Ridiculous things your military does

[Eboinland]

We kill people.. with guns.

[Gutia]

Indeed, and to answer your question Anglo Saxon. Elephants and Hippos are not native species to Gutia.

Horses probably aren't either, but you import and breed them.

Horses are native to Gutia and regarding the antlers. The first idea was to saw them off, but that was unecessary as the antlers 'shed' their antlers at certain times of the year. Besides the antlers are very good offensive weapons. At least they look scary.

[The Kangaroo Republic]

Horses probably aren't either, but you import and breed them.

Horses are native to Gutia and regarding the antlers. The first idea was to saw them off, but that was unecessary as the antlers 'shed' their antlers at certain times of the year. Besides the antlers are very good offensive weapons. At least they look scary.

More importantly, mooses are awesome.

[New East Ireland]

We use scare tactics on our enemies..

[Puerto Hispania]

Well our military does a few things that are fairly weird. However one that I will mention is that there are bars in military outposts and bases. For those soldiers who wish to drink, there is a large assortment of typical alcohols from Puerto Hispania as well as a large assortment of general alcohols. While, we allow our soldiers to drink while off-duty we do not allow them to get drunk. Any bartender allowing a soldier to become seriously intoxicated is severely punished as is the soldier who became intoxicated.

[The Anglo-Saxon Empire]

Well our military does a few things that are fairly weird. However one that I will mention is that there are bars in military outposts and bases. For those soldiers who wish to drink, there is a large assortment of typical alcohols from Puerto Hispania as well as a large assortment of general alcohols. While, we allow our soldiers to drink while off-duty we do not allow them to get drunk. Any bartender allowing a soldier to become seriously intoxicated is severely punished as is the soldier who became intoxicated.

Lucky, our soldiers aren't allowed to drink anything besides their beer rations, which are only about 0.5% alcohol and taste like warm urine.

[Puerto Hispania]

Well our military does a few things that are fairly weird. However one that I will mention is that there are bars in military outposts and bases. For those soldiers who wish to drink, there is a large assortment of typical alcohols from Puerto Hispania as well as a large assortment of general alcohols. While, we allow our soldiers to drink while off-duty we do not allow them to get drunk. Any bartender allowing a soldier to become seriously intoxicated is severely punished as is the soldier who became intoxicated.

Lucky, our soldiers aren't allowed to drink anything besides their beer rations, which are only about 0.5% alcohol and taste like warm urine.

Honestly I'm surprised anyone drinks that. We do not put the alcohol in rations as when soldiers are on-duty they are expected to be completely sober, awake and alert. Any soldier who is found to not be sober when on-duty is harshly disciplined. However off-duty soldiers are allowed to drink and enjoy themselves but they are not allowed to become intoxicated to the point where they become a disturbance or where it will affect them while on-duty. Bartenders are to stop them before this becomes a problem. We find it raises morale and camaraderie and it allows us to monitor alcohol consumption. Bars are well-stocked, soldiers have to pay for their drinks but at incredibly reduced rates (we issue them cards where we place their pay, they can transfer the money into their bank accounts or use them in the area, this is easier than transporting checks or money, we find it greatly simplifies everything).

[The Anglo-Saxon Empire]

Lucky, our soldiers aren't allowed to drink anything besides their beer rations, which are only about 0.5% alcohol and taste like warm urine.

Honestly I'm surprised anyone drinks that. We do not put the alcohol in rations as when soldiers are on-duty they are expected to be completely sober, awake and alert. Any soldier who is found to not be sober when on-duty is harshly disciplined. However off-duty soldiers are allowed to drink and enjoy themselves but they are not allowed to become intoxicated to the point where they become a disturbance or where it will affect them while on-duty. Bartenders are to stop them before this becomes a problem. We find it raises morale and camaraderie and it allows us to monitor alcohol consumption. Bars are well-stocked, soldiers have to pay for their drinks but at incredibly reduced rates (we issue them cards where we place their pay, they can transfer the money into their bank accounts or use them in the area, this is easier than transporting checks or money, we find it greatly simplifies everything).

Who says they do? The point of it is to partially wean them off alcohol completely. They go into the military thinking, 'at least I can get a little buzzed' but soon realize that the alcohol is so little in amount, tastes so bad, is not cooled in any way, and is so diluted, that even if it didn't taste awful, there is no point to drinking it because you can't even get buzzed, let alone drunk. After four years in the military, soldiers probably haven't actually had any alcohol in four years. Also, Luthorian (the demonym of my country (Luthoria) in SMS) soldiers are generally so restricted and held to such a high disciplinary standard, especially compared to other militaries in the nation that they are often called warrior monks, because they don't drink, can't smoke, can't really have any sex unless they are on leave (can't have sex when abroad at all except with other soldiers) or are willing to have sex with a female Luthorian soldier (who averages around 5'8", is about as well built as any male soldier, and has a shaved head), and can't keep any personal belongings with them.

Each of those have their own reasons for being banned, alcohol and cigarettes are bad for you, personal belongings are seen as distractions, and sex has a multitude of potential problems, pregnancy for female soldiers, STDs, prostitutes could assist the enemy in a number of ways, and generally men are vulnerable to talking too much when in front of women. Also, just to add it in, my military is gender blind. All soldiers are given the exact same rations, which includes condoms and tampons, meaning that as well as getting something to help them deal with their time of the month, women are also given a protective sheath for an appendage they don't have, and as well as getting protection, men are given tampons.

[Mediterreania]

Honestly I'm surprised anyone drinks that. We do not put the alcohol in rations as when soldiers are on-duty they are expected to be completely sober, awake and alert. Any soldier who is found to not be sober when on-duty is harshly disciplined. However off-duty soldiers are allowed to drink and enjoy themselves but they are not allowed to become intoxicated to the point where they become a disturbance or where it will affect them while on-duty. Bartenders are to stop them before this becomes a problem. We find it raises morale and camaraderie and it allows us to monitor alcohol consumption. Bars are well-stocked, soldiers have to pay for their drinks but at incredibly reduced rates (we issue them cards where we place their pay, they can transfer the money into their bank accounts or use them in the area, this is easier than transporting checks or money, we find it greatly simplifies everything).

Who says they do? The point of it is to partially wean them off alcohol completely. They go into the military thinking, 'at least I can get a little buzzed' but soon realize that the alcohol is so little in amount, tastes so bad, is not cooled in any way, and is so diluted, that even if it didn't taste awful, there is no point to drinking it because you can't even get buzzed, let alone drunk. After four years in the military, soldiers probably haven't actually had any alcohol in four years. Also, Luthorian (the demonym of my country (Luthoria) in SMS) soldiers are generally so restricted and held to such a high disciplinary standard, especially compared to other militaries in the nation that they are often called warrior monks, because they don't drink, can't smoke, can't really have any sex unless they are on leave (can't have sex when abroad at all except with other soldiers) or are willing to have sex with a female Luthorian soldier (who averages around 5'8", is about as well built as any male soldier, and has a shaved head), and can't keep any personal belongings with them.

Each of those have their own reasons for being banned, alcohol and cigarettes are bad for you, personal belongings are seen as distractions, and sex has a multitude of potential problems, pregnancy for female soldiers, STDs, prostitutes could assist the enemy in a number of ways, and generally men are vulnerable to talking too much when in front of women. Also, just to add it in, my military is gender blind. All soldiers are given the exact same rations, which includes condoms and tampons, meaning that as well as getting something to help them deal with their time of the month, women are also given a protective sheath for an appendage they don't have, and as well as getting protection, men are given tampons.

The Mediterreanian Militia Corps is much more lax. Soldiers are give leave frequently, and some of them even carry cannabis. However, being "inhibited by vice-related conditions" (intoxicated while on duty, or incapacitated by STDs) will most likely result in a court martial.

Soldiers are very much encouraged to carry both personal possessions and cash with them. Personal effects are seen as a boost to morale, while cash allows soldiers to trade with the locals. However, stealing is against Militia Corps policy, and will result in loss of privileges and pay. Desecration of remains, or rape, will lead to court-martial, psychological evaluation, and possible public punishment.

[Malgrave]

The Malgravean Military take even the slightest opportunity to drink a nice cup of tea. Rumours have circulated that during a recent exercise a pilot of the Malgravean air-force was seen attempting to drink from a flask while undergoing some training.

The only ridiculous part here is that your airforce isn't outfitting your fighters with a sepcialised thermos style containers that use a pressurisation system to allow them to provide the pilot with hot tea across the entire rnage of G-loadings he might experience.

Unless of coruse it wasn't a fighter but the question then is: why use a thermos? Why not get the trolley dolly* to brew some up for you.



* in most cases in the Crookfur Armed Forces the Trolley Dolly will actually be a grumpy laodmaster who will kick you off his plane if you fail to ask for tea in the correct fashion.

He was flying a prototype bomber. It had not been installed with proper tea drinking facilities in mind. Prototypes now come with this feature following this incident however.

[Crookfur]

Honestly I'm surprised anyone drinks that. We do not put the alcohol in rations as when soldiers are on-duty they are expected to be completely sober, awake and alert. Any soldier who is found to not be sober when on-duty is harshly disciplined. However off-duty soldiers are allowed to drink and enjoy themselves but they are not allowed to become intoxicated to the point where they become a disturbance or where it will affect them while on-duty. Bartenders are to stop them before this becomes a problem. We find it raises morale and camaraderie and it allows us to monitor alcohol consumption. Bars are well-stocked, soldiers have to pay for their drinks but at incredibly reduced rates (we issue them cards where we place their pay, they can transfer the money into their bank accounts or use them in the area, this is easier than transporting checks or money, we find it greatly simplifies everything).

Who says they do? The point of it is to partially wean them off alcohol completely. They go into the military thinking, 'at least I can get a little buzzed' but soon realize that the alcohol is so little in amount, tastes so bad, is not cooled in any way, and is so diluted, that even if it didn't taste awful, there is no point to drinking it because you can't even get buzzed, let alone drunk. After four years in the military, soldiers probably haven't actually had any alcohol in four years. Also, Luthorian (the demonym of my country (Luthoria) in SMS) soldiers are generally so restricted and held to such a high disciplinary standard, especially compared to other militaries in the nation that they are often called warrior monks, because they don't drink, can't smoke, can't really have any sex unless they are on leave (can't have sex when abroad at all except with other soldiers) or are willing to have sex with a female Luthorian soldier (who averages around 5'8", is about as well built as any male soldier, and has a shaved head), and can't keep any personal belongings with them.

Each of those have their own reasons for being banned, alcohol and cigarettes are bad for you, personal belongings are seen as distractions, and sex has a multitude of potential problems, pregnancy for female soldiers, STDs, prostitutes could assist the enemy in a number of ways, and generally men are vulnerable to talking too much when in front of women. Also, just to add it in, my military is gender blind. All soldiers are given the exact same rations, which includes condoms and tampons, meaning that as well as getting something to help them deal with their time of the month, women are also given a protective sheath for an appendage they don't have, and as well as getting protection, men are given tampons.

You do realise that both condoms and tampons are very handy items and have loads of potential uses in the feild, don't you?

[Bafuria]

Honestly I'm surprised anyone drinks that. We do not put the alcohol in rations as when soldiers are on-duty they are expected to be completely sober, awake and alert. Any soldier who is found to not be sober when on-duty is harshly disciplined. However off-duty soldiers are allowed to drink and enjoy themselves but they are not allowed to become intoxicated to the point where they become a disturbance or where it will affect them while on-duty. Bartenders are to stop them before this becomes a problem. We find it raises morale and camaraderie and it allows us to monitor alcohol consumption. Bars are well-stocked, soldiers have to pay for their drinks but at incredibly reduced rates (we issue them cards where we place their pay, they can transfer the money into their bank accounts or use them in the area, this is easier than transporting checks or money, we find it greatly simplifies everything).

Who says they do? The point of it is to partially wean them off alcohol completely. They go into the military thinking, 'at least I can get a little buzzed' but soon realize that the alcohol is so little in amount, tastes so bad, is not cooled in any way, and is so diluted, that even if it didn't taste awful, there is no point to drinking it because you can't even get buzzed, let alone drunk. After four years in the military, soldiers probably haven't actually had any alcohol in four years. Also, Luthorian (the demonym of my country (Luthoria) in SMS) soldiers are generally so restricted and held to such a high disciplinary standard, especially compared to other militaries in the nation that they are often called warrior monks, because they don't drink, can't smoke, can't really have any sex unless they are on leave (can't have sex when abroad at all except with other soldiers) or are willing to have sex with a female Luthorian soldier (who averages around 5'8", is about as well built as any male soldier, and has a shaved head), and can't keep any personal belongings with them.

Each of those have their own reasons for being banned, alcohol and cigarettes are bad for you, personal belongings are seen as distractions, and sex has a multitude of potential problems, pregnancy for female soldiers, STDs, prostitutes could assist the enemy in a number of ways, and generally men are vulnerable to talking too much when in front of women. Also, just to add it in, my military is gender blind. All soldiers are given the exact same rations, which includes condoms and tampons, meaning that as well as getting something to help them deal with their time of the month, women are also given a protective sheath for an appendage they don't have, and as well as getting protection, men are given tampons.

While Bafurians have a reputation of being heavy drinkers or alcoholics, their alcohol consumption annually is not exceptionally high, about 11 litres per year.
But Bafurians are binge drinkers, buzz is just a temporary phenomenon. In the military, they are either completely sober or shooting the 10 beer cans they just finished from the 70 mm mortar for shits and giggles.

[Asumbuoy]

All of our troops are given a headset which are interlinked so that HQ can address everyman no matter where he is. However, when in battle, music is played over the radio waves ... it does wonders for morale. Some examples of the music played are below:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vy_c_BUm7Bo
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iUCJ65tc ... re=related

[The Anglo-Saxon Empire]

Who says they do? The point of it is to partially wean them off alcohol completely. They go into the military thinking, 'at least I can get a little buzzed' but soon realize that the alcohol is so little in amount, tastes so bad, is not cooled in any way, and is so diluted, that even if it didn't taste awful, there is no point to drinking it because you can't even get buzzed, let alone drunk. After four years in the military, soldiers probably haven't actually had any alcohol in four years. Also, Luthorian (the demonym of my country (Luthoria) in SMS) soldiers are generally so restricted and held to such a high disciplinary standard, especially compared to other militaries in the nation that they are often called warrior monks, because they don't drink, can't smoke, can't really have any sex unless they are on leave (can't have sex when abroad at all except with other soldiers) or are willing to have sex with a female Luthorian soldier (who averages around 5'8", is about as well built as any male soldier, and has a shaved head), and can't keep any personal belongings with them.

Each of those have their own reasons for being banned, alcohol and cigarettes are bad for you, personal belongings are seen as distractions, and sex has a multitude of potential problems, pregnancy for female soldiers, STDs, prostitutes could assist the enemy in a number of ways, and generally men are vulnerable to talking too much when in front of women. Also, just to add it in, my military is gender blind. All soldiers are given the exact same rations, which includes condoms and tampons, meaning that as well as getting something to help them deal with their time of the month, women are also given a protective sheath for an appendage they don't have, and as well as getting protection, men are given tampons.

You do realise that both condoms and tampons are very handy items and have loads of potential uses in the feild, don't you?

Never said they don't find uses for them, just said that they are issued for their designated purpose to both sexes because my military doesn't differentiate at all. Think of it as lawful stupidity with positive unintended side effects. My government is supposed to treat both sexes the same, men need condoms, and women need tampons, my government being retarded about equality gives men tampons as well, and women condoms, because it wouldn't be fair to only give women tampons or something.

[Freethinking humanists]

Women are allowed to fight on the front lines. However, their training requirements are the same as men, they don't get special treatment. Unfortunately, sometimes this means they actually have to work harder to achieve the same physical standards.

[The Anglo-Saxon Empire]

Women are allowed to fight on the front lines. However, their training requirements are the same as men, they don't get special treatment. Unfortunately, sometimes this means they actually have to work harder to achieve the same physical standards.

So?

[Xanicea]

Well in terms of strange I'd have to say:

1. A strange Duma Amendment made a bottle of vodka a daily ration for all troops. The amendment was passed on the grounds that it would boost the brewery economy and raise troop morale... The vodka is not to be consumed whilst on duty, however, it may be consumed at any time and/or place while off-duty.

2. Higher-ranked soldiers are to salute lower-ranking soldiers first, as a sign of respect for their sacrifice. The reason behind this is that lower-ranking soldiers always perform the "FNG" regimens: cleaning toilets, digging trenches, entering enemy emplacements first, etc. and as such are constantly miserable. Higher-rank soldiers are content with this in that they too have performed such duties and sympathize with their lower-rank counterparts.

[Coltarin]

we use certain POWs as bombs
we preform surgery place a high explosive in body cavity
release to their lines
blow them up
works really well to bad we rarely get POWs because we are such good shots

[Cameroi]

our military does precisely one, ridiculous, or perhaps not so ridiculous, thing. and that is to not exist. unless and until needed. and then within matter of moments, materialize itself into existence. how it manages to do this might also be ridiculous to attempt to describe. never the less it does, or can, or has. the one time it ever needed to do so.

[Asumbuoy]

our military does precisely one, ridiculous, or perhaps not so ridiculous, thing. and that is to not exist. unless and until needed. and then within matter of moments, materialize itself into existence. how it manages to do this might also be ridiculous to attempt to describe. never the less it does, or can, or has. the one time it ever needed to do so.

[Kyraina]

we thorw our recruits into a fire fight with no training

[Geenberg]

We Let our soldiers stay home and play Playstation all day XD

[Ruskarkand]

Well, one ridiculous thing Ruskarkand does is respect it's enemy abit too much.

If they come across a wounded enemy in the field, they will stabilize their wounds with their own first aid kit, before hauling their wounded ass back to the Dragoon Firebase.
The soldier will then be patched up good, and then sent to walk off back to their army.

A dragoon never kills someone that is weak, for it makes them weak.
A second try to halt the Dragoon army is given to the soldier.

[Banditoca]

Paranoid assassinations and the accumulation of dirty bombs.

[Ichinayagara]

we sent our 11th Draconian Division to pick Dasiys to put in their helmets before assaulting the XXI bastion of our hated Capitalist enemies before the glorious revolution