[DRAFT] Repeal "Condemn omigodtheykilledkenny"

[The Lanthanides]

The Security Council,

BELIEVING that the previously passed resolution, "Condemn Omigodtheykilledkenny", was passed in haste and without full and proper consideration,

FURTHER BELIEVING that Omigodtheykilledkenny's condemnation should therefore be, at a minimum, reconsidered,

ACKNOWLEDGING that Omigodtheykilledkenny's domestic policy may or may not be worthy of condemnation, however

NOTING that Omigodtheykilledkenny has not done anything explicitly wrong with regard to foreign policy,

RECALLING that the mission of the Security Council is to spread "interregional peace and goodwill, using force if necessary",

NOTING WITH DEEP CONCERN that Omigodtheykilledkenny's condemnation violates this mission,

STILL FURTHER BELIEVING that, for the aforementioned reasons, Omigodtheykilledkenny's international status is worthy of reconsideration,

HEREBY REPEALS "Condemn omigodtheykilledkenny".

[Chester Pearson]

It's been tried, and failed. Almost passed though, until Kenny launched a massive campaign to keep his badge....

[Tano]

No.

That is all.

[Ramaeus]

AGAINST. You posted your adspam on our RMB, through an embassy of ours, no less. So I will happily vote against ANY proposal that you write in the near future.

[The Lanthanides]

The 40000th post on this forum:

Just because I adspammed doesn't mean my proposal is bad. Give me REAL advice.

[British Grand Pacific]

The 40000th post on this forum:

Just because I adspammed doesn't mean my proposal is bad. Give me REAL advice.

Be a better international citizen and you'll garner better international support in all things.

[PrussianEmpire]

The 40000th post on this forum:

Just because I adspammed doesn't mean my proposal is bad. Give me REAL advice.

Adspamming pisses people. Adspamming makes people hate you. Adspamming makes people think that you're a noob that doesn't deserve any respect.

[The Lanthanides]

SORRY! I was only copying and pasting information I was telegramming to other people anyway! I really don't see why everyone is so opposed to adspam. I don't even get why it's CALLED adspam! Anyway, could any of you tell me what you think about this resolution?

[PrussianEmpire]

SORRY! I was only copying and pasting information I was telegramming to other people anyway! I really don't see why everyone is so opposed to adspam. I don't even get why it's CALLED adspam! Anyway, could any of you tell me what you think about this resolution?

Because it's an ad and it's spam. It's not welcomed on regions RMBs and it's not welcomed in our TGs.

[Terravoss]

Just because I adspammed doesn't mean my proposal is bad. Give me REAL advice.

Yeah, yeah it is. You have a whole bunch of fluff, that doesn't even come close to addressing the actual condemnation. You also realize spamming your proposal on peoples RMB's is likely to get it pulled, and you booted right?

Take a look at THIS try, which is far better than yours, and it failed, although not by much. And before you ask, no you do not have permission to use any clauses out of it.

[Omigodtheykilledkenny]

Take a look at THIS try, which is far better than yours, and it failed, although not by much.

What do you mean "not by much"? It got stomped by more than 4,000 votes. What? Did you get so depressed during the vote that you were completely hammered by the time it ended or something?

[Todd McCloud]

Against.

[The Lanthanides]

Kenny, why are you so opposed to the removal of your ugly Condemnation badge? We want to replace it with a Commendation badge for all the good work you've done for the NationStates community. Do you want to be condemned, because if so, I'll immediately stop considering this proposal. But if you're so much as apathetic, then I'm so going to propose this. So please reply.

[Wrapper]

Oh, HELL NO. Not after he had us all kicked in the nuts.

[Albrook]

Oh, HELL NO. Not after he had us all kicked in the nuts.

That's an awesome way to end a resolution. Just because of that line alone I'm against this proposal. Keep on rocking that condemnation badge, Kenny. xD

[Elke and Elba]

Oh, HELL NO. Not after he had us all kicked in the nuts.

That's an awesome way to end a resolution. Just because of that line alone I'm against this proposal. Keep on rocking that condemnation badge, Kenny. xD

That makes The Lanthanides' position extremely tricky, given that the delegate proposed a new Max Barry Day proposal on the GA.

Now, hasn't the kick in the nuts make you resolute not to repeal this?

[Terravoss]

Kenny, why are you so opposed to the removal of your ugly Condemnation badge? We want to replace it with a Commendation badge for all the good work you've done for the NationStates community.

You do realize his condemnation doesn't need to be repealed in order to commend him right?

Do you want to be condemned, because if so, I'll immediately stop considering this proposal. But if you're so much as apathetic, then I'm so going to propose this. So please reply.

And yet you submitted it already? It won't make quorum, and even if it does, it will be blown out of the water. I really wish the newbs would listen sometimes.

[Sedgistan]

This proposal has been removed for violating Rule 2(d):

(d) Repeals should address the contents of the resolution they're repealing, and not by just stating the reverse of the arguments given in the resolution.

[Tano]

Kenny, why are you so opposed to the removal of your ugly Condemnation badge? We want to replace it with a Commendation badge for all the good work you've done for the NationStates community.

You do realize his condemnation doesn't need to be repealed in order to commend him right?

Do you want to be condemned, because if so, I'll immediately stop considering this proposal. But if you're so much as apathetic, then I'm so going to propose this. So please reply.

And yet you submitted it already? It won't make quorum, and even if it does, it will be blown out of the water. I really wish the newbs would listen sometimes.

It definitely helps, yeah

[Omigodtheykilledkenny]

Captain Chiang sat serenely behind her desk. It was shaping up to be the perfect day at the office, with invariably minimal damage to sort. Susa had satisfied her plentifully that morning and for once was too tired to march into the GA to threaten to kill everyone, and had drifted peacefully off to sleep. There were no boneheaded diplomatic gaffes she would have to apologize for that afternoon, and for the first time in a very long while, there were no imagined slights by the Ardchoilleans to deal with. It almost seemed like she'd be able to relax in the Strangers' Bar with her usual Jameson on ice that evening, without worrying over how to diffuse some manufactured crisis the next day. The only thing that could possibly ruin her mood would be for Jack Riley to storm into her office, ranting about some stupid proposal being considered by the Security Council.

"Captain! There's a proposal in the Security Council that I think merits your attention!" Riley trumpeted as he burst through her door.

Chiang groaned loudly at this predictable turn of events and tried to bury her head in her desk.

"For once, fortune is smiling upon us and we have an opportunity to finally repeal that pesky condemnation of ours!" the secretary said as he slapped some papers in front of the captain.

The commander rolled her eyes as she pondered the quickest way to end this conversation and get back to making fun of poorer countries on Twitter. "They try to repeal our condemnation nearly every other week," she sighed.

"I know," said Riley, "but this time I think we can win them over with a big--"

"Oh God."

"--Stripper Commando dance number!"

"Ugh."

"Uhh, OK. Joking. Joking. We'll save that for when we're desperate. But I really think now's the time to--"

Chiang held up her hand to silence the irritatingly enthused Riley. "Look, Mr. Secretary, I think by now it's pretty clear that a repeal of our condemnation is about as likely as another Max Barry Day resolution coming down the pike..."

"Actually, funny you should say that--"

"Quiet!" Chiang spat. "But really, it's the Security Council! Who the fuck cares?!"

"OK, OK, look, I get it, alright?" Riley conceded. "The SC's obsession with us is growing a bit tiresome--"

"A bit tiresome?!" Chiang fumed.

"--but...I truly think that if we can finally wipe this, er, shitstain off the books, then they might finally give up and move on to some other poor, unfortunate condemnee. The people behind this repeal effort actually think we're an internationally respected, reasonable, non-pariah, non-oppressive regime! And for their project to succeed, we need only convince the world that that's the case!"

Chiang only glared at Riley. "You mean lie?"

"Oh, no. Not lie, Captain. Merely 'manipulate the truth.' For example, our systematic slaughter of dolphins over international waters...we just gloss over that by producing the Palentine dolphins from the shark tank in our front office, whom we've never harmed, and will actually profess our love for aquatic mammals...in the most shocking, ear-splitting, profane way possible, of course, but still..."

The captain wanted only to sink into the floor and forget this conference ever took place. "And our suicidal 1,000%-percent increase of fossil-fuel emissions eight or nine years ago?" she interjected unenthusiastically. "Which in the process vastly poisoned the air, killed off three or four subspecies of penguin, and converted much of the ice shelves in the Antarctic to muddy sludge? What about that?"

"All completely legal under international law," Riley replied, with the tone of a used-car salesman about to throw in a free polymer finish on top of a no-payments-till-2019 deal. "The CSA worked overtime to assure us of that one."

"What about all those noisy torture sessions with a terror detainee in the captain's office every night, which the neighbors are always calling to complain about?" Chiang flushed as Riley looked over his shoulder to behold Jimmy standing at the door, waiting for his 1:00 appointment. "How do we explain that away?" he smiled devilishly.

Riley paused. "Uhhh, I think we can just call that what it is: kinky sex," he finally said. "Speaking of which, Captain, if we have any hope of preserving our reputation before the repeal comes to vote, you'll have to keep a close eye on your boy and make sure he does not blow up the Security Council again--"

An adolescent voice issuing from Chiang's office television, permanently tuned in to WA proceedings, interrupted the secretary: "I am the servant of the Lord God, that all you sorry-ass infidel jerks may know his Infinite Justice! Ahhhhh yeahhhhh!" *KABLAMMO!*

"Fuck."

[Shadow Afforess]

FOR. Kenny is just an attention-who... seeker.

[Golgothastan]

Only using the first half of the word - that's a clever way of getting around the rules on flaming, you cunning person!

---

THE TELEVISION TIMES

Letters To The Editor

Dear Sir,

I was extremely concerned by the seeming plot hole on the soap opera "World Assembly" in last night's episode. The plan to repeal the Condemnation of the Federal Republic because (in what I regarded as a rather weak line of dialogue) they have "not done anything explicitly wrong with regard to foreign policy" appears to completely to overlook the Chechnya incident in the highly rated 2005-2006 "Anti-Terrorism Act" story arc. The Invasion of Chechnya by the Federal Republic, the Holy Wenaist Sultanate, the Sultanate of Cluichstan, and the Whatever Cobdenia Called Themselves, made for some of the best television Golgothastan has seen since EuroTurnip 2002. Are we really to believe the writers of "World Assembly" have simply forgotten about this important plot point? Or are they retconning it out of history? What about the Stripper Commandos, the Baaattalions of Baaattle Goats, the frickin' Death Star? What about the Chechnistanians??? I hope that this storyline will be resolved without whitewashing the history of one of the nations that still makes the "World Assembly" worth watching. And/or Commander Chiang finally getting her jugs out.

Seriously...

Yours,
Sven-Östein Evuson
Bláþráður

[Bubblekirby]

For, does Kenny really need what to him is a badge of honor?

[Omigodtheykilledkenny]

attention-who... seeker.

[rolls eyes with supreme annoyance]

Alright, for the last time we're strippers, not whores! How many times do need to say this? If the delegate wishes to pay for companionship - and they have our deepest sympathies if they do; the evidence suggests they can't count on their personality alone - they will have to inquire elsewhere. Thank you

~Capt. Chiang

[The Lanthanides]

Kenny, I can see why you're condemned now. I will never get why you WANT to be condemned, but if that's what you wish, then so be it, I guess...