Don't Burn That Koran, demand a Huge Ransom "or Else"!

[Neu Mitanni]

Here's my solution to the whole "International Burn a Koran Day" fiasco:

What is more important to muslims, that their holy book shouldn't be destroyed-disgraced, or their money?

Back in the era of Thomas Jefferson and the Barbary Pirates, the muslims wanted money in exchange for captured American sailors. Jefferson decided to strike the muslims militarily. Radical muslims already capture and kill American targets of opportunity, so I don't think we need to worry about the Saudi navy.

Let's ransom The Koran, or Else!

I like the way you think

I find myself uncharacteristically undecided on this issue

On the one hand, I am godDAMN sick and tired of being told we have to walk on eggshells any time some Moslem somewhere in the world MIGHT take "offense" at something or other we do, think or say. I really want to send a message to ALL OF ISLAM that they do NOT have a veto over what the civilized world does, that we are not going to be blackmailed by Islamic Rage Boy, that we are not bound by their bullsh*t law and evil ideology, that if they are "offended", TOO BAD, live with it, that if they refuse to act in a civilized manner they will be forced to do so, and that for every ONE of us they do violence to, we will blow away ONE HUNDRED of them.

On the other hand, I respect Gen. Petraeus, at least (certainly not the Kenyan Imam who's giving him orders). And yet, I don't think he should have inserted himself into the matter. Nor do I agree with his analysis.

So how about this alternative: make a video of the book, and digitally superimpose footage of a bonfire. That way, it's symbolically burned. And no sparks or pollution are produced due to a real bonfire! So even the local fire department is happy.

[Farnhamia]

I'm sure Islam's collective response will be a polite "Go fuck yourself".

And I would say that if they don't want to save their books when they could, then they are in part to blame if those books are burnt.

What a load of horse dick. "Hey guys, let's, like, blackmail Muslims. It's win win, either we get money out of it, or we get to burn the Qu'ran and blame it on them, because they didn't pay us!". Yeah, you got us, chief, we're all fooled.

But, Ifreaaaaaaaaaaaann, all the other countries are acting like barbarians! You never let me do anything! I hate you! You ruined my LIFE!*slam*

[Wilgrove]

I was listening to an interview of the Imam behind the "ground zero mosque", on the radio.

He was asked if Terry Jones had the right to burn the Koran, the hypocrite actually said that Jones ought to be considerate of others' sensibilities.

Source?

[Big Jim P]

While we're at it, let's carpet bomb the middle east with ham sandwiches.

I am convince that bacon will somehow lead us to world peace. Either that or beer.

Maybe we could make beer out of bacon?

[Georgism]

I like the way you think

I find myself uncharacteristically undecided on this issue

On the one hand, I am godDAMN sick and tired of being told we have to walk on eggshells any time some Moslem somewhere in the world MIGHT take "offense" at something or other we do, think or say. I really want to send a message to ALL OF ISLAM that they do NOT have a veto over what the civilized world does, that we are not going to be blackmailed by Islamic Rage Boy, that we are not bound by their bullsh*t law and evil ideology, that if they are "offended", TOO BAD, live with it, that if they refuse to act in a civilized manner they will be forced to do so, and that for every ONE of us they do violence to, we will blow away ONE HUNDRED of them.

On the other hand, I respect Gen. Petraeus, at least (certainly not the Kenyan Imam who's giving him orders). And yet, I don't think he should have inserted himself into the matter. Nor do I agree with his analysis.

So how about this alternative: make a video of the book, and digitally superimpose footage of a bonfire. That way, it's symbolically burned. And no sparks or pollution are produced due to a real bonfire! So even the local fire department is happy.

Comedy gold as always.

[Farnhamia]

I like the way you think

I find myself uncharacteristically undecided on this issue

On the one hand, I am godDAMN sick and tired of being told we have to walk on eggshells any time some Moslem somewhere in the world MIGHT take "offense" at something or other we do, think or say. I really want to send a message to ALL OF ISLAM that they do NOT have a veto over what the civilized world does, that we are not going to be blackmailed by Islamic Rage Boy, that we are not bound by their bullsh*t law and evil ideology, that if they are "offended", TOO BAD, live with it, that if they refuse to act in a civilized manner they will be forced to do so, and that for every ONE of us they do violence to, we will blow away ONE HUNDRED of them.

On the other hand, I respect Gen. Petraeus, at least (certainly not the Kenyan Imam who's giving him orders). And yet, I don't think he should have inserted himself into the matter. Nor do I agree with his analysis.

So how about this alternative: make a video of the book, and digitally superimpose footage of a bonfire. That way, it's symbolically burned. And no sparks or pollution are produced due to a real bonfire! So even the local fire department is happy.

Comedy gold as always.

Except NM's not trying to be funny, except in a snide way. Knowing he's perfectly serious sort of lessens the lulz value for me.

[Wilgrove]

While we're at it, let's carpet bomb the middle east with ham sandwiches.

I am convince that bacon will somehow lead us to world peace. Either that or beer.

Maybe we could make beer out of bacon?

How about Bacon flavored beer? BRILLIANT!

[MisanthropicPopulism]

I'm sure Islam's collective response will be a polite "Go fuck yourself".

And I would say that if they don't want to save their books when they could, then they are in part to blame if those books are burnt.

What a load of horse dick. "Hey guys, let's, like, blackmail Muslims. It's win win, either we get money out of it, or we get to burn the Qu'ran and blame it on them, because they didn't pay us!". Yeah, you got us, chief, we're all fooled.

But, Ifreaaaaaaaaaaaann, all the other countries are acting like barbarians! You never let me do anything! I hate you! You ruined my LIFE!*slam*

Hey, if I can't build a church in Saudi Arabia next to Mecca, then Muslims can't worship here. It's that simple.

While we're at it, let's carpet bomb the middle east with ham sandwiches.

I am convince that bacon will somehow lead us to world peace. Either that or beer.

Maybe we could make beer out of bacon?

How about Bacon flavored beer? BRILLIANT!

Speaking of bacon. Thinkgeek probably has all the weird bacon related products you could ever want.
Short of real bacon.

[Wilgrove]

You know, I have just one question to Terry Jones. You are willing to burn the Qur'an for whatever fucked up reason, that put citizens of the USA and our military personal in harms way of radical Muslims.

Why do you hate America/Freedom?

[Thevenin]

While we're at it, let's carpet bomb the middle east with ham sandwiches.

its always odd how far Americans have taken this, its like they have never seen a Muslim before or gotten drunk with one


I'm sorry my sarcasm was lost on you.

[Calenhardon]

I got it. We change the official spelling from "Muslim" to "Moslem" They hate that!

Also, Mohammed becomes Mahomet. And to further piss them off, we call them Mahometans. They REALLY don't like that one.

[Ifreann]

I'm sure Islam's collective response will be a polite "Go fuck yourself".

And I would say that if they don't want to save their books when they could, then they are in part to blame if those books are burnt.

What a load of horse dick. "Hey guys, let's, like, blackmail Muslims. It's win win, either we get money out of it, or we get to burn the Qu'ran and blame it on them, because they didn't pay us!". Yeah, you got us, chief, we're all fooled.

But, Ifreaaaaaaaaaaaann, all the other countries are acting like barbarians! You never let me do anything! I hate you! You ruined my LIFE!*slam*

You don't need a condom, she tells me. I'm on the pill, she tells me. FML.

[Neu Mitanni]

And btw: for all those who are so concerned about those poor pitiful persecuted Moslems and their precious sensitivities, WHERE THE F*** WERE YOU when the following incident took place:

http://edition.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/asiap ... es.burned/

Yes, that's right: OUR OWN MILITARY (approved, no doubt, by the Kenyan imam) BURNED BIBLES in that shithole Afghanistan, lest certain treacherous, ungrateful, primitive bastards whom we happen to be DEFENDING go berserk at the thought someone might actually READ them, or even worse, convert to Christianity

Oops, I forgot: nobody's afraid to offend CHRISTIANS, because we don't RIOT and KILL those who "offend" us!

[MisanthropicPopulism]

You know, I have just one question to Terry Jones. You are willing to burn the Qur'an for whatever fucked up reason, that put citizens of the USA and our military personal in harms way of radical Muslims.

Why do you hate America/Freedom?

He doesn't hate freedom. He loves America. That's why he is exercising his right of free expression to burn the holy book of another religion. Why do you all hate America? Why don't you go ask why Obama is putting our citizens in danger by supporting a the largest mosque ever conceived to be built right in the middle of ground zero with gun turrets to cut down non-believers?

[Novograd IV]

america =/= christians
so why does

Islam = ALL terrorists
and
ALL terrorists = Islam now?

OP... i present you with: 'The Look'

[Wilgrove]

And btw: for all those who are so concerned about those poor pitiful persecuted Moslems and their precious sensitivities, WHERE THE F*** WERE YOU when the following incident took place:

http://edition.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/asiap ... es.burned/

Yes, that's right: OUR OWN MILITARY (approved, no doubt, by the Kenyan imam) BURNED BIBLES in that shithole Afghanistan, lest certain treacherous, ungrateful, primitive bastards whom we happen to be DEFENDING go berserk at the thought someone might actually READ them, or even worse, convert to Christianity

Oops, I forgot: nobody's afraid to offend CHRISTIANS, because we don't RIOT and KILL those who "offend" us!

Ummm...from your own article.

The unsolicited Bibles sent by a church in the United States were confiscated about a year ago at Bagram Air Base in Afghanistan because military rules forbid troops of any religion from proselytizing while deployed there, Lt. Col. Mark Wright said.

Such religious outreach can endanger American troops and civilians in the devoutly Muslim nation, Wright said.

[Farnhamia]

I'm sure Islam's collective response will be a polite "Go fuck yourself".

And I would say that if they don't want to save their books when they could, then they are in part to blame if those books are burnt.

What a load of horse dick. "Hey guys, let's, like, blackmail Muslims. It's win win, either we get money out of it, or we get to burn the Qu'ran and blame it on them, because they didn't pay us!". Yeah, you got us, chief, we're all fooled.

But, Ifreaaaaaaaaaaaann, all the other countries are acting like barbarians! You never let me do anything! I hate you! You ruined my LIFE!*slam*

Hey, if I can't build a church in Saudi Arabia next to Mecca, then Muslims can't worship here. It's that simple.

While we're at it, let's carpet bomb the middle east with ham sandwiches.

I am convince that bacon will somehow lead us to world peace. Either that or beer.

Maybe we could make beer out of bacon?

How about Bacon flavored beer? BRILLIANT!

Speaking of bacon. Thinkgeek probably has all the weird bacon related products you could ever want.
Short of real bacon.

I'm surprised there's no poll, in true YGO style.

- Burn 'em!
- Make them pay!
- Make them pay & burn them anyway!
- Burn them anyway & then make them pay!
- Wait!
- What?
- Obama Sucks

[Big Jim P]

And btw: for all those who are so concerned about those poor pitiful persecuted Moslems and their precious sensitivities, WHERE THE F*** WERE YOU when the following incident took place:

http://edition.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/asiap ... es.burned/

Yes, that's right: OUR OWN MILITARY (approved, no doubt, by the Kenyan imam) BURNED BIBLES in that shithole Afghanistan, lest certain treacherous, ungrateful, primitive bastards whom we happen to be DEFENDING go berserk at the thought someone might actually READ them, or even worse, convert to Christianity

Oops, I forgot: nobody's afraid to offend CHRISTIANS, because we don't RIOT and KILL those who "offend" us!

Rest assured, there are plenty of people in the world that think Christians and Muslims BOTH need a good kick in the ass.

[Thevenin]

And btw: for all those who are so concerned about those poor pitiful persecuted Moslems and their precious sensitivities, WHERE THE F*** WERE YOU when the following incident took place:

http://edition.cnn.com/2009/WORLD/asiap ... es.burned/

Yes, that's right: OUR OWN MILITARY (approved, no doubt, by the Kenyan imam) BURNED BIBLES in that shithole Afghanistan, lest certain treacherous, ungrateful, primitive bastards whom we happen to be DEFENDING go berserk at the thought someone might actually READ them, or even worse, convert to Christianity

Oops, I forgot: nobody's afraid to offend CHRISTIANS, because we don't RIOT and KILL those who "offend" us!

Fred Phelps would love to do both of those, I'd imagine.

[Daemonicai]

OR they can all put on armor and equip themselves with weapons, then battle it out crusades style.
The muslims won I think, well at least that's how it goes in the movie Kingdom of Heaven.

What do you think the Gulf Wars were? They're the Last Crusades!

The USA was sad that it missed out in these wars so it invaded to relive the feeling. Except they went a bit too far right and landed in Iraq, not the Holy Land.

[Neu Mitanni]

You know, I have just one question to Terry Jones. You are willing to burn the Qur'an for whatever fucked up reason, that put citizens of the USA and our military personal in harms way of radical Muslims.

Why do you hate America/Freedom?

Wrong question.

The real question is, Why are we supposed to be intimidated by the threat of (so-called) radical Moslems attacking us, rather than warning THEM against doing so and holding THEM responsible for their crimes?

And better yet: Why aren't (so-called) radical MOSLEMS afraid of offending US?

[MisanthropicPopulism]

And better yet: Why aren't (so-called) radical MOSLEMS afraid of offending US?

I... you.. the... what..
Pajamas.

[Holy Paradise]

In my humble opinion, the moral and logical choice would be not to burn the religious books of the Muslim populace, but rather provide an example of true compassion, and have a donation drive to send supplies to people suffering from war in the Middle East.

[Wilgrove]

You know, I have just one question to Terry Jones. You are willing to burn the Qur'an for whatever fucked up reason, that put citizens of the USA and our military personal in harms way of radical Muslims.

Why do you hate America/Freedom?

Wrong question.

The real question is, Why are we supposed to be intimidated by the threat of (so-called) radical Moslems attacking us, rather than warning THEM against doing so and holding THEM responsible for their crimes?

And better yet: Why aren't (so-called) radical MOSLEMS afraid of offending US?

A better question is, why should we assume that Muslims should be afraid of us or bow down to us?

[Thevenin]

In my humble opinion, the moral and logical choice would be not to burn the religious books of the Muslim populace, but rather provide an example of true compassion, and have a donation drive to send supplies to people suffering from war in the Middle East.

that's not gonzo enough for us mericans, and I wouldn't get any satisfaction of my revenge fantasies.