[COMMERCIAL BREAK CONCLUDES]
ANNOUNCER:
WELCOME BACK TO THE 423 PRESIDENTIAL ELECTIONS!... ATOP THE TALLEST BUILDING IN TORCH CITY AND EUPHEMIE, THE WEST TOWER OF THE ATLANTIC ECONOMIC CENTER!
EBN ANCHORMAN: Only five candidates remain in what has been, thus far, one of the closest, most publicized electoral face-offs since '91. We're here LIVE atop the 2 AEC, and it would appear the moderator has a trick up his sleeve this time…
ANS ANCHORMAN: After a rocky campaign including physical assault, the deployment of combat-troops, allegations of foreign interference, and of racist sentiment, the National Republican party gathers tonight for the penultimate debate before the national primaries. As we’ve been for the duration of the campaign, Atlantic News Service is proud to present the world’s finest piece of entertainment in the world’s most vibrant democracy… coming straight to you from Torch City!
ANC ANCHORWOMAN: Another round of bare-knuckle brawls, mudslinging, sweet victories and bitter defeats awaits us today atop the AEC in Torch City. Who will come out as the top National Republican candidate, who will kiss their presidential campaigns goodbye, and who will take on their Federalist counterpart in the Presidential Elections later this year? All this and more will be answered tonight, and the ANC is here to give you live coverage of this groundbreaking event!
MODERATOR: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the final debate of the 423 National Republican primaries. Today, will be a little different...
[AUDIENCE SWOONS]
[CAMERA PANS TO A TABLE, FIVE APPARENT BACKPACKS LIE ATOP THE TABLE]
MODERATOR: In anticipation of violence to come, there are five parachutes here for all candidates to wear — but be careful, one of 'em's rigged to fail! Come, gentlemen — pick your chutes!
[AUDIENCE GASPS]
[CANDIDATES ALL SELECT THEIR PARACHUTES]
EBN ANCHORMAN: That's right — the lives of one of these five politicians is on the line here today. It
was in the contract, after all! [chuckle]
MODERATOR: As you might all be aware of by now, General Temple and Senator Kiswell have dropped out of the elections... leaving five candidates to decide the future of the National Republican Party. Without further ado, let the final debate begin...
[MUSIC][PREPARATIONS CONCLUDE]
MODERATOR: As is well-known by now, the
segregationist National Republican government in Turmenista is in the midst of dealing with one of the worst race riots in.. well, decades, to the degree that the federal government is debating intervention. Starting with Senator Snakeeye, what exactly is your stance on Turmenista?
SNAKEEYE: I disavow all members of Turmenista's National Republican party. We must remember, however, that it was the Camden administration that permitted such a thing to persist. Restoring an egalitarian Turmenista is among the first priorities of my Administration — to think that half a decade ago it was seen as a bastion of multiracial egalitarianism, reduced to this — is absolutely horrific. And yet while black children are beaten to death by police, the Torch City elite reveled in their opulence, hedonism and wealth.
[SNAKEEYE HOLDS UP A PHOTO OF A BLACK CHILD]
SNAKEEYE: Lucas Everything-She-Wants D. Smith — beaten to death by police while our President was getting a blowjob in the comfort of Collis Palatium. This BOY was only FIFTEEN when his life was cut short by Neo-Arcadia police. We CANNOT allow this to go on!
[AUDIENCE GOES WILD]
AUDIENCE MEMBER: DAMA FONTO! FUCK DA NATREPS! JUSTICE FOR LUCAS!
MODERATOR: Thank you. Senator Schroeder, your stance on Turmenista's rampant racism?
SCHROEDER: It is entirely, and wholly condemnable. I think on this matter, me and Senator Snakeeye have the same perspective.
[CROSS THUMPS HIS PODIUM]
CROSS: Senators Schroeder and Snakeeye. I can’t help but see in your denunciations a complete and utter lack of distinction between the errant
leadership of the Turmenistan National Republicans, and the rank-and-file membership of that party. The segregation ongoing in Turmenista is not the desire of the majority - it is a system of discrimination implemented by a wealthy and powerful elite to pacify a populace. Turmenista is a state held hostage by a reactionary and extreme minority. Federal intervention is required to bring this state into the line with the rest of our nation, but more importantly, Federal intervention is a moral necessity. As President of the Federal States of Euphemie, I
will end the reign of Raven Blake
[1] in Turmenista.
SNAKEEYE: All due respect, Governor, but there is a sickness in not just this great party, but this nation — the spectre of the dated, divisive ideals of racism. If we are to prosper in this renewed, Euphemian Century, we must put a stop to racism where it stands — and disavow any complacency therein!
CROSS: I don’t desire nor demand your respect, Senator. Racism in our country is not a natural condition, as Euphemie is a nation blessed by diversity in serene union. Racism in our country is by the imposition of the moneyed interests which benefit from it. Racism in our country is the brainchild of men you once hob-nobbed with in the Chamber of Commerce, Senator. Racism in our country is why the black men in the prime of their lives spent many of their best earning years digging dirt in Pence for minimum wage.
[AUDIENCE GASPS, APPLAUSE]
SNAKEEYE: Governor, are you using my record in completing the Pence Canal and bridging the gap between our great nation and our northern neighbor against me? At no point have I endorsed any
segregationists — not in my goddamn state, and not anywhere in this nation! Engadine is a bastion of religious and individual freedom, which is why two-hundred years ago the Stigmatic Ourielist Church relocated to Pence, fleeing the religious persecution and totalitarian control evident across the former Sacred Union State!
MODERATOR: Thank you, Senator.
[STRICKLAND RAISES HIS HAND]
MODERATOR: Go ahead, Governor.
STRICKLAND: I don’t know about any Augustans here, but over the course of my life Engadine has been one thing if nothing else, and it has been an OASIS of religious, cultural and racial harmony! The same can only be said for the state Governor Cross represents in the last thirty years...
CROSS: Senator, the state of Augusta has been a model for integration of disparate cultures since prior to the turn of the century. We come from a bi-partisan tradition, and have successfully bound together Augustans of white and black heritage. An Alexandrian accountant and a farmer outside of Greenville can feel united in a shared pride in their state, without feelings of jealousy or spite. That’s not solely a testament to the quality of our people, but a testament to
real policy that promotes integration. Equality of opportunity for all and government investment to ensure that any Augustan can climb the social ladder has been essential to that harmony. As President of the Federal States, I will
proudly apply the successful policy prescriptions used in my home-state to our More Perfect Union. I dream of a day in which a citrus farmer in Red Pine, a cattle rancher in Nephi, and a barista in Blume can come together under our flag. Unlike the rest of the candidates on this stage, I have a proven track record of achieving that.
MODERATOR: Senator Clarendon, your input?
CLARENDON: During my tenure as CEO of Transcontinental Airlines, I joined the multitude of Euphemian companies who embargoed Turmenista. The state's governing elite do not reflect my political views, nor do they reflect the views of the National Republican Party at large. I believe it to also be the aftermath of a weak federal government — to which Camden himself bears a fair degree of responsibility in the current situation. Put simply, we must
free our fellow Euphemians who are under the oppression of Turmenista's state government. For too long we've simply told ourselves, 'it can't happen here'... ladies and gentlemen, it's already happened! What we ought to think about now is how to
stop it. To this end, the first executive order should be the dismissal of Turmenista's state government by clear, resolute force.
MODERATOR: Thank you, Senator. Onto the next matter — for the past few months, Velezia has become a matter of attention to the Federal States, to which President Camden ordered the deployment of the 1st Armored Division and the 87th Cavalry Division to the northern reaches of the country to maintain the peace. Some see it as a cornerstone of Akhmanari infiltration into Ophiric politics, and some — more recently Oireachtas Chieftain Ruarc Carmody of the Federation of Kael, have publicly interpreted our steady hand in Ophir as weakness. Governor Cross, you may begin.
CROSS: Thank you, Moderator. I am acutely aware of the ongoing humanitarian crisis and military conflict in the region - indeed, I myself have deployed forces of the patriotic Augustan National Guard into the neighboring state of Canguari in an effort to quell the violence. Velezia and Canguari, and indeed, the nations in the wider region, require the steadfast commitment of the Federal States of Euphemie to protect the rights of their citizenry and their continuing sovereignty. That is not, I believe, disputed by anyone on this stage. What is a matter of debate is
how we extend that aid. It is my belief that the death of Euphemian servicemen is an inherent consequence of any action involving boots-on-the-ground, exemplified by the recent engagement of Forward Base Kari. We must weigh any commitment of ground troops to the region with the risk inherent to such a deployment, and ensure we have clear-cut objectives and means to accomplish them. We do not currently have that. As we speak tonight, Augustan servicemen are fighting and dying in Canguari to accomplish a vaguely defined objective. And a vaguely defined objective is an unattainable one. President Camden has abdicated his responsibility to our Armed Forces to provide them a mission directive. As President, I will not send a single soldier of our Armed Forces into a combat zone without that man or woman understanding exactly what they are being sent to achieve. As it pertains to our current combat deployments, my objectives are simple. Canguarian nationalists must be stamped out, and a permanent democratic solution to self-governance of the Canguarian people achieved. The Cortina Roja must be limited and eliminated to proclude their violence spilling over international borders, and the Government of Velezia must be brought into line with Ophiric norms. We must partner with our continental partner the Federal Republic of North Ophir and our regional partner Alvimia to attain these objectives. Thank you, moderator.
[AUDIENCE APPLAUSE+VISIBLE FIREWORKS NEAR THE AEC]
MODERATOR: Thank you, Senator. Senator Schroeder, your anti-war stance is more than publicly known — would you like to elaborate?
SCHROEDER: I would be happy to. My views are known to everyone watching today, except perhaps a few Federalists who were curious enough to tune in to the final debate before primaries. My opinion is that the Federalist government under Camden has decided to commit to an economically and psychologically taxing conflict which it has seen fit to end despite not even being a participant for most of its duration. My view is that which party wins in Canguari is irrelevant. The primary concern is ensuring that whichever faction prevails does not see fit to develop weaponry - or otherwise hijack Euphemian weaponry - which is capable of seriously affecting the conflicts outcome. As President, I will remove this country from a war which has seen dozens of Euphemians killed in a strange and foreign nation, and oversee the diplomatic effort to ensure that what happened in November last year will not occur again.
CROSS: Senator, you’re a legislator. Not a member of executive government. I’m afraid this has tinted your view of the world into one the rest of us view as quite laughable. Outside of the halls of the Senate, persuasion is not achieved through lobbying and eloquent speeches. It is achieved through the display, and ultimately the use, of force. It is the universal language to which all people respond. The forces responsible for the disaster in November knew we would disapprove, so I cannot fathom why you believe having diplomats tell them so would affect anything. The F.S.E does not possess the biggest, greatest military in human history so we can be reduced to politely requesting nations follow our requests. We issue instructions, and deliver consequences if they are not followed. You don’t remedy crime by asking criminals nicely to please stop, you do it by locking them up. Not that you’d know the first thing about tackling
real issues.
[STRICKLAND RAISES HIS HAND]
STRICKLAND: You know, Governor Cross, for someone who’s deployed their National Guard to fight the Nationalists you seem to be fairly confident in their victory over the Duke of Canguari.
CROSS: I do not believe the nationalists will attain a military victory over the Duke. I do, however, believe that the Duke’s government has been shown to be untenable. I support the Duke’s reign for the duration of the current emergency, but once the Nationalist uprising has been put down, there must be a peaceable transfer of power to an elected civilian government of all Canguarians.
STRICKLAND: I’m sure that’s reassuring for our allies.
[SNAKEEYE RAISES HIS HAND]
MODERATOR: Go ahead, Senator.
SNAKEEYE: Quite frankly, if Canguari's lower-class 'gene-slaves' were emancipated, the Duke's government would end overnight. We ought to expand our current process of emancipation from Euphemian-controlled Zones to the entirety of Canguari by installing Governor Cross as Administrator of a Canguari military cantonment—
[AUDIENCE APPLAUSE]
AUDIENCE MEMBER: IMPERIALIZTS! Lies! Deceptions! This is what they said when they took over Manae! Brothers and sisters, this is how they annexe Tur-
[MAN PUBLICLY LYNCHED IN THE BACKGROUND AS CAMERAS PAN BACK TO THE DEBATE STAGE]
SNAKEEYE: — after all, it has been Governor Cross's troop commitment that is the largest thus far, outside of Federal Army regular forces.
[CROSS SEEMS SOMEWHAT PLEASANTLY SURPRISED]
CROSS: I heartily agree, Senator. As evidenced by their successful employment in the First Army’s Mederune operations, a cantonment is an effective solution for such issues of the inter-relation of civil and military affairs. I am humbled by your reccomendation that I serve as the head of it, but I must note I support the idea regardless of whether I’m nominated by the relevant officials.
[SCHROEDER INTERJECTS]
SCHROEDER: I do not agree with the viewpoint that the situation in Canguari warrants the establishment of a Cantonment...
CROSS: Senator, you don’t agree with much of any of the foreign policy decisions that have been made in the past thirty years. You would’ve told President Neworder - praise be to his name - that a deployment in Zachod was foolhardy. You would’ve strenuously objected to our valiant efforts in the Transatlantic War to defeat Tangaliro, and you would’ve objected at our rejection of Utsanji encroachment in the Pacific. You are on the foreign policy fringe of our politics.
SCHROEDER: Is this some sort of comment on my family’s military history? Or is this just another attempt by you to snare me? My positions on Utsan are clear enough.
CROSS: Your positions on Utsan are easy to hold when the fighting’s already been done. You would not have had the gumption necessary to obtain the status quo we enjoy now. I must say, I hold substantial disagreements with everyone on this stage. However, Senator Schroeder, you are the only candidate I feel is a genuine danger to our nation. You cannot be trusted with the responsibility of commander-in-chief with such a weak temperament.
[AUDIENCE APPLAUSE]
[STRICKLAND LOUDLY AND EXAGGERATINGLY COUGHS]
CROSS: Strickland, are you alright? Need some water?
STRICKLAND: Yes, I’m fine.—
CLARENDON: —not to interrupt, but the foreign policy Schroeder seems to propose is precisely the weakness and terminal decline those who doubt this great nation accuse us of so often.
[AUDIENCE MURMUR]
SCHROEDER: It’s easy to forget where this nation’s real priorities should lay. The perseverance of our current international relationships, as opposed to foreign escapades to secure new allies which will only end in little change.
SNAKEEYE: Respectfully, Senator, but I believe our military is best fitted to the role of ensuring a nation responsible for almost causing an Ophiric Calamity does not attempt to do so again. Were it not for the quick response of our pilots and sailors, Las Playas would have been bathed in nuclear hellfire last November.
SCHROEDER: I am confident that by the time our President Camden’s term is hopefully concluded, that the process of disarmament will have been accomplished by our men and women in uniform.
CROSS: Senator, disarmament is not a singular event. It is a policy requiring continuing commitment.
MODERATOR: Thank you, gentlemen. Onto the next subject — a topic that we've somewhat begun to touch on, and that is our involvement in Canguari. Governor Cross, go ahead.
CROSS: As commander-in-chief of the Augustan National Guard, I am already taking decisive action regarding the situation in Canguari. I must commend my fellow Governor, Strickland of Engadine, with his good intentions regarding his more modest deployment. The soldiers of the Federal Army and the Engadine National Guard have my deepest respect, but the leadership of both of those insitutions is failing their rank-and-file members. President Camden and Governor Strickland have both deployed Euphemian servicemen, as stated before, without clear-cut objectives. These deployments are not being adequately supported, and that is having consequences. I have had to personally welcome home the caskets of Augustan servicemen who died because President Camden has not supplied adequate aerial support to Euphemian operations in Canguari. Augustan servicemen are stretched thinly throughout the Central Plains due to the Engadine National Guard’s rather quizzical deployment in the mountains near Siracusa. A Cross Administration will take charge of the situation in Canguari, become a primary actor than a reactor, and formulate an objective that we will deliver. That is not a campaign promise to the Euphemian people, but a solemn oath I make to the families of the dead. Their deaths shall not be in vain.
[AUDIENCE APPLAUSE, AUGUSTAN FLAGS WAVING AS CAMERA PANS]
STRICKLAND: Governor Cross, I’m going to have to disagree with your assessment that my state’s troops are deployed solely to the mountains, and by your implication, doing nothing. It is a misunderstanding at best, and intentional misrepresentation of the strategic situation at worst. Engadine’s National Guardsmen fight even today in the streets to Siracusa to try and relieve its inhabitants of an all too fatal siege that the Nationalist’s have established. Our troops also perform much of the logistical work required to keep Euphemian supply routes into Canguari secure and maintained. Without my state’s National Guard units continuously working to establish and expand logistical inlets, supplies for all Euphemian troops in Canguari would find themselves gone overnight. Though I suppose you wouldn’t know, since most of your men are playing security theater in the nationalist-free Central Flatlands.
[AUDIENCE SWOONS]
CROSS: You mean to correct my insinuation that your deployment is useless and perfunctory by proudly declaring you have deployed all too modest a force to root out sectarian violence in a densely populated capital city? You’re responding to an accusation of redundancy by pointing out the immense amount of danger you have put your troops in. As for your testimonials of logistical support, Augustan servicemen have only received supplies flown in by the
Federal Air Force or escorted on the ground by the
Federal Army. Also, to imply that the critical job of Augustan servicemen in preventing the two nationalist pockets from linking up and cutting off Eastern Canguari from allied forces is ‘security theater’ insults the brave men and women giving the Duke you worship a fighting chance.
[AUDIENCE CHANTS "FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT"]
STRICKLAND: Bold of you to assume I worship a man who can’t keep his country together. I think the testimony of every Engadine National Guardsman in Canguari counters your claims, but I feel there’s only one way the Engadinian soldiers abroad will be able to express their thoughts... in the Ring!
CROSS: The first resort of the ignorant is always violence. I’m quite happy to kick your ass back to your mansion, though.
STRICKLAND: I ain’t no pansy like Schroeder, Cross. We ain’t tying this time!
[SCHROEDER ROLLS HIS EYES]
CROSS: That’s right. You’re a Daddy’s Boy trying desperately to live up to the shadow of a President we only talk about because he got shot.
[AUDIENCE GASPS]
STRICKLAND: You won’t EVER put disrespect on a Strickland’s name when I’m done with you, boy!
[CAMERA PANS TO THE RING]
ANNOUNCER: ONCE AGAIN, two candidates face off on the ring — with stakes bigger than ever now, there IS a chance either of these men have the failed parachute, which would make a rather nasty mess...
[CROSS ENTRANCE MUSIC][STRICKLAND ENTRANCE MUSIC][THREE B-6B DAEMON BOMBERS FLY OVER AS ROUND BEGINS]
MODERATOR:
START!ANNOUNCER: CROSS HAS COME OUT FIRST! HE’S MAKING HIS WAY TO RING! HE’S POSING ON THE TOP ROPE! WHAT A PERFORMER!
ANNOUNCER 2: WAIT, WHAT’S THAT UNDER THE RING!
[CAMERA PANS TO A SLIGHT BULGE IN THE TARP UNDER THE RING]
ANNOUNCER: WHAT’S UNDER THERE!?
[STRICKLAND ENTRANCE MUSIC STARTS PLAYING[
[CROSS LOOKS AROUND, CONFUSED]
[STRICKLAND EMERGES FROM UNDER THE RING]
ANNOUNCER: THE GOVERNOR WAS UNDER THE RING! CROSS DOESN’T SEE HIM! BY GOD HE HAS A METAL BASEBALL BAT!
[STRICKLAND WALLOPS CROSS IN THE GROIN]
CROSS: FUCK! SHIT! YOU WON’T GET AWAY WITH THAT DADDY’S BOY!
ANNOUNCER: STRICKLAND’S CIRCLING THE RING! HE KNOWS BETTER THAN TO CLIMB ON THE ROPES WHEN CROSS CAN KNOCK HIM OFF!
ANNOUNCER 2: WAIT… CROSS IS GETTING A RUNUP… HE CAN’T DO WHAT IT SEEMS LIKE HE’S GOING TO DO….
ANNOUNCER: HE IS!!!!!! SUICIDE DIVE!!!!!
[CROSS LEAPS OUT OF THE RING AND ONTO STRICKLAND, THE MEN ROLLING TO THE EDGE OF THE PLATFORM]
[AUDIENCE GOES APESHIT]
ANNOUNCER: BY GOD!!!
EBN ANCHORMAN: BOTH CANDIDATES HAVE PUT THEIR
LIVES ON THE LINE THIS ELECTION!
[FIREWORKS ABOVE]
ANNOUNCER: NATREP polling across Torch is skyrocketing... it'd seem Mayor-Governor Tamanend has closed Morhatten Bridge to control the crowds below! Wait— what is this?!
[STRICKLAND CATCHES CROSS IN A LOCK, CONDUCTS AN ANGLE SLAM]
[AUDIENCE GOES WILD]
ANNOUNCER: BY GOD! GOVERNOR CROSS HAS TAKEN A BEATING!
STRICKLAND: I’d rather be sitting in Esprit over Alexandria any day of my life!
[CROSS STIRRING IN A HEAP]
[SPITS BLOOD OUT OF HIS MOUTH]
ANNOUNCER: BY GOD! HE'S GETTING BACK UP!
CROSS: You’ll be flying in Torch City soon enough, you son of a bitch!
[CROSS HAULS STRICKLAND OVER HIS SHOULDER, SLAMS HIM WITH A ROCK BOTTOM]
CROSS: I DON’T THINK DADDY’S BOY EXPECTED AN ASS WHOOPING WHEN HE TOOK THIS TO THE RING!
ANNOUNCER: I heard his back crack! It was picked up on the mics!
EBN ANCHORMAN: WAIT— THE AUDIENCE IS THROWING THEIR CHAIRS INTO THE RING!
STRICKLAND: Flies stick to shit, Cross, and you keep using the same line!
CROSS: I’m fresh off a motherfucker’s ass, and I’m getting homesick! Get the fuck up!
[CROSS CATCHES A CHAIR AND CRACKS STRICKLAND IN THE SKULL]
[AUDIENCE GOES APESHIT]
ANNOUNCER: BY GOD! HE'S DOWN! CROSS AND STRICKLAND HAVE SEIZED FIRST AND SECOND PLACE!
[CROSS DRAGS STRICKLAND BACK UP ONTO HIS KNEES]
CROSS: I NEED MORE CHAIRS!
[CROSS CONTINUES CATCHING CHAIRS AND CRACKING THEM INTO STRICKLAND’S SKULL, ONCE PR CHAIR]
CROSS: NOT TOO FUCKING SMART NOW, ARE YOU?
Announcer: This is cruelty! He’s beating a broken man!
[STRICKLAND SPITS BLOOD]
STRICKLAND: Still smarter than you… fuckin’ HICK!
CROSS: What the fuck you say to me, city boy? You love the city so much, I’ll give you a fuckin Blume Skyline!
[CROSS HOISTS STRICKLAND INTO A FIREMAN CARRY AND ATTITUDE ADJUSTS HIM OFF OF THE TOWER]CROSS: HOPE YOUR PARACHUTE WORKS SO I CAN KICK YOUR ASS AGAIN!
[AUDIENCE GOES APESHIT]
ANNOUNCER: HE'S FALLING! OH GOD! WILL HIS PARACHUTE WORK?!
[STRICKLAND'S PARACHUTE NARROWLY DEPLOYS]
ANNOUNCER: THANK GOD!
[STRICKLAND LANDS INTO A CHEERING CROWD BELOW]
EBN ANCHORMAN: A VICTORIOUS CROSS EMERGES FROM THE RING... THE AUDIENCE IS GOING ABSOLUTELY WILD AT THE DISPLAY GOING ON HERE!
MODERATOR: Governor Strickland will be joining us on the stage soon enough. Now, let the debates continue. Now, I'll let Governor Cross resume here — the Navy. It's the cornerstone of the Federal military, but critics have cited matters such as our aging capital ships — and the fact we haven't built a single carrier in 20 years — as 'evidence' that the Federal States is in decline. It's well known that Senator Snakeeye has backed a navy proposal for a new carrier, dubbed CVN-128. Senator Clarendon, on the other hand, proposes we revive the almost five-hundred year old FSS Augusta and modernize it into a fire support ship. What do you intend to do about the Federal Navy's current state?
CROSS: Thank you, moderator. It’s my firm belief that the Federal States’ Navy is, as you said, essential to our global power projection capabilities. However, I don’t believe that either of the prominent ‘solutions’ are promising for our Naval strength. CVN-128 is a design without a necessity, as it provides at best marginal or incremental improvements over the Alexandria class. R&D costs in addition to base procurement would hamper our Navy’s ability to recapitalize our surface warfare capabilities. Ever since the Utsanji Wars, the FSN has focused on expeditionary power projection rather than the traditional business of ship-killing. Our skills have, in that area, atrophied. With the resurgence of opposing powers like the People’s Republic of Sinica, we must renew that capability. Senator Clarendon’s proposed modernization of the FSS Augusta is a dereliction of our responsibility to our sailors to provide them a modern vessel capable of safely conducting national security operations. I propose a joint program with our continental partner the Federal Republic of North Ophir to create a ‘BCGN’ - guided nuclear battlecruiser. This BCGN would be a purebred anti-ship vessel, and build off the successful groundwork of the CSGN project. The funds saved from this much less ambitious project can be rededicated to procurement of smaller surface vessels such as frigates and destroyers. BCGN will free up those assets from anti-ship warfare they are ill-suited for and allow them to fully focus on the littoral patrol and air defense they are specialized for.
[SNAKEEYE RAISES HIS HAND]
SNAKEEYE: Governor, while the Alexandria-class has accommodated many new technologies over the decades, its ability to support the most recent technical advances is becoming increasingly limited. Its artificial intelligences grow obsolete, its power generation capabilities insufficient. Upgrades over the decades have increased the Alexandria's weight and eroded the center-of-gravity margin that keeps them consistently stable. The CVN-128 program introduces a larger flight deck, a smaller island, Electromagnetic Aircraft Launch System and an Advanced Arresting Gear. With the CVN-128 proposal expected to generate three times the power and 25% more sorties, and host the forefront in Euphemian advanced artificial intelligence, and generally make deployment a much more tolerable affair for its crew. The Alexandria-class's ability to serve us in this brave new world is growing increasingly limited, and we ought to have a reasonable strategy to replace it accordingly.
CROSS: The Alexandria-class does require a replacement, on that we agree. We disagree as to the ‘when’ and the ‘how.’ It is my belief that surface life extension programs are the appropriate manner to keep the Alexandrias combat-relevant, as we await for the technology you’re recommending to mature. Carriers are the centerpiece of our fleet, and to experience teething issues pertaining to new technology could be disastrous for combat readiness. Our northern ally experienced this issue during the replacement of their Leviathan class with the Continental class - there is a reason Euphemian carriers saw much more combat in the Pacific than the North Ophirics during the Utsanji Wars.
[STRICKLAND RETURNS TO THE STAGE]
[AUDIENCE SWOONS]
ANNOUNCER: HE'S BRUISED, BUT CERTAINLY NOT BEATEN!
MODERATOR: Governor Strickland, many candidates here propose a variety of solutions to modernizing the Federal Navy. Some propose modernizing the ancient Augusta-class battleship, others suggest a new nuclear carrier to replace the aging Alexandria-class, while Governor Cross proposes a 'nuclear battlecruiser' as a new class of capital ship in the fleet. What is your stance on the Federal Navy's modernization program?
STRICKLAND: Modernizing a pre-Calamity battleship just for the sake of it is a waste of money and intentional desecration of a true artifact of the past. That being said… I think a new carrier is the best way forward to continue projecting our power across the oceans. A ‘nuclear battlecruiser’ might sound nice and fancy, but I much prefer having ninety aircraft on a floating airfield able to respond to situations.
CROSS: And when that situation is an enemy ship, those ninety aircraft take far too long to sortie to be combat effective. Carriers provide a valuable expeditionary capability, but the best way to eliminate an enemy ship is with a ship of our own.
SNAKEEYE: The destroyers, cruisers and nuclear strike cruisers of the Federal Navy prove adequate in the defensive role of protecting our carriers.
CROSS: At the expense of the expeditionary capability you want to send tens of billions dollars developing, Senator. A jack of all trades is a master of none. A destroyer tasked with fire support, area air defense, anti submarine warfare, and anti submarine warfare will succeed at none of them. A battlecruiser tasked with anti surface warfare will excel at the craft.
CLARENDON: You propose nuclear battlecruisers with pseudo-stealth that is, as you once put it to General Temple, much akin to a .50 to a prisoner's head — overkill. It is an expense of money — and to ignore the strategic value of our pre-Calamity vessels is to ignore an untapped cost-effective solution. Regardless of whether it is a battlecruiser or a battle
ship — the Sinicans would have immense difficulty bringing such honorable hulls down.
MODERATOR: Thank you, gentlemen. Now, a topic of contention in recent months — the Federation of Kael, and the extent of its military involvement in southern Ophir. Some see it as a force for good benefitting Euphemian policy, others see it as a corrupt state fermenting war and provoking military action from Regentor to Canguari, invading Floriana's western archipelagos and establishing the 'Republic of West Floriana', and arming Canguari to such an extent that it was easily capable of inflicting mass destruction in Florian cities like Jacotlan. Some would say they are our ally — but
some would say they are directly responsible for the present situation in south Ophir. Senator Schroeder, you may begin.
SCHROEDER: Thank you. It has been my stance that Euphemie should have limited its involvement in South Ophir’s conflicts to the most minimal presence possible, and to a certain extend, that applies also to the Federation. I feel that Kael’s support of various states, such as the Canguarian government we now support which brought the cities Jacotlan and Sanchez to ruin, is counter-intuitive to the common desire of peace in Ophir.
SNAKEEYE: Which is why we ought to establish a cantonment in Canguari!
MODERATOR: Governor Cross, what is your stance on the Federation?
CROSS: The Federation is a vital regional partner in our efforts for Ophiric stability. They don’t always act in our best interest, and at those times remedial action must be taken. It’s a give-and-take relationship, but I personally believe it’s vital that nations such as Kael and Alvimia step up and take responsibility as regional leaders in their respective neighborhoods. It makes our position much more tenable, and an Ophiric order a reality rather than a dream. The diktats of Torch City and Telos are little more than words on paper without regional allies.
MODERATOR: Thank you. Senator Clarendon?
CLARENDON: Their irresponsible support for the Duchy was buildup to the November Incident that could've very well killed countless innocent Velezian citizens. We need not speak of hypotheticals, of course — the smoldering ruins of cities like Sanchez, Jacotlan and Tlexochtlitla speak measures of the Duchy's regard for human life, and the morality of those who backed such military actions. I believe Canguari is an Euphemo-Alvimian responsibility, not a Kaelic one.
[SNAKEEYE RAISES HIS HAND]
MODERATOR: Senator Snakeeye, go ahead.
SNAKEEYE: While myself and President Camden disagree on many things, we hold mutual agreement on the matter that Kael is a vital ally. However, I find the fact that high members of Kael's government perceive our cautious, humane approach to Ophiric politics to be 'weakness'... quite frankly, insulting. The era of 'bombing cities to the ground' ended twenty-nine years ago in the hellfire of the former Sacred Union State, when our brave airmen vanquished Novus Concordia. We are not in southern Ophir to send our men to die in proxy wars to fund the military industrial complex... we are in southern Ophir to uphold the interests of the Federal States and her allies. I believe a degree of 'mutual respect' is to be, naturally, demanded of this.
MODERATOR: Thank you, Senator.
[STRICKLAND RAISES HIS HAND]
MODERATOR: Go ahead, Governor.
STRICKLAND: My position is that the Federation of Kael’s various actions in Southern Ophir are entirely and wholly dangerous and reckless. In the past year, it has supported a Duke which, as more than one of my colleagues stated previously, flattened three cities. It then went on to, for no real reason or rhyme throw it’s backing to a certain state which claims Velezian territory, fired ballistic missiles into Courburg without warning, and has actively stated its intention to single-handedly try and remove Akhmanari influence from South Ophir. Its leaders are UPPITY and have pursued policies well out of-
MODERATOR: Is holding back Akhmanari influence not among the goals of the Euphemian deployment to Velezia, Governor Strickland?
STRICKLAND: It is. I think our military is more than capable of doing such. I feel that a minor West Ophiric state attempting to take on the same responsibility is… how do I say it? Crossing the bounds? I question their motives in Daernel, is the point I try to make. One of their government figures remarked, ‘the Federation of Kael is not looking to play regional police’, but that seems to be precisely what they are doing.
MODERATOR: Thank you, Governor. Now, this would've been the last subject of this debate, but it appears Mayor-Governor Tamanend attempted to close all bridges into Morhatten to stifle the sheer public uproar this event is creating. There's been a recent spree of 'closed highways' and 'closed bridges' as both President Camden and Mayor Tamanend vie for control — if anything, that's been their primary. Senator Snakeeye, you're welcome to offer your opinion on the blatant corruption evident in the Federalist Party's politics?
SNAKEEYE: Quite frankly, the Torch City establishment runs the place as if they were a mafia. The entire goddamn city's become their bordello, all at the expense of the working class. Public infrastructure should not be a political tool, and as President I will see that no petty intragovernmental disputes halt the efficiency of this great republic.
MODERATOR: Of course, Senator. Governor Strickland, your take on your Senator's statement?
STRICKLAND: Agreed. Mayor-Governor Tamanend is a corrupt sun’va’bitch, and if he wins this election, I’m packing my bags and moving to Sanjar!
[AUDIENCE LAUGHTER]
MODERATOR: Thank you, Governor. Senator Clarendon, you've got the go-ahead.
CLARENDON: To put it simply, Euphemie is represented by much more than one massive state. This election, we ought to tear down the notion that the states of this great nation are but mere subjects to the political and economic dominance of a single city acting as a socio-politico-economic demiurge. Political revolution, ladies and gentlemen — from the ballot box to Collis Palatium. The Federalists have felt entitled to the leadership of this country for far too long, and I quote our Party's great leader from a century ago, 89th President George I-Ain't-Got-No-Time O'Brien when I say: I ain't gonna stand for this shit no more!
[AUDIENCE APPLAUSE]
MODERATOR: Thank you, Senator. Governor Cross, go ahead.
CROSS: None of us disagree with the sentiments expressed. The Federalists have felt too entitled for too long. But we’re not gonna beat them without presenting an alternate view for this beautiful city. Torch City shouldn’t dominate our union, but we would be remiss to deny it’s our beating heart. We need to promote a new Euphemie, inclusive of all and providing a chance for all to succeed. We need to reinvest the wealth generated in our great finance centers in Blume and put that to work sending Cantenite farmers’ children to school. We need to use the civil engineering experience that made the Pence Canal possible to rebuild Torch City’s crumbling infrastructure. We need to, as a nation, reckon with the nebulous influence of moneyed interests that have interests contrary to the interests of our democracy and our citizens. We need to crack down on the manipulative practice of drug syndicates, and we need to create a universal equality of opportunity. Until we’ve done that, we must continue striving towards a Most Perfect Union.
[AUDIENCE APPLAUSE]
MODERATOR: A most perfect union indeed... Senator Schroeder, any closing statements for the Euphemian people?
SCHROEDER: I just want to reassure the Euphemian nation and people, that whatever political differences we may have, whatever social or economic divisions, our forebears have beared much worse. At the end of the day, Euphemie is a great nation, and we will stay winning. Whatever the result of the primaries, and the election to come after that, we will overcome whatever lies ahead of us! Hail Fern, Hail Neworder, and may God save Euphemie!
CROSS: And as my black concert-goers often like to remark, come election day, the only appropriate response to the Federalist People will be a curt, two-word retort. “Hoes mad.”
[AUDIENCE GOES APESHIT, B-6B FLYOVER, FIREWORKS]
ANNOUNCER: We've got quite the uproar on the streets of Torch City after our candidates' statements... wait, what is this?! Senator Strickland's walked over to the edge!
STRICKLAND: Hey, everyone, get over here! I wanna say something to Tamanend!
[NATIONAL REPUBLICAN CANDIDATES GATHER AT THE EDGE OF 2 AEC]
STRICKLAND: Moderators welcome! Come one, come all!
EBN ANCHORMAN: It appears the entire debate stage, moderator included, are headin' to the edge...
[STRICKLAND ASSUMES THICK ENGADINIAN DRAWL]
STRICKLAND: TAMANEND, RESIGN BITCH!
[AUDIENCE FOLLOWS IN CHANT]
CROSS: I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY AS WELL!
CROSS: AT PRESIDENT CAMDEN, FUCK YOU!
STRICKLAND: FUCK CAMDEN!
ANNOUNCER: BY GOD! Reports coming in of riots on the streets... this has been an explosive debate to end the prelude to the 423 National Republican primaries. Do the National Republicans have a chance at tipping the scale and creating a political revolution?