Zero Battery State

[Galloism]

How does it work if battery and murder are intertwined.

IE, in order to avoid instant teleportation preventing the deed, you shoot someone execution style while they sleep. That’s certainly battery, as a lesser included offense to murder.

But how will you face trial for murder if you are in extradimensional jail for battery? You have a right to face your accuser.

I think the idea is that your rights under the law are waived. The results are factually perfect but the process wouldn’t be a “proper courtroom.”

So the correct number of years/fines is reached that would be reached in a lengthy but correctly run courtroom.

But I thought the system only looked at battery, not other crimes (IE, murder, arson, fraud, etc).

[Valentine Z]

Makes me wonder of the world without chemical batteries will be feasible. That, and... Does a power plant count as a huge-ass battery?

Ahh, anyway. Does the button also count against wars? .. how would that work?

[Infected Mushroom]

I think the idea is that your rights under the law are waived. The results are factually perfect but the process wouldn’t be a “proper courtroom.”

So the correct number of years/fines is reached that would be reached in a lengthy but correctly run courtroom.

But I thought the system only looked at battery, not other crimes (IE, murder, arson, fraud, etc).

It can try more serious crimes if those things subsume or are connected to the battery, with the same levels and standards of perfect accuracy.

Does this affect your answer?

[Galloism]

But I thought the system only looked at battery, not other crimes (IE, murder, arson, fraud, etc).

It can try more serious crimes if those things subsume or are connected to the battery, with the same levels and standards of perfect accuracy.

Does this affect your answer?

Dramatically. Think about how many crimes are connected to battery.

[Infected Mushroom]

Makes me wonder of the world without chemical batteries will be feasible. That, and... Does a power plant count as a huge-ass battery?

Ahh, anyway. Does the button also count against wars? .. how would that work?

Wars would be considered extra judicial events outside of the System’s jurisdiction.

[Moscareinas]

Yes, without reserve.

[Free Ravensburg]

I will not press the button. While yes, it would remove crime, but there will be cases of self defense before any punches were made. I would not trust a [insert judicial system for this specific scenario here] with dealing out punishment.

[Vavlar]

Yes, we will have no more Lithium ion battery problems, no more Lead-acid battery, no Double-A or Tripe-A batteries!

Audience, you may now clap for your glorious and grand leader like this:
or else face the consequences of 0 health because of funny metal object going at super high speed from a funny long metal stick
-False Leader with stupid internet humor name Grand Leader Yurmum Iscringelol

[Infected Mushroom]

You can believe this all you want but that isn't going to stop me from throwing car batteries into the ocean.

Halt! That’s a salt and battery.

Why did the police fail to stop the battery?

[The Alma Mater]

What happens if someone deliberately provokes you to hit them?

[Thermodolia]

Halt! That’s a salt and battery.

Why did the police fail to stop the battery?

It was already dead

[Space Squid]

What happens if someone deliberately provokes you to hit them?

Bait? In an Infected Mushroom thread?

Perish the thought!

[Valentine Z]

Why did the police fail to stop the battery?

It was already dead

Fell flat, the police officer in question got discharged.

[Infected Mushroom]

It was already dead

Fell flat, the police officer in question got discharged.

I like it.

But I was thinking it:“Because it kept on charging.”

[Infected Mushroom]

Why did the police fail to stop the battery?

It was already dead

Because it kept on charging.

[Saint Kanye]

It was already dead

Because it kept on charging.

But how do you keep it from charging?

Take away its credit cards.

[Ethel mermania]

What button do I press so I can bitch slap anyone at any time for any reason?

I dont think you can get a warrantee on the parts.

When I was a wee lad we had a legal aide attorney come into our 6th grade classroom and after describing what he did he asked us. If you could give someone a 100% effective truth serum, to find if they had committed a crime or not should we do it?

He argued no, people shouldn't have to convict themselves, and the integrity and the fairness of the process is what are most important.

I tend to think in a perfect world the correct outcome is more important that justice is served than how we got there. Since we don't live in a perfect world I like American due process.

So if the button were infallible I push it. That said will Smith still doesn't do jail time.

[Infected Mushroom]

What button do I press so I can bitch slap anyone at any time for any reason?

I dont think you can get a warrantee on the parts.

When I was a wee lad we had a legal aide attorney come into our 6th grade classroom and after describing what he did he asked us. If you could give someone a 100% effective truth serum, to find if they had committed a crime or not should we do it?

He argued no, people shouldn't have to convict themselves, and the integrity and the fairness of the process is what are most important.

I tend to think in a perfect world the correct outcome is more important that justice is served than how we got there. Since we don't live in a perfect world I like American due process.

So if the button were infallible I push it. That said will Smith still doesn't do jail time.

Yes. I like this.

It is very clear that you understand the crux of the issue in the hypothetical.

[Infected Mushroom]

What happens if someone deliberately provokes you to hit them?

While provocation is seldom recognized as a complete defense, in extreme cases it may serve as a limited mitigating factor in assessing damages and time served where applicable.

[Hispida]

What happens if someone deliberately provokes you to hit them?

While provocation is seldom recognized as a complete defense, in extreme cases it may serve as a limited mitigating factor in assessing damages and time served where applicable.

what if the person in question just really needs to be punched

[Ifreann]

If someone tried to tell me about a magical button I would stop listening and leave the conversation.

[Infected Mushroom]

While provocation is seldom recognized as a complete defense, in extreme cases it may serve as a limited mitigating factor in assessing damages and time served where applicable.

what if the person in question just really needs to be punched

My understanding is that the law doesn't allow for that, not under the context of provocation alone.

[Hispida]

what if the person in question just really needs to be punched

My understanding is that the law doesn't allow for that, not under the context of provocation alone.

well that's fuckin stupid

[Heloin]

what if the person in question just really needs to be punched

My understanding is that the law doesn't allow for that, not under the context of provocation alone.

Punch the law.

[Chan Island]

Such a button would do a lot of good. No more assault, domestic violence limited, murder becomes far rarer. But yet, I narrowly find myself not pushing this button for 3 reasons; lack of exceptions, susceptibility to law, and lack of jury nullification.

In this world, no child is going to make it to age 5 without at least one stint in the slammer. Good samaritans will be punished for trying to help in the wrong ways (like, say, when trying to do the Heimlich manoeuvre, which would technically be battery but may save your life). Professional wrestlers become a thing of the past, as will all martial arts. Random, harmless spats will suddenly turn into life-changing events.
And even if we did start to talk about exceptions (of which of course war is an exception, you Putin-apologist, but we'll put a pin in that), we're soon going be asking uncomfortable discussions which I strongly suspect would have unjust results. Police for example must be allowed a certain degree of leniency (their job would be impossible without it, and they would still be necessary in this world), but would protesters be allowed the same luxury? Could police get away with brutalising demonstrations knowing that if any of them dare resist they'd be teleported away? What about in self-defence- specifically pre-emptively so? A person who points a gun at me isn't committing battery, but if I don't punch them I'm not going to bed tonight.

And then there is war, which you specifically carve out as an exception, making this button 50% less appealing. But what does that mean? Would a war have to be formally declared to get the exemption? And what about in civil war- this button could potentially be an automatic win button for every government in every civil war, and I am not so sure that's a good idea. Sometimes the rebels are in the right, but uprisings would be utterly impossible in this world.

Then there's point 2, the susceptibility to law. Vladimir Putin legalised domestic violence in Russia- so does that mean that when a Russian man beats his wife, nothing will happen? Meanwhile right across the border a Finnish man would disappear for many years. What about FMG? This world either a giant violation of national sovereignty (which I'm all for, but am not reassured this would be a desirable universal standard) or would allow the creation of places of concentrated, legalised horror.

Last of all is the complete lack jury nullification. This is a concept in common law where a jury can decide that even though the defendant committed the crime, they should not be punished for it. It's not some obscure fiction either- last year a prominent Black Lives Matter protester was spared a prison sentence via jury nullification in the US. In practice, we exercise it in our daily lives all the time- everyone knows at least one person who takes illegal drugs, but we don't report them to the cops do we? We didn't have our uni housemates arrested for theft because they drank our last soda bottle. Sometimes it is just not worth the hassle- other times the crime is entirely justified. But this would not be the case here. Every infraction that can be classed as battery makes a person disappear, no matter how minor or justified it was. And, frankly, some people deserve a slap every once in a while.

So no, I wouldn't. This button is incompatible with the existence of free people.