Coming out parties? O_o

[Innsmothe]

never met a lesbian who hasn't always known they were gay ffs who do you think brought all the action men?

I do not believe this for a second. It certainly does not apply to gay men, who are very often confused about the whole thing for years.

because shes gay?

Congratulations on missing the point by a mile. If you swing back and forth you're hardly actually gay now are you?

seems like a support thing and an excuse

I think it's like those people with overbearing nurturing instincts who treat gay people they meet like flipping cancer patients or political prisoners or something. "Gosh, that's so brave, I'm going to be supportive now!" It's like they're really eager for someone to be gay so they can go all fussy over them. Never mind if the "gay" person in question is probably just a confused kid…

I was quite openly gay at eight.

[Fartsniffage]

*Four Yorkshiremen references go here*

No one'll believe ya.


Somewhat on topic, I don't see the point in a coming out party for a child that young.

[Tokos]

I was quite openly gay at eight.

You mean you liked pink or something? Eight year olds don't want to fuck either boys or girls. This is not a German commune we really should know this by now.

[Innsmothe]

I was quite openly gay at eight.

You mean you liked pink or something? Eight year olds don't want to fuck either boys or girls. This is not a German commune we really should know this by now.

Nah, I hate pink.

I just kissed other boys and stuffs.
Pullling their shorts down during P.E ,to get a good look,was quite common for me.

[Lauchlin]

I don't remember when exactly I knew I liked girls, but it was well before I got to junior high. By the time I was 10, I was hanging out with girls and knew that I wanted to do something with them that got me all hot and bothered, even if I wasn't sure exactly how it worked.

I think this claim that ten year olds can't know whether or not they're gay is incredibly naive.

As for the "belief of not making it a big deal," who has this belief that you're talking about? Personally, I think it's nice to show kids who are coming out a little support, especially if the communities they live in are homophobic. They're going to have to deal with bigots telling them they're subhuman for most of their lives; it doesn't hurt to send them off with a little support and approval when they first publicly acknowledge they're gay.

[Laerod]

I was quite openly gay at eight. :eyebrow:

You mean you liked pink or something? Eight year olds don't want to fuck either boys or girls. This is not a German commune we really should know this by now.

They can fantasize though. Sex or intimacy being icky does not mean that someone doesn't find men or women attractive.

[Fartsniffage]

Pullling their shorts down during P.E ,to get a good look,was quite common for me.

Really? How many registers do you now have to sign on a weekly basis?

[Call to power]

You mean you liked pink or something? Eight year olds don't want to fuck either boys or girls. This is not a German commune we really should know this by now.

I certainly did who didn't get a rock on to the pink ranger?

regardless you have been presented with the evidence of people who know better than you so there we go the evidence speaks for itself

[Cosmopoles]

In the sense that it's something you really shouldn't take hugely seriously in itself, yes. The wannabe-spaceman is not likely to have an understanding of the requirements to be an astronaut, realistic job expectations, etc; the ten year old is not likely to have an understanding of what exactly "gay" means, how it relates to him, etc.

I really do not see why it is controversial to hold that statements like these from kids really shouldn't be given much weight in and of themselves, any more than "Daddy I'm going to marry Sophie when I grow up" would be.

The amount of weight given to the things that kids state should depend solely on what it is they are stating - it isn't a case of "everything a ten year old says they wants means that is all they will ever want, ever" or "nothing a ten year old says they wants should ever be considered something they actually want."

I don't see why a child stating their sexuality should be treated differently to a child saying they want to become a dancer or play football when they grow up. A good parent doesn't say "yeah, whatever" - they nurture and encourage their child to do what makes them happy, whether that is taking them ot dance lessons, buying them football boots or helping them come out as gay. Telling your child that their opinions are irrelevant because they might change in the future is a great way to end up with a bunch of unhappy, resentful offspring.

[The Norwegian Blue]

I was quite openly gay at eight.

You mean you liked pink or something? Eight year olds don't want to fuck either boys or girls. This is not a German commune we really should know this by now.

What does wanting to fuck someone have to do with anything? Are you actually under the impression that orientation has absolutely nothing to do with non-fucking-based desires? Have you literally never had feelings for a member of your preferred gender except "I want to fuck him/her?" Because when I was eight, I didn't think about having sex with boys, but I definitely thought about kissing boys and cuddling boys and being called pretty by boys and holding hands with boys. A couple of decades later, I still think about kissing boys and cuddling boys and being called pretty by boys and holding hands with boys as well as fucking boys, and I'm pretty damn sure that's a big part of my being straight.

[Innsmothe]

Pullling their shorts down during P.E ,to get a good look,was quite common for me.

Really? How many registers do you now have to sign on a weekly basis?

Heh.

I genuinely dislike being around children, it does make me uncomfortable. But I do it anyway.
A, for the money.
B, as a desensitisation method.

[Innsmothe]

You mean you liked pink or something? Eight year olds don't want to fuck either boys or girls. This is not a German commune we really should know this by now.

I certainly did who didn't get a rock on to the pink ranger?

regardless you have been presented with the evidence of people who know better than you so there we go the evidence speaks for itself

Technically all I can do is give an anecdote, so I don;t expect him to change his droll, ignorant and arrogant opinion.

[Tokos]

You mean you liked pink or something? Eight year olds don't want to fuck either boys or girls. This is not a German commune we really should know this by now.

What does wanting to fuck someone have to do with anything? Are you actually under the impression that orientation has absolutely nothing to do with non-fucking-based desires? Have you literally never had feelings for a member of your preferred gender except "I want to fuck him/her?" Because when I was eight, I didn't think about having sex with boys, but I definitely thought about kissing boys and cuddling boys and being called pretty by boys and holding hands with boys. A couple of decades later, I still think about kissing boys and cuddling boys and being called pretty by boys and holding hands with boys as well as fucking boys, and I'm pretty damn sure that's a big part of my being straight.

You misunderstand. It's called "sexuality" for a reason.

Plenty of straight men don't much care for the company of women, and it is normal for straight girls to like cuddling with other girls, this hardly makes them less straight. Sexuality is about sexual attraction, plain and simple.

[Laerod]

What does wanting to fuck someone have to do with anything? Are you actually under the impression that orientation has absolutely nothing to do with non-fucking-based desires? Have you literally never had feelings for a member of your preferred gender except "I want to fuck him/her?" Because when I was eight, I didn't think about having sex with boys, but I definitely thought about kissing boys and cuddling boys and being called pretty by boys and holding hands with boys. A couple of decades later, I still think about kissing boys and cuddling boys and being called pretty by boys and holding hands with boys as well as fucking boys, and I'm pretty damn sure that's a big part of my being straight.

You misunderstand. It's called "sexuality" for a reason.

Plenty of straight men don't much care for the company of women, and it is normal for straight girls to like cuddling with other girls, this hardly makes them less straight. Sexuality is about sexual attraction, plain and simple.

Yes, attraction. Not necessarily sex.

[Tokos]

Yes, sexual attraction is necessarily to do with sex. It's kind of in the name.

Being gay or straight is to do with which sex you get hard/wet from. I can't believe I have to spell this out.

[Galiria]

What does wanting to fuck someone have to do with anything? Are you actually under the impression that orientation has absolutely nothing to do with non-fucking-based desires? Have you literally never had feelings for a member of your preferred gender except "I want to fuck him/her?" Because when I was eight, I didn't think about having sex with boys, but I definitely thought about kissing boys and cuddling boys and being called pretty by boys and holding hands with boys. A couple of decades later, I still think about kissing boys and cuddling boys and being called pretty by boys and holding hands with boys as well as fucking boys, and I'm pretty damn sure that's a big part of my being straight.

You misunderstand. It's called "sexuality" for a reason.

Plenty of straight men don't much care for the company of women, and it is normal for straight girls to like cuddling with other girls, this hardly makes them less straight. Sexuality is about sexual attraction, plain and simple.

I for one, was completely attracted to boys by the age of 10, it wasn't until I was about 13 or so and had learnt about sex that the idea of fucking them actually occurred to me.

[Lauchlin]

Yes, sexual attraction is necessarily to do with sex. It's kind of in the name.

And sexuality is not necessarily expressed by penetrative intercourse, so no, kids don't need to desire actual fucking to be sexually attracted to someone.

[Tokos]

I for one, was completely attracted to boys by the age of 10, it wasn't until I was about 13 or so and had learnt about sex that the idea of fucking them actually occurred to me.

And that is why the terms "gay" and "straight" are meaningless for the pre-pubescent.

[Saint Clair Island]

I don't see why a child stating their sexuality should be treated differently to a child saying they want to become a dancer or play football when they grow up. A good parent doesn't say "yeah, whatever" - they nurture and encourage their child to do what makes them happy, whether that is taking them ot dance lessons, buying them football boots or helping them come out as gay.

Indeed -- in the "I wanna be a cosmonaut"* example above, get the little brat some books about astronomy and rocket science and whatnot. Cultivate their interest. If they're not interested once they learn about it, or their interests change, then meh. They won't be a cosmonaut. If they're still interested, someday your child may be the first man to set foot upon the sun. Who knows.

Same kind of thing with sexuality. If they want to have a party because they're gay or whatever, let them. If they decide they're not gay in a few years -- who cares?


Also, yeah, it's true I didn't really want to fuck anyone when I was 8, nor were any other thoughts of sexual identity on the table. On the other hand, I still don't want to fuck anyone. It sounds kind of unpleasant. <.< As for sexual identity... never saw that as important enough to work out really. I'm probably straight or bisexual or something. Really, who gives a shit?

* this word is universally superior to and should always replace such inferior constructions as "spaceman" and "astronaut"

[Innsmothe]

Yes, sexual attraction is necessarily to do with sex. It's kind of in the name.

Being gay or straight is to do with which sex you get hard/wet from. I can't believe I have to spell this out.

Then why do five year old boys in their innocence regularly kiss girls, but not guys? If you were correct then children wouldn't be so discriminate, and would kiss both sexes without complaint.

[Katganistan]

Yes, sexual attraction is necessarily to do with sex. It's kind of in the name.

Being gay or straight is to do with which sex you get hard/wet from. I can't believe I have to spell this out.

I'd suggest, perhaps, studying human sexuality before feeling qualified to expound on whether or not children have it and can express a preference.

[Panzerjaeger]

How the hell would you know you are gay at 9? I didn't even know I was straight by then in fact the thought had never crossed my mind.

[Galiria]

How the hell would you know you are gay at 9? I didn't even know I was straight by then in fact the thought had never crossed my mind.

Some children are hyper-sexual...

[Laerod]

Yes, sexual attraction is necessarily to do with sex. It's kind of in the name.

Being gay or straight is to do with which sex you get hard/wet from. I can't believe I have to spell this out.

Reeducate yourself. You can have intimacy issues, be disinclined to have sex, or just plain find it icky, and yet get a hard on and/or find a certain sex attractive.

You may be going under the false assumption that what's true for you is true for everyone and that your way of developing your sexuality is the only way it can happen.

[The Norwegian Blue]

What does wanting to fuck someone have to do with anything? Are you actually under the impression that orientation has absolutely nothing to do with non-fucking-based desires? Have you literally never had feelings for a member of your preferred gender except "I want to fuck him/her?" Because when I was eight, I didn't think about having sex with boys, but I definitely thought about kissing boys and cuddling boys and being called pretty by boys and holding hands with boys. A couple of decades later, I still think about kissing boys and cuddling boys and being called pretty by boys and holding hands with boys as well as fucking boys, and I'm pretty damn sure that's a big part of my being straight.

You misunderstand. It's called "sexuality" for a reason.

Plenty of straight men don't much care for the company of women, and it is normal for straight girls to like cuddling with other girls, this hardly makes them less straight. Sexuality is about sexual attraction, plain and simple.

I'm sorry, but that's utter nonsense. People do not marry members of their preferred gender(s) because they just want to fuck. They marry each other because they are in love, and they do not fall in love with people outside their preferred gender(s). To pretend that romantic feelings are not part of one's sexual orientation is complete bullshit.