Your tombstone

by **Bottle** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 5:06 pm

In very small text, so one would have to step on the grave to read it:

Please don't stand there.

by **Ceannairceach** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 5:08 pm

If I decide to be buried instead of cremated...

"Here lies [Insert Name Here]. He lived his life to the lend. Please have sex on this grave to honor his memory."

by **New Korongo** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 5:10 pm

"KEEP OFF THE GRASS"

by **Bafuria** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 5:11 pm

Here lies Bafuria the Wise, whose blood pressure turned out to be higher than his IQ.

by **Thurask** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 5:12 pm

I'd probably spoil The Mousetrap.

by **Minoriteeburg** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 5:12 pm

My tombstone will read.

"Lunatic Goofballs was right."

by **New Korongo** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 5:14 pm

"Want to know something about the afterlife?
There isn't one"

by **Grainne Ni Malley** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 5:14 pm

While I want to come up with something clever, witty, poetic, or moving, I am going to go with reality here in consideration of the epic cost to engrave a tombstone. Of course I am not going to give any of my actual information, so just use your imagination.

First Name Last Name
Born on ___________ Died on ___________

If money weren't a consideration, I might want to add something like: Look out, there's a zombie behind you! or You just stepped in poop.

by **Spazmagoog** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 5:28 pm

Grainne Ni Malley wrote:While I want to come up with something clever, witty, poetic, or moving, I am going to go with reality here in consideration of the epic cost to engrave a tombstone.

Find a good-shaped rock, engrave it yourself, leave the date blank.

by **Rokartian States** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 6:00 pm

Sic it fatum hominis - Such is the fate of man.

Alternatively:

Hic est summa conatuum hominis - This is the result of mankind's efforts. Not entirely sure how grammatical that one is.

by **Israslovakahzerbajan** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 6:03 pm

"If you didn't put Saa Hajimaru You as my funeral march I'll haunt your sorry otaku ass!"

by **Frenequesta** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 6:03 pm

If I had to be buried, I would choose "(NAME HERE) buried here, 1990-(whenever I die). Go ahead and dig me up, I'm wasting valuable space!"

by **Xiscapia** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 6:05 pm

"HI BILLY MAYS HERE."

by **Maraque** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 6:09 pm

I want it to say "The person responsible for burying me didn't follow my instructions and put me six feet under instead of cremating me and throwing my ashes into the Atlantic... but I'm not complaining (obviously)."

by **Dypsomaniacs** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 6:10 pm

Here is what I put on my tombstone...

by **Farnhamia** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 6:15 pm

I'd like my marker to be a simple stone bench, large enough for two people, and inscription inviting passersby to rest a moment and perhaps think on me, who is no longer here, but still wishes them well. There is a rather large one at the Porta Ercolano in Pompeii.

I couldn't afford anything like that but something like the bench at Johnny Mercer's grave would be nice.

by **Vorograd** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 6:17 pm

"I'm actually alive down here. I got my own mini-bar and everything."

by **Voltronica** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 6:20 pm

Thurask wrote:I'd probably spoil The Mousetrap.

yes cause at least then you have nothing to worry about

by **Banlieue 47** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 6:21 pm

Got another... is that allowed? I may just have two! Or... three... Family Plots and everything in THREE DIFFERENT COUNTRIES... divide my corpse?

"Hi, no-one else can see this, just you - yes, YOU, don't be so damned surprised. Just trust me, okay? They're trying to put YOU next to me, yeah, the ones in black... RUN!"

Hopefully it may incite a full-scale psychotic brakedown at a funeral...

by **Jarodl** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 6:22 pm

" Come and join me down here, there's enoughs room for two."

by **Eugepae** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 6:23 pm

"If you pull my finger, you will hear a Euphonium."

by **Voltronica** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 6:30 pm

"Women will be groped by the rising dead."
or
"Your Next!"

by **Thanya** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 6:36 pm

There's three I prefer.

"Involved in a plot."

"I left because I got bored."

"Time expired."

by **The Plutonian Empire** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 6:45 pm

Thanya wrote:"Time expired."

Even better would be "Your free trial has expired.", followed by a witty "please subscribe to us" kind of remark.

by **Gun Manufacturers** » Fri Feb 18, 2011 6:53 pm

Galloism wrote:Well, I had originally planned to be compressed into a diamond, and have etched in tiny letters "here lies <name>, as hard in death as he was in life."

Then, explicit instructions would exist to gift it to someone, and for no one to inform that person what it is.

Eventually, they will get it appraised.

However, if I must have a tombstone, something guaranteed to irritate people for the rest of time would be appropriate.

"The president is a dick.

No, the current one."

Can go with that.

Just out of curiosity, are you Corellian?

Your tombstone

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