertaken by Ariusgrad to safeguard the region from at least 30 invasion attempts during their administration, providing lessons to current and former government leaders on military principles such as cross-endorsement, influence piling, and coalition-building observable in a large-scale setup. These invasions include:

- 3rd July 2017: Invasion by Den and TBH that put Defense Minister Jose Maria Sison as Delegate briefly till defenders from Yggdrasil assisted local defense and placed Ariusgrad back as Delegate the next update. A larger invasion with 50 raiders was thwarted later, on 22nd July.

- 17th December 2017: The "Christmas Invasion" involving more than 70 raiders from The Black Hawks,The Roman Empire, and The Imperium of Agia Germania quashed by a 14-region defender coalition assisting the Philippines. The said coalition included TSP, TEP, Texas, The Rejected Realms,Grey Wardens, The Union of Democratic States, Caer Sidi, Lily, Spiritus, 10000 Islands, The Guards (Shinka), Renegade Islands Alliance, Aenaroth and Force.

- 24th March 2018: An invasion led by South Eastern Ossetia from Lazarus, along with The West Pacific, Unknown, and The Roman Empire was thwarted by the coalition of defenders that Ariusgrad had assembled through years of extensive foreign relations work.

- 12th November 2018: An invasion by TBH, Europeia, Balder, and The Land of Kings and Emperors was defeated even with a total of 50 raiders in the operation. The defender coalition included 10000 Islands, The Order of the Grey Wardens, The Guards(Shinka), Spear Danes, and The Galactic Empire of Great Britain.

Respectfully, this proposal, even on its third draft, reads more like a laundry list of dates and times than anything else. It's perfectly fine to appropriate the when and where in terms of giving voters a timeline to look back on and reference, but it's another thing when your bullet points and lists -- the meat of this proposal, so to speak -- are bogged down by writing that lacks a flow and/or any story being told.

I may seem as though I'm being a bit harsh, and I do apologize if you feel as though I'm giving this proposal undue flack, but my personal opinion on C&Cs is that they should be able to communicate to voters who may be entirely unfamiliar with your nominee why they are commendable/condemnable whilst also telling the unique story of that nominee. It lacks depth, I'm afraid. You tell us the what of what they did, but you rarely link it back to why that's significant, impactful, and more importantly, commendable.

I'd recommend focusing on a better flow throughout the proposal and having your clauses amount to the case of "Yes, this nominee is commendable and these things are important for x, y, and z reasoning." Right now, that's not the message that I walk away with after reading this, unfortunately
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The Unified Missourtama States
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Democratic Socialists

Postby The Unified Missourtama States » Sun Mar 07, 2021 2:48 pm

World Assembly Resolutions aren't supposed to be out of character. What you have here isn't out of character, but it's definitely not in character, there needs to be some narrative of the nation's impact on the world, no need for a linear list of all accomplishments, tell us how the world has changed due to the actions of this nation.
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Free Azell
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Father Knows Best State

Postby Free Azell » Mon Mar 08, 2021 3:56 pm

Thanks for all the feedback. I will review all of it again and start work on Draft 4 this week. Hopefully, it will be much improved with the great feedback given!

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Free Azell
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Postby Free Azell » Sun Mar 14, 2021 9:48 am

Draft 4 is up for feedback! Hopefully, we have addressed some of the concerns from the last draft!

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Tinhampton
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Postby Tinhampton » Fri Mar 19, 2021 8:57 am

16/03/2021, 18:43:14 GMT: Ariusgrad was ejected from the WA for rule violations.
16/03/2021, 18:43:14 GMT: Lanaograd was ejected from the WA for rule violations.


Ellenburg, do you intend to press ahead with this draft?
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Bhang Bhang Duc
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Postby Bhang Bhang Duc » Fri Mar 19, 2021 9:52 am

Tinhampton wrote:16/03/2021, 18:43:14 GMT: Ariusgrad was ejected from the WA for rule violations.
16/03/2021, 18:43:14 GMT: Lanaograd was ejected from the WA for rule violations.


Ellenburg, do you intend to press ahead with this draft?

Well, that puts the cat amongst the pigeons for this draft. One assumes it was for multi-ing, unless someone knows different?
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Postby Gibraltarica » Fri Mar 19, 2021 4:04 pm

Bhang Bhang Duc wrote:
Tinhampton wrote:16/03/2021, 18:43:14 GMT: Ariusgrad was ejected from the WA for rule violations.
16/03/2021, 18:43:14 GMT: Lanaograd was ejected from the WA for rule violations.


Ellenburg, do you intend to press ahead with this draft?

Well, that puts the cat amongst the pigeons for this draft. One assumes it was for multi-ing, unless someone knows different?

The claim I’ve heard from Lanaograd is that this is a matter of mistaken identity due to IP addresses in the Philippines being arranged in such a way that multiple people can share them. Not sure if that’s possible or how it could be resolved, but that’s what I heard.
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Comfed
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Postby Comfed » Sat Mar 20, 2021 6:14 am

Gibraltarica wrote:
Bhang Bhang Duc wrote:Well, that puts the cat amongst the pigeons for this draft. One assumes it was for multi-ing, unless someone knows different?

The claim I’ve heard from Lanaograd is that this is a matter of mistaken identity due to IP addresses in the Philippines being arranged in such a way that multiple people can share them. Not sure if that’s possible or how it could be resolved, but that’s what I heard.

Moderation uses evidence beyond IP checks though...
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Postby Not no one » Sat Mar 20, 2021 6:17 am

Free Azell wrote:Draft 1:
The Security Council,

Acknowledging that the region Philippines has, for most of its history, existed without a founder and is extremely vulnerable to invasion by foreign armies and that the sustained protection of such a region without a password requires a lot of work and dedication,

Recognizing that Ariusgrad has made painstaking efforts into protecting their region Philippines since their first election to the position of World Assembly delegate of the region in 31st January 2012, and has remained the longest serving representative of the region to this body in the midst of internal conflict and external threats, not only ensuring that the voice of similar medium-sized regions are heard in the global stage but also providing crucial security for the region and its allies.

Noting almost 9 years of unparalleled service of Ariusgradto Philippines as its President, encouraging active participation of its residents in regional and global affairs,

Further Noting that Ariusgrad introduced to Philippinesat least 11 new government capacities within a constitutional democratic setup, including the Vice Delegate (Vice President), the Communications Officer (Minister of Foreign Affairs), the Homeland Officer (Minister of Domestic Affairs), and the Security Officer (Minister of Defense) as a commitment towards efficient and effective service within and outside the region the creation of a legislative body in the form of the Regional Congress, which by so doing has ensured the promotion of inclusive and sustainable development for its members and allies. By doing this it has ensured smooth running of the region and prevention of the region from being taken by outside forces.Ariusgrad's initiatives to continually engage members through promotion of roleplaying, mapmaking, and similar activities such as the Philippine Olympics and the Philippine Basketball Association.

Praising Ariusgrad’s leadership in bringingPhilippines to new heights and allowing it to thrive, presiding over the region at its highest population of 177 nations in 2017 and ensuring a continued active World Assembly member nation population, likely the result of Ariusgrad’s unwavering efforts in recruiting new nations for the region,

Awestruck by the conduct of defense operations to defeat the 2017 Christmas Invasion, which involved organizing a massive 14-region coalition that included The South Pacific The East Pacific, TITO, The Order of Grey Wardens, among others, to expel more than 70 invader nations from the Black Hawks, the Roman Empire, and the Imperium of Angia Germania, providing lessons for future military strategists on the principles of cross-endorsement, influence piling, and coalition-building as observed in a large-scale setup.

Admiring the fact that they quickly and effectively safeguarded the region from at least 30 invasion attempts during their administration of Philippines, including at least four that had a total of over 40 invading nations. These included:

- 3rd July 2017: Invasion by Den and The Black Hawks that put Defense Minister Jose Maria Sison as Delegate briefly till defenders from Yggdrasil assisted local defense and placed Ariusgrad back as Delegate the next update. A larger invasion with 50 raiders was thwarted later, on 22nd July. Meanwhile, Sison would cause trouble for the region and its defender allies in September to October of 2017.

- 17th December 2017: The "Christmas Invasion" involving more than 70 raiders from The Black Hawks, The Roman Empire, and The Imperium of Agia Germania quashed by a 14-region defender coalition assisting the Philippines. The said coalition included The South Pacific The East Pacific, Texas, The Rejected Realms, The Order of the Grey Wardens, The Union of Democratic States, Caer Sidi, Lily, Spiritus, 10000 Islands, The Guards (Shinka), Renegade Islands Alliance,andForce.

- 24th March 2018: An invasion led by South Eastern Ossetia from Lazarus, along with The West Pacific, Unknown, and The Roman Empire was thwarted by the coalition of defenders that[ nation]Ariusgrad[/nation] had assembled through years of extensive foreign relations work.

- 12th November 2018: An invasion byThe Black Hawks, Europeia, Balder, and The Land of Kings and Emperors was defeated even with a total of 50 raiders in the operation. The defender coalition included 10000 Islands, The Order of the Grey Wardens, The Guards (Shinka), Spear Danes, and The Galactic Empire of Great Britain.

Applauding Ariusgrad’s diplomatic prowess, as they helped their region create and maintain warm relations with major regions such as 10000 Islands, The Rejected Realms, The Order of the Grey Wardens, Cape of Good Hope, Spear Danes, Founderless, [region[Force[/region], St Abbaddon, Conch Kingdom, and Spiritus, as well as closely coordinating and working with a number of them in multiple liberation missions. In keeping the region from having to be password protected or liberated, Ariusgrad is a role model to all.

Grateful for Ariusgrad's continuing programs to implement defense praxis and reinforce security from the regional to the global scale in promotion of ready power for peace, taking proactive steps to keep Philippines a stable and growing founderless region, including:

- The formation of the Philippine Defense Force to formalize the military organization already honed by years of Ariusgrad's administration, whose primary purpose is to closely coordinate local defense and cooperate with allies to ensure the protection of the region from outside threats. This force is led by Ariusgrad as its commander-in-chief.

- The maintenance of important links with defender networks to sustain regional defense and to actively participate in extra-regional missions for freedom and peace, including notable operations in known allies such as Japan,]Singapore, Belgium, Iran, Syria, Asia,Katipunan, Angvar Region of Reunited Muslim States (now United Empire of Islam), and ASEAN (now Association of Southeast Asian Nations).

Respecting Ariusgrad’s prolific work in maintaining a strong interregional standing for Philippines, by negotiating the region’s entry into the inter-regional alliance URA, an alliance of over 30 independent regions dedicated to World Assembly matters and inter-regional peace.

Admiring Ariusgrad's initiatives to embrace the emerging Filipino community in NationStates through the facilitation of mergers with similarly Filipino-themed regions, as well as creating the Philippine Council of Affiliated Regions and Institutions (PCARI) to maintain a closely-knit network with Filipino-themed regions and institutions which opt to remain independent of the Philippines

Believing that Ariusgrad is a perfect role model that the nations of this assembly should emulate, due to their passionate individual participation, interregional relations, inclusiveness, openness, and democratization in this decade which has made the world a better place for all,

Hereby commends Ariusgrad.

Co-authored by[nation] Lanaograd[/nation



Draft 2:

The Security Council,

Acknowledging that the region Philippines has, for most of its history, existed without a founder and is extremely vulnerable to invasion by foreign armies and that the sustained protection of such a region without a password requires a lot of work and dedication,

Recognizing that Ariusgrad has made painstaking efforts into protecting their region Philippines since their first election to the position of World Assembly delegate of the region on 31st January 2012, and has remained the longest-serving representative of the region to this body amid internal conflict and external threats,

Noting almost 9 years of unparalleled service of Ariusgrad to Philippines as its President, encouraging active participation of its residents in regional and global affairs,

Further Noting that Ariusgrad introduced to Philippines several new government capacities, including the creation of a legislative body in the form of the 5-member Regional Congress, within a constitutional democratic setup, as a commitment towards efficient and effective service within and outside the region, and ensures the promotion of inclusive and sustainable development for its members and allies. Ariusgrad's initiatives to continually engage members through promotion of roleplaying, mapmaking, and similar activities such as the Philippine Olympics.

Praising Ariusgrad’s leadership in bringing Philippines to new heights and allowing it to thrive, presiding over the region at its highest population of 177 nations in 2017 and ensuring a continued active World Assembly member nation population, likely the result of Ariusgrad’s unwavering efforts in recruiting new nations for the region,

Awestruck by the conduct of defense operations to defeat the 2017 Christmas Invasion, which involved organizing a massive 14-region coalition that included The South Pacific The East Pacific, TITO, The Order of Grey Wardens, among others, to expel more than 70 invader nations from the Black Hawks, the Roman Empire, and the Imperium of Angia Germania, providing lessons for future military strategists on the principles of cross-endorsement, influence piling, and coalition-building as observed in a large-scale setup.

Admiring the fact that they quickly and effectively safeguarded the region from at least 30 invasion attempts during their administration of Philippines, including at least four that had a total of over 40 invading nations. These included:

- 3rd July 2017: Invasion by Den and TBH that put Defense Minister Jose Maria Sison as Delegate briefly till defenders from Yggdrasil assisted local defense and placed Ariusgrad back as Delegate the next update. A larger invasion with 50 raiders was thwarted later, on 22nd July. Meanwhile, Sison would cause trouble for the region and its defender allies from September to October of 2017.

- 17th December 2017: The "Christmas Invasion" involving more than 70 raiders from The Black Hawks,The Roman Empire, and The Imperium of Agia Germania quashed by a 14-region defender coalition assisting the Philippines. The said coalition included TSP,TEP, Texas,The Rejected Realms,Grey Wardens, The Union of Democratic States, Caer Sidi, Lily, Spiritus, 10000 Islands, The Guards (Shinka), Renegade Islands Alliance,and Force.

- 24th March 2018: An invasion led by South Eastern Ossetia from Lazarus, along with The West Pacific, Unknown, and The Roman Empire was thwarted by the coalition of defenders that Ariusgrad had assembled through years of extensive foreign relations work.

- 12th November 2018: An invasion by TBH, Europeia, Balder, and The Land of Kings and Emperors was defeated even with a total of 50 raiders in the operation. The defender coalition included 10000 Islands, The Order of the Grey Wardens, The Guards(Shinka), Spear Danes, and The Galactic Empire of Great Britain.

Applauding Ariusgrad’s diplomatic prowess, as they helped their region create and maintain warm relations with major regions such as 10KI, TRR, Grey Wardens, Cape of Good Hope, Spear Danes Founderless, Force, St Abbaddon,Conch Kingdom, and Spiritus, as well as closely coordinating and working with a number of them in multiple liberation missions. In keeping the region from having to be password protected or liberated, Ariusgrad is a role model to all.

Grateful for Ariusgrad's continuing programs to implement defense praxis and reinforce security from the regional to the global scale in promotion of ready power for peace, taking proactive steps to keep Philippines a stable and growing founderless region, including:

- The formation of the Philippine Defense Force to formalize the military organization already honed by years of Ariusgrad's administration, whose primary purpose is to closely coordinate local defense and cooperate with allies to ensure the protection of the region from outside threats. This force is led by Ariusgrad as its commander-in-chief.

- The maintenance of important links with defender networks to sustain regional defense and to actively participate in extra-regional missions for freedom and peace, including notable operations in known allies such as Japan,Singapore, Belgium, Iran, Syria, Asia,Katipunan, Angvar Region of Reunited Muslim States (now United Empire of Islam), and ASEAN (now Association of Southeast Asian Nations).

Respecting Ariusgrad’s prolific work in maintaining a strong interregional standing for Philippines, by negotiating the region’s entry into the inter-regional alliance URA, an alliance of over 30 independent regions dedicated to World Assembly matters and inter-regional peace.

Admiring Ariusgrad's initiatives to embrace the emerging Filipino community in NationStates through the facilitation of mergers with similarly Filipino-themed regions, as well as creating the Philippine Council of Affiliated Regions and Institutions (PCARI) to maintain a closely-knit network with Filipino-themed regions and institutions which opt to remain independent of the Philippines

Believing that Ariusgrad is a perfect role model that the nations of this assembly should emulate, due to their passionate individual participation, interregional relations, inclusiveness, openness, and democratization in this decade which has made the world a better place for all,

Hereby commends Ariusgrad.

Co-authored by Lanaograd


Draft Three

The Security Council,

Acknowledging that the region Philippines existed without a founder for most of its history, requiring a great deal of effort to protect the vulnerable region from invasions,

Noting the 9 years of unparalleled service by Ariusgrad to Philippines as its President and Delegate through both internal and external conflict, all while encouraging the active participation of its residents in regional and global affairs,

Further noting the accomplishments of Ariusgrad in Philippines to promote inclusiveness and sustainable development including
  • the establishment of the Regional Congress as a legislative body,
  • the creation of an effective civil service through new positions such as the Communications Officer and Security Officer,
  • the promotion of cultural events in roleplay, map-making, the Philippine Olympics, and the Philippine Basketball Association,

Praising Ariusgrad’s leadership in bringing Philippines to new heights through dedicated recruitment, presiding over the region at its highest population of 177 nations in 2017, doubling the regional population over a five-year period, and developing an active World Assembly member population,

Admiring the work undertaken by Ariusgrad to safeguard the region from at least 30 invasion attempts during their administration, providing lessons to current and former government leaders on military principles such as cross-endorsement, influence piling, and coalition-building observable in a large-scale setup. These invasions include:

- 3rd July 2017: Invasion by Den and TBH that put Defense Minister Jose Maria Sison as Delegate briefly till defenders from Yggdrasil assisted local defense and placed Ariusgrad back as Delegate the next update. A larger invasion with 50 raiders was thwarted later, on 22nd July.

- 17th December 2017: The "Christmas Invasion" involving more than 70 raiders from The Black Hawks,The Roman Empire, and The Imperium of Agia Germania quashed by a 14-region defender coalition assisting the Philippines. The said coalition included TSP, TEP, Texas, The Rejected Realms,Grey Wardens, The Union of Democratic States, Caer Sidi, Lily, Spiritus, 10000 Islands, The Guards (Shinka), Renegade Islands Alliance, Aenaroth and Force.

- 24th March 2018: An invasion led by South Eastern Ossetia from Lazarus, along with The West Pacific, Unknown, and The Roman Empire was thwarted by the coalition of defenders that Ariusgrad had assembled through years of extensive foreign relations work.

- 12th November 2018: An invasion by TBH, Europeia, Balder, and The Land of Kings and Emperors was defeated even with a total of 50 raiders in the operation. The defender coalition included 10000 Islands, The Order of the Grey Wardens, The Guards(Shinka), Spear Danes, and The Galactic Empire of Great Britain.

Applauding Ariusgrad's diplomatic prowess in maintaining fruitful relations with key allies as a voice to the world for small- and medium-sized regions, while further actively supporting the inter-regional alliance URA,

Grateful for Ariusgrad's programs to implement defense praxis and reinforce security, keeping Philippines a secure founderless region without password protection, which includes:

- The formation of the Philippine Defense Force to formalize the military organization already honed by years of Ariusgrad's administration, with a primary objective to coordinate local defense and cooperate with allies to protect the region from invasion,

- Maintaining connections with important defender networks, participating in notable operations in allied regions such as Japan, Singapore, Belgium, Iran, Syria, Asia, Katipunan, Angvar, United Empire of Islam, and Association of Southeast Asian Nations.

Admiring Ariusgrad's contributions to the Filipino community, through initiatives in the Philippine Council of Affiliated Regions and Institutions (PCARI) to maintain a closely-knit network of independent themed regions and institutions,

Hereby commends Ariusgrad.

Co-authored by Lanaograd


Draft 4:

The Security Council,

Acknowledging that for most of Philippines’ history, the founderless region has been open to invasion, devastation, and instability, and further acknowledging that for such a vulnerable region to emerge on the global stage requires utmost dedication and robust regional protection,

Recognizing the 9 years of unparalleled service and skilled leadership by Ariusgrad for Philippines during their tenure as President and World Assembly Delegate, where they resolved internal and external conflicts, encouraged the active participation of its residents in world affairs, and became a voice for the cause of small- and medium-sized regions in the international arena,

Grateful for Ariusgrad's programs to implement defense praxis and reinforce security, keeping Philippines a secure founderless region without password protection, which includes:
  • The formation of the Philippine Defense Force to formalize the military organization already honed by years of Ariusgrad's administration, aiming for local defense cooperation and joint liberation operations on a global scale,
  • Maintaining connections with important defender networks, and participating in notable defense operations for allied regions such as Japan, Singapore, Belgium, Iran, Syria, Asia, Katipunan, Angvar, United Empire of Islam, and Association of Southeast Asian Nations.

Noting the work undertaken by Ariusgrad to safeguard the region from at least 30 invasion attempts during their administration, providing lessons to current and former government leaders on military principles such as cross-endorsement, influence piling, and coalition-building observable in a large-scale setup. These invasions include:
  • 3rd July 2017: Invasion by DEN and TBH that put Defense Minister Jose Maria Sison as Delegate briefly till defenders from Yggdrasil assisted local defense and placed Ariusgrad back as Delegate the next update. A larger invasion with 50 raiders was thwarted later, on 22nd July.
  • 17th December 2017: The "Christmas Invasion" involving more than 70 raiders from The Black Hawks, The Roman Empire, and The Imperium of Agia Germania quashed by a 14-region defender coalition assisting the Philippines. The said coalition included TSP, TEP, Texas, The Rejected Realms, Grey Wardens, The Union of Democratic States, Caer Sidi, Lily, Spiritus, 10000 Islands, The Guards, Renegade Islands Alliance, Aenaroth, and Force.
  • 24th March 2018: An invasion led by South Eastern Ossetia from Lazarus, along with The West Pacific, Unknown, and The Roman Empire was thwarted by the coalition of defenders that Ariusgrad had assembled through years of extensive foreign relations work.
  • 12th November 2018: An invasion by TBH, Europeia, Balder, and The Land of Kings and Emperors was defeated even with a total of 50 raiders in the operation. The defender coalition included 10000 Islands, The Order of the Grey Wardens, The Guards, Spear Danes, and The Galactic Empire of Great Britain,

Admiring Ariusgrad for their diplomatic prowess and devotion to improving interregional cooperation, such as their formation of the Philippine Council of Affiliated Regions and Institutions which connected together organizations similar themes with Philippines, as well as their active support for URA, of which the Philippines has one of the leading roles in the alliance,

Praising Ariusgrad’s dedication to building a caring and sharing community for Philippines through recruitment and internal development, which doubled the regional population over a five-year period, maintaining over 100 nations in the past year alone, and cultivated active World Assembly membership,

Admiring the numerous accomplishments of Ariusgrad in Philippines which have promoted inclusiveness and sustainable development, such as:
  • the establishment of the Regional Congress as a legislative body, ensuring that regional residents’ grievances could be heard,
  • the creation of an effective and efficient civil service through new positions such as the Communications Officer and Security Officer,
  • the promotion of significant events and activities within the region such as the Philippine Olympics and the Philippines Basketball Association, which have greatly contributed to regional culture,

Believing that Ariusgrad’s tenacity and magnanimity have ensured that their region Philippines continues to thrive despite uncertain circumstances and that they serve as an excellent role model to leaders of any region,

Hereby commends Ariusgrad.

Co-authored by Lanaograd.


why did you resign?

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Comfed
Diplomat
 
Posts: 895
Founded: Apr 09, 2020
Psychotic Dictatorship

Postby Comfed » Sat Mar 20, 2021 6:22 am

Not no one wrote:
Free Azell wrote:snip
why did you resign?

The nominee was kicked from the WA for possible multiing.
Last edited by Comfed on Sat Mar 20, 2021 6:22 am, edited 1 time in total.
Mall:
Best part about being a mod was engaging in normal player behavior and getting accused of abuse
"You think this is abuse? I'll SHOW you abuse."
Ever-Wandering Souls wrote:In the liberal justice system, raiding-based offenses are considered especially heinous. In The South Pacific, the dedicated defenders who investigate these vicious felonies are members of an elite squad known as the Council on Regional Security. These are their proscriptions. DUN DUN.

Numero Capitan wrote:I haven't bothered reading back but I can unequivocally say that I agree with everything HEM has said and Unibot is wrong

Put this in your sig if you passed biology and know that gender and sex are not the same thing.

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