"What are your pronouns?"

[Daarwyrth]

I have no problem with addressing someone the way they ask me to address them. If someone specifies they want to go by they/them, he/him or any other form of pronoun, I'll accept that and try my best to remember. It's like someone who is called Vanessa and says "oh, I go by Nessa". If we can accept that, namely that someone has a preferred nickname or preferred way of being addressed by their name, it should not be hard to address someone by their preferred pronouns. If you genuinely forget, that's fine, I think, just try to remember for the next time.

Like, it's entirely reasonable, right? If I'm called Robert, and I tell someone "oh, I go by Rob", then why shouldn't that person call me Rob? I specifically tell them. If I don't tell them, then they can refer to me however they want. Same with pronouns, if someone specifically says "I go by [insert pronoun]", then what's so tricky about sticking to that?

[Hukhalia]

Politics has never been about politeness; when people want you wiped off the face of the Earth - and a lot of these people do want to erase LGBT people, explicitly or implicitly - then they are hardly likely going to be polite about it.

That you speak of people wanting to wipe someone out while having the chinese Red Guards displayed as your flag is just...

violence is an entirely neutral thing, it's who wants to wield it that matters

[Kannap]

EVERYONE was using the singular they/them to describe a person of indeterminate gender long before the concept of non-binary entered the mainstream.

You're walking down the street and you see a backpack on the ground. What do you say? "Someone dropped their backpack. I'd like to return it to them but I don't have time to look for them, but hopefully they come back for it."

Fucking no one ever said "somebody dropped his or her backpack."

So reactionaries have no excuse. You were using it to begin with so if you refuse to use it now you're just being a dick.

Obligatory James Acaster

[Jungle Giants]

No problem with they/them, but I might just draw the line at Xhe, Zhe, and all the actual neologisms.

[Armeattla]

Lol k

Hey, the actual one keeps changing (ore are there just factions that each have their own spelling for that?), and this keeps me from being bitched at for forgetting a letter or a plus or whatever.

The different communities in different countries use different combinations.
In the USA and UK it's LGBTQIA+, in Canada it is LGBT2IA+, in Germany it's LSBTI+, etc.pp. Simply using LGBT+ will upset exactly no one.

No problem with they/them, but I might just draw the line at Xhe, Zhe, and all the actual neologisms.

I don't see how that costs you anything either. And not like most who use neopronouns are usually also fine with They/Them.

[Kandorith]

Meanwhile in the Netherlands: the pronoun for them sounds like the pronoun for "she".

Mostly I think pronouns are silly but I tend to use they and them most of the times because it's just easier and describes literally everyone. When in doubt: I use someone's name.

[Republic Of Ludwigsburg]

Why the fuck do people just want to be dicks to other people? How the fuck is it affecting you if someone calls themselves "they/them" or a neopronoun. Like seriously, how is it affecting you? If someone's just wants to be referred to something like "they/them" or "xe/xer" it literally isn't harmful to everyone. Jesus fucking christ people just need to be nice.

[The Imperium man]

Why the fuck do people just want to be dicks to other people? How the fuck is it affecting you if someone calls themselves "they/them" or a neopronoun. Like seriously, how is it affecting you? If someone's just wants to be referred to something like "they/them" or "xe/xer" it literally isn't harmful to everyone. Jesus fucking christ people just need to be nice.

We are already affected by the absurdity of Neopronoun because they realize Neopronoun as ridiculous. Centrist liberals , moderate conservatives and independent left wing centers. They are all important people who participated in the society as they are paying their taxes.

Incidentally , I've nothing against their sexuality for existence of the people like gay community.

[Ifreann]

Why the fuck do people just want to be dicks to other people? How the fuck is it affecting you if someone calls themselves "they/them" or a neopronoun. Like seriously, how is it affecting you? If someone's just wants to be referred to something like "they/them" or "xe/xer" it literally isn't harmful to everyone. Jesus fucking christ people just need to be nice.

We are already affected by the absurdity of Neopronoun because they realize Neopronoun as ridiculous. Centrist liberals , moderate conservatives and independent left wing centers. They are all important people who participated in the society as they are paying their taxes.

Incidentally , I've nothing against their sexuality for existence of the people like gay community.

How are you affected?

[Hyidai]

I don't understand neo-pronouns. But it's not that hard to use them, and it's not my problem.

[The Imperium man]

We are already affected by the absurdity of Neopronoun because they realize Neopronoun as ridiculous. Centrist liberals , moderate conservatives and independent left wing centers. They are all important people who participated in the society as they are paying their taxes.

Incidentally , I've nothing against their sexuality for existence of the people like gay community.

How are you affected?

How? Well , they have no reason to change languages like zhe xer or whatever. Just absurdity

[Ifreann]

How are you affected?

How? Well , they have no reason to change languages like zhe xer or whatever. Just absurdity

But how are you affected?

[Thermodolia]

I only have one pronoun: Lord.

What about King?

[Page]

Why the fuck do people just want to be dicks to other people? How the fuck is it affecting you if someone calls themselves "they/them" or a neopronoun. Like seriously, how is it affecting you? If someone's just wants to be referred to something like "they/them" or "xe/xer" it literally isn't harmful to everyone. Jesus fucking christ people just need to be nice.

We are already affected by the absurdity of Neopronoun because they realize Neopronoun as ridiculous. Centrist liberals , moderate conservatives and independent left wing centers. They are all important people who participated in the society as they are paying their taxes.

Incidentally , I've nothing against their sexuality for existence of the people like gay community.

Singular they isn't a neopronoun. It actually predates the singular you so unless you address people as "thou" you're just looking for an excuse to bully people.

[Thermodolia]

We are already affected by the absurdity of Neopronoun because they realize Neopronoun as ridiculous. Centrist liberals , moderate conservatives and independent left wing centers. They are all important people who participated in the society as they are paying their taxes.

Incidentally , I've nothing against their sexuality for existence of the people like gay community.

Singular they isn't a neopronoun. It actually predates the singular you so unless you address people as "thou" you're just looking for an excuse to bully people.

I think they where talking more about the “xe/xer” than “they/them”

[Imperial States of Duotona]

I'm fine with He/Him, She/Her, They/Them and even It/That to an extent.

I just don't understand any neo-pronouns past that. Apparently they're used by neurodivergent people from what I've been told (not taking it as solid evidence) but they just all seem like redundant iterations on They/Them.

[El Lazaro]

If you were raised speaking English, you know that “they” can be used as a gender neutral pronoun. I knew that before I knew that LGBT people existed. People have been using it since before any English speakers knew what a non-binary person was. Insisting its usage is wrong makes about as much sense as saying ð is still part of the English alphabet.

[Thermodolia]

I'm fine with He/Him, She/Her, They/Them and even It/That to an extent.

I just don't understand any neo-pronouns past that. Apparently they're used by neurodivergent people from what I've been told (not taking it as solid evidence) but they just all seem like redundant iterations on They/Them.

I refuse to call someone an it. That is just way too dehumanizing in my opinion and I won’t be party to it

[Ifreann]

I'm fine with He/Him, She/Her, They/Them and even It/That to an extent.

I just don't understand any neo-pronouns past that. Apparently they're used by neurodivergent people from what I've been told (not taking it as solid evidence) but they just all seem like redundant iterations on They/Them.

I refuse to call someone an it. That is just way too dehumanizing in my opinion and I won’t be party to it

How is it dehumanising to respect what a person tells you about itself?

[Thermodolia]

I refuse to call someone an it. That is just way too dehumanizing in my opinion and I won’t be party to it

How is it dehumanising to respect what a person tells you about itself?

I find it dehumanizing Iffy. I can’t do it. Sorry. It’s a feeling I have and I refuse to be part of it. Such dehumanizing language was used against my of my relatives and others I knew just for the beliefs they practiced. I refuse to go along with using it.

Just like I refuse to use “queer” that’s a slur and I don’t use slurs

[Hukhalia]

I'm fine with He/Him, She/Her, They/Them and even It/That to an extent.

I just don't understand any neo-pronouns past that. Apparently they're used by neurodivergent people from what I've been told (not taking it as solid evidence) but they just all seem like redundant iterations on They/Them.

The point is part satirical and part fundamental identity. Just because you don't experience it doesn't mean it isn't a thing. Imagine if we took that attitude towards trans people!!

[Ifreann]

How is it dehumanising to respect what a person tells you about itself?

I find it dehumanizing Iffy. I can’t do it. Sorry. It’s a feeling I have and I refuse to be part of it. Such dehumanizing language was used against my of my relatives and others I knew just for the beliefs they practiced. I refuse to go along with using it.

Seems to me that if that's what someone wants, then it isn't dehumanising.

Just like I refuse to use “queer” that’s a slur and I don’t use slurs

Words change, man.

[Hamidiye]

Personally I am a lazy old ***er and just want to avoid any hassle, so I'll even call someone an attack-helicopter if they ask for that. That's where the problem is though, the person from this article seems to skirt the edge of awareness for that problem itself.

There are many hilarious things in that article, but here is one that stuck out to me:

“I go to work. I’m wearing a miniskirt. Everyone asks me for my pronouns. To me, what that means is ‘I see that you’re a man. And I see that you’re dressed in a woman’s costume. And I would like to know whether or not you want me to participate in the fantasy you’re having,’ 

More among the line of "Shit, it's one of those. Ima get reported to HR if I don't walk on eggshells here." Would you be showing up in the classic triggering-costume (you know, tumblr-glasses, fake-red hair, outraged fishmouth) reactions would be pretty much the same.

I can’t help but think that the walking-on-eggshells battle for pronouns is turning my gender into a human-resources-approved corporate product, more neutered than neutral, and, maybe above all else, profoundly unromantic. Next time, just call me by my name.

Self-awareness, hooray! So what now, do I ask anyone I suspect of having [ionsert correct term for the bazillion-genders-symptom here] for their preferred pronouns? And I can't even call you by your name in a polite fashion anymore, what's nonbinary for Mister/Miss? Do I just flip a coin here?

It's like LGBWTFBBQC3P0 thing - everybody uses one, nobody agrees on a version. Which one can I safely use in any semi-official written communication without offending anyone? You know, in those instances when I actually have to give a *** about not offending anyone? Yes, I know, every idea has its extremists. Conservatives have the Q-Anon-MAGA-crowd, the nazis and the 4chan-boys with their tendie-stories-turned-politics. The leftists have uncle joe and Mao with Ze big Dong, and some people that would actually tell us that the absence of organized power structures would not lead to our world turning into fallout-4. (is there anything even remotely so absurd as an anarchist?) Then there's the apolitical people, those who would rather stuff their fingers in their ears and sing LALALALALA instead of acknowledging any problems. You have your own kind of crazy people, the loud minority. I bet most pronoun-proponents are perfectly reasonable people that do their jobs everyday. I don't share the opinions of the late General Evren either, or want to go and bomb Kürt villages to rubble for my kemalist giggles.

Find a way to make this whole thing practical and then get back to me, will you? Put in the engineering hours. The moment a feasible and practical solution comes forth most people will just quietly adopt it and the problems will go away, for the most part anyway.

[Hyidai]

Someone please answer this for me. If someone wants to use neo-pronouns, why should I give a damn? I genuinely can't see why.

[Armeattla]

It's like LGBWTFBBQC3P0 thing - everybody uses one, nobody agrees on a version. Which one can I safely use in any semi-official written communication without offending anyone? You know, in those instances when I actually have to give a *** about not offending anyone?

Should have read the thread, cuz I did adress that:

Hey, the actual one keeps changing (ore are there just factions that each have their own spelling for that?), and this keeps me from being bitched at for forgetting a letter or a plus or whatever.

The different communities in different countries use different combinations.
In the USA and UK it's LGBTQIA+, in Canada it is LGBT2IA+, in Germany it's LSBTI+, etc.pp. Simply using LGBT+ will upset exactly no one.