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[DRAFT] Commend The Church of Satan

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Clorinda
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[DRAFT] Commend The Church of Satan

Postby Clorinda » Thu Jan 13, 2022 3:59 pm

The Security Council,

Appreciating that since their foundation in 2013, The Church of Satan (CoS) has continually presented themselves as a respectable and cultured nation - a light in the darkness of stagnancy,

Hearkening back to CoS’ humble arrival in The Rejected Realms (TRR) following their banishment from 10000 Islands for their hellish and admittedly less-than-savory pseudonym, where they quickly got involved in the community, both as a participant and nurturer, two roles they have continued to hold to this day,

Pinpointing the early interest CoS held in The Rejected Times (TRT), which led to them holding a prominent role in international journalism in the years to come, and following their many accomplishments during their time in TRT, both as a member and as a leader, which includes (but is not limited to):
  • the creation of its official radio station, Rejected Radio, where they provided an avenue for struggling independent musicians to promote their work and interviewed notable figures on regional and international happenings,
  • serving in an unelected position as Editor-In-Chief while the elected Media Officer has been vacant, in order to ensure that publications went forth in a timely and efficient manner, in which they oversaw the writing, revision, and public release of hundreds of articles, and
  • raising awareness about epilepsy, a neurological disorder known to cause seizures, memory loss, and death, via TRT and its outlets annually,

Applauding the lengths to which CoS went to in order to continue to serve TRR, beyond their capacity as a media entrepreneur, the most prominent of which include:
  • World Assembly Delegate between March 5 and December 19 2017, a time where they served as the face of the region and its foremost representative, during which they negotiated a recruitment deal with all five feeders, and organized interregional events including the Celestial Unicorn Lampshade Festival (CULT), which strengthened TRR’s relationship with The South Pacific and Lazarus,
  • Officer for a total of nine times under various portfolios, in which they continued their role in releasing TRT issues, organized TRR’s booth for the NationStates World Fair on multiple occasions, spearheaded recruitment efforts which bolstered TRR’s numbers, bringing the region to new heights, led Rejectmas and other holiday celebrations, and established adventurous events like “Life of a Wizard” and “NOLA is Burning”, and,
  • Speaker of the Assembly and Vice-Delegate.

Lauding CoS’ dedication to holding of public office across three governments of Lazarus: serving under the People's Republic of Lazarus as Chief of Police, Judicial District Governor, and Cultural District Governor; under the (Humane) Republic of Lazarus as Minister of Foreign Affairs and Grandee Secretary (Vice-Delegate); and under the Celestial Union of Lazarus as Holy Prelate (Head of the Judiciary),

Praising the impish nation’s cultural contributions to Wintreath as its Thane of Foreign Affairs, where they created and distributed many puzzles to Wintreath’s partners that provoked regional interest as well as thought,

Hailing CoS' commitment to Renegade Islands Alliance, which allowed them to contribute in a more creative way, holding titles such as Senator of the House of Sauropods, Rex of the House of Sauropods, Princeratops of the House of Sauropods, Member of the Commerce Committee, Mentor, Internal Affairs Officer, and Foreign Affairs Officer,

Accentuating CoS’ contributions as an early member of The Rejected Realms Historical Society, which included assisting in the maintenance of TRR’s Library of Spurned Knowledge, editing biographies of notable Rejects, and helping uncover material surrounding the various Atlantic invasions of TRR, and

Believing that, much like the other humble nations who have sponsored the arts and allowed for great cultural works to be brought upon the world, CoS has earned themselves a spot among the greats and should thus be recognized for their achievements,


Hereby commends The Church of Satan.


Just a reworked version of my draft from 2018. I’m aware it’s a little list-ish in parts and could use more content but I thought I’d create an official thread for this. Critique it please. :)
Last edited by Clorinda on Thu Jan 13, 2022 4:04 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Apatosaurus II
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Founded: Oct 01, 2021
Democratic Socialists

Postby Apatosaurus II » Thu Jan 13, 2022 4:11 pm

Clorinda wrote:Hearkening back to CoS’ humble arrival in The Rejected Realms (TRR) following their banishment from 10000 Islands for their hellish and admittedly less-than-savory pseudonym, where they quickly got involved in the community, both as a participant and nurturer, two roles they have continued to hold to this day,

I think this is fluffy and not really necessary, to be honest. Either cut this or use something less verbose, like this:
Hearkening back to CoS' humble arrival in [region=the Rejected Realms] (TRR) following their banishment from [region=10000 Islands], where they have since become an important pillar of the community as a participant and nurturer,


Clorinda wrote:Pinpointing the early interest CoS held in The Rejected Times (TRT)

Don't like this wording, try something like "Extolling CoS' initial work in The Rejected Times (TRT)" or smth.

Clorinda wrote:Speaker of the Assembly and Vice-Delegate.

Anything they did in this position?

Clorinda wrote:Lauding CoS’ dedication to holding of public office across three governments of Lazarus: serving under the People's Republic of Lazarus as Chief of Police, Judicial District Governor, and Cultural District Governor; under the (Humane) Republic of Lazarus as Minister of Foreign Affairs and Grandee Secretary (Vice-Delegate); and under the Celestial Union of Lazarus as Holy Prelate (Head of the Judiciary),

Boring position listing. Add more detail as to what they did, or cut some filler by just keeping the most important ones and elaborating on them.

Clorinda wrote:Hailing CoS' commitment to Renegade Islands Alliance, which allowed them to contribute in a more creative way, holding titles such as Senator of the House of Sauropods, Rex of the House of Sauropods, Princeratops of the House of Sauropods, Member of the Commerce Committee, Mentor, Internal Affairs Officer, and Foreign Affairs Officer,

What did they do in this position?
Last edited by Apatosaurus II on Thu Jan 13, 2022 4:15 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Outer Sparta
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Postby Outer Sparta » Fri Jan 14, 2022 4:36 pm

Decent start. I for one would cut out some fluff and go into detail about their more important achievements (based on your judgement). BTW, how many characters (including BBCode) is your draft?
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Hulldom
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Postby Hulldom » Fri Jan 14, 2022 6:05 pm

Outer Sparta wrote:Decent start. I for one would cut out some fluff and go into detail about their more important achievements (based on your judgement). BTW, how many characters (including BBCode) is your draft?

Put it through Word, I have it at ~4,057.
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Outer Sparta
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Postby Outer Sparta » Fri Jan 14, 2022 10:46 pm

Hulldom wrote:
Outer Sparta wrote:Decent start. I for one would cut out some fluff and go into detail about their more important achievements (based on your judgement). BTW, how many characters (including BBCode) is your draft?

Put it through Word, I have it at ~4,057.

That gives the author some space to work with if they choose to add more substance to it. Church of Satan can be argued that they are commendable, so I do see a potential path.
social democracy, environmental protection, universal healthcare, free college, social equality, LGBT, pro-choice,
GOP, corporate socialism, Trump, neoconservatism, white supremacy, extreme political views, corruption

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Clorinda
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Founded: Nov 12, 2021
Mother Knows Best State

Postby Clorinda » Fri Jan 14, 2022 10:47 pm

Outer Sparta wrote:
Hulldom wrote:Put it through Word, I have it at ~4,057.

That gives the author some space to work with if they choose to add more substance to it. Church of Satan can be argued that they are commendable, so I do see a potential path.


In the five years that I’ve known CoS I definitely can say he’s commendable. I just need to organize my thoughts. :P

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Outer Sparta
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Founded: Dec 26, 2014
Democratic Socialists

Postby Outer Sparta » Fri Jan 14, 2022 10:54 pm

Clorinda wrote:
Outer Sparta wrote:That gives the author some space to work with if they choose to add more substance to it. Church of Satan can be argued that they are commendable, so I do see a potential path.


In the five years that I’ve known CoS I definitely can say he’s commendable. I just need to organize my thoughts. :P

I won't make any judgement for now on supporting or opposing, but I do believe CoS is arguably commendable and making your case well will help that cause.
social democracy, environmental protection, universal healthcare, free college, social equality, LGBT, pro-choice,
GOP, corporate socialism, Trump, neoconservatism, white supremacy, extreme political views, corruption


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