Awesome/Funny NS quotes (not your own quotes, please)

[Aeken]

I could always have the mass murderer taken away...

"Hey, Interpol? Thafoo calling. How's the weather over there? Good, good... So hey, how's Nancy? Oh, that's great to hear. Listen, there's a bit of a problem here in Overland Park. You know that serial killer guy, killed some children and their families in Romania, Britain, Germany, France, you know... yeah, he sort of moved in down the street. Mind you, he's actually a really sweet guy... except for the kill-y part. Be hosted a block party, it was really great... yeah, it's the one I sent you those barbecue leftovers from... yeah, he sort of armed the bouncy castle with plastic explosive. That was the third clue I had that it was him, y'know? I mean, after the part where he owns a compound with skulls displayed on the walls and whenever children would sort of disappear near it there would always seem to be more skulls... Anyway, what I'm saying is, he's not a nice guy. I mean, he's really sweet, he participates in the Homeowner Association meetings, he's a big part of the community... but he's also killing a bunch of people. So if you could take care of him, that would be greeeeat. Also, hey, come over for a beer some time! Weather's great, we could reminisce about college... okay, take care now, bye bye..."

Simple as that.

[Kouralia]

burrito-mobie is the only militry ground vehicle in el burrito, it is burrito.

That's a wrap, guys.

[Risottia]

Well, having sex for enjoyment and the killing off the baby is even more inhumane. Utterly preposterous.

(snip)...having sex so vigorously or heedlessly or whateverly that you kill a baby in the process would indeed be inhumane. it would probably be wise to keep the baby in another room while you go at it.

[Lipnitia]

"The balance of gaining and losing,
We show now over years,
In it there is nothing to hide,
In it there is nothing to fear.

How then from the bottom of the mirror,
On the threshold of every day,
First disgust greets you,
Then his brother, fear.'

- Jan Belinov, Lipnitian philosophist.

[Todlichebujoku]

"The balance of gaining and losing,
We show now over years,
In it there is nothing to hide,
In it there is nothing to fear.

How then from the bottom of the mirror,
On the threshold of every day,
First disgust greets you,
Then his brother, fear.'

- Jan Belinov, Lipnitian philosophist.

A word of advice:

DON'T SELF-PROMOTE.

[Wisconsin9]

"The balance of gaining and losing,
We show now over years,
In it there is nothing to hide,
In it there is nothing to fear.

How then from the bottom of the mirror,
On the threshold of every day,
First disgust greets you,
Then his brother, fear.'

- Jan Belinov, Lipnitian philosophist.

This belongs in Quotes of People in Your Nation MK.III.

[Todlichebujoku]

This belongs in Quotes of People in Your Nation MK.III.

The original post was from there.

[Wisconsin9]

This belongs in Quotes of People in Your Nation MK.III.

The original post was from there.

My bad.

[Grenartia]

A word of advice:

DON'T SELF-PROMOTE.

Its not even that awesome or funny. Just shitty.

[Risottia]

Image
I think we've gotten our answer.

Lovely spotting skills.

[Genivaria]

([img=http://i.imgur.com/hdNY7cE.png]Image[/img])

I think we've gotten our answer.

Lovely spotting skills.

The image is messed up, had to go to the pot. Funny though.

[Vareiln]

Context first:

If you are against something you have opinions about it,therefore, sense Athiesm is against religion they have religous views which makes them a religion, which makes them a faith. Therefore Atheism is a faith.

So... if a capitalist is against communism, he has communistic views which makes him a communist? Because that's basically what you're saying

Hey, since Nova is a Christian, which is against atheism, then he's sort of (in the long sense) an atheist!

One of us!
One of us!

[Nightkill the Emperor]

Are you telling me that Washington wanted to be the very best, like none ever was?

To kill Brits was his real test.
To free them was his cause.
:3

[Nightkill the Emperor]

http://blog.al.com/breaking/2013/12/athens_man_convicted_of_rape_r.html
http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nati ... n/4180963/

Horrific event, but not really a surprise. Alabama has historically been known as being an unstable and backwards area of the world, with pathetic law enforcement and a strong sexist society. To be honest, this is quite prevalent in America. It's unfortunate that life in the country is not easy for women, and being European doesn't make you a smaller target for abuses like this.

I would personally recommend economic sanctions on America until they can punish their rapists. However, it'll take something shocking as a famous foreign woman being raped by Americans to get the government off its ass.

Honestly at this point I seriously have to ask what the hell she was doing in America in the first place. I mean it's not like she is the first person to be raped or worse out there. And don't get me wrong. I am not blaming the victim here. All I am saying is that maybe if people stopped living there the impact on their economy would put some extra leverage on their government to grow up and step out of the middle ages. As small as that chance may be.

Why do people keep going to America, again? It's not like there's much to see there. A few sports stars, a big mountain. Everything else is a mid-modern first to third world jumble of slums and several shiny buildings. Not to mention all the rape and gun violence.

But perhaps one day these countries will finally become civilised. What do you say, NSG?

You're clearly too full of hatred against Americans to see the REAL scandal here, so let me spell it out for you.

Criminal hires an attorney who is a childhood friend of the local judge. Judge gives his boyhood friend's client a slap on the wrist as punishment for a serious crime. Higher court overturns the sentence and remands it back to the judge. Judge spits in the face of the higher court and gives his boyhood friend's client a slightly different slap on the wrist.

The story here is NOT that America won't punish rape.

The story here is that a local judge has chosen to dispense with justice for the sake of a childhood friend and that the higher court can't bring him to heel.

ASB missed my point.

However, he was the only person to read the articles and research the case I had arbitrarily chosen to rebut me.

We're lacking that in NSG.

[Big Jim P]

Gravity has become a universal fact with quite a bit less understanding than evolution. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-25598051 We've just begun to know the true nature of gravity yet nobody claims, "There's no evidence".

Gravity does not exist. I believe in intelligent descent.

[Breadknife]

It's been a while since I've added anything here. But Farn caused me to chuckle most delightfully in a thread that is particularly soul-numbing¹, and predictably so.

They're certainly unpleasant and to be avoided, but evil? Is a tornado evil?

Tornadoes are divine retribution for trailer parks.

¹ The existence or non-existence of the 'soul' is neither implied nor suggested. Hot apple pies may be hot. Your karma may go down as well as up.

[Miopic]

Thinking about vegans makes me feel depressed in the same way I get depressed when I think of starving African children-Disserbia

[New Lyrane]

Atheism requires a lot of faith

And "bald" is a hair colour.

And "bald" is a hair colour.

Actually, you basically just inadvertently nullified your own argument. Bald is a hair color, the color white. That's the reason the bald eagle is named the bald eagle, and not the 'eagle with no hair on it's head'.

[Divair]

And "bald" is a hair colour.

Actually, you basically just inadvertently nullified your own argument. Bald is a hair color, the color white. That's the reason the bald eagle is named the bald eagle, and not the 'eagle with no hair on it's head'.

I don't see what's so awesome about a false claim.

[New Lyrane]

I don't see what's so awesome about a false claim.

"Bald == white hair" just strikes me as amusing.

[Thafoo]

THE MOD(WHAT DOES THE MOD SAY?)
by Ruridova


Flamer says 'bitch'
Bigot says 'hoe'
DoS goes 'I'm here'
And NSGer says 'no'
Baiter goes 'fag'
RPer says 'godmod'
and the troll says 'U mad bro?'
Spammers spam
And lurkers lurk
And the TETers cry 'first post!'
But there's one sound that no one knows....

What does the mod say?
Stickies, stickies, stick-stick-stick, stickies
Stick-stick, stick-stick-stick-stick, stickies
Stick-stick, stick-stick-stick-stick, stickies

What does the mod say?
Banham banham banhammer!
Ban ban ban ban ban banhammer!
Banham banham banham banhammer!

What does the mod say?
Flaming, flaming, flaming, warned
Flaming, flaming, flaming, warned
Flaming, flaming, flaming, warned

What does the mod say?
Looking through your posting history
Through your p-posting history
P-p-p-p-posting history

What does the mod say?

Colored name
Pointed tone
Killing spammers
Banning trolls
Arbitrating
In NSG
Suddenly you're not posting
Your flag is strange
Yet beautiful
Like an average NSGer in disguise
But if you meet
A friendly poster
How will you speak to that
Po-po-po-poster
Po-po-po-poster
Po-po-po-poster
Can you talk to that
Po-po-po-poster
Po-po-po-poster
Po-po-po-poster

What does the mod say?
Perma-perma-permabanned!
P-p-p-p-p-permabanned!
P-perma-p-p-permabanned!

What does the mod say?
You guys are threadjacking now
Get this back on topic now
You guys are all threadjacking now

What does the mod say?
DEAT, DEAT, DEAT, DEAT!
DEAT, DEAT, DEAT, DEAT!
DEAT, DEAT, DEAT, DEAT!

What does the mod say?
Troooooooooooooooooooollnaming
Graaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaavedigging

What does the mod say?

The secret of the mod
NationStates mystery
Somewhere in F7
We know you're hiding
What is your sound?
Will we ever know?
Or will it always be a mystery?
What do you say?
You're our guardian angels
Hiding in the forums
What is your sound? (R-r-redtext, r-r-r-r-redtext, r-r-red-redtext, r-r-redtext)
Will we ever know? (R-r-r-redtext)
I want to(R-redtext)
I want to
I want to know! (R-r-r-r-r-redtext)

[The Scientific States]

THE MOD(WHAT DOES THE MOD SAY?)
by Ruridova


Flamer says 'bitch'
Bigot says 'hoe'
DoS goes 'I'm here'
And NSGer says 'no'
Baiter goes 'fag'
RPer says 'godmod'
and the troll says 'U mad bro?'
Spammers spam
And lurkers lurk
And the TETers cry 'first post!'
But there's one sound that no one knows....

What does the mod say?
Stickies, stickies, stick-stick-stick, stickies
Stick-stick, stick-stick-stick-stick, stickies
Stick-stick, stick-stick-stick-stick, stickies

What does the mod say?
Banham banham banhammer!
Ban ban ban ban ban banhammer!
Banham banham banham banhammer!

What does the mod say?
Flaming, flaming, flaming, warned
Flaming, flaming, flaming, warned
Flaming, flaming, flaming, warned

What does the mod say?
Looking through your posting history
Through your p-posting history
P-p-p-p-posting history

What does the mod say?

Colored name
Pointed tone
Killing spammers
Banning trolls
Arbitrating
In NSG
Suddenly you're not posting
Your flag is strange
Yet beautiful
Like an average NSGer in disguise
But if you meet
A friendly poster
How will you speak to that
Po-po-po-poster
Po-po-po-poster
Po-po-po-poster
Can you talk to that
Po-po-po-poster
Po-po-po-poster
Po-po-po-poster

What does the mod say?
Perma-perma-permabanned!
P-p-p-p-p-permabanned!
P-perma-p-p-permabanned!

What does the mod say?
You guys are threadjacking now
Get this back on topic now
You guys are all threadjacking now

What does the mod say?
DEAT, DEAT, DEAT, DEAT!
DEAT, DEAT, DEAT, DEAT!
DEAT, DEAT, DEAT, DEAT!

What does the mod say?
Troooooooooooooooooooollnaming
Graaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaavedigging

What does the mod say?

The secret of the mod
NationStates mystery
Somewhere in F7
We know you're hiding
What is your sound?
Will we ever know?
Or will it always be a mystery?
What do you say?
You're our guardian angels
Hiding in the forums
What is your sound? (R-r-redtext, r-r-r-r-redtext, r-r-red-redtext, r-r-redtext)
Will we ever know? (R-r-r-redtext)
I want to(R-redtext)
I want to
I want to know! (R-r-r-r-r-redtext)

[Ayreonia]

THE MOD(WHAT DOES THE MOD SAY?)
by Ruridova


Flamer says 'bitch'
Bigot says 'hoe'
DoS goes 'I'm here'
And NSGer says 'no'
Baiter goes 'fag'
RPer says 'godmod'
and the troll says 'U mad bro?'
Spammers spam
And lurkers lurk
And the TETers cry 'first post!'
But there's one sound that no one knows....

What does the mod say?
Stickies, stickies, stick-stick-stick, stickies
Stick-stick, stick-stick-stick-stick, stickies
Stick-stick, stick-stick-stick-stick, stickies

What does the mod say?
Banham banham banhammer!
Ban ban ban ban ban banhammer!
Banham banham banham banhammer!

What does the mod say?
Flaming, flaming, flaming, warned
Flaming, flaming, flaming, warned
Flaming, flaming, flaming, warned

What does the mod say?
Looking through your posting history
Through your p-posting history
P-p-p-p-posting history

What does the mod say?

Colored name
Pointed tone
Killing spammers
Banning trolls
Arbitrating
In NSG
Suddenly you're not posting
Your flag is strange
Yet beautiful
Like an average NSGer in disguise
But if you meet
A friendly poster
How will you speak to that
Po-po-po-poster
Po-po-po-poster
Po-po-po-poster
Can you talk to that
Po-po-po-poster
Po-po-po-poster
Po-po-po-poster

What does the mod say?
Perma-perma-permabanned!
P-p-p-p-p-permabanned!
P-perma-p-p-permabanned!

What does the mod say?
You guys are threadjacking now
Get this back on topic now
You guys are all threadjacking now

What does the mod say?
DEAT, DEAT, DEAT, DEAT!
DEAT, DEAT, DEAT, DEAT!
DEAT, DEAT, DEAT, DEAT!

What does the mod say?
Troooooooooooooooooooollnaming
Graaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaavedigging

What does the mod say?

The secret of the mod
NationStates mystery
Somewhere in F7
We know you're hiding
What is your sound?
Will we ever know?
Or will it always be a mystery?
What do you say?
You're our guardian angels
Hiding in the forums
What is your sound? (R-r-redtext, r-r-r-r-redtext, r-r-red-redtext, r-r-redtext)
Will we ever know? (R-r-r-redtext)
I want to(R-redtext)
I want to
I want to know! (R-r-r-r-r-redtext)

That's the greatest NS song since "My Little Nations."

[Wisconsin9]

THE MOD(WHAT DOES THE MOD SAY?)
by Ruridova


Flamer says 'bitch'
Bigot says 'hoe'
DoS goes 'I'm here'
And NSGer says 'no'
Baiter goes 'fag'
RPer says 'godmod'
and the troll says 'U mad bro?'
Spammers spam
And lurkers lurk
And the TETers cry 'first post!'
But there's one sound that no one knows....

What does the mod say?
Stickies, stickies, stick-stick-stick, stickies
Stick-stick, stick-stick-stick-stick, stickies
Stick-stick, stick-stick-stick-stick, stickies

What does the mod say?
Banham banham banhammer!
Ban ban ban ban ban banhammer!
Banham banham banham banhammer!

What does the mod say?
Flaming, flaming, flaming, warned
Flaming, flaming, flaming, warned
Flaming, flaming, flaming, warned

What does the mod say?
Looking through your posting history
Through your p-posting history
P-p-p-p-posting history

What does the mod say?

Colored name
Pointed tone
Killing spammers
Banning trolls
Arbitrating
In NSG
Suddenly you're not posting
Your flag is strange
Yet beautiful
Like an average NSGer in disguise
But if you meet
A friendly poster
How will you speak to that
Po-po-po-poster
Po-po-po-poster
Po-po-po-poster
Can you talk to that
Po-po-po-poster
Po-po-po-poster
Po-po-po-poster

What does the mod say?
Perma-perma-permabanned!
P-p-p-p-p-permabanned!
P-perma-p-p-permabanned!

What does the mod say?
You guys are threadjacking now
Get this back on topic now
You guys are all threadjacking now

What does the mod say?
DEAT, DEAT, DEAT, DEAT!
DEAT, DEAT, DEAT, DEAT!
DEAT, DEAT, DEAT, DEAT!

What does the mod say?
Troooooooooooooooooooollnaming
Graaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaavedigging

What does the mod say?

The secret of the mod
NationStates mystery
Somewhere in F7
We know you're hiding
What is your sound?
Will we ever know?
Or will it always be a mystery?
What do you say?
You're our guardian angels
Hiding in the forums
What is your sound? (R-r-redtext, r-r-r-r-redtext, r-r-red-redtext, r-r-redtext)
Will we ever know? (R-r-r-redtext)
I want to(R-redtext)
I want to
I want to know! (R-r-r-r-r-redtext)

My God, we need to make this happen. Does anyone here know how to sing?

[Ruridova]

Divair is obviously drunk, which results in some very funny posts.

Starting on page 17:

Looking for their names in the online box
It's like a poison, I need to be detoxed
I wanted continuity
But it's an online community
It's a shame these are how things are online
But c'est la vie, people leave you behind

I may or may not have been drunk when I wrote this. And yes it is cringe.

They post to troll or to speak their mind without giving up their name. It's a different type of community come to think of it more akin to a large city and NSG is a small town type feeling.

yes. NSG is cancouver.

What's wrong?
I actually enjoy metal sometimes. Others, it is just a bit too much, but some is good.

you mean what's left. Or right. I can't remember joke

*Is lost*

why are you lost? Why not game of thonrs? Much better shuw.

You can't get the same thing out of an online community that you can from RL friends. That's just how it is. If you have to choose, go for RL friends. (And you might well have to, time is valuable) You'll be allot happier in the end.

yes. But onlin can into real

I actually haven't listened to that much 70's rock recently...

60's rocks are much better. Like the rolling rocks.

Congrats Div, you've found your natural talent. Start writing Blues.

I am kk bing

Is... is Div drunk?

drunk ojj life tofusy

Who's that?

its like bb king but less black and more white

This should be a great day.

Don't TG me.

yesok tofust nom no tg

Just for future reference, you're posting from phone right? A pain, those small buttons, aren't they?

yes but phone is baby

I wonder what a drunken Divar TG is like?

like fly's of butter and milk

Stockholm death metal or GTFO. Also Sonne Adam from Israel.

death metal is too much dead

lel you cannot into no school

lightsabrrs in flag. Good choice

How many of what drink did you have, Divvypoo?

many much of such and such

Well.... It can but... I wouldn't choose that as my strategy to be honest...

can be good. Depend on person. Very nervous if meet up though. But some people wanna meet.

Then why does it make me feel so alive?

you zombie

Get on Steam. Now.

xompooter is all the way over there thoghb

only nubs have no sabrrs

goddamn niibs

Can I use this in a poem?


I don't like thinking.

yesok

Shit in a bucket. I was hoping for some Drunk Div convos.

cry me river. Or lake. Or ocean.

Div, please tell us how many of thing you drank and what that thing was.

tears oflife. Whole bowl

Geographical proximity has been proven to be (on of) the best predictors of becoming good long lasting friends. People on Internet forums come from all over the world and though you may easily find like minded people that you'd like to hang out with those people will probably live very far from you and besides which people act very different IRL compared to the Internet and you won't at all get the same dynamic. There's no guarantee that you'll actually like each other in person. On the other hand, romantic couples that find each other on dating sites tend to last longer and be happier. So there's that.

worth risk imo. Love is love.

Div was drunk as crazy shush,
He drank a ton of way too much,
Many much of such and such,
And in the end he had to flush

i want royaltys if sell good

dey no nutin

baby don't hurt me don't hurt me more

wat is nub

they hurt me they hurt me more. rip me

Fox should have worn gloves today.

His paws hurt.

is ok that's what amputation for

Okie dokie loki

yes I am loki ♡

Fox don't want amputation.

but baby hurt you hurt you more

Loki, go home before you accidentally blow someone up

I don't blow someone sorry

You can blow me any day, baby.

rofuayinzation you cannot ssx me even when this is life

No, that's not..
What you sound like right now Image

your asking your hand out?

http://fc00.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2012/140/a/f/okie_dokie_loki_by_flaredragon497-d50grar.jpg

omg hug what do

Good luck (jealousy! ). The only person I'd like to ask for a date at the moment is taken.

lets cry together because crush no date. rip my heart

-lifts Loki Div up-

What have you done to Div?

Div does not speak like that.

I speak how I want foxy and ifmjjan.

No, no >

your hand is cry

This is life, though. You're obviously fabulous. Embrace it.

go sway tofusips

don't laugh at me I try hugging ok? ;(

Nah, I don't cry. Atleast not when sober. I just slowly die inside. You can cry if you want to though, I don't mind.

I cry so many ㅠ.ㅠㅠ.ㅠ

If you were gay then you'd be all over me like ugly upon an ape.

yes I am ugly bur still babies

-smack-

Fox wants you snap out of it.

-smack smack-

fox hwy so mad is only game

That's not laughing silly, that's happy

ok I make you happy is all love ♡

Divair, soon or later you would be not safe anymore!

I not safe for work. Nsfl. Rjp. NASA. NSA. Mma.

Okay. I give up.

-breaks IC-

What's up?

you give up too bass so dad

I just keep getting sigged. It must be a new trend or something.

the trend of love you bastard

Well, you got first the NSA with PRISM, and now you got also Tofu...

Lord Divair, nobody can help you anymore

is ok. Tofuist is die

Are players permitted to use redtext?

no only gold

Divair is drunk? Did he raid my wine stash?

I raided your toilet

That would be more like the Daily Mail.

daily fail goddamn yanks

Tofuists is immortal.

no no you dje.

I wonder what's happening in the AntiVerse right now?

death

I never die, ever.

you deaded

Yeah. You did raided my wine stash.

nono raided toilet like with raid poison

I did not deaded, Divair. You're delusional.

I am not the Nike

Grammar Nazi says use real words please

I am very real mr. Gasgasgasgas

Did you just have another drink?

..... No

Gorram tits

moobs?

yes soldis

Drunkard?

me? never

I think you're still drunk, Div.

noooo

Aeq, don't let your paranoia get the better of you.
I dunno...

you dunno but you acting like you dunno

wut?! ;~;

rip our friendships
love you

"What shall we do with a drunken sailor,
What shall we do with a drunken sailor,
What shall we do with a drunken sailor,
Early in the morning?"

give him tea

Just look at your recent posting. You're drunk.

you just jealous

Drunk love <3

no love because Aeken <3<3

No, I'm not. I rather like using punctuation, proper grammar, and capitals.

hater gonna hates like an owl

What?

you hate like owl

That makes literally no sense whatsoever.

owl
he doesn't get it someone post the gift quickly

So where are you from?

places
where did I come from where did I go
I am cotton joe

cotton joe... Div... Israel, that must be it! *Poirot mode*

no I'm not from there

Racist!

And that is "cotton-eyed Joe"

whatever joe

Makes sense.

That's ridiculous.

yes I am cents

To show you how drunk you were when you sober up. And also to put in the AQ thread as funny quotes because some of them are actually pretty funny.

so quote much funny please stop me oh god

I never thought I would see a drunk Div. *cries of joy*

sshhsh no tears onl dreams

You are currency?

No. It is not.

unfurtunately

FOR THE LOVE OF BASIC HUMAN DIGNITY PLEASE LOG OFF AND STOP POSTING.

(Image)

so rage

When will you be altered?

With that in it?! No thank you.

I will tell you right now no one hates you here. As a matter of fact, I don't know who this person is.

when they kill the penny

Oh, what a day that will be in history.

rip penny
lol jk fuck penny

Dat Cock Head.

Well done Mercedes-Benz.

help
I die
too funny

No more dying. I like to much Divair

like me? You crazy

Little seeds of romance blossoming in the savannah.

BlaatxGalla
shipped