[WITHDRAWN] Commend Lenlyvit

[Kozmix]

NOTING Lenlyvit's numerous contributions to the Security Council and to protecting and defending regions not capable of doing the same themselves;

RECOGNIZING Lenlyvit's immense efforts in the founding, creation and development of The Union of Democratic States Armed Forces (UDSAF);

FURTHER RECOGNIZING that UDSAF has played crucial supporting roles in multiple major liberations including that of St Abbaddon. The foreign occupation of St. Abbaddon prompted intervention and condemnation from the WA Security Council in a number of resolutions including SC Resolution #189, "Liberate St Abbaddon" ;

ALSO NOTING that Lenlyvit has served as a Tactical Officer and achieved distinctions in Ten Thousand Islands Treaty Organization (TITO), the regional military of Ten Thousand Islands, a region commended for the same by this august body (SC Resolution #30);

CONSIDERING Lenlyvit's role of Warden Commander in The Grey Wardens, during which time over 600 regions were liberated, defended or restored to their original condition;

APPRECIATING Lenlyvit's role in the liberation of Eireann, St Abbaddon, The Monarchic Entente and many other founderless and defenseless regions;

ACKNOWLEDGING Lenlyvit's role as the Commander of FORGE, an inter-regional military organization, which later evolved into SWORD which merged with AIR, which later played an important role in the liberation of Westphalia;

FURTHER ACKNOWLEDGING Lenlyvit as the founder of The Hole to Hide In, which has grown into a rather vast hub of roleplay and stays non-aligned despite the founder's strong defender ties;

ACCOUNTING FOR Lenlyvit's contributions to this august body, including:
a. co-authoring SC Resolution #218 "Liberate South Pacific", which was instrumental in saving one of the oldest regions from becoming overtaken
b. authoring SC Resolution #242 "Commend Texas", which recognized and appreciated the efforts of Texas towards defenderdom, both past and present, and
c. authoring SC Resolution #245 "Liberate KAISSERREICH", which attacked the region's Nazi propaganda and spurred multiple debates in the SC;
d. authoring SC Resolution #253 "Liberate The Monarchic Entente", submitted by their colony Bovitt Cay, which plead for the liberation of a region captured by multiple invading forces, thereby keeping alive the attempt to save this founderless region;

EMPHASIZING the radical shift in the treatment of Nazi and fascist regions after the passage of SC Resolution #245, which led to the liberation such of Nazi Europa (SC Resolution #246), among many other debates in the Security Council on the liberation of other raider-aligned regions as well;

BELIEVING Lenlyvit's work thus far has been consistent in spirit with the WA Security Council's best hopes to engender interregional peace and goodwill;

HEREBY Commends Lenlyvit.

---

This is a very basic rough draft. Any edits appreciated.

[Wrapper]

among their contributions in the SC forums which have helped shape many other resolutions brought to vote

This should be reworded. As written, to me it plainly refers to the electronic entity, and would violate Rule 4(c). It also doesn't flow well with the rest of the paragraph.

[Kozmix]

Thank you. That shall be amended.

[Feux]

Did you write this yourself?

[Kozmix]

Did you write this yourself?

Yes, I have. While I have asked around the necessary people for information, this has been written by me.

[Benevolent Thomas]

Wow! You've got a future in the SC, Kozmix. This is very well written and quite impressive document. I won't say anything negative about the nominee, as I believe they are a nation that is well intended and deserving of some sort of recognition for their efforts, but at the same time I don't believe I could support commending them quite yet. Lenly definitely has the potential to be a nation worthy of international praise, but I believe we've yet to be graced by their greatest works.

Benevolent Thomas
WA Delegate of Fort Triumph

Again, I wan't to say that you're an excellent author, Kozmix. I'd love to see you churn out more high quality proposals like this one.

[Kozmix]

Wow! You've got a future in the SC, Kozmix. This is very well written and quite impressive document. I won't say anything negative about the nominee, as I believe they are a nation that is well intended and deserving of some sort of recognition for their efforts, but at the same time I don't believe I could support commending them quite yet. Lenly definitely has the potential to be a nation worthy of international praise, but I believe we've yet to be graced by their greatest works.

Benevolent Thomas
WA Delegate of Fort Triumph

Again, I wan't to say that you're an excellent author, Kozmix. I'd love to see you churn out more high quality proposals like this one.

Thank you so much for your kind words BT. I shall definitely consider the same.

While keeping the consideration, the recently passed "Liberate the Monarchic Entente" has been added as well.

[Unibot III]

Lovely work, Kozmix!

I'll also add that Lenlyvit was a TRR Speaker. His contributions to TRR might be worth mentioning in a resolution.

I've made some markup below, hope you don't mind ...

___________________________________________________________

NOTING the nation of Lenlyvit's numerous contributions to the Security Council and to protecting and defending regions which are not capable of doing the same themselves;

A stylistic change but "the nation of" and "which are" are unnecessary.

RECOGNIZING Lenlyvit's immense efforts in the founding, creation and development of The Union of Democratic States Armed Forces (UDSAF);

Absolutely, but I would suggest including a list of what founding a military entails. I think people think it's like pushing a magic button and bam, it's created. Founding a military means spending hours of your time, recruiting, organizing and training new troops, establishing a chain of command, a "brand," and directing missions.

FURTHER RECOGNIZING that UDSAF has hence played crucial supporting roles in multiple major liberations including that of St Abbaddon, which was liberated by this august body;

St Abbaddon is how it's spelt, not St. Abbadon. (I used to get that wrong so much, I think I may have caused a diplomatic incident.) The "liberated by this august body" could be confusing for low-information readers, because they might read it and go "but wait, if SC liberated St. Abbaddon, why did it have to liberated by UDSAF!??" I would suggest rewording along the lines of ...

FURTHER RECOGNIZING that UDSAF has played crucial supporting roles in multiple major liberations including that of St Abbaddon. The foreign occupation of St. Abbaddon prompted intervention and condemnation from the WA Security Council in a number of resolutions including SC Resolution #189, "Liberate St Abbaddon" ;

ALSO NOTING that Lenlyvit has served as a Tactical Officer and achieved distinctions in Ten Thousand Islands Treaty Organization (TITO), the regional military of Ten Thousand Islands, a region commended for the same by this august body (SC Resolution #30);

CONSIDERING Lenlyvit's role of Warden Commander in The Grey Wardens, during which time over 600 regions were liberated, defended or restored to their original condition;

APPRECIATING Lenlyvit's role in the liberation of Eireann, St Abbaddon, The Monarchic Entente and many other founderless and defenseless regions;

ACKNOWLEDGING Lenlyvit's role as the Commander of FORGE, an inter-regional military organization, which later evolved into SWORD which merged with AIR, which later played an important role in the liberation of Westphalia;

FURTHER ACKNOWLEDGING Lenlyvit as the founder of The Hole to Hide In, which has grown into a rather vast hub of roleplay and stays non-aligned despite the founder's strong defender ties;

Some notes - spelling mistakes on roleplay and St Abbaddon. Resolution should be capitalized. And stick to "august body" when you do use the phrase. It's a thing.

ACCOUNTING for Lenlyvit's contributions to the WA Security Council, including:
a. co-authoring SC Resolution #218 "Liberate South Pacific", which was instrumental in saving one of the oldest regions from becoming overtaken,
b. authoring SC Resolution #242 "Commend Texas", which recognized and appreciated the efforts of Texas towards defenderdom, both past and present, and
c. authoring SC Resolution #245 "Liberate KAISSERREICH", which attacked the region's Nazi propaganda and spurred important debates in the SC;

"For" isn't apart of the preamblatory verb. End each line with a comma. 'Appreciated' seems ill-suited for that particular sentence. And I felt it was right to emphasize the important of the KAISSERREICH debates.

KNOWING that the Security Council's motto is "Spreading interregional peace and goodwill, via force if necessary", which is, in essence, the embodiment of Lenlyvit's work thus far;

I found this clause a bit of clunky phrase - perhaps...

BELIEVING Lenlyvit's work thus far has been consistent in spirit with the WA Security Council's best hopes to engender interregional peace and goodwill;

HEREBY Commends Lenlyvit.

Always end on a full-stop!

[Kozmix]

Thank you so much for your help Unibot III, I have made most of those edits. I am working on the TRR aspect of it right now, I'll make the major edit soon enough.

Very grateful for your help!

[Tupelope]

NOTING Lenlyvit's numerous contributions to the Security Council and to protecting and defending regions not capable of doing the same themselves;

RECOGNIZING Lenlyvit's immense efforts in the founding, creation and development of The Union of Democratic States Armed Forces (UDSAF);

FURTHER RECOGNIZING that UDSAF has played crucial supporting roles in multiple major liberations including that of St Abbaddon. The foreign occupation of St. Abbaddon prompted intervention and condemnation from the WA Security Council in a number of resolutions including SC Resolution #189, "Liberate St Abbaddon" ;

how long did the USDAF last and what other major liberations did they take part in. also participating in and planning ops are 2 totally different things. any joe nobody can participate in ops and hitting move isnt commendation worth

CONSIDERING Lenlyvit's role of Warden Commander in The Grey Wardens, during which time over 600 regions were liberated, defended or restored to their original condition;

that 600 number is a product of chasing which has greatly inflated actual worthwhile operation statistics.

ACCOUNTING FOR Lenlyvit's contributions to this august body, including:
a. co-authoring SC Resolution #218 "Liberate South Pacific", which was instrumental in saving one of the oldest regions from becoming overtaken
b. authoring SC Resolution #242 "Commend Texas", which recognized and appreciated the efforts of Texas towards defenderdom, both past and present, and
c. authoring SC Resolution #245 "Liberate KAISSERREICH", which attacked the region's Nazi propaganda and spurred multiple debates in the SC;
d. authoring SC Resolution #253 "Liberate The Monarchic Entente", submitted by their colony Bovitt Cay, which plead for the liberation of a region captured by multiple invading forces, thereby keeping alive the attempt to save this founderless region;

those jokes of proposals like 245 should not be commendation worthy

all in all this is too early and there are plenty of other more notable defenders who would deserve a commendation before leny does, even tho he has some accomplishments.

[Benevolent Thomas]

any joe nobody can participate in ops and hitting move isnt commendation worth

I disagree with this sentiment. Any joe could do it, but the vast majority of them don't. I think it is very commendable to take the time out of your day for the benefit of other players while most let apathy get in the way of an international sense of morality. I do agree that planning operations is a massive step above general participation, but I'll gladly commend anyone that has participated in a significant number of operations that has lead to the liberation of regions from hostile occupying forces.

I find myself to be in agreement with most of your other arguments. The problem with guys like us saying "there are others more deserving" is that, for the most part, we never get around to commending them. I'm going to steer off-topic a slight bit and thank Unibot for his efforts in his Ideas thread, which introduces aspiring authors to potential nominees that they may not have known about before. I may have had issues with the nation in the past, but that's a total class move by Unibot.

[Tupelope]

any joe nobody can participate in ops and hitting move isnt commendation worth

I disagree with this sentiment. Any joe could do it, but the vast majority of them don't. I think it is very commendable to take the time out of your day for the benefit of other players while most let apathy get in the way of an international sense of morality. I do agree that planning operations is a massive step above general participation, but I'll gladly commend anyone that has participated in a significant number of operations that has lead to the liberation of regions from hostile occupying forces.

1 commendation then plz

in a more serious note the problem with the first part is that from what i personally have scene recently i get like mayb at the most 12 hour notice of a "big op", or in the case of england no notice or ask to be on at all. so saying they are takin time out of their day is kinda disingenuous imo cuz if they on for update odds are they are participatin in a lib if there is one or something

[Benevolent Thomas]

1 commendation then plz

in a more serious note the problem with the first part is that from what i personally have scene recently i get like mayb at the most 12 hour notice of a "big op", or in the case of england no notice or ask to be on at all. so saying they are takin time out of their day is kinda disingenuous imo cuz if they on for update odds are they are participatin in a lib if there is one or something

Well, I meant as a part of a greater record of accomplishments. If you have some great accolades in addition to having participated in a good number of liberations, I'll gladly give you the nod.

As you said, it seems to be a more recent problem (likely summer lull), you should take it up with those currently charged with running the defender militaries. If you've got plenty of experience liberating, maybe you could run an op in the future (if you haven't already). I know that before I retired from GP, we'd have around a dozen or less people on a night for update, but when a region was on the line, we'd at least triple that. Many of who log into their computers at strange hours, even setting up alarms to wake them up in the middle of the night/morning. This sacrifice should be celebrated when its done in the name of peace and goodwill.

Edit: I guess I should have actually made the point that, normally, operations have at least 24 hours of notice if not more. I'll go poke the young guns with my walking stick.

[Kozmix]

After considering the few comments here, and speaking to some NS GP veterans, I have decided to withdraw this draft as of now, and hold on to it until the time is right.

Thank you all for taking the time to look into this draft and for your suggestions. It means a lot.

EDIT: fixed the intended connotation. I am in no way removing my support from what I believe is a justified nominee, I am simply withdrawing the draft based on advice and thought.

[Feux]

Did you write this yourself?

Yes, I have. While I have asked around the necessary people for information, this has been written by me.

I have a really hard time believing your semi new nation wrote this because I've seen countless people attempt a SC proposal with no previous experience and they never turn out like this. So whether you did or not, just given the circumstances and the numerous times I've seen it happen, it makes me think this either isn't your first nation, someone wrote this for you, or worse, Lenlyvit wrote it himself. So I would have advised against this on those grounds alone. I'm going to need to see more and different content from you before I plainy praise talent like some of these other dudes in this thread.

[Unibot III]

Thank you so much for your help Unibot III, I have made most of those edits. I am working on the TRR aspect of it right now, I'll make the major edit soon enough.

Very grateful for your help!

I was wrong about the TRR stuff btw, got the position mixed up.

[Ransium]

Yes, I have. While I have asked around the necessary people for information, this has been written by me.

I have a really hard time believing your semi new nation wrote this because I've seen countless people attempt a SC proposal with no previous experience and they never turn out like this. So whether you did or not, it makes me think this either isn't your first nation, someone wrote this for you, or worse, Lenlyvit wrote it himself. So I would have advised against this on those grounds alone. I'm going to need to see more and different content from you before I plainy praise talent like some of these other dudes in this thread.

I think you’re too cynical,although I certainly had help (as almost every successful draft does) I wrote commend Yggdrasil myself, and although it was probably the worst resolution I’ve written it still passed. If you’re reasonably intelligent and read the rules anyway can draft decent proposals on a first go.

[Benevolent Thomas]

Yes, I have. While I have asked around the necessary people for information, this has been written by me.

I have a really hard time believing your semi new nation wrote this because I've seen countless people attempt a SC proposal with no previous experience and they never turn out like this. So whether you did or not, just given the circumstances and the numerous times I've seen it happen, it makes me think this either isn't your first nation, someone wrote this for you, or worse, Lenlyvit wrote it himself. So I would have advised against this on those grounds alone. I'm going to need to see more and different content from you before I plainy praise talent like some of these other dudes in this thread.

Kozmix is from 10000 Islands. Its likely that he's written numerous high quality posts before venturing out onto the NS forum, as their regional culture has historically discouraged its members from posting here.

[Feux]

I have a really hard time believing your semi new nation wrote this because I've seen countless people attempt a SC proposal with no previous experience and they never turn out like this. So whether you did or not, it makes me think this either isn't your first nation, someone wrote this for you, or worse, Lenlyvit wrote it himself. So I would have advised against this on those grounds alone. I'm going to need to see more and different content from you before I plainy praise talent like some of these other dudes in this thread.

I think you’re too cynical,although I certainly had help (as almost every successful draft does) I wrote commend Yggdrasil myself, and although it was probably the worst resolution I’ve written it still passed. If you’re reasonably intelligent and read the rules anyway can draft decent proposals on a first go.

Too cynical on NationStates? Besides, a healthy amount of suspicion is a good thing.

[Feux]

I have a really hard time believing your semi new nation wrote this because I've seen countless people attempt a SC proposal with no previous experience and they never turn out like this. So whether you did or not, just given the circumstances and the numerous times I've seen it happen, it makes me think this either isn't your first nation, someone wrote this for you, or worse, Lenlyvit wrote it himself. So I would have advised against this on those grounds alone. I'm going to need to see more and different content from you before I plainy praise talent like some of these other dudes in this thread.

Kozmix is from 10000 Islands. Its likely that he's written numerous high quality posts before venturing out onto the NS forum, as their regional culture has historically discouraged its members from posting here.

High quality posts in a foreign forum have little to do with this WA, but they would certainly help his case. I'd like to know more about his time in 10000 Islands. EDIT: Also, had a serious Déjà vu moment replying to you. No idea why.

Further Edit: Just a writing tip so all my posts in this thread aren't useless naysaying: The clauses that have "something something something, which something something something." They are fine, but I would try to avoid using that phrasing back to back with the clauses. It reads kind of weird from my perspective, and I think some phrasing variety would be good.

[Isvataan]

Against, these individual nation should be forgotten forever

[The Noble Thatcherites]

Against, these individual nations should be forgotten forever

Why multiple nations?

[Alkasia]

Yes, I have. While I have asked around the necessary people for information, this has been written by me.

I have a really hard time believing your semi new nation wrote this because I've seen countless people attempt a SC proposal with no previous experience and they never turn out like this. So whether you did or not, just given the circumstances and the numerous times I've seen it happen, it makes me think this either isn't your first nation, someone wrote this for you, or worse, Lenlyvit wrote it himself. So I would have advised against this on those grounds alone. I'm going to need to see more and different content from you before I plainy praise talent like some of these other dudes in this thread.

I've known Kozmix the entirety of his time on NS (and I'm pretty certain it's his first nation), and I can say with confidence that this proposal is the result of his own work. I've seen his writing skills before through emissary reports, interviews, and legislative discussion, and this is well within his skill level.

High quality posts in a foreign forum have little to do with this WA, but they would certainly help his case. I'd like to know more about his time in 10000 Islands.

Gladly. He joined the regional forums on November 9th, the day after his founding. From the start, he was highly enthusiastic and engaged, immediately getting involved in TITO, the government, and cultural events. He was so involved that he won the Rookie of the Quarter award, which is tough to win indeed. If you are specifically interested in his writing skills, he is our current Poet Laureate, writes our monthly Emissary Reports, and is a journalist for a regional newspaper called The Mad Surfer (I'm not sure which parts of this edition were written by him, but both Kozmix's and Jabberwocky's writing skills can be seen, so it's fine ). He also writes economic reports called the Mortimer Reports. Unfortunately I cannot share Council discussions with you, but I can vouch for his skills in coming up with sound ideas and actual legislative drafting.

Beyond his writing skills, he is a TITO Knight, a Senator in our government, Recruiter, Welcome Buddy, and Deputy Regional Reserve Chairman (does a lot with the economy).

Hope this helps!

[Glacikaldr]

Thank you for standing up for my 'recently sonned' NS son Alk. I hope to see more from XKI over on this forum and in the WA in the future. You're the Delegate of an extremely talented region and community.

Maybe it's about time XKI gets a second commendation?

[Marilyn Manson Freaks]

Lenly has also most recently been Outreach Officer of TRR. I'm glad you withdrew this, Lenly is great, but I don't see him worthy of a commendation yet.