Your nation's British invasion plan

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How would your nation invade Britain?

We come by sea
We would do an air-borne invasion
We would go through tunnels or other underground route
We would invade from space
We do not have the capacity to invade the British, but we could try to blockade or blitz them into submission
We cannot successfully attack Britain
We have not heard of Britain / Britain ceased to exist in this timeline/ we are Britain
Total votes : 149

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La Cosa Fedora
Posts: 596
Founded: Jul 26, 2016

Your nation's British invasion plan

Postby La Cosa Fedora » Wed May 30, 2018 5:21 pm

After an incident where British intelligence has finally gone too far, you decide to end the threat posed by perfidious Albion once and for all. Many have tried and many have failed what you now attempt. Will you join the Romans, the Anglo-Saxons, and the Normans as successful invaders, or will your name be mentioned along with the Spanish armada, the numerous rulers of France who could only dream of crossing the channel, and Hitler?

For LCF such an invasion would surely be a trivial matter, since we can use superior technology (which comes from being enlightened by our own intelligence) and knowledge of the blade to attain air supremacy and domination of the seas. Also our path would be well prepared by hacking their military and using support of anyone on that island who happens to heed the call of the mighty fedora. We would make short work of British resistance in order to be prepared to face their NATO allies, the UN security council, or some combination thereof.

Or if we don't feel like doing an invasion we can just capture every single source of tea and jack up prices until the queen herself begs us for mercy.

The peace treaty would probably see the UK balkanized into its separate parts with governments that are subservient to our will, and may host our military garrisons for some time to come. Or alternatively we can force on them all the parts of their colonial empire back which are currently in a position of disputed ownership, e.g. Israel/Palestine, Kashmir, etc. Just for the lulz.
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Posts: 994
Founded: Aug 15, 2012
Left-wing Utopia

Postby Carena » Wed May 30, 2018 10:15 pm

If there was ever an attempted British rebellion, we would simply deploy several squadrons of mechanized robotic infantry from an orbiting military base to put down the insurrection.

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Posts: 262
Founded: Apr 13, 2018
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Kyneland » Wed May 30, 2018 10:59 pm

We do not have the capabilities to effectively attack Britain. And besides, although we find them deeply misguided and even stupid, they’re our ally.
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Posts: 303
Founded: May 31, 2017
Iron Fist Consumerists

Postby Vlasdol » Thu Aug 09, 2018 6:08 pm

We'll just stay right where we are.
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Holy Marsh
Posts: 5092
Founded: Nov 09, 2007
Father Knows Best State

Postby Holy Marsh » Thu Aug 09, 2018 6:12 pm

It would be of little difficulty or notability to invade the British Isles over the seas and subdue it.
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Postmaster of the Fleet
Posts: 26809
Founded: Mar 11, 2010
Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby Auzkhia » Thu Aug 09, 2018 8:24 pm

The Imperial and Royal Air Force would try to cripple their navy and defense capabilities before mounting troops, we have the advantage in an army battle, but the Imperial and Royal Kriegsmarine always was a bit behind the British Royal Navy. But if France helps us, we could break through with more ships. But if the British Army invaded, they would be routed since they would have to deal with landing, wrestling for air and sea control, and then worrying about getting through our vast Empire.

1v1: Probably a stalemate since we'd be about evenly matched, but failure to successfully invade the island is lucky, but that's the hardest part since the Army has the capacity to occupy and pacify Great Britain. We would have to rely on some diplomacy, if Britain is isolated, we can arrange a coalition, but if we find ourselves alone, then it'd be too difficult.
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Posts: 267
Founded: Aug 16, 2017
Corporate Bordello

Postby Marcianus » Thu Aug 09, 2018 8:47 pm

I wouldn't want to attack Britain, but if we had too, we'd need spaceships since we're on Mars.
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Posts: 3808
Founded: Mar 27, 2011
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Vallermoore » Thu Aug 09, 2018 8:56 pm

We would send our fleet, army and air force, with nukes only used if Britain used nukes first. We are not an aggressive country and have only had one war in recent times, however.

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Changeling Badlands
Posts: 35
Founded: Jun 08, 2018

Postby Changeling Badlands » Thu Aug 09, 2018 9:02 pm

We would send in changelings to kidnap and replace the country's leaders and top 1%, and change the country's policies to favour Changelings.

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Civil Servant
Posts: 8
Founded: Jun 26, 2018

Postby Swiabar » Thu Aug 09, 2018 9:04 pm

Nuke em

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A m e n r i a
Posts: 2265
Founded: Jun 08, 2017
Democratic Socialists

Postby A m e n r i a » Thu Aug 09, 2018 9:07 pm

If Britain decides to rebel, we'll surround them with soldiers from the rest of our European Colony. As powerful as the British may be thanks to our equipment and training, we still have numbers in our advantage, with the presence of the French, Germans, and Spanish. If that's not enough, we can send in some warriors from the mainland or ask for Turkish, Arabian, or Vatican aid. If all else fails, Heavenly Emperor Cheonsa has a big red button on his throne for an awesome, scifi-like reason.
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Posts: 190
Founded: Sep 06, 2016
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy

Postby Baalkistann » Thu Aug 09, 2018 9:10 pm

My nation really has no reason to go to war with Britain, but if we did it wouldn’t be much trouble. We’d just park the navy outside London, bombard the city into oblivion, land troops, and crush their military until they decided to surrender.

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Posts: 2371
Founded: Jan 25, 2015

Postby Reutoa » Thu Aug 09, 2018 9:14 pm

With the Imperial Navy being overwhelmingly more powerful then the British, we’ll just crush them and land our forces all over the English Coast. With Operation Bloody Mary underway we then bomb every military installation and paratroop units all over England. With more then 300,00 solders in the British Isles in less then 24 hours the British should be shocked and too stunned to be able to offer effective leadership to their country, and if they don’t then we will nuke London and be done with it.
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Civil Servant
Posts: 7
Founded: Aug 08, 2018

Postby Nafles » Thu Aug 09, 2018 9:15 pm

we are difficult to attack Britain. their radar technology is more advanced than us.

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Post Czar
Posts: 34240
Founded: Nov 13, 2011

Postby Luziyca » Thu Aug 09, 2018 9:18 pm

While it is true that we have invasion plans for various fictional entities, in addition to real entities in Esquarium, in order for those drafting war plans to get good at writing them up, there is no invasion plan for "Britain," "Albion," "England," or anything remotely similar to it.
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Posts: 2127
Founded: May 19, 2017
Civil Rights Lovefest

Postby Arthropol » Thu Aug 09, 2018 9:27 pm

(assuming no alliances)
First, we would wait for the UK to declare war on us, as we are neutral and are not allowed to attack anyone unless they declared war on us, or attacked us. If they used nukes, we would nuke back, and WW3. If no nukes, we would first sign a deal with our close allies France to use their northern coast for our military, and then slowly invade and occupy with our superior military. After defeat, all their remaining military equipment and nukes would be transferred to us, and then the UK split into small countries, with large cities being annexed by Arthropol. Commonwealth countries would be forced to become republics, or accept the King of Arthropol as their monarch. All Brits will be forced to learn French, drink wine, and eat baguettes and cheese.
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Second Empire of America
Chargé d'Affaires
Posts: 486
Founded: Feb 23, 2018

Postby Second Empire of America » Fri Aug 10, 2018 1:08 am

Britain has weapons of mass destruction. We have weapons of mass destruction. Consequently, invading Britain is not worth the cost in lives, no matter how annoyed we are by Brexit. We had plans for landing our army on the west coast of Scotland and marching to quickly take London if war broke out during the Cold War*, but this was a last resort as we don't want to fight another nuclear power.

*Our timeline's Cold War involved the UK as a third superpower that rivaled both us and the USSR.
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Cyberlife Group
Posts: 23
Founded: Aug 08, 2018

Postby Cyberlife Group » Fri Aug 10, 2018 1:12 am

We drop deviant androids who hate humans and they’d try to kill them, after we get rid of the deviants and send good androids and rehabilitate the area with Americans who like Cyberlife.

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Constitutional Technocracy of Minecraft
Posts: 3374
Founded: Jul 14, 2016

Postby Constitutional Technocracy of Minecraft » Fri Aug 10, 2018 3:18 am

We live in a parallel universe, so Britain doesn't exist on our Earth. If it did and we wanted to invade, we would carry out an air/space-based invasion. We have massively superior military technology to 2018 Britain, let alone 1940s Britain.
Last edited by Constitutional Technocracy of Minecraft on Fri Aug 10, 2018 3:19 am, edited 1 time in total.

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Posts: 4908
Founded: Oct 05, 2016

Postby Tinhampton » Fri Aug 10, 2018 7:27 am

Any Tinhamptonian army that tries to invade (the rest of) the UK - for whatever reason, perceived GCHQ overzealousness or otherwise - will probably be crushed within 20 miles of Tinhampton city centre, the Demilitarised Zone agreement instantly nullified, and the city itself taken over and de-devolved with scarce resistance of any description...
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Selena Quintilliana Perez
Posts: 33
Founded: Aug 09, 2018

Postby Selena Quintilliana Perez » Fri Aug 10, 2018 7:40 am

We do have armed forces but only for self defence, but we would "invade" the country with Tejano music from our best singers and try to take over the pop charts.

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The Russian Nations
Posts: 175
Founded: Jun 27, 2017
Psychotic Dictatorship

Postby The Russian Nations » Fri Aug 10, 2018 7:43 am

We would Send in NRF Undercover Cells to Cause Chaos,then An Armed Assault with Helicopters,and also an Amphibious Invasion with Hovercraft and Tanks.
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Posts: 3317
Founded: Oct 24, 2015
New York Times Democracy

Postby Eclius » Fri Aug 10, 2018 8:49 am

Province of Britannia was captured a really long time ago
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The Free Islands of Independence
Posts: 256
Founded: Oct 01, 2016
Iron Fist Consumerists

Postby The Free Islands of Independence » Fri Aug 10, 2018 9:46 am

We are half the world away from the British homeland. Amy invasion would have to be done with access to nearby countries, preferably Ireland or Iceland.
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Posts: 2782
Founded: Dec 08, 2014
Moralistic Democracy

Postby TURTLESHROOM II » Fri Aug 10, 2018 9:48 am

Our plan is a simple binary choice: lose or sea of glass.

We have tens of thousands more WMDs than the UK, and that is our only advantage. TurtleShroom is a landlocked country and even if a coast existed, the TS Navy is a brown-water entity and has no capacity for blue-water operations beyond heavily arming oil tankers and cargo ships.
Last edited by TURTLESHROOM II on Fri Aug 10, 2018 9:50 am, edited 1 time in total.
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