You know you are...

[Epicnopolis]

...you are person

THEN WHO WAS PHONE?

IDK MAN. IDK. THE SHROOMS MAN!!!

[Hurtful Thoughts]

You may be from No Endorse if:

... you've played at least 3 rounds of strip-thermonuclear-war.

You may be Hurtian if:

... you've been 'detained' under suspicion of being a terrorist, just because you were on that unchartered plane made of bamboo and powered by coal slurry, that just crashed on the tarmac with a belly full of small-arms you planned on giving to their children.

... You made it a point to visit and capitalize on every war-torn smoking glass-crater of NS.

... All of Haven doesn't know who's side you're on, so they ask you, three times. And you never gave them the same answer twice.

... You are deathly afraid of pen-lasers.

... Your sunglasses have an IR filter.

... Your favorite pasttime is digging.

... You are tasked with defending 'diaper hill' in the event your homeland is invaded.

... Your family hunts for dodoes with a grenade-launcher.

... Your shovel is stained in blood.

... Your residential chain-link fences are coated with a half-meter of concrete, sheathed in kevlar, with mud tamping on one side, and an anti-tank ditch on the other.

... You've never seen an auto-repair station, ever.

... Your bayonet works equally well as a shovel.

... You ride a military vehicle to work so it can use the carpool lane.

... You are 'high', right now.

... Your pistol is a rifle and is used as a can-opener, your rifle is considered artillery in some countries, and is smoothbore.

... Your anti-tank ditch is used as a repository for household and residential waste.

[Kablup]

You know you are from Kablup when
...you have more than three flies buzzing around your head at all times
...you have to shoo away a pack of wolves every time you leave your house
...weddings end in gunshots and screams
...the word "vacation" means hard labour while wearing a Hawaiian shirt
...your livestock beats you at chess
...a punch in the face is your preferred method of greeting someone
...your life savings are enough to buy one bag of oranges
...the air you exhale can be classified as "air pollution"
...your armpits are a complex ecosystem
...your first name is a job description, like "Gardener" or "Salesman"
...you can't decide which old rag to wear today

[The shee species]

You know you're a shee when...
-You have hacked into another country's defense network just because you were bored
-Your IQ is over 5000
-You consider a 99% an epic fail
-the Bible is in the Fiction section of the library
-You love tea and cookies more then life itself...
-You have a fully-stocked laboratory in your room and know how to use everything in it by the age of two.
-You have a slightly obsessive fondness for wearing crystals
-You have the materials and skills to make a nuke if you wanted to for some reason.
-Rather then using glasses or contact lenses you scanned your DNA, found the errant genes and fixed them. Indeed, this is precisely what happens - there are no opticians on Albia.
-

"I say, old chap, I'm on fire."
"Goodness gracious, I expect that hurts. I'll design a device to pump water from the eastern ocean up to here. You get the kettle on." "Splendid. Sugar, Milk?"

That sounded perfectly like something you might hear anywhere...
-Your computer, car, home, whatever look and feel like a Jules Verne illustrated novel - a mixture of tubes, escaping steam and pure brute force mixed with incredibly advanced biotech components and often is smarter then some humans.
-You keep hundreds of pet norns you made using the lab's bioengineering equipment...
-You keep hundreds of ettins, bioengineered workers to do household tasks which due to the way their brains are set up they love to do.
-You hear horror stories about the messed-up bioengineering experiment know as the grendels...
-You burn the flag to roast marshmallows
-You have a rabid hatred of grendels
-You spell incorrectly on the write-in ballot and accidently start a political party... which wins!
-your name takes up a sheet of paper due to all the titles, and your just middle-class!
-you walk into a bar and order tea
-your great-grandfather insists he can still drive a mecha even though he needs power-assisted limbs these days, and complains that Library Detail is a waste of his potential.
-you think "Nightmare on Elm Street" means Elm Street lost its wifi connection.
-You have to kneel to be able to look a baseline human in the eye
-You are a shee rather then a human
-The government takes every opportunity to have a public holiday (If one city hosts a pogo-stick championship, the entire country grinds to a halt)
-the internet is free and is a disaster if someone charges you for using it
-gay marriage is a constitutionally guaranteed right
-The local Sheriff's men find the moonshine...and they ask how much you charge for a gallon.
-You are either rich, or slightly rich. And you regard it as average.
-The average person makes more than ₮138000 yearly (about $100000 USD, when matching it to the Singapore dollar.)
-You hear a doctor say "Do no harm", and you wonder why he dropped the "Permanent" out.
-Your cat Mittens is made of 34% flesh, and 66% mechanics.
-Someone hands you an assault rifle, and you wonder where the hell the plasma casing is.
-You drink enough tea to make your urine brown.
-When life seems vaguely like a 1950's esque futuristic dreamworld....
-other nation's restrooms confuse you. Your restrooms terrify other nations.
-Military? What military?
-your hind-paws have retractable claws, just like your forepaws.
-You get worried if two days go day without some kind of party happening.
-You've wondered out loud more than once why foreign airlines insist on those big space-wasting wings on their jets as opposed to simple antigravity
-You've either successfully launched a rocket high enough that it went through a cloud or successfully blown all the feathers off a chicken with an explosion, also roasting said chicken with said explosion
-You know you don't need to match clothing colors, because rainbow is fun.
-You're easily distracted by - ooh, shiny!
-You wear a monocle, even if you do not need one.
-You will be outraged if your Gin and Tonic is not served on the rocks.
-You will become murderously outraged if the Tonic is carbonated water.
-You go big game hunting on a weekly basis.
-You are accustomed to cars and lorries being steam-powered
-When you, 100.000.000 people and The Emperor are running towards the local Video Game store screaming and jumping for joy whenever a new Halo game comes out
-You have accidentally blown something up with a homemade nuke
-Whenever you watch Star Trek, you automatically sympathize with the Vulcans for putting up with the stupid irrational humans
-You have met members of at least three nonhuman races, including yourself
-you feel free to talk back to your C.O, and s/he takes it without reprimanding you
-you consider a skyscraper under 120 stories to be poor use of airspace
- you tried to summon some sort of demon at least once in your life. It didn't work
- tourists mistake your capital city for a village
-you simply can’t wrap your head around the concept of homophobia
-The word "religion" doesn't make any sense to you, no matter how many times it's explained.
-All hotels are norn-friendly.
-All establishments, period, are norn-friendly.
-You will routinely go into work on a day off and work for free.
-The government provides free Wi-Fi to everyone, and you don't know why everyone doesn't have it like that.
-you have nightmares about standing up in front of your colleagues or classmates and realizing something's missing.. and it's your hat
- you've unleashed a plague of flying grendels on the populace because you were bored
- someone tells you a giant monster is destroying the village and you say "is it Thursday already?"
- you find your bed has no strange or poisonous creatures in it and are disappointed, your younger brother has run out of inspiration for tricks to play on you.
-All religions contained the explicit teaching "Women are exactly equal to men intellectually and morally and should be treated exactly the same" or are banned as discrimatory.
-Other nations have alligators in their sewage systems. Your nation has grendels.

[The Dark Domain]

You know you are Mage of The Dominion if...
- you have ever summoned a demon to get you a sandwich because you couldn't be bothered to call for a slave
- your older brother is torn apart by an unearthly horror and you're annoyed because you were planning to poison him tomorrow
- you went to your first orgy when you were eight
- and your parents took you
- you've every been forced to eat a bucket of frogs at school because you made a mistake conjuring lunch
- you've unleashed a plague of flying weasels on the populace because you were bored
- you were top of the class at school and you only had to assassinate three people to get there
- someone tells you a giant monster is destroying the village and you say "is it Thursday already?"
- you find your bed has no strange or poisonous creatures in it and are disappointed, your younger brother has run out of inspiration
- you spent from age 18 to age 40 naked and no-one thought it was strange
- your childhood pet was a vulture and it used to be your sister

You know you are Dominion Commoner if...
- at least one member of your family has been mutated for use as a beast of burden
- at least one of your family is a slave
- you carry a tennis racket in case of a flying weasel plague
- you ever agreed that the sky was purple to avoid slavery
- you've ever gotten out of the bath and run to the backyard to get a towel off the line then found yourself raped repeatedly over the next twenty four hours

[Nerezzath]

You know you're Nerezzathian if:
- You don't know the nation's population but you know it's GDP
- You can't count the number of jobs you work on one hand
- You've had planning permission turned down on the grounds that your proposal would go beyond Nerezzath's airspace
- You can legally smoke heroin but can't strike
- You live next door to a guy with a fish-tail
- You've ever lived in a treetop city
- You get a referendum on going to war

[Marshmellowstan]

You know your're a Marshallowstanian when
-you make millions a year and the government takes all of it
-you eat lots of sugary and fatty foods and don't get flab (we have geneticly modified all of our 1 billion plus population)
-12 year-olds kids are marching around with assault rifles
-you can't think of anything else to type

[Geilinor]

You know you are Geilinorian/ a Geilinorite if:
If someone asks you to do a favor, you say "What do I get for it?"
You love wearing suits
Your job is the most important thing in your life. Family, friends, kids, etc. aren't very important.
You think, "Yuck," when people say the word tradition.
Same as above when you hear the words community service or volunteering
You think religion is nonesense
You think every Muslim in the world is a terrorist
You hate poetry

[Voltyre]

You know you're from Voltyre when you...
...are in an Asylum for three weeks. Monthly.
...have twenty barbecues a month on average. And you eat turtles.
...you slap yourself for pleasure.
...you have a need for war (and speed) in peacetime.
...you're only racist to one thing: squirrels.
...when you devour peas and carrots for mid-mid second lunch.
...when your day is: wake up, eat, poop, watch TV, go to gym, eat, poop, watch TV, poop, poop, eat, sleep.
...when you own thirty-seven AK's and fifty double barrel semi-automatic 4-gauge shotties.
...when you laugh if you piss your pants.
...if you enjoy watching someone endure pain.
...if you think someone falling from the high wire is funny.
...if you hunt bears and wolves for two hours every three days.
...if you think having sex with your best friend and not your wife is fun. And your wife doesn't mind.

[KonataLand]

You know you are Konatalandian if...
...you can recite every line of every Haruhi work (including light novels, anime, etc.) from memory. In fact, it's a requirement for citizenship.
...you pray to Haruhi Suzumiya three times a day.
...and those prayers consist of watching the latest episode.
...rather than execution, you are sentenced to watching Endless Eight for two days straight.
...you kill your daughter if she does not grow up to look like a cuter version of her mother.
...you witness a public execution every other week.
...your bookshelves are covered in manga.
...you understand the glory of the Great Konata, and would give your life to protect Her Holiness.
...you don't know what the actual definition of "democracy" is.
...you fail to realize that the 'democracy' is actually a corrupt oligarchy ruled by a shadowy few.

[Voerdeland]

You know you are a Voerdelander if you...
...can't drive, and don't know anyone who can.
...see nothing wrong in 13 year-olds drinking beer
...as you don't consider beer to be a truly alcoholic beverage
...see nothing strange in teachers (and in some cases, students) smoking cigarettes during their classes
...consider capitalism to be an authoritarian system
...use English on a almost daily basis, but still don't understand why some people care about correct grammar
...think that anything over 20 degrees Celsius is too hot
...have eaten a whaleburger at least once
...have eaten a bisonburger at least once
...don't understand the idea of "inappropiate jokes". If something's funny, then it's obviously appropiate. And offending other people often IS funny
...consider the Catholic Church to be a dangerous sect
...don't accept the idea of chivalry towards women and all that "you wouldn't hit a lady" crap
...live in a wooden house
...just punch those bloody foreigners who think that all people here are ALWAYS drunk and that we have snow even in July in their fucking faces.
...consider animal liberationists to be terrorists
...consider any laws on alcohol and recreational drugs to be tyranny
...accept the fact that the Communist Party is an important element of the political spectrum, even if you don't vote for them
...believe that the freedom of speech includes the freedom of hate speech

[Lloydopolis]

You know you are Lloydopolesian if...


You believe Nerds and Geeks are superior lifeforms to ordinary humans.

You hate people who describe themselves as "cool", and any social system wherein "coolness" or popularity is a major factor.

You know pragmatism is far more desirable than idealism, simply because it gets the job done and idealism doesn't.

You believe meritocracy is just as important as democracy.

You are atheistic or agnostic, but still pay religion minimal respect as a pretence of being magnanimous.

You know that philosophy in and of itself holds no answers except the realisation that there are no answers, and that religion is just philosophy's bigger, meaner brother.

You know that life and the Universe hold no inherent meaning in and of themselves, but you don't care - its an issue of context, and ordinary human morality is good enough for our purposes. Just because there's no universal "right" or "wrong" doesn't mean we're not responsible for our actions.

You believe in the power of science and logical thought.

You believe in the power and authority of the World Assembly, and a bright future for all humanity.

You are suspicious of being being overly patriotic, outright dislike nationalism, and hate fascism and eugenecism with a passion.

You do not understand race or racism - all human beings are equal, without regard for the colour of their skin.

You hate sexism - all human beings are equal regardless of gender.

You know that just because non-Nerds and non-Geeks are inferior to you doesn't mean they are worthless, and still deserve to be treated with respect - with enough work and effort, they could become Nerds and Geeks as well.

You probably dislike athletics, and prefer to play videogames or Dungeons and Dragons instead.

You believe in people rising and falling based on their own merits, and believe in equal, objective education for all, and dislike social advantage and inheritance.

You are somewhat socially awkward and have rigid rules for interacting with others.

You are outwardly polite and courteous, but love to fill your speech with stealth insults.

You think space and space travel are wonderful, and want to learn more about the Universe.

[Sungai Pusat]

You know you are Pusatian if...
... You are an environmentalist
... If you take the public transport everyday or almost everyday.
... If you got an IQ amount of 90 and above.
... If you have a mainly vegetable diet.
... If you know about environmental technologies that already exist.
... If you made a creative idea every week or so.
... If you earn at a rough estimate of $1,000 to $5,000 as month.

[Jimanistan]

You know you are Jimani if...

... The idea of living away from your commune/neighborhood shocks and disturbs you.
... You've given up the use of Argentas in favor of a bartering system.
... You've seen more than three Brian Gustavore movies.
... You speak reverently of Liberto Verdon in the same was many reserve for Jesus Christ.
... You own three different radios, but no television.
... You can play five different stringed instruments, but you can play none of them well.
... You met your significant other at a poetry reading.
... Your community council spends more on coffee and wine than on food.
... You, as a boy, once spent an evening with a kitten on your left shoulder, as per Rifirni custom, and were afterward declared a man.
... You feel the acquisition of wealth is immoral.
... You're older than twelve, but still use a bicycle to go most places.
... Your commune has only one car, and it's a cheap Jimani copy... of a Pinto.
... You drink like a sieve and smoke like a stack, but have excellent medical coverage.
... The idea of private insurance puzzles you.
... You're not really sure what an eBook is.
... You know how to operate a fax machine.
... Your parents know how to operate telegraphs.
... You distrust all things foreign, while espousing international socialism. No one seems to notice.
... Between three of your friends are twelve STD's.
... Someone once stole a pen from you, which belonged to your commune, and you spent an hour tracking him down and bringing him to justice.

[Haremere]

You know you are from Haremere if...

You have to wear a jumper every bloody day
You hate the northerners (if you're a southerner)
You hate the southerners (if you're a northerner)
You hate everybody (if you're a westerner)
You can see an old castle/country house from your window
You fancy The Queen
You take pride in your countrymen's aptitude for making good puns
You are polite. But not too polite...
You are religious. But not too religious...
You like things in moderation. But not too much moderation.
You're an odd farmer with an incomprehensible accent

[The Star of the Queens]

You know you are from The Empire of the Star of the Queens...
... if you regularly cheer for your best ballroom dancing team, who are all robots and use more tech for dancing than a fleet of starships
... when you watch Star Trek, you laugh at how primitive can technology be.
... you wore uniforms all school
... you clearly remember your prom in high school - you were learning your dance for a year, and you danced waltz
... when you think about anything you recite the Book of Definitions
... you can recite the definition of an illness, a crime or money but never experienced either of them
... if you accidentally end up on an e-commerce site, you think you have seen the devil
... religion has been banned in your country
... you see aliens all around you and you think it's normal
... you see robots wherever you look
... your best friend is a sentient robot you have made during middle school in IT class
... your first bf/gf most probably was also a sentient robot
... when you see a picture, you want to walk around it - you usually see anything in 3D
... you most probably don't understand art
... you suddenly catch yourself speaking to a robot... in machine code
... you are very health-conscious in spite of knowing you can never ever fall ill
... you are an environmentalist
... cars have been outlawed. You use public transport and walk for miles.

[Swilatia]

...hate all dogs except hot dogs

We'd allmost add this to our list, except that we don't really care for hod dogs either... and we can't find our list.

[Moonkum]

You know you're from Moonkum if you ...

look up at the night sky and wonder where earth is.
know how to operate a helium3 harvester with closed eyes.
have a moon sheep as pet.
were at least two times dragged by a moon ant into their formicary and survived.
like cheese.
put a space suit on for a little stroll outside.
know how to operate an air-lock proper.
consider H.G. Wells The first men in the Moon from 1901 a journey account of stunning accuracy.
think of Usain Bolt as a very slow man.

[Manahakatouki]

You know you're in Manahakatouki if...

...a portable umbrella is contained in your back pocket constantly
...you get a friendly wave by almost everyone down the street
...you ride you're bike to work
...the sight of a ghost wandering your home is comforting
...you wear shorts almost all year round
...your condo contains several tropical plants
...you live in one of Manahakatouki's underground cities
...you enjoy dramatic performances better than movies
...a popular food of yours is fruit
...dogs and other animals can be seen walking around in the streets fed by owners all around

[Tierra Prime]

You know you are the Emperor if...
- You have destroyed whole planets.
- You have a massive fleet at your disposal.
- You can kill who you want.
- You live in a massive Palace similar to the Shinra building from Final Fantasy 7.

You know you are normal Tierran citizen if...
- You have seen a criminal shot on sight.
- You pay 100% Taxes.
- You have been forced to serve in the Military.
- You have seen a Star Destroyer.
- You speak both English and Russian.
- You live in an almost exact copy of Midgar from Final Fantasy 7.

[The One Minded]

You know you are part of the One Mind when....

...You are a dull zombie filling out the wishes of the One Mind

That's it...

[Freelasio]

You know you are Freelasian if...

...You can suddenly know about info you have had no experience of whatsoever
...You think so quickly and efficiently that it can only be a part of the genetics of the original 5 people who landed on our islands years ago (1 woman and 4 men, they are the ancestors of ALL freelasians)
...As a gurl you have bangs and small round/oval glasses or look elegant in a formal suit
...As a guy you are sort of dorky and tall or look very serious like those guys from goldman sacchs
...You are very curious as an 8 year old...so much that you even called 911 because you wanted to be like your dadda who was also on the fone....and ask 911 very stupid and random questions...(think of this as a confession from when i was around 4 years old )
...Your family creeps non-freelasians out a little bit
...You are pyrokinetic
...You are lumokinetic
...You seem to have an infinite brain capacity and an abnormally and largely addictive craving for knowledge
...You are enlightened or serious
...Your sense of humor just plain sucks
...*SPOILER* If you got the same image in your head when you see the guy named "Insert Name Here" from the issue
...If you have frequent dreams of a "destiny lover"
...You love calculators
...You love to eat bananas like there is no tommorow 0.o
...You are silly
...You like to poke other people because they are them
...You are strong whether you are dorky or not...mentally and physically...
...You are pacifist
...Isolated
...Not very Social

[TurtleShroom]

Hmm, some of this I've posted before on Jolt, but I guess I'm due for an update...too much to retcon! I'm using these as my basis.

^ Man, I wish I could do my post like that...

---

You know it's TurtleShroom when...


• A little church is on every few blocks.
  
• All your judges wear large crosses.
  ...-and you expect them to do it.
  
• "Chancellor" is the term for the highest head of state in the land.
  ...-and you're shocked when foreign Chancellors don't have the powers of kings.
  
• Five hundred members of a legislature isn't big.
  
• You've never seen a bottle of alcohol.
  ...-or a can of beer.
  ...Ever.
  
• You are astonished to see alcohol in foreign realms.
  ...-and you refuse to drink it.
  ...-if you can recognize it.
  
• You see things every day that, for a foreigner to see, would require a pound of a LSD.
  ...-then you condemn the foreigner for referencing it.
  
• Women either wear pants or skirts that at least go to the knees. Anything shorter immediantly brings implications of unholiness and debauchery.
  
• You have a nasty accent.
  
• Seeing a prostitute makes you vomit. No, we mean you actually throw up on cue.
  
• If a politician commits adultery, he should be fired and jailed for decades on end.
  
• You consider "The Twist" to be "edgy", "Hammer Time" to be "spastic", and any dance move invented past 1995 to be filthy.
  ...especially pelvic thrusts.
  ...if your local town even allows dancing.
  
• You expect all media to be rated by a censorship board.
  ...-and you like it that way.
  
• If the swear word isn't beeped, someone's going to get fired.
  
• You can't make direct contact with a homosexual.
  ...-and they scare you.
  ...-and if they come out, you'll run one out of your town.
  
• You theorize that Nazis have all signed a pact with the devil.
  ...despite being told that's incorrect.
  
• Christmas is a holy day in December. Nothing, except hospitals, the fire department, gas stations, and 9111 are open.
  
• "GAT" has a significant and powerful meaning.
  
• Everything is shut down on Good Friday, that Saturday, and Easter Sunday, except the essentials.
  
• You expect someone who burns a national flag in protest to be in jail for a month.
  ...you find it sickening that countries allow that.
  
• Serving turtle soup could be a death sentance for the cook.
  
• "Cream of mushroom" is an obscene phrase.
  
• You expect any murderer and many rapists to be killed.
  ...for the most prolific of cases, you'll call in and choose what form of capital punishment he recieves.
  
• You expect the death sentance to be swift, instantenous, and yet used whenever possible.
  ...you see no contradiction in that.
  
• You're a warmongerer.
  
• If you haven't attended church by the age of eight, people will think your parents are Atheistic.
  
• No one can explain the difference between Atheism and Agnosticism to you, no matter how hard you try.
  
• A government is supposed to be pure, incorruptible, friendly, useful, protective, and hold the best interests of the people at heart.
  ...-and you're saying this seriously, without sarcasm.
  ...-and your government actually does it.
  
• You see a state religion as perfectly okay, but shout if they dare enforce it.
  ...-because Jesus said He was to be chosen.
  
• You apply Christianity to everything.
  ...you once explained the Trinity to someone by comparing it to a hivemind.
  
• The mere mention of "Nicksylvania", "Victorious Decepticons", "Grand World Order", "Greater Nepal", or "Station Twelve" sends terror up your spine.
  
• You're gullible. Oh so gullible.
  ...a foreigner once told you it was a customary greeting in his homeland to "jump up and down and shout "AH-OOH-GA". You then did it.
  
• Your heads of state are not royals despite their power and crowns.
  
• You see dice as a perfectly appropriate means of choosing the successor to your heads of state.
  ...local media, when covering it, capitalize it as "The Dice".
  ...dice are practically sacred to you.
  
• You hate gambling.
  ...you wouldn't even bet in Go Fish.
  
• You are active in politics, and if you're not, you still vote anyway.
  
• If someone doesn't vote and still complains of the government, they're an idiot and are ignored or even pelted by pies.
  ...-and it's legal to pelt people with pie.
  ...-and run certain groups out of town.
  
• A satanist or Pastafarian can't practice in open, but Muslims, Christians, Jews, and any mainstream faith can, even in school.
  
• You hate excessive taxes but do not see "50%" as excessive.
  
• You don't really care that certain freedoms in the Constitution were amended decades after the thing was written.
  
• A scandal IS a reason to fire, and businesses who don't may get boycotted.
  
• Protests are annoying, stupid, and would be better off in the middle of nowhere.
  ...-even though they're fully allowed for most any reason.
  ...-but only in designated Protest Areas.
  ...-and you don't think that's an infringement in free speech.
  
• If you're Communist in TurtleShroom, you will look a lot like this by choice.
  
• You are used to being bombarded with commercials between television and radio shows.
  ...you actually listen to radio shows.
  
• The Internet is banned.
  ...-but computers aren't.
  ...-and you could really care less.
  
• You own a gun.
  ...okay, several.
  ...fine, you own many.
  ...-and one of them's a taser.
  
• The police and military all use double-barrelled shotguns as their main weapon.
  ...-and you see that as the highest in defense.
  
• If you support any one regime owning hundreds of thousands of nuclear weapons.
  
• You pronounce "nuclear" as "nookular".
  
• You support protecting the environment.
  ...unless, and only unless, it's oil.
  ...-but not uranium or anything else. Just oil.
  
• ...-and so much more.
  

[Swampforge]

You know you're a Swampfordian when:

- You've never heard of God, deities or religions
- You think people who live in the Kamowe desert are savages
- You turn the air conditioning on when the temperature hits anything over 20C
- You constantly ask yourself what the General Secretary would do in times of crisis.
- You voted for the General Secretary and you've never met anyone that didn't.
- You think capitalism is fictional
- You hate the fact that almost all your disposable income goes straight back to the government, but you are disgusted at the idea of paying for education or healthcare or transport.
- You know someone who lost all their money at the Native Swampforgeite casino
- You only have 2 meals a day
- You've known someone who has disappeared and have later recieved the notification they have been 'removed'
- The idea of anything being privately owned other than small shops and breweries seems ridiculous.

[Ewa beach]

You know you are Ewacian if...
...you go to a block part every weekend
...you are a Plynicist
...you want to slaughter the enemies of the Glorious Motherland
...you have no idea how other nations can be such sissy pants
...you don't like the internet
...you don't use the internet
...your car is from the 1950's
...you beat down criminals when you see them
...you do not know what mercy is
...you like to go to Jack's Diner
...you are thought of as a blood thirsty, brutal maniac by others
...yet you don't believe you are a blood thristy, brutal maniac
...you love to watch baseball
...you like country music
...you have an Ewacian accent (obivous)
...you have seen multiple criminals 'sliced and diced' on the side of the road
...you own a gun
...you go to the firing range at least three times a month
...you believe that everything the government does is right and for the people of the Federation.