The Purasian Diplomatic Forum (MT/INVITE ONLY)

[Gourmand]

The Gourmandian ambassador was quick to comment on the questionnaire...

"Gourmand believes that other nations should increase their spending. I mean honestly, have you seen how profitable war is? The last continental war was a godsend for us. Unfortunately those peace lovers in the old BFU government ended the war... imagine how many more millions could have we made off that war had it continued.... *sighs* . And I strongly advise the Pindian Republic to start intervening in wars. We could have made 2 billion USD had you entered... then we would have been able to give... *sobs*... billionaires and big businesses tax cuts. *bursts into tears* . ALL THAT PROFIT WASTED!"

*Gulps down alcohol*

[FPPCIE]

The Gourmandian ambassador was quick to comment on the questionnaire...

"Gourmand believes that other nations should increase their spending. I mean honestly, have you seen how profitable war is? The last continental war was a godsend for us. Unfortunately those peace lovers in the old BFU government ended the war... imagine how many more millions could have we made off that war had it continued.... *sighs* . And I strongly advise the Pindian Republic to start intervening in wars. We could have made 2 billion USD had you entered... then we would have been able to give... *sobs*... billionaires and big businesses tax cuts. *bursts into tears* . ALL THAT PROFIT WASTED!"

The Grand CEO vehemently lashed out at the ambassador. "You sell a pirated pre-war version of Profitism. Except you have no values behind your intense greed. Maybe we aren't as lavish as you, but our money goes into making us the foremost ministry power in Purasia. While you buy, say, $5 Billion Dollar pillows. Waste. Gain must always be tempered by Wisdom, of which you have none. And maybe you should put some of your money into buying an exercise program fatso."

[Gourmand]

The Gourmandian ambassador was quick to comment on the questionnaire...

"Gourmand believes that other nations should increase their spending. I mean honestly, have you seen how profitable war is? The last continental war was a godsend for us. Unfortunately those peace lovers in the old BFU government ended the war... imagine how many more millions could have we made off that war had it continued.... *sighs* . And I strongly advise the Pindian Republic to start intervening in wars. We could have made 2 billion USD had you entered... then we would have been able to give... *sobs*... billionaires and big businesses tax cuts. *bursts into tears* . ALL THAT PROFIT WASTED!"

The Grand CEO vehemently lashed out at the ambassador. "You sell a pirated pre-war version of Profitism. Except you have no values behind your intense greed. Maybe we aren't as lavish as you, but our money goes into making us the foremost ministry power in Purasia. While you buy, say, $5 Billion Dollar pillows. Waste. Gain must always be tempered by Wisdom, of which you have none. And maybe you should put some of your money into buying an exercise program fatso."

The Gourmandian Ambassador shrugged off the comments, scoffing down a huge sandwich prepped by his slaves. After swallowing he said:

"You FeruMavs are too... restraint by *almost vomits* morals to actually reach true prosperity. Profitism in the FPPCIE doesn't put profits first and that's why it will always fail. The Ferumavian state is like an octopus strangling the rich and big businesses: refusing to do what is required to reach true prosperity. Profitism is inherently anti-business (too much govt control) and allows for little free enterprise. We are no profitists... The Gourmand government doesn't need *sniggers* wisdom, it follows the smell of money like a rabid predator stalks its prey. And exercise program? Pfft, there are more important things. Subsidising and legalising forced labour by corporations for example. Although you shouldn't feel too angry, 99.7% of all slaves are former criminals.... the others well... I'm not allowed to say. Oh and one more thing, 5 million dollar pillows aren't a waste of money... We have a huge budget surplus and need those pillows so our bums don't get sore. Anyway we have recently announced 600 million worth of spending cuts so we can afford plenty and give.... Guess what... TAX CUTS FOR BILLIONAIRES. *giggles like schoolgirl*."

[The Siblings]

The two ambassadors from the Republic of The Siblings arrive wearing matching green and white shirts designed to be reminiscent of sports jerseys, with "AMBASSADOR" written between the shoulders. However, these shirts have been carefully tucked into their well-creased dress pants, which somewhat spoils the effect. Both the man and the woman are tall and of mixed race, with the similar facial features of siblings. Ignoring the other delegates, they site down, prop their feet up on the table, (revealing green and white Converse shoes decorated with religious symbols,) and begin streaming a sporting event on their Official Laptop.

[Newan]

The only foreign country the Empire of Newan trades and meets regularly is our close ally the FPPCIE. We highly doubt they would be against military spending so there for no other opinions matter to us.

We have been working towards relying less on others by cutting foreign trade and become more self sufficient minus our important trade and military agreements with the FPPCIE.

[FPPCIE]

We should come up with a international student learning program. So we can, "diversify" the minds of Purasia's young college/university students. It could take place as Profitia as a hub.

[BFU]

"BFUian Military spending has been increasing exponentially in the past few years. This hike in spending has been paid for by the almost complete abolition of the welfare state. Which is all good.

The BFU believes in keeping trade alive because of the inevitably that will engage in it. The old fascist government tried self sufficiency but they still needed to engage with other nations. As many around this table will know, we believe in forming trade agreements which benefit everyone, in fact we subsidise trade often with nations who we like.

This learning program idea sounds good. But it'll take some time to setup. "

[Gourmand]

The Gourmandian Ambassador said, regarding the learning program proposition.

"We think this a good idea. However we wouldn't want this program to be funded by the governments of Purasia, that'd be blatant communism. What we need is a corporation who will set up this school. We invest in them so they can build it & when the school opens, the corporation will announce an introduction of fees for students in order to enter it. Granted this may put some off, but a large bulk of Purasian students will still turn out their pockets. Even better, we could make entrance to this program compulsory and make up a whole new qualification for it .INSTANT PROFIT. It's a great source of income for our countries! Taking advantage of the desire of students to succeed. But don't feel too bad for them, they'll leave significantly better people. So...thoughts?"

[Pindai]

http://www.nationstates.net/page=dispatch/id=400707

[Pindian Republic]

We should come up with a international student learning program. So we can, "diversify" the minds of Purasia's young college/university students. It could take place as Profitia as a hub.

This seems like a good idea. But I would suggest having it take place in all capitals of participating nations.

[FPPCIE]

The Gourmandian Ambassador said, regarding the learning program proposition.

"We think this a good idea. However we wouldn't want this program to be funded by the governments of Purasia, that'd be blatant communism. What we need is a corporation who will set up this school. We invest in them so they can build it & when the school opens, the corporation will announce an introduction of fees for students in order to enter it. Granted this may put some off, but a large bulk of Purasian students will still turn out their pockets. Even better, we could make entrance to this program compulsory and make up a whole new qualification for it .INSTANT PROFIT. It's a great source of income for our countries! Taking advantage of the desire of students to succeed. But don't feel too bad for them, they'll leave significantly better people. So...thoughts?"

"I don't know if you've noticed...but the FPPCIE government is just a giant corporation. Why make it cumpulsory? People don't like being told what to do, and more freedom to do what you want equals more profit for the FPPCIE. "

A general walked into the room, whispered something in the CEO's Ear, and left.
"And, apparently, there's been an attack on the PR by terrorists. Maybe they should use their military to put them down... Oh wait..."

[Gourmand]

The Gourmandian Ambassador said, regarding the learning program proposition.

"We think this a good idea. However we wouldn't want this program to be funded by the governments of Purasia, that'd be blatant communism. What we need is a corporation who will set up this school. We invest in them so they can build it & when the school opens, the corporation will announce an introduction of fees for students in order to enter it. Granted this may put some off, but a large bulk of Purasian students will still turn out their pockets. Even better, we could make entrance to this program compulsory and make up a whole new qualification for it .INSTANT PROFIT. It's a great source of income for our countries! Taking advantage of the desire of students to succeed. But don't feel too bad for them, they'll leave significantly better people. So...thoughts?"

"I don't know if you've noticed...but the FPPCIE government is just a giant corporation. Why make it cumpulsory? People don't like being told what to do, and more freedom to do what you want equals more profit for the FPPCIE. "
"

The Gourmandian Ambassador snorted and then calmly said:
" When I referred to a corporation that would set this up, I was not talking about the pseudo non-profit "corporation" of the FPPCIE but a private business that specialises in education, I already have some businesses who are interested in this idea and all they need is a green light and a wad of cash. Besides, unlike a nation, these businesses have no political motivations which ensures balance and no favouritism. Also, your statement on freedom is a half-truth. Excessive economic freedom is good coupled with moderate personal/poltical freedoms. But keep in mind: Higher consciousness of population = Less profit. You need to strike a balance when it comes to your citizen's freedoms especially with a country like yours which carelessly hop scotches back and forth from totalitarianism and freedom thereby sowing the seeds of dissent. Your jingoistic foreign policy is probably the one of the only things keeping you afloat.

And I never said we had to make it compulsory. But the profit would be huge if we did and that profit would be split up between the countries of Purasia."

[The vile league of evil]

The Supreme Emperor Of Villainous Evil and ten bodyguards enter the room. This starts playing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yZuL0opq96c

"The Supreme Emperor Of Villainous Evil has arrived. Bow down to me mortals! I'm not too fond of diplomacy, but I'm not in the mood for mass murder today, so I'm here to discuss the issues that affect our my nation. But there are some rules you must accept:
1. I'm always right, even when I'm not.
2. You'll refer to me as "The Supreme Emperor Of Villainous Evil" every time.
3. If you don't accept the first two rules I'll nuke your country.

Is that clear? Okay, let the fun of diplomacy begin."

[BFU]

The BFUian Ambassador, who had served the BFU in the Foreign Office since the early days of the fascist regime, had not met the leader of the Vile League of Evil in person, only his envoys, (all of whom were extremely rude and were prone to angry outbursts). He never took the time to learn the leader's name and always abbreviated it to T.S.E.O.V.E . He didn't even know what the "E" stood for anymore. Still, he had questions for this emperor.

"So, The Supreme Emperor Of Villainous E..... *looks in notepad* .... vil? What do you think of the recent developments on the continent?"

[BFU]

The BFUian Ambassador, who had served the BFU in the Foreign Office since the early days of the fascist regime, had not met the leader of the Vile League of Evil in person, only his envoys, (all of whom were extremely rude and were prone to angry outbursts). He never took the time to learn the leader's name and always abbreviated it to T.S.E.O.V.E . He didn't even know what the "E" stood for anymore. Still, he had questions for this emperor.

"So, The Supreme Emperor Of Villainous E..... *looks in notepad* .... vil? What do you think of the recent developments on the continent?"

*bump*

[Newan]

The Supreme Emperor Of Villainous Evil and ten bodyguards enter the room. This starts playing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yZuL0opq96c

"The Supreme Emperor Of Villainous Evil has arrived. Bow down to me mortals! I'm not too fond of diplomacy, but I'm not in the mood for mass murder today, so I'm here to discuss the issues that affect our my nation. But there are some rules you must accept:
1. I'm always right, even when I'm not.
2. You'll refer to me as "The Supreme Emperor Of Villainous Evil" every time.
3. If you don't accept the first two rules I'll nuke your country.

Is that clear? Okay, let the fun of diplomacy begin."

"Haha cute threats Dr. Evil. But my Empire is not afraid of you." Spoke Emperor Newan. "However I like the way you think, so I am not willing to do anything drastic at this time. Besides your nation is on the other side of the continent well out of nuking range. Not that anything would get through our latest missle defence program."

[The-All-Father]

"All must bow and worship the great leader himself" spoke a delegate for the divine being known simply as The-All-Father. "If not you will face his infinite wrath"

[FPPCIE]

The Supreme Emperor Of Villainous Evil and ten bodyguards enter the room. This starts playing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yZuL0opq96c

"The Supreme Emperor Of Villainous Evil has arrived. Bow down to me mortals! I'm not too fond of diplomacy, but I'm not in the mood for mass murder today, so I'm here to discuss the issues that affect our my nation. But there are some rules you must accept:
1. I'm always right, even when I'm not.
2. You'll refer to me as "The Supreme Emperor Of Villainous Evil" every time.
3. If you don't accept the first two rules I'll nuke your country.

Is that clear? Okay, let the fun of diplomacy begin."

The Grand CEO grinned. "I feel really bad for the kid who's holding that stereo. Here, give him this Nat-Piece. So, Dr. Evil, what do you hope to achieve from this conference? Other than finding a reason for war? Because if you're foolish enough to start a war right now then your nation doesn't deserve to exist. Can someone give me one reason these guys are here? And also, My VP of Marketing would like to speak. A small, frail man will a glint to his eye leans over the mic and taps it. "My name is Mitchell Gordön. As you all know, the anniversary of the Continental War is coming up. I was hoping we could collectively come up with a way to honor it and let it serve as a warning. We want to glorify the brave men and women who died but also curb any jingoism.."

[BFU]

The Supreme Emperor Of Villainous Evil and ten bodyguards enter the room. This starts playing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yZuL0opq96c

"The Supreme Emperor Of Villainous Evil has arrived. Bow down to me mortals! I'm not too fond of diplomacy, but I'm not in the mood for mass murder today, so I'm here to discuss the issues that affect our my nation. But there are some rules you must accept:
1. I'm always right, even when I'm not.
2. You'll refer to me as "The Supreme Emperor Of Villainous Evil" every time.
3. If you don't accept the first two rules I'll nuke your country.

Is that clear? Okay, let the fun of diplomacy begin."

Can someone give me one reason these guys are here? "

The BFUian Ambassador had the answer to that question:

"Well, this nation was a part of the Glorious Confederacy meaning that it is still linked with the BFU diplomatically. This and the fact that the vile league of evil is one of the three major powers on the continent was reason enough for them to be here. However..... delusional they may seem."

[FPPCIE]

Can someone give me one reason these guys are here? "

In my younger days, I'd just nuke them. But, apparently after we got rid of the Wamps, and the Tallmadgeans. other nations find don't our clensings "morally appropriate."
The BFUian Ambassador had the answer to that question:

"Well, this nation was a part of the Glorious Confederacy meaning that it is still linked with the BFU diplomatically. This and the fact that the vile league of evil is one of the three major powers on the continent was reason enough for them to be here. However..... delusional they may seem."

[Pindian Republic]

"All must bow and worship the great leader himself" spoke a delegate for the divine being known simply as The-All-Father. "If not you will face his infinite wrath"

This flag is familiar... If I recall correctly another insane dictatorship used it before this "All-Father" guy.

[The vile league of evil]

"All must bow and worship the great leader himself" spoke a delegate for the divine being known simply as The-All-Father. "If not you will face his infinite wrath"

"Hahaha! I will not worship you. You're a false god. I am the one and only God on this planet.

But really, making your stupid citizens believe that you are a God is a good way to stay in charge, I'd recommend it to all of you mortals"

[The vile league of evil]

The BFUian Ambassador, who had served the BFU in the Foreign Office since the early days of the fascist regime, had not met the leader of the Vile League of Evil in person, only his envoys, (all of whom were extremely rude and were prone to angry outbursts). He never took the time to learn the leader's name and always abbreviated it to T.S.E.O.V.E . He didn't even know what the "E" stood for anymore. Still, he had questions for this emperor.

"So, The Supreme Emperor Of Villainous E..... *looks in notepad* .... vil? What do you think of the recent developments on the continent?"

"I don't really care about the continent. I'll nuke anyone if I feel like it, if I don't I'll just sit and watch your argue with each other, it really is quite entertaining."

[BFU]

The BFUian Ambassador had the answer to that question:

"Well, this nation was a part of the Glorious Confederacy meaning that it is still linked with the BFU diplomatically. This and the fact that the vile league of evil is one of the three major powers on the continent was reason enough for them to be here. However..... delusional they may seem."

In my younger days, I'd just nuke them. But, apparently after we got rid of the Wamps, and the Tallmadgeans. other nations find don't our clensings "morally appropriate."

The BFUian Ambassador said in reply to the FeruMavian representative : "Well, with all the nuke defence systems on Purasia nowadays nuclear weapons border on useless. Something I don't think some people here have grasped yet."

[FPPCIE]

In my younger days, I'd just nuke them. But, apparently after we got rid of the Wamps, and the Tallmadgeans. other nations find don't our clensings "morally appropriate."

The BFUian Ambassador said in reply to the FeruMavian representative : "Well, with all the nuke defence systems on Purasia nowadays nuclear weapons border on useless. Something I don't think some people here have grasped yet."

"Doesn't hurt to keep them. Sadly, because of that, alternative weapons, such as bio-chem hazards and things of that nature have had to be developed. Don't mess with us, or you'll wake up with melting lungs."
The Grand CEO winked.