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PostPosted: Tue Jul 21, 2020 9:44 am
by Bhang Bhang Duc
North Prarie wrote:
Bhang Bhang Duc wrote:Leading the resistance to a coup would be highly commendable, wouldn’t it? I dropped out of the game for 18 months round about that time so I don’t know why including it would be controversial.

Can’t advise you about contacts in Forest, don’t know anyone there. Sorry.

It's widely regarded as a civil war - it wasn't a clear cut abuse of power either way (well, I think it was..)
The coup was also backed by multiple foreign powers and a mention of Somy's efforts could kill it in those regions' minds.

Rock and a hard place by the sounds of it. Without the details on the Laz delegacy there’s not enough there, in my opinion, for a Commend. With the details, well.....

If it was me I’d publish and be damned, but it’s your draft.

PostPosted: Tue Jul 21, 2020 10:12 am
by A Bloodred Moon
Just some general criticism/thoughts.

North Prarie wrote:The Security Council,

Recalling [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]’s work in defending natives from hostile invasions, including:
  • their founding of an interregional defender alliance called Solidarity (Solidarian Fleet) at the end of 2016, where their courageous leadership helped restore regions destroyed by raiders,
  • Co-founding the United Task Force in 2017, which served as a vehicle for joint
    military operations for defender militaries,

You have a weird break here in the line. Other than that, how impactful was this "United Task Force"?

  • Serving as the Minister of Military Affairs for the South Pacific, where they revamped the organizational and graphical style of the South Pacific Special Forces, crafting it into the military organization it is today,
  • Establishing, as the Minister of Military Affairs, the SPSF Reserve, a first of its kind organization that enabled citizens to help with military efforts without liberating or defending,

  • Fair enough, though I have to ask (again) how impactful Somyrion's term was.

    Applauding [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]’s service as Celestial Being of Lazarus. a position they used to protect the region, as well as serving as the Commander of the Lazarene Celestial Armada,

    First of all, you used a full stop instead of a comma. Second, protect Lazarus from what? How did they use it to defend the region, and against who?

    Praising [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]’s service as World Assembly Delegate of the South Pacific for almost a year from August 2019, overseeing at one stage a doubling in their endorsement tally from their inauguration as Delegate, through active participation in the Southern World Assembly Initiative (SWAN) and the institution of Endorsement Days where nations were urged to endorse as many other South Pacifican WA members as possible,

    You mean due to the Drew boom? Didn't we already try to commend Drew? :p

    Observing [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]'s work for the largest news publication in NationStates, NationStates Today, such as:
    • Serving as a Director of Graphics and Publishing, a position where they curated the graphics and style of the organization and newspaper,
    • Serving multiple terms as Governor of NationStates Today, an administrative position of the organization,

    Bold: what did they do in this position? How is it commendable?

    PostPosted: Tue Jul 21, 2020 5:23 pm
    by Auphelia
    An extraordinarily evil villain? You flatter me.

    However, I don’t believe I can support this. While I have peaked in my villainy, I believe Aumeltopia still has places to go and new heights to reach. He’s truly a dear and I would love to see a Commendation a year or two from now with even more accomplishments.

    PostPosted: Tue Jul 21, 2020 5:28 pm
    by The Yellow Emperor
    Auphelia wrote:An extraordinarily evil villain? You flatter me.

    However, I don’t believe I can support this. While I have peaked in my villainy, I believe Aumeltopia still has places to go and new heights to reach. He’s truly a dear and I would love to see a Commendation a year or two from now with even more accomplishments.

    I agree with this point of view.

    PostPosted: Wed Jul 22, 2020 4:40 am
    by Fauxia
    Auphelia wrote:An extraordinarily evil villain? You flatter me.

    However, I don’t believe I can support this. While I have peaked in my villainy, I believe Aumeltopia still has places to go and new heights to reach. He’s truly a dear and I would love to see a Commendation a year or two from now with even more accomplishments.

    Does he? His term in the Delegacy just ended (as you well know).

    PostPosted: Wed Jul 22, 2020 11:56 am
    by United States of Vietnam
    Fauxia wrote:
    Auphelia wrote:An extraordinarily evil villain? You flatter me.

    However, I don’t believe I can support this. While I have peaked in my villainy, I believe Aumeltopia still has places to go and new heights to reach. He’s truly a dear and I would love to see a Commendation a year or two from now with even more accomplishments.

    Does he? His term in the Delegacy just ended (as you well know).


    The delegacy is just a ceremonial role. The Prime Minister is the true high but that said, accomplishments define heights, not roles.

    PostPosted: Wed Jul 22, 2020 1:07 pm
    by Qvait
    Bormiar wrote:I believe they also created the Pacific-Con graphics, though you'll need to check that.

    Can confirm that Aumeltopia and Fujai tag-teamed the Pacific-Con graphics.

    PostPosted: Wed Jul 22, 2020 2:29 pm
    by North Prarie
    Qvait wrote:
    Bormiar wrote:I believe they also created the Pacific-Con graphics, though you'll need to check that.

    Can confirm that Aumeltopia and Fujai tag-teamed the Pacific-Con graphics.

    That looked like a Somy Graphics production ;P

    PostPosted: Thu Jul 23, 2020 2:25 am
    by Daytime to Night
    The current draft reads well and this is a good piece of work

    My main concern is the ordering which doesn't feel completely natural. For example, the clauses go through Aumeltopia's contributions in individual regions, then comment on their general work in graphics/design, and then goes back to discuss their contributions in Forest. I feel like the more general non-region specific clauses should go before or after the region-specific ones, not mixed together.

    It also seems slightly odd opening with Solidarity and the United Task Force, not sure these names will mean much to many people in 2020, and it seems an especially out of place opener when they led the SPSF and LCA too. Is there a reason why the LCA isn't covered in this clause?

    Calling the SPSF Reserve a "first of its kind organization" is slightly misleading, I assume you mean the first of its kind in the South Pacific? I don't know if that phrase is necessary when you already said that they 'established' it

    PostPosted: Mon Aug 03, 2020 9:26 am
    by North Prarie
    Thanks for the help, everyone - I've seen your suggestions and I'll do some editing later today.
    I'll probably add some more graphics work, and do some re-ordering and strengthening. After that, if it's fine, I'll probably submit - It's definitely tough because some of their most commendable achievements I either haven't gotten info on, or are taboo.
    Again, all criticism is appreciated.

    PostPosted: Mon Aug 03, 2020 9:30 am
    by Comfed
    Just to throw my hat into the ring, lots of people have tried this before and they have largely been abandoned, which is a shame, because Somyrion (Aumeltopia) is very deserving of a commendation.

    That said, being a feeder delegate does not instantly merit SC recognition.

    PostPosted: Thu Aug 20, 2020 1:48 pm
    by North Prarie
    Hi everyone, long time no see!

    I've re-ordered the clauses, and also expanded on their time as TSP Del, their work in Laz, their work in NST, as well as their graphics.
    I'll be sure to be doing some more research on Laz as well.

    PostPosted: Thu Aug 20, 2020 2:38 pm
    by Saint Sche Batose
    SkyDip wrote:
    North Prarie wrote:RECALLING [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]’s work in defending natives from hostile invasions, including:[list]
    *]Founding the Defender group ‘Solidarity’ in late 2016, showcasing their dedication to the community and displaying early on their leadership skills,
    [*]Serving as commander of the Lazarene Celestial Armada,
    [*]Co-founding the United Task Force in 2017, which served as a vehicle for joint
    [*]military operations for defender militaries,
    [*]Serving as the Minister of Military Affairs for the South Pacific, where they revamped the organizational and [*]graphical style of the South Pacific Special Forces, crafting it into the military organization it is today,
    [*]Establishing, as the Minister of Military Affairs, the Tidal Force, a first of its kind organization that enabled citizens to help with [*]military efforts without liberating or defending,

    You've got multiple extra lines in there that are unnecessary.

    North Prarie wrote:APPLAUDING [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]’s service as Celestial Being of Lazarus, a position they used to fortify regional security and establish community.

    Period instead of comma here.

    North Prarie wrote:PRAISING [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]’s service as current Delegate of the South Pacific and its service to SWAN, the program to encourage nations to become more involved in the World Assembly and to revamp World Assembly infrastructure in the South Pacific that serves as inspiration for other regions today,

    You're switching your pronouns quite a bit here - their versus its.

    North Prarie wrote:RECOGNIZING [nation=noflag]Aumeltopia[/nation]’s service on the Local Council of the South Pacific, a team that moderates the Regional Message Board and community activities,

    The legality of this seems...questionable to me. Using Regional Message Board might be a violation of 4c. Perhaps modify the language there.


    It doesn't matter if they're switching pronouns a lot. In fact, it's better than to repeat the same pronoun over and over.

    PostPosted: Thu Aug 20, 2020 3:35 pm
    by Electrum
    Saint Sche Batose wrote:It doesn't matter if they're switching pronouns a lot. In fact, it's better than to repeat the same pronoun over and over.


    Please don't quote the whole thing next time. Also that's not true. Using different pronouns confuses the subject of the resolution.

    PostPosted: Fri Aug 21, 2020 11:34 am
    by North Prarie
    Should I Last Call this? Once I've gotten more info on the Laz stuff, I'll be submitting.

    PostPosted: Fri Aug 21, 2020 3:30 pm
    by Saint Sche Batose
    Electrum wrote:
    Saint Sche Batose wrote:It doesn't matter if they're switching pronouns a lot. In fact, it's better than to repeat the same pronoun over and over.


    Please don't quote the whole thing next time. Also that's not true. Using different pronouns confuses the subject of the resolution.


    Don't tell me what I can and can't do. Second, If it confuses you, you're stupid.

    PostPosted: Fri Aug 21, 2020 7:07 pm
    by Reploid Productions
    Saint Sche Batose wrote:Don't tell me what I can and can't do. Second, If it confuses you, you're stupid.

    Too bad, because I'm telling you what to do and backing it up with a banhammer. Since you apparently missed it the last time, namecalling is not how we do things around here. Calling people "stupid" is usually pretty mild, but you already have an extensive history and proven failure to learn from your past mistakes.

    The site rules. These are very important. Behaving within the boundaries of acceptable conduct they lay out prevents you from getting hit with the banhammer. Breaking them earns you an escalating series of punishments up to and including account deletions.

    *** Saint Sche Batose, 3-day ban for flaming. ***

    Image
    ~Evil Forum Empress Rep Prod the Ninja Mod
    ~She who wields the Banhammer; master of the mighty moderation no-dachi Kiritateru Teikoku

    PostPosted: Sun Aug 23, 2020 3:20 am
    by Daytime to Night
    North Prarie wrote:Should I Last Call this? Once I've gotten more info on the Laz stuff, I'll be submitting.


    I would give people a chance to comment on any new material before you give a last call for comments

    PostPosted: Sun Aug 23, 2020 3:24 am
    by Willingdon and Jevington
    Grateful for Aumeltopia's authorship of SC #212 "Repeal "Liberate Kingdom of Ireland", which ensured natives could protect their region from invasions via a password, and SC #307 "Condemn Auphelia", which condemned an extraordinarily evil nation notorious for terrorizing the South Pacific and her allies,


    You missed something there, unless it was intentional.

    PostPosted: Sun Aug 23, 2020 9:22 am
    by North Prarie
    Willingdon and Jevington wrote:
    Grateful for Aumeltopia's authorship of SC #212 "Repeal "Liberate Kingdom of Ireland", which ensured natives could protect their region from invasions via a password, and SC #307 "Condemn Auphelia", which condemned an extraordinarily evil nation notorious for terrorizing the South Pacific and her allies,


    You missed something there, unless it was intentional.

    What did I miss?

    PostPosted: Mon Aug 24, 2020 12:31 am
    by Willingdon and Jevington
    North Prarie wrote:
    Willingdon and Jevington wrote:
    You missed something there, unless it was intentional.

    What did I miss?

    The hash in SC 307 Condemn Auphelia

    PostPosted: Mon Aug 24, 2020 3:44 pm
    by North Prarie
    Willingdon and Jevington wrote:
    North Prarie wrote:What did I miss?

    The hash in SC 307 Condemn Auphelia

    That's how it's supposed to be written....I've never heard of people using a hash in that place before.

    PostPosted: Mon Aug 24, 2020 3:50 pm
    by Morover
    North Prarie wrote:
    Willingdon and Jevington wrote:The hash in SC 307 Condemn Auphelia

    That's how it's supposed to be written....I've never heard of people using a hash in that place before.

    If you use the hash in one, use it in both.

    Also, in the repeal, write it as "Repeal 'Liberate Kingdom of Ireland'"

    PostPosted: Mon Aug 24, 2020 4:01 pm
    by North Prarie
    Morover wrote:
    North Prarie wrote:That's how it's supposed to be written....I've never heard of people using a hash in that place before.

    If you use the hash in one, use it in both.

    Also, in the repeal, write it as "Repeal 'Liberate Kingdom of Ireland'"

    Ah, alright. Fixed.

    PostPosted: Mon Aug 24, 2020 6:06 pm
    by Tinhampton
    North Prarie wrote:Co-founding the United Task Force in 2017, which served as a vehicle for joint
    military operations for defender militaries,

    Obvious linebreak is obvious, please remove :P