Awesome/Funny NS quotes (not your own quotes, please)

[Risottia]

In a thread about a bloke threatening a waiter with a sword to get free tacos:

Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You refused me free tacos. Prepare to die.

[Stattr]

In a thread about a bloke threatening a waiter with a sword to get free tacos:

Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You refused me free tacos. Prepare to die.

[Dakran]

http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/india/Homosexuality-is-criminal-offence-Supreme-Court-rules/articleshow/27208873.cms
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-india-25329065

I'll start off with cunts.

(That's a bit unfair to cunts, because those are pretty cool as genital organs go.)

[Warped Aggression]

In a thread about a bloke threatening a waiter with a sword to get free tacos:

Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You refused me free tacos. Prepare to die.

Thats the greatest thing I've read in my life.

[Phocidaea]

In five years time, Miley Cyrus will be remembered as that chick who turned lesbians straight.

[Wisconsin9]

In this situation Christians should stand their ground and just let the Satanists have their unholy monument distasteful as it is.

A faith that has exorcised actual demons doesn't need to fear wannabe cultists.

Source for the bolded.

Here.

Ty for the assist bro.

[Soldati Senza Confini]

I got a M249 and a Javelin. Bring it.

I don't know why, but when I read that javelin sounded dirty.
Then I thought to my self "Stop playing with your Javelin, Private" which made it even dirtier.

...

I blame ... Obama for this.

[Saveyou Island]

Neither do I but meh.

Children these days. Those young whippershnappers and their ibooks and macphones.

[Aeken]

Lian! Darn high-tech toilets.

I wish I had a toilet like that.

"Hatakeyama-san, it is most depressing that I have to report that the toilet didn't play music!"
First World Problems, Japan Issue #43.

Stupid fancy asian Toilets. >_>

You all underestimate the importance of music on our toilets. Sometimes when we have to go number 2, there are sounds that go along with the sinning; can't be bothered with that. The music drowns it out. In hindsight, the seat was still warm and the sprinklers still worked but still - the music.

Maeda, you snooty little shit. We're not paying you to be sitting your bum off all day. Get in there and fix that @$%#@%#$^@^ toilet so I can hear music when I shit.

xoxo,
Operations Dept.

[The Republic of Lanos]

"So, what are you in for?"

"Six counts of rape."

"Damn. It true?"

"...Yeah."

...

"...What are you in here for?"

"Sold drugs."

"What kind?"

"Meth."

"Huh."

...

"Who's the new guy? What're you in for?"

"I tried to hold up a taco joint."

"...Did you make any money?"

"No, I did not get any tacos. And the cops took my sword."

"...I like this guy."

[Cannot think of a name]

..The main point is that if the two were to join in a literal merger of countries, Canada's vast untapped resources and swathes of land would be protected from foreign interference by the world's largest military...

But who will the World's Largest military be protecting the land & resources from? The Inuits? The Polar Bears? National Geographic Cameramen?

[Damanucus]

A post on a poor transportation bill in the Silly and/or Illegal Proposals Thread illicited this response:

Yeah, buses, well safe.
(Image)

[Sahrani DR]

stuff in my signature...

[Divair]

stuff in my signature...

Read the OP ffs.

DON'T JUST SAY "IN MY SIG".

[Sahrani DR]

stuff in my signature...

Read the OP ffs.

DON'T JUST SAY "IN MY SIG".

I didn't say "in my sig", i said in my signature.

[Divair]

Read the OP ffs.

I didn't say "in my sig", i said in my signature.

Same fucking thing.

[Estado Paulista]

Don't look at me. Someone had to say it about that topic.

I can already feel this thread will end in a shitstorm.

*shivers*

I...I feel honored...

[Len Hyet]

I feel like this belongs here

EDIT: For context

There was no context

Does anybody want to see a pic of the deactivated grenade that almost caused me to be cavity searched last year at school?

[Grenartia]

I feel like this belongs here

EDIT: For context

There was no context

Does anybody want to see a pic of the deactivated grenade that almost caused me to be cavity searched last year at school?

I honestly didn't expect anybody to find it good enough to AQ. The weird part is, its funny because its true.

[Natair]

All that can be possibly said has been said. Pack it up, people. We're done here.

This has done nothing to restore my faith in humanity, but it did give me a good laugh.

There IS a Gamer up above looking down on us!

My Hope level just increased. I should rest and meditate on what I've learned.

(If you get that reference you're good.)

[Lydenburg]

(That's a bit unfair to cunts, because those are pretty cool as genital organs go.)

Bloody Yanks - no real fucking sense of humour.

[Dakran]

Bloody Yanks - no real fucking sense of humour.

It could have been a joke as well.

And as an American, I resent that!

[Tel]

If there's a White Santa outside and a black one inside your house, that makes it complicated. The writer of the firestorm-starting article had that experience.

Separate But Equal Santa.

[Tel]

Bloody Yanks - no real fucking sense of humour.

You represent your country very well, nice and mature. Those barbaric Americans wouldn't know anything about maturity or being cordial, now would they?

[Nightkill the Emperor]

Bloody Yanks - no real fucking sense of humour.

You represent your country very well, nice and mature. Those barbaric Americans wouldn't know anything about maturity or being cordial, now would they?

Let's not do this here.