NationStates

I am making a proposal to commend Renegalle, the Founder of Force. This is what it should look like. (I’m new to the WA and the Forums, so I don’t really know how this works, but I’m just gonna try, since Renegalle really deserves to be commended)
Security Council,
Acknowledging that Renegalle has founded an excellent Region, Force, and that it is active and friendly. Renegalle has made a Discord server and a Forum, both of which are extremely active. Also acknowledging that he has made an eye-boggling level of advancement of a region, quite possibly one of the best of all regions. He therefore deserves to be commended.
Hereby commends Renegalle. So what do you think?

Connotar wrote:I am making a proposal to commend Renegalle, the Founder of Force. This is what it should look like. (I’m new to the WA and the Forums, so I don’t really know how this works, but I’m just gonna try, since Renegalle really deserves to be commended)
Security Council,
Acknowledging that Renegalle has founded an excellent Region, Force, and that it is active and friendly. Renegalle has made a Discord server and a Forum, both of which are extremely active. Also acknowledging that he has made an eye-boggling level of advancement of a region, quite possibly one of the best of all regions. He therefore deserves to be commended.
Hereby commends Renegalle. So what do you think?

Your proposal is short and not very good, and I recommend that you read the rules first before you write anything. Your proposal also breaks a lot of rules, such as 4th wall breaking.

Here is a rewriting of your proposal to avoid rule-breaking and to fix up some of the rough spots:

Drew Durrnil wrote:The Security Council,
Acknowledging that Renegalle has founded an excellent Region, Force, which is extremely friendly;
Noticing that Renegalle has created a prosperous regional community in Force, which is extremely active;
Praising that they have made an astonishing amount of advancement in Force, which is one of the best of all the regions;
Hereby commends Renegalle.

My version of your draft still isn't that good. Try to find more facts about Force and add it to your proposal.

You need to add more detail to your draft to make an argument why they should be commended. I also recommend to clean up your draft a bit so it's easier to read and follow.

Putting aside the fact I'm pretty against this on paper (given what I know about the target, they've done nothing within the scope of commendability), you need to clean this up. But there are some folks out there who'd be happy to help you on that. Who knows, maybe you do know more about him than I do. Best of luck!

My usual advice: read and understand the rules (as has been pointed out your initial draft is illegal), research your nominee and produce reasons why they should be commended and finally check out passed C&Cs to get an idea of the standard required.

At the moment, as well as being illegal, your draft has no details and is formatted very poorly.

Drew Durrnil wrote:

Connotar wrote:I am making a proposal to commend Renegalle, the Founder of Force. This is what it should look like. (I’m new to the WA and the Forums, so I don’t really know how this works, but I’m just gonna try, since Renegalle really deserves to be commended)
Security Council,
Acknowledging that Renegalle has founded an excellent Region, Force, and that it is active and friendly. Renegalle has made a Discord server and a Forum, both of which are extremely active. Also acknowledging that he has made an eye-boggling level of advancement of a region, quite possibly one of the best of all regions. He therefore deserves to be commended.
Hereby commends Renegalle. So what do you think?

Your proposal is short and not very good, and I recommend that you read the rules first before you write anything. Your proposal also breaks a lot of rules, such as 4th wall breaking.

Here is a rewriting of your proposal to avoid rule-breaking and to fix up some of the rough spots:

Drew Durrnil wrote:The Security Council,
Acknowledging that Renegalle has founded an excellent Region, Force, which is extremely friendly;
Noticing that Renegalle has created a prosperous regional community in Force, which is extremely active;
Praising that they have made an astonishing amount of advancement in Force, which is one of the best of all the regions;
Hereby commends Renegalle.

My version of your draft still isn't that good. Try to find more facts about Force and add it to your proposal.

OK, they said it was illegal anyways. Thanks for the help, though!

Nothing remotely commendable here.

From reading the Force RMB it looks like the OP has decided to put this in the “Too hard” basket.

Bhang Bhang Duc wrote:From reading the Force RMB it looks like the OP has decided to put this in the “Too hard” basket.

Its also frowned upon to commend someone in your own region.

I'm pretty sure the person trying to commend Renegalle doesn't know much about how the WA works or how commendation works and is just doing this because the nation is a friend of his/her's.

Drew Durrnil wrote:

Bhang Bhang Duc wrote:From reading the Force RMB it looks like the OP has decided to put this in the “Too hard” basket.

Its also frowned upon to commend someone in your own region.

No, not really. See this post in another thread.

viewtopic.php?p=38292272#p38292272

Commending your own region is a bit more problematic.

Bhang Bhang Duc wrote:Commending your own region is a bit more problematic.

I would be inclined to agree with this. Commending regionmates is just like commending friends, and commends done by friends are often a lot better informed and better written due to a personal relationship with the commendee. Commending ones own region is slightly less chill as that includes yourself and so it's kind of like commending your own nation which is often considered to be in very poor taste.

Renegalle is a great nation, but this proposal doesn't outline this well or really state any reasons for commendation.