The Daily Issues Thread [Read OP First]

[New Acardia]

The President of the largest labor Union FCLO( The Federation of Certified Labor Organizations) Paul Marcheski has been indicted for corruption , Money laundering, fraud and murder.

[Fatatatutti]

The retail giant We B Toys has announced record profits for the 2010-2011 fiscal year, attributed largely to unprecedented sales of the Hungry Hungry Hippos Alphonse Edition. HHHAE is believed to be the best-selling game-toy in Fatatatutti's history, having recently surpassed Ka-POW! (which Alphonse doesn't like).

[Dai Coon Ree]

"... a Task Force lead by the IMV Bellerophon has found the Base of the pirate scum threatening the Ships on Route to the Vesta System. The Task Force consisting of 3 Frigates *IMV Delia, IMV Hades, IMV Glory* 3 Battlecruisers *IMV Terror, IMV Pain, IMV Agony* and the Battle Carrier IMV Bellerophon have vapurized the 3rd Planet in the nearby Onderon System where the Pirates have hided.

Offers have been made to surrender peacefully but have been answered with insults. The Admiral then has ordered the nuclear bombardement. After several hours of orbital bombing the Pirate Scum still aint surrendered, leaving our glorious Navy no other choice as to enable Nova Bombs who have destroyed the entire Planet.

Ships passing the Onderon System may be adviced that there is still planetary debris and follow the Bojes for save transfer."

[Bratoslovoukia]

Based on recent technological advances, thousands of trucks of new energy blasters are bringing futuristic technology to Bratoslovoukian troops everywhere. Also, various armed conflicts are taking place all over Bratoslovoukia between Imperial Guard and dissidents in response to the execution by firing squad of the entire inner communist party after their leader shot members of the Imperial Diet.

[Maraque]

HRM Léopold I the Great, King of Rhodes, is the only monarch in Tsvarchivan history that became King of Tsvarchi posthumously, after his wife HH Princess Noreneasany of Rhodes became Queen of Tsvarchi in 1900, just months after his death.

[Legitimate Excuses]

Fact: My nation has claimed your nation as being part of my nation.

[Oceanic Vakiadia]

Fact: My nation has claimed your nation as being part of my nation.

Hahahaha.

Try it.

[Saurisisia]

Fact: My nation has claimed your nation as being part of my nation.

Hahahaha.

Try it.

We agree with this statement entirely.

[Britanania]

The great American leader, Abraham Lincolm, was shot, leading to events that would eventually create Britanania.

[The Land of Columbia]

Fact: My nation has claimed your nation as being part of my nation.

Hahahaha.

Try it.

Indeed. Small as the FSC is, we could still whip you by ourselves.

And that's a fact.

Famous cartoon artist Yuri Kajiwara has been offered the protective services of the F. S. Marshals, but has decided to hold off for the moment, until somebody actually tries something.

[Maraque]

When Ms. Abani, Advisor of External Affairs, walked into HRH King Whirnak's office to tell him they were now "claimed" by some new, small community in the middle of no where, HRH King Whirnak was said to laugh so hard he wet his pants.

[Dai Coon Ree]

[quote="Legitimate Excuses";p="5353198"]Fact: My nation has claimed your nation as being part of my nation.[/quote

SPECIAL Broadcast:

"The imperial Navy has been set on alert Level one. It seems a minor System has become rampant and acts oddly! As we aint want any interupption in Travels, Commerce and simple Spacefareing the Borders of the Empire are now intensively guarded by the imperial Navy. Ships entering the Empire are due for imperial Inspections if the Sector Commanders see fit!

Civil Spacecrafs shall report entering Dai Coon Ree via the known procedures, any Vessel refuseing to do so will be considered hostile and be destroyed.

We appologize for this inconvinience and hope the usual free Travels will go on soon."

[Fatatatutti]

The theme from the spy-thriller Thunderpants has become the most downloaded song in Fatatatutti's Internet history, with more than a billion downloads.

"He always waddles when he walks.
He quacks when others only talk.
He thinks that life is worth the chance,
So he's off, like Thun... der... pants!"

[The BranRiech]

my nation hit a record for amount of people being executed in 1 day (12,985)

[Warhaven]

Fact: My nation has claimed your nation as being part of my nation.

It would be a shame to erase you from the pages of history, but if you try to enforce this claim and make it legitimate, The Bureaucracy WILL do exactly that. There will be nothing of your nation left. No land, no trees, no water, no lifeforms of any kind, not even any form of Virus or Bacteria. Your children will cease to exist, the memory of your existence will be wiped from the minds of others. In all respects, it will be as though you had never existed.

It is advisable that you revoke this absurd claim immediatly, before some nation takes this as an insult, and wipes the floor with your puny community.

[Dai Coon Ree]

"...We are onboard the IMV Colonia Agrippina *a large Battleship* As we wantet to show you the daily Routine of how the live is with the armed Forces we are now cought by surprise of the new Treat. **You see many Crewman manning Battlestations and performing high Alert Drills**. We have asked to see Rear Admiral Guderian and ask what this is all about. **The Camera swings over to a Bulkhead to see a large Fleet of supporting Crafts alligning into Battle Formation**

Rear Admiral: "Nothing really to worry, you see what is daily Routine on our Ship, training the Crew, performing excersize and being ready for the unexpected."

Reporter: "Does it has nothing to do with the Alert condition being send earlier?"

Rear Admiral:" No it hasnt. We just perform our Routine duties!"

**the Camera shows a large Spaceliner entering the Aegon System...the Border System this Fleet just patrols*

COM: "This is the IMV Colonia Agippina, please identify?"

Spaceliner:" This is the ICV Erebus returning from a Cruise to the Eridianii System with civil Passengers. We are due to enter the core System and our Home Port is Aelita."

...

Reporter:"As you can see nothing out of the usual and we shall not worry about any little treat?"

***Commercials***

[Germoria]

Fact: My nation has claimed your nation as being part of my nation.

It would be a shame to erase you from the pages of history, but if you try to enforce this claim and make it legitimate, The Bureaucracy WILL do exactly that. There will be nothing of your nation left. No land, no trees, no water, no lifeforms of any kind, not even any form of Virus or Bacteria. Your children will cease to exist, the memory of your existence will be wiped from the minds of others. In all respects, it will be as though you had never existed.

It is advisable that you revoke this absurd claim immediatly, before some nation takes this as an insult, and wipes the floor with your puny community.

At least from me the left overs would be floating around in the galaxy.

[Lancov]

The theme from the spy-thriller Thunderpants has become the most downloaded song in Fatatatutti's Internet history, with more than a billion downloads.

"He always waddles when he walks.
He quacks when others only talk.
He thinks that life is worth the chance,
So he's off, like Thun... der... pants!"

OOC: I think your posts are one of the things I enjoy most about F&NI.

[Legitimate Excuses]

Fact: My nation has claimed your nation as being part of my nation.

It would be a shame to erase you from the pages of history, but if you try to enforce this claim and make it legitimate, The Bureaucracy WILL do exactly that. There will be nothing of your nation left. No land, no trees, no water, no lifeforms of any kind, not even any form of Virus or Bacteria. Your children will cease to exist, the memory of your existence will be wiped from the minds of others. In all respects, it will be as though you had never existed.

It is advisable that you revoke this absurd claim immediatly, before some nation takes this as an insult, and wipes the floor with your puny community.

History means nothing! It's pages are full of lies. I stand by my ridiculous claim.

[Segmentia]

Yet another group on non-humans were executed today, this time by the Imperial Guard. The non-humans in question were caught near a major rail line on one of the colony worlds.

Although it looked as though they were just camping there, they could not prove themselves to be Imperial citizens, and were executed as enemies of the state. After the executions however, it was discoved that the non-humans were actuall Imperial citizens.

No disciplinary action has been taken against the Guardsmen who carried out the executions.

The Emperor Protects.

[Saurisisia]

Yet another group on non-humans were executed today, this time by the Imperial Guard. The non-humans in question were caught near a major rail line on one of the colony worlds.

Although it looked as though they were just camping there, they could not prove themselves to be Imperial citizens, and were executed as enemies of the state. After the executions however, it was discoved that the non-humans were actuall Imperial citizens.

No disciplinary action has been taken against the Guardsmen who carried out the executions.

The Emperor Protects.

Yet another example of why we keep our doors open to all Reptilian Non-Humans in the Imperium who wish to flee here.

[Segmentia]

Yet another example of why we keep our doors open to all Reptilian Non-Humans in the Imperium who wish to flee here.

One of the High Lords was quoted saying the following.

"We certainly wish they would leave. It would make things much easier. But of course asking a non-human to see reason and unse common sense it like trying to destroy a Baneblade with a Lasgun."

The same High Lord is the one who brough the 'Non-human relocation and rights protection.' bill to the rest of the High Lords. The bill is still being debated.

[Germoria]

Yet another group on non-humans were executed today, this time by the Imperial Guard. The non-humans in question were caught near a major rail line on one of the colony worlds.

Although it looked as though they were just camping there, they could not prove themselves to be Imperial citizens, and were executed as enemies of the state. After the executions however, it was discoved that the non-humans were actuall Imperial citizens.

No disciplinary action has been taken against the Guardsmen who carried out the executions.

The Emperor Protects.

Yet another example of why we keep our doors open to all Reptilian Non-Humans in the Imperium who wish to flee here.

The Empire couldn't agree more, time to get that dimension Jump ready to make a underground rail road of sorts, in other news.

The First Wookie Storm Trooper was announced today, he is named Korvango and he is 34 years old, he is already being accepted as a equal, he was at the academy for a good amount of time and he already has shown to be a good learn and has passed three years before most other Sapients. Here is a pic of him at the academy, he was drunk, yes he has a criminal history, and yes it is illegal to drink at the academy.

[Ruskarkand]

Today, multiple sweeps were made all across the nations by Dragoons to root out any trace of Human in the area, to exterminate them.
However, much to our amusement, we found they were fighting AMONGST THEMSELVES.

The Supreme Commander has simply ordered to sit back our offensive temporarily.
However, SAT.CAM resource has taken footage of one of the more recent battles, between the two factions.
You can see it here

[Saurisisia]

Recently, several unidentified ships appeared in orbit over a planet that was uninhabited but well within Saurisian territorial space and also had a small garrison on it. The ships were asked to identify themselves and state their purpose. They identified themselves as members of a previously unknown Reptilian species called the Trandoshans who were from another Galaxy. They arrived in our Galaxy through a strange series of events and now seek to establish a new home on a planet that suited them.

They were allowed on the planet and, after a scouting party landed, they determined that it was the perfect spot for them, so more of them landed on the planet, and they began to establish their new home. The Saurisian soldiers couldn't help but scoff at the relatively primitive weapons the Trandoshans were using. One Tyrannosaurus made a comment about the newcomers' appearance: "Man, these guys are ass-ugly."