How's everyone doing?

[Risna]

Why are you feeling blue, Zeno?

Artwork is trite and doesn't add anything new to anything. Can't communicate in a way that makes sense 3/4 of the time. Body is wrong. Can't write worth a damn, mostly just dummy thoughts and dummy things. Just an overall stupid person with no real purpose other than being a good laugh for others.

Art (may I ask which kind or art you speak of?) is a very subjective thing. If you truly despise your art then you should try another kind which gives you more happiness. if you despise your drawings try another style. If worst comes to worst try another kind of art. Also when you say you can no communicate worth a damn, do you mean that you do no ennunciate your words correctly? Or that you do not say what you mean?/People dont understand what you say? Also with writing I am a writer, most of my "stories" are no more then two pages long i have like 20 unfinished works. So do not sweat it if you feel you are not performing. Also can you describe more about your "dummy thoughts"? Because most of my thoughts are dumb but I am not a worthless person. Oh and "being a good laugh for everyone else" Do you forget we all have our own shit to deal with too? We are drowning too much in our own angst to laugh at yours.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

Why are you feeling blue, Zeno?

Artwork is trite and doesn't add anything new to anything. Can't communicate in a way that makes sense 3/4 of the time. Body is wrong. Can't write worth a damn, mostly just dummy thoughts and dummy things. Just an overall stupid person with no real purpose other than being a good laugh for others.

Despite our differences, I do not think you're a stupid person with no real purpose. Quite the contrary. I'm sure yours is going to be an amazing journey. It's just that things aren't coming out the way you want them to.

Whatever I may say may not amount to much, but never think you're worthless. Perhaps you need to go out, get some inspiration from solitude. That sometimes works. Or engross yourself in the music you enjoy, and maybe there you will find inspiration.

[Zeth Rekia]

Zeno wants grandma back.

[New England and The Maritimes]

Zeno wants grandma back.

I know the feeling. It really sucks.

[Mosasauria]

Why are you feeling blue, Zeno?

Artwork is trite and doesn't add anything new to anything. Can't communicate in a way that makes sense 3/4 of the time. Body is wrong. Can't write worth a damn, mostly just dummy thoughts and dummy things. Just an overall stupid person with no real purpose other than being a good laugh for others.

Zeno.
You have many things I wish I had. Artistic talent. Creativity beyond the wildest imagination. From what I can tell, intelligence that is actually practical.
And from what I've read, your writing is good.

[Greater Cabinda]

Why are you feeling blue, Zeno?

Artwork is trite and doesn't add anything new to anything. Can't communicate in a way that makes sense 3/4 of the time. Body is wrong. Can't write worth a damn, mostly just dummy thoughts and dummy things. Just an overall stupid person with no real purpose other than being a good laugh for others.

Actually, I always liked your artwork.

I'm still using this as my wallpaper on my laptop.

And, although I've never seen your writing, I'm sure that it's perfectly good.

[Mosasauria]

Zeno wants grandma back.

My grandmother just died three weeks ago...

[New England and The Maritimes]

Zeno wants grandma back.

My grandmother just died three weeks ago...

3 years 6 months to the day.

[Risna]

Zeno wants grandma back.

i lost 3 of my grandparents so far, I understand the loss of a family member. You can not wish them back, all you can do is live your life in their honor. They are watching you, be courteous, be wise, grow strong, make them proud. That is the greatest thing you can do for them.

[Greater Cabinda]

Zeno wants grandma back.

My grandmother just died three weeks ago...

My grandmother died 3 years ago. She and I were fairly close.

I would say that I understand, but such statements are cliche and only seem to make me look like an insensitive jerk. All I can say is that I have felt hopeless before, and that one statement has always kept me going:

"Things get better."

[Risna]

Rather sad at the moment.

Is there anything you wish to talk about? Any burden we can take off you?

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

Zeno wants grandma back.

Sorry sweetie. It is hard when we lose someone we love like I'm sure you love your grandma.

[New England and The Maritimes]

Zeno wants grandma back.

i lost 3 of my grandparents so far, I understand the loss of a family member. You can not wish them back, all you can do is live your life in their honor. They are watching you, be courteous, be wise, grow strong, make them proud. That is the greatest thing you can do for them.

I wouldn't take it that far. What is left of them is memories, memories attached to things and memories in your mind. What you must do is find the good in their passing, and make sure their memory stays, so they are never truly gone. Letting death dominate your life is a mistake.

One suggestion I can make, which I myself am planning to do, is name your children after them, should you plan to have any. If you're close, it is a good way to honor their memory and to bring a new life to it.

[Hathradic States]

So, y'all, how're you doing?

I'm doing okay, but that's about it. You?

Totally excellent.

[Risna]

i lost 3 of my grandparents so far, I understand the loss of a family member. You can not wish them back, all you can do is live your life in their honor. They are watching you, be courteous, be wise, grow strong, make them proud. That is the greatest thing you can do for them.

I wouldn't take it that far. What is left of them is memories, memories attached to things and memories in your mind. What you must do is find the good in their passing, and make sure their memory stays, so they are never truly gone. Letting death dominate your life is a mistake.

One suggestion I can make, which I myself am planning to do, is name your children after them, should you plan to have any. If you're close, it is a good way to honor their memory and to bring a new life to it.

I think we can best combine our approaches. When you say "do not forget" one who is mourning should not hold onto the pain but accept their death. Do not let death overwhelm you but let it pass through you and make you stronger. Only a fool walks into the future backwards!

[Zeth Rekia]

Art (may I ask which kind or art you speak of?) is a very subjective thing. If you truly despise your art then you should try another kind which gives you more happiness. If you despise your drawings try another style. If worst comes to worst try another kind of art.

Zeno's crap. Zeno tried that. Ever Since grandma died Zeno's been obsessed with death ever since. Think about it constantly and Zeno hates it.

Also when you say you can no communicate worth a damn, do you mean that you do no ennunciate your words correctly? Or that you do not say what you mean?/People don't understand what you say?

Zeno clutters. Too soft spoken and such. Don't even know what Zeno's tying to say half the time.

Also can you describe more about your "dummy thoughts"? Because most of my thoughts are dumb but I am not a worthless person.

Stupid shit one should keep to themselves. That's mostly what it is.

Oh and "being a good laugh for everyone else" Do you forget we all have our own shit to deal with too? We are drowning too much in our own angst to laugh at yours.

Sorry...

My grandmother just died three weeks ago...

Zeno's died ten years ago. Sudden death right in front of Zeno. Have nightmares about it quite frequently still.

[New England and The Maritimes]

My grandmother just died three weeks ago...

Zeno's died ten years ago. Sudden death right in front of Zeno. Have nightmares about it quite frequently still.

That's rough... My grandmother's death was probably the worst thing that's happened to me, but she died slow, of lung cancer that went undetected for a full year despite frequent hospital visits about pains in her chest. Not one test, since her husband and his doctor simply told her she was crazy and a hypochondriac, and then demanded she stop wasting their time and told her to take Xanax.

[Nightkill the Emperor]

Rather sad at the moment.

It's ok, the decision will come soon.

Hopefully.

[Soviet Haaregrad]

Why are you feeling blue, Zeno?

Artwork is trite and doesn't add anything new to anything. Can't communicate in a way that makes sense 3/4 of the time. Body is wrong. Can't write worth a damn, mostly just dummy thoughts and dummy things. Just an overall stupid person with no real purpose other than being a good laugh for others.

Perhaps you feel your art is trite, the rest of us are overwhelmed by your talent. It could just be familiarity, it's too close to you for you to appreciate it.
You communicate fine, it's other people's failure to read what you say properly.
Bodies are fixable, and it sounds like you've started on that goal.

You're a pretty awsome person, who makes others laugh, but you're worth more than just that. I wouldn't say it if I didn't believe it, and you know that because I don't often try to back-pat people.

Unrelated, I had a first, some customer called to apologize for being rude.

[Zeth Rekia]

That's rough... My grandmother's death was probably the worst thing that's happened to me, but she died slow, of lung cancer that went undetected for a full year despite frequent hospital visits about pains in her chest. Not one test, since her husband and his doctor simply told her she was crazy and a hypochondriac, and then demanded she stop wasting their time and told her to take Xanax.

Wow, they're assholes.

[New England and The Maritimes]

That's rough... My grandmother's death was probably the worst thing that's happened to me, but she died slow, of lung cancer that went undetected for a full year despite frequent hospital visits about pains in her chest. Not one test, since her husband and his doctor simply told her she was crazy and a hypochondriac, and then demanded she stop wasting their time and told her to take Xanax.

Wow, they're assholes.

It's how American Medicine treats women. My mother had ovarian cancer, cervical cancer and an endomitrial tumor go undiagnosed for over a year as well, with the same basic response, "Fuck off, you're just depressed." She dropped 115 pounds in a year while doing nothing but sitting around eating McDonald's, and not one doctor batted an eyelash. Finally she found a female doctor and had a full on hysterectomy, since that was the only thing that could be done at that point, and barely made it through alive. These two experiences have left me pretty cynical with regards to the health industry.

[Risna]

Art (may I ask which kind or art you speak of?) is a very subjective thing. If you truly despise your art then you should try another kind which gives you more happiness. If you despise your drawings try another style. If worst comes to worst try another kind of art.

Zeno's crap. Zeno tried that. Ever Since grandma died Zeno's been obsessed with death ever since. Think about it constantly and Zeno hates it.

Also when you say you can no communicate worth a damn, do you mean that you do no ennunciate your words correctly? Or that you do not say what you mean?/People don't understand what you say?

Zeno clutters. Too soft spoken and such. Don't even know what Zeno's tying to say half the time.

Also can you describe more about your "dummy thoughts"? Because most of my thoughts are dumb but I am not a worthless person.

Stupid shit one should keep to themselves. That's mostly what it is.

Oh and "being a good laugh for everyone else" Do you forget we all have our own shit to deal with too? We are drowning too much in our own angst to laugh at yours.

Sorry...

My grandmother just died three weeks ago...

Zeno's died ten years ago. Sudden death right in front of Zeno. Have nightmares about it quite frequently still.

First off about your art, is not your art but your pain that is causing you to feel this way. You obviously started doing your art because you liked it. You would not have made it in the first place if you hated it. The Death of your grandmother is what causes these emotions. You need to deal with that roadblock in your life before you can move on.

Second about your speech. You speak soft spokenly and you feel you are not speaking coherintly, like you words have little worth. If it is simpily speech you can easily change that, it just takes will and noticing what you are saying. For a long time I had problems saying "like" every other word. I slowed down on what i spoke and then it went away. When I said "like" it was when my mind was thinking of what to say next. By slowing down my speech i was able to fill in those gaps in my brain. Also I have a tendency to not know how loud i am talking. I slowly start to elevate my volume untill I am practically yelling.

And finally can you speak more about your "death"? Was it emotional, spiritual death? What was it?

[Zeth Rekia]

It's how American Medicine treats women. My mother had ovarian cancer, cervical cancer and an endomitrial tumor go undiagnosed for over a year as well, with the same basic response, "Fuck off, you're just depressed." She dropped 115 pounds in a year while doing nothing but sitting around eating McDonald's, and not one doctor batted an eyelash. Finally she found a female doctor and had a full on hysterectomy, since that was the only thing that could be done at that point, and barely made it through alive. These two experiences have left me pretty cynical with regards to the health industry.

The doc's that turned her away should lose their jobs. How's she doing now?

Perhaps you feel your art is trite, the rest of us are overwhelmed by your talent. It could just be familiarity, it's too close to you for you to appreciate it.

Thanks. Probably so.

You communicate fine, it's other people's failure to read what you say properly.

Zeno's never sure. So, Zeno get's wonky about it at times.

Unrelated, I had a first, some customer called to apologize for being rude.

Wow. What for?

[New England and The Maritimes]

It's how American Medicine treats women. My mother had ovarian cancer, cervical cancer and an endomitrial tumor go undiagnosed for over a year as well, with the same basic response, "Fuck off, you're just depressed." She dropped 115 pounds in a year while doing nothing but sitting around eating McDonald's, and not one doctor batted an eyelash. Finally she found a female doctor and had a full on hysterectomy, since that was the only thing that could be done at that point, and barely made it through alive. These two experiences have left me pretty cynical with regards to the health industry.

The doc's that turned her away should lose their jobs. How's she doing now?

This was 13 years ago, she's reasonably fine now. Some hormonal problems but she's not dead. As for having their asses, I was a bit too young to get involved at the time, and in general the burden of proof is pretty solidly in the favor of these doctors. I've also had pretty terrible experiences with lawyers, so I'd say we were basically fucked either way.

[Grenartia]

Zeno wants grandma back.

Sorry sweetie. It is hard when we lose someone we love like I'm sure you love your grandma.

Exactly. I know somewhat how Zeno feels as well, because every time I see that pic at the top of my nation's page that links to Max's book trailer, the look on his face reminds me of my grandfather...

Why are you feeling blue, Zeno?

Artwork is trite and doesn't add anything new to anything. Can't communicate in a way that makes sense 3/4 of the time. Body is wrong. Can't write worth a damn, mostly just dummy thoughts and dummy things. Just an overall stupid person with no real purpose other than being a good laugh for others.

Zeno's artwork is beyond amazing. It is a gift to the world. Certainly better than the shit I've done...

Zeno makes sense to me 90% of the time....

Zeno will one day be able to get all of the procedures done that Zeno wants done. I just know it. You just can't give up. The minute Zeno gives up, that's when all of the ignorant assholes in this world win.

I don't find Zeno to be stupid at all. She can almost instantly comprehend things that I talk about that it would take me an hour to explain to my friend from my old school (who had a 4.0 and was the math teacher's daughter). Sure, Zeno may not know as many things as some people, but she has an incredible ability to comprehend.

And I've never found Zeno's personal misfortunes to be amusing.