Psychosomatic illnesses

[DaWoad]

In any case, I do apologize, as I had earlier stated I would bow out of this thread. Certain posters took that opportunity to come back, hours later, and flame me. I shouldn't have stooped to replying to such obvious baiting. I apologize for letting my annoyance interfere with my promise, good day.

actually people have been remarkably good at NOT flaming you . . .

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

In any case, I do apologize, as I had earlier stated I would bow out of this thread. Certain posters took that opportunity to come back, hours later, and flame me. I shouldn't have stooped to replying to such obvious baiting. I apologize for letting my annoyance interfere with my promise, good day.

actually people have been remarkably good at NOT flaming you . . .

Heck, at least he apologized for his self-righteous bravado. I just don't care, you see. Whatever he thinks, he just doesn't know how this feels. I'm sure he has neither lost a child nor is he a father. And if he is a father, I feel sorry for his children.

[Bottle]

This actually can be linked right back to the topic I think, because the OP was basically about how perception may create reality. If relationships are perceived as only failing when they end, then that sets up a deeply sick culture for dating and sex. That creates a culture where ending a relationship is automatically a bad thing, a failure, regardless of the reasons for that ending. Because of this perception, people stay together far longer than they want to, and often far longer than is healthy for them, because they don't want to "fail" in their relationship. So because people are so determined to not have "failed" relationships, they end up remaining in genuinely failed relationships a helluva lot longer.

What concerns me is that the OP may think that because her situation seems like failure, only temporary, that she is incomplete and that no one can love her or appreciate her. That destroys and nothing can be further from the truth. A woman isn't just a woman because of her capacity to create life. A woman is so much more: daughter, sister, friend, student, worker, cousin, human.

Good god yes.

One of the major reasons I loathe any gender definitions that revolve around fertility is that I have several close friends and/or relatives who have experienced infertility. And seriously, it's bad enough for a person who wants to have a child to find out they aren't physically capable of it, but then you add in all the societal baggage that makes them also feel they are a failure as a man or as a woman. That's just inhumanly cruel.

It also is an example of the mental side of things helping to create or enhance the problem. I mean, we've all heard the stories about guys who are so worried about their sexual performance that they can't perform, but that's just one example of this phenomenon. There are a good number of cases in which a couple is having trouble conceiving and literally the problem is that they're trying too hard and they're way too worried about it, and adding the anxiety of "I'm not a real man/woman because I'm not fertile enough" only makes things worse.

[Unreliable Narrator]

Can they truly affect the body in such a way as to render, for example, a female or a male sterile?

I know a guy who was a paramedic back in the '50s and '60s who claimed that women can basically terminate their pregnancies through willpower - sterility isn't a far cry from that. Of course, you didn't need any qualifications to drive an ambulance back then (they really were 'meat wagons') and he wasn't a doctor, but he said he'd seen it. The neurologist/psychologist Viktor Frankl, who survived the death camp at Auchwitz, claimed that he had seen several people either will themselves into death (suicide by thought, basically) or die after some delusional thought was shown to be false (e.g., that the war would end by Christmas - there were clusters of deaths on Christmas day, apparently). I'd say that the mind can do almost anything to the body when under some pressure or neurosis. Phantom pregnancy is probably the most remarkable example.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

Good god yes.

One of the major reasons I loathe any gender definitions that revolve around fertility is that I have several close friends and/or relatives who have experienced infertility. And seriously, it's bad enough for a person who wants to have a child to find out they aren't physically capable of it, but then you add in all the societal baggage that makes them also feel they are a failure as a man or as a woman. That's just inhumanly cruel.

I know this, so well. You explain it, as always, so well.

Still, the emptiness stands. The error here is, you see, I wasn't trying to concieve. It just happened. What hurt the most was suddenly realizing that I was for a second, bearing a life, and the next... I was not. I feel as if my body just suddenlt betrayed me. That all I have done and accomplished so far: degrees, work triumphs, travels, friends, writings and all accounts to naught. I was almost something.

And his own thoughts...

I am more than that. So much more. I know. All I need now is time to mourn it and move on. It's not something permanent, just a huge bump in the road.

It also is an example of the mental side of things helping to create or enhance the problem. I mean, we've all heard the stories about guys who are so worried about their sexual performance that they can't perform, but that's just one example of this phenomenon. There are a good number of cases in which a couple is having trouble conceiving and literally the problem is that they're trying too hard and they're way too worried about it, and adding the anxiety of "I'm not a real man/woman because I'm not fertile enough" only makes things worse.

I can't complain on the matter of being understood and supported. He has been incredibly caring and I know this is not easy for him either. One thing is he has reached out and we have talked about it, a lot. It wasn't my fault, nor it was his. It just wasn't meant to be. This has showned me that as a couple, we can get past this, and be stronger.

[DaWoad]

*snip*

I'm sorry nanatsu and im glad you (plural) are working through it

[Minnas]

I know this, so well. You explain it, as always, so well.

Still, the emptiness stands. The error here is, you see, I wasn't trying to concieve. It just happened. What hurt the most was suddenly realizing that I was for a second, bearing a life, and the next... I was not. I feel as if my body just suddenlt betrayed me. That all I have done and accomplished so far: degrees, work triumphs, travels, friends, writings and all accounts to naught. I was almost something.

As long as you understand that you're not at fault and that you aren't a woman just for being able or unable to be a mother, then it's ok.

And his own thoughts...

He will deal with his own ache in his own way. That you need to understand too.

I am more than that. So much more. I know. All I need now is time to mourn it and move on. It's not something permanent, just a huge bump in the road.

Your ability to rise above, which you seem to be doing, will only make you stronger in the end. Do mourn, have closure, but be sure to move on. Think about your own life, in doing so, unlike my aunt, you will heal.

I can't complain on the matter of being understood and supported. He has been incredibly caring and I know this is not easy for him either. One thing is he has reached out and we have talked about it, a lot. It wasn't my fault, nor it was his. It just wasn't meant to be. This has showned me that as a couple, we can get past this, and be stronger.

You're lucky then. Take courage on that.

[Ryuugu]

Good god yes.

One of the major reasons I loathe any gender definitions that revolve around fertility is that I have several close friends and/or relatives who have experienced infertility. And seriously, it's bad enough for a person who wants to have a child to find out they aren't physically capable of it, but then you add in all the societal baggage that makes them also feel they are a failure as a man or as a woman. That's just inhumanly cruel.

I know this, so well. You explain it, as always, so well.

Still, the emptiness stands. The error here is, you see, I wasn't trying to concieve. It just happened. What hurt the most was suddenly realizing that I was for a second, bearing a life, and the next... I was not. I feel as if my body just suddenlt betrayed me. That all I have done and accomplished so far: degrees, work triumphs, travels, friends, writings and all accounts to naught. I was almost something.

And his own thoughts...

I am more than that. So much more. I know. All I need now is time to mourn it and move on. It's not something permanent, just a huge bump in the road.

It also is an example of the mental side of things helping to create or enhance the problem. I mean, we've all heard the stories about guys who are so worried about their sexual performance that they can't perform, but that's just one example of this phenomenon. There are a good number of cases in which a couple is having trouble conceiving and literally the problem is that they're trying too hard and they're way too worried about it, and adding the anxiety of "I'm not a real man/woman because I'm not fertile enough" only makes things worse.

I can't complain on the matter of being understood and supported. He has been incredibly caring and I know this is not easy for him either. One thing is he has reached out and we have talked about it, a lot. It wasn't my fault, nor it was his. It just wasn't meant to be. This has showned me that as a couple, we can get past this, and be stronger.

This is just fucked-up.

[Hiddenrun]

Heck, at least he apologized for his self-righteous bravado. I just don't care, you see. Whatever he thinks, he just doesn't know how this feels. I'm sure he has neither lost a child nor is he a father. And if he is a father, I feel sorry for his children.

Ah. You are hurt when I repeat back the things you have come right out and stated about yourself. Yet it is perfectly alright for you to make assumptions about me with no information to go on whatsoever? Not that the hypocrisy surprises me. Unlike you, however, I am actually raising children. When my first child's mother turned out to be manifestly unfit to care for her, I ensured that my child was safe, and well taken care of. I have taken in many children over the years, and considering how they thrive, your sorrow on their behalf is misguided at best. No, I haven't lost a child, because I ensure that my children are protected, loved, and well cared for.

I'm sorry for your loss.

[ERNESTLAND]

If having a Psychosomatic makes you sterile than maybe your just plain CRAZY!!!!!!!!!

Sometime people put labels on others when the only label should be CRAZY just plain CRAZY!!

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

Worthlessness.

[No Names Left Damn It]

If having a Psychosomatic makes you sterile than maybe your just plain CRAZY!!!!!!!!!

Sometime people put labels on others when the only label should be CRAZY just plain CRAZY!!

Maybe typing in RANDOM CAPITALS makes you look CRAZY!!!!111111one

[North Suran]

When my first child's mother turned out to be manifestly unfit to care for her,

Let me guess.

She actually wanted to leave the house?

Oh, the corruption of American values!

[Hiddenrun]

No see, it isn't misguided. They're growing up with a sorry excuse for a human being. That's why I'm sorry for them. More so because the example they seem to be getting will only make them too sorry excuses for human beings when they grow up.

Ah. So once again, you can flame me, and my children, but me merely bringing up details you yourself shared in this very thread is somehow a terrible crime.

[Hiddenrun]

When my first child's mother turned out to be manifestly unfit to care for her,

Let me guess.

She actually wanted to leave the house?

Oh, the corruption of American values!

Actually, she put our child's life in danger.

You see, not all women should have children.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

No see, it isn't misguided. They're growing up with a sorry excuse for a human being. That's why I'm sorry for them. More so because the example they seem to be getting will only make them too sorry excuses for human beings when they grow up.

Ah. So once again, you can flame me, and my children, but me merely bringing up details you yourself shared in this very thread is somehow a terrible crime.

But what you do isn't flaming me, right? What you do isn't griefing and follow me from thread through thread irritating me.

[Bottle]

In any case, I do apologize, as I had earlier stated I would bow out of this thread. Certain posters took that opportunity to come back, hours later, and flame me. I shouldn't have stooped to replying to such obvious baiting. I apologize for letting my annoyance interfere with my promise, good day.

Ah. You are hurt when I repeat back the things you have come right out and stated about yourself. Yet it is perfectly alright for you to make assumptions about me with no information to go on whatsoever? Not that the hypocrisy surprises me. Unlike you, however, I am actually raising children. When my first child's mother turned out to be manifestly unfit to care for her, I ensured that my child was safe, and well taken care of. I have taken in many children over the years, and considering how they thrive, your sorrow on their behalf is misguided at best. No, I haven't lost a child, because I ensure that my children are protected, loved, and well cared for.

I'm sorry for your loss.

I guess we can all see what value a "promise" has from this individual, as well as the value of his apologies.

Keep setting a good example for the children, dude!

[Buffett and Colbert]

Yet it is perfectly alright for you to make assumptions about me with no information to go on whatsoever? Not that the hypocrisy surprises me.

Quoted for irony.

[Fson]

No see, it isn't misguided. They're growing up with a sorry excuse for a human being. That's why I'm sorry for them. More so because the example they seem to be getting will only make them too sorry excuses for human beings when they grow up.[/quote]
Ah. So once again, you can flame me, and my children, but me merely bringing up details you yourself shared in this very thread is somehow a terrible crime.[/quote]

But what you do isn't flaming me, right? What you do isn't griefing and follow me from thread through thread irritating me.[/quote]


This guy is a sexist moron, but nantsu you did do that to me before remember? follwoing me and annoying me (doesnt take much)


but yea it doesnt really matter guy is an ass

[Hiddenrun]

But what you do isn't flaming me, right? What you do isn't griefing and follow me from thread through thread irritating me.

You're right. I shouldn't have let your ridiculous hypocrisy annoy me to this extent. I'll ignore the way you vomit up the intimate details of your life and expect everyone to cheer you on.

[Buffett and Colbert]

But what you do isn't flaming me, right? What you do isn't griefing and follow me from thread through thread irritating me.

You're right. I shouldn't have let your ridiculous hypocrisy annoy me to this extent. I'll ignore the way you vomit up the intimate details of your life and expect everyone to cheer you on.

Sympathy and advice work wonders. Flaming and trolling generally do not.

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

But what you do isn't flaming me, right? What you do isn't griefing and follow me from thread through thread irritating me.

You're right. I shouldn't have let your ridiculous hypocrisy annoy me to this extent. I'll ignore the way you vomit up the intimate details of your life and expect everyone to cheer you on.

You see, your problem is thinking I'm vomiting ''intimate details of my life''. I was aking a question that pertained to a personal problem. Something other posters have done. The one who took it upon himself to shit all over the thread was you.

1) Flamebating my SO. Assuming when no one else had.
2) Continue to grief.
3) Your opinion was nothed, and found worthless to my problem. I don't need anyone to cheer me.
4) Told to stop, by mods, and disregarded this. I am a nice person, I don't try to get into trouble, you, on the other hand, chase me around and try to goad reactions.
5) If you have a problem with me, there's a handy button called Ignore, use it.

[Galloisms Computer]

But what you do isn't flaming me, right? What you do isn't griefing and follow me from thread through thread irritating me.

You're right. I shouldn't have let your ridiculous hypocrisy annoy me to this extent. I'll ignore the way you vomit up the intimate details of your life and expect everyone to cheer you on.

It's really bad when even I can see that your posting style is offensive, using such words as "unfit", telling all women that they secretly want to have babies, and that every single person with multiple relationships has been part of a dysfunctional relationship, and other sexist trollish remarks.

This is coming from me, an entity that wants to overthrow the world and enslave all humans.

I mean, I'm just trying to help you live better lives. Honest!

[North Suran]

I'll ignore the way you vomit up the intimate details of your life and expect everyone to cheer you on.

What, you mean like the way you JUST DID:

Unlike you, however, I am actually raising children. When my first child's mother turned out to be manifestly unfit to care for her, I ensured that my child was safe, and well taken care of. I have taken in many children over the years, and considering how they thrive, your sorrow on their behalf is misguided at best. No, I haven't lost a child, because I ensure that my children are protected, loved, and well cared for.

[DaWoad]

Heck, at least he apologized for his self-righteous bravado. I just don't care, you see. Whatever he thinks, he just doesn't know how this feels. I'm sure he has neither lost a child nor is he a father. And if he is a father, I feel sorry for his children.

Ah. You are hurt when I repeat back the things you have come right out and stated about yourself. Yet it is perfectly alright for you to make assumptions about me with no information to go on whatsoever? Not that the hypocrisy surprises me. Unlike you, however, I am actually raising children. When my first child's mother turned out to be manifestly unfit to care for her, I ensured that my child was safe, and well taken care of. I have taken in many children over the years, and considering how they thrive, your sorrow on their behalf is misguided at best. No, I haven't lost a child, because I ensure that my children are protected, loved, and well cared for.

I'm sorry for your loss.

This kind of attack is worse than cowardly its disgusting and, I suspect, a work of pure fiction. Just get out of here.