The Daily Issues Thread [Read OP First]

by **San Rescate** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 8:11 am

President Ireland has ordered a crackdown on the illegal production of marijuana in San Rescate.

by **Veceria** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 11:05 am

Many soldiers onboard the ships sent against 'The Interstellar Empire of Diol' got bored after the fourth (or was it the fifth?) day without an attack order from the command center. Some of them even started hunting fish with their service rifles. They weren't very successful.

by **Maraque** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 11:12 am

The Principalities of Stahnasuk and Tizutri have merged, following the Domestic Partnership of HRM Princess Ashei and HRM Prince Sekrien.

The new principality shall be known as the Co-Principality of Stahnasuk-Tizutri.

by **The Supreme Truth** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 11:24 am

The Human Embodiment of Wisdom today declared himself royalty and a descendant of Muhammad and Christ.

by **San Rescate** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 11:38 am

The Supreme Truth wrote:The Human Embodiment of Wisdom today declared himself royalty and a descendant of Muhammad and Christ.

President Amy Ireland, upon hearing this ludicrous declaration, laughed so hard that she delayed a meeting with leading government officials by fifteen minutes.

by **Imeriata** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 11:51 am

The semle season started today as many federal subjects rushed to their stores to get their hands on the fat pastries above that are sold all over the federation to celebrate the coming of the spring and the new year.

by **Maraque** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 11:55 am

Wet season is less than a month away, and Tsvarchivans are beginning to buckle down in preparation for the inevitable torrential rains that are bound to fall. The month following Wet Season is the most lucrative for grocers, as families stock their shelves and refrigerators for the floods which will flow down the streets in the coming weeks, preventing many people from leaving their apartment buildings because of neck-high waters in some low-lying areas.

by **Zitru** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 12:01 pm

Many citizens are now touring The Hollywood Tower Hotel (Also known as Tower of Terror after the incident on 31st October 1939) They are being taught the mystery of why five people including child actress Sally Shine, disappeared that horrible night in the elevator. Now they're ghosts are still haunting the hotel.

by **Free Tristania** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 12:02 pm

Maraque wrote:Wet season is less than a month away, and Tsvarchivans are beginning to buckle down in preparation for the inevitable torrential rains that are bound to fall. The month following Wet Season is the most lucrative for grocers, as families stock their shelves and refrigerators for the floods which will flow down the streets in the coming weeks, preventing many people from leaving their apartment buildings because of neck-high waters in some low-lying areas.

Sounds familar to us. We are now in the dry season but we can expect mayhem to come within a few months. Good luck, fellow tropical country. :lol2:

At the moment we are having a little row with West Guiana which we believe is a nation involved in active slave trading. They have a fleet and an armed freighter at our southern most tip. Luckily our Armed Forces are ready and waiting.

by **San Rescate** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 12:02 pm

San Rescate's first interceptors flew today, as Lieutenants Maria Sepulveda and Marci Rolfes flew above the national capital city of Corcovado in brand new F-15 Eagles.

by **Angry Amazons** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 12:05 pm

In preparation of war Queen Dorean has brought her slave Governor into her residence for safe keeping as the enemies has threaten him with death.

by **Anarchaon** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 12:05 pm

The Anarchaon Church of Discord launched its annual recruitment drive today. The population of mental wards in neighboring nations is expected to drop by at least 10% in the chaos that follows. Applicants found not to be reasonably insane will be given lethal doses of anti-psychotics.

by **Alabama Americans** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 12:12 pm

U.S.A.A President will meet with THE LEADER OF L.I.A.H.O OR LET IT ALL HANG OUT,a civil rights leader,to discuss the ruling of
compusory nudists.

by **Fatatatutti** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 1:08 pm

The air assault regiments were practicing over the capital again today, raiding any flat spot big enough to land a helicopter. In one incident, a mall parking lot was occupied for more than an hour, much to the delight of the shoppers. Col. Cho, commanding the 7th Air Cavalry, rounded out the show by juggling hand grenades before being snatched up by an abseiling line.

Exercises are expected to continue throughout the week.

by **Chambri** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 1:30 pm

Nothing was ever posted right here.

by **San Rescate** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 2:49 pm

San Rescate has just commissioned the frigate Vincent A. Buchanan, now the largest and most powerful vessel in the Navy Service of the Republic.

by **Eridanus Dyson Sphere** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 3:13 pm

The recent census of the Terran Federation brings together an approximated population of 679,885,924,528,783,554 Terrans and 15,883,435,879,265,487 non-Terrans. Most non-Terrans are either Karusti or Jalistana.

by **Atlanza** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 3:22 pm

all citizens carry machetes into wild areas to protect themselves from possibe pheonixs, or wild animals.

by **Kubrath** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 3:37 pm

We have just increased the budget of our military.

by **Angry Amazons** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 7:14 pm

Our government has abolished the castration and mutilation of men, in hopes of gaining support from the rest of the international pro-slavery bloc.

by **Amazon Redheads** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 9:09 pm

Our government is firmly supporting the decision of the Angry Amazons to end castration.

by **Whairtia** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 10:45 pm

We taught the Greeks everything they new.

by **Stachland** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 10:58 pm

A special election in Viscare East, a constituency in our nation's capital city of Chevronia, has resulted in the election of Raims Chamsby, the first Green Party Member of the Popular Congress (MPC) to be elected from the capital. He defeated Norm David, the Labor Party candidate, Xavier MacAffee, the Conservative candidate, and Felix Clark, an independent.

SPECIAL ELECTION: Viscare East

Raims Chamsby — 47.8%
Norm David — 43.2%
Xavier MacAffee — 7.4%
Felix Clark — 1.5%

by **Chambri** » Sat Mar 05, 2011 11:32 pm

Chambri men rejoice at their Angry Amazonian sovereign's abolition of castration as a punishment for crime in both the Queendom of Angry Amazons and its Chambri Colony.

In response to reports of Chambri men foolishly squandering their money gambling instead of surrendering all of it to their Angry Amazonian overladies, Amendment 8 of the Chambri Colonial Charter was passed today:
8. Gambling among males is outlawed in Chambri Colony. Any Chambri found gambling is guilty of being negligent of his duty to the Angry Amazons.

The news report always ended right there. There was never any mention of anything else.

by **Eldar-State** » Sun Mar 06, 2011 8:16 am

Lord Daniel and Lady Ariel have abdicated the Dominion and have appointed the eldest daughter, Lady Idrial, to be the new ruler of Eldar-State. Eldar-State rulers are chosen among the ruling family, on the basis of merit rather than age or sex. Lady Idrial is 500 years old.

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