Comical Historical Events

[Christian Confederation]

Stalin died because his Gaurds were to scared to check on him and all the doctors who could have saved him were in the gulag.

Quite apart from not being particularly funny - the Death of Stalin does dark comedy around the events much better - this post is also untrue.

Stalin died two days after suffering a massive stroke. It's true that it took some time to discover him the morning after his stroke as he'd left strict orders with his guards the previous evening that he wasn't to be disturbed, but he was still alive when his housekeeper entered his personal quarters. But it would have made no difference. The stroke was so severe that he would have died regardless of how quickly he was discovered, and no matter who had offered him medical care. It's remarkable that he lingered on as long as he did, not that he died.


So congratulations, you're now offering us posts that are neither funny nor historically accurate.

2 days later or an hour later it can still be partly attributed to scaring the Gaurds so bad they don't check on him even if they hsd probable cause to check in him. But yeah he was a dead man the second he had the stroke, back then same as today unfortunately a stroke will kill you or perilize you. Now Doctors can at least do something to help if your found soon enough but still it's basically a death sentence.

[Ethel mermania]

Quite apart from not being particularly funny - the Death of Stalin does dark comedy around the events much better - this post is also untrue.

Stalin died two days after suffering a massive stroke. It's true that it took some time to discover him the morning after his stroke as he'd left strict orders with his guards the previous evening that he wasn't to be disturbed, but he was still alive when his housekeeper entered his personal quarters. But it would have made no difference. The stroke was so severe that he would have died regardless of how quickly he was discovered, and no matter who had offered him medical care. It's remarkable that he lingered on as long as he did, not that he died.


So congratulations, you're now offering us posts that are neither funny nor historically accurate.

2 days later or an hour later it can still be partly attributed to scaring the Gaurds so bad they don't check on him even if they hsd probable cause to check in him. But yeah he was a dead man the second he had the stroke, back then same as today unfortunately a stroke will kill you or perilize you. Now Doctors can at least do something to help if your found soon enough but still it's basically a death sentence.

Which isn't fucking funny.

I dont know why you are so set on ruining the OP's thread, but I guess since you seem to get off on whatever power trip it gives you, enjoy

[The Archregimancy]

Quite apart from not being particularly funny - the Death of Stalin does dark comedy around the events much better - this post is also untrue.

Stalin died two days after suffering a massive stroke. It's true that it took some time to discover him the morning after his stroke as he'd left strict orders with his guards the previous evening that he wasn't to be disturbed, but he was still alive when his housekeeper entered his personal quarters. But it would have made no difference. The stroke was so severe that he would have died regardless of how quickly he was discovered, and no matter who had offered him medical care. It's remarkable that he lingered on as long as he did, not that he died.


So congratulations, you're now offering us posts that are neither funny nor historically accurate.

2 days later or an hour later it can still be partly attributed to scaring the Gaurds so bad they don't check on him even if they hsd probable cause to check in him. But yeah he was a dead man the second he had the stroke, back then same as today unfortunately a stroke will kill you or perilize you. Now Doctors can at least do something to help if your found soon enough but still it's basically a death sentence.

Your posts on this subject are ill-informed, inaccurate, and utterly devoid of humour.

I can't stop you from posting in this thread, but I do wish you'd give it a rest.

[Free Algerstonia]

at least 69 people are born every day

[The Two Jerseys]

Ulysses S. Grant's plan for the Battle of Iuka was to have two forces under generals William Rosecrans and Edward Ord approach from different directions and conduct a double envelopment of the Confederate army, with Ord to wait until he heard the sound of battle before launching his assault. However, despite being only a few miles away Ord couldn't hear the battle due to the wind direction creating an acoustic shadow, and he never knew that the battle had started until it was already over.

This wasn't an isolated incident either, there are at least four other documented battles during the Civil War where a commander was unaware of an engagement due to an acoustic shadow.

[Uan aa Boa]

In the 1930s physicist and later Nobel prize winner Pyotr Kapitsa asked Ernest Rutherford for a job at his Cambridge lab, but Rutherford was reluctant. Kapitsa asked him what he considered to be an acceptable error margin in his work. Puzzled, Rutherford replied about 3%. Kapitsa pointed out that 30 people currently worked in the lab and that with that level of precision Rutherford wouldn't even notice he was there. He got the job.

[Perikuresu]

The guy who wrote the Icelandic translation of the novel Dracula, which was published in 1901, however in 2014, a Dutch scholar noticed that the book wasn't a translation of Dracula, but essentially a fanfic rewrite of the whole story, where the original plot was kept, but the names of each characters was changed and the translator put an emphasis on the sexuality of the characters.

Good thing was the book was shorter

[Heloin]

The guy who wrote the Icelandic translation of the novel Dracula, which was published in 1901, however in 2014, a Dutch scholar noticed that the book wasn't a translation of Dracula, but essentially a fanfic rewrite of the whole story, where the original plot was kept, but the names of each characters was changed and the translator put an emphasis on the sexuality of the characters.

Good thing was the book was shorter

I had to look it up and the wikipedia page provides the best (and only contemporary) review of the translation:

Without doubt, for the largest part it is worthless rubbish and sometimes even worse than worthless, completely devoid of poetry and beauty and far removed from any psychological truth. "Fjallkonan" presented various kinds of garbage, including a long story, "Powers of Darkness". That story would have been better left unwritten, and I cannot see that such nonsense has enriched our literature.

[The Archregimancy]

The guy who wrote the Icelandic translation of the novel Dracula, which was published in 1901, however in 2014, a Dutch scholar noticed that the book wasn't a translation of Dracula, but essentially a fanfic rewrite of the whole story, where the original plot was kept, but the names of each characters was changed and the translator put an emphasis on the sexuality of the characters.

Good thing was the book was shorter

This is a somewhat unfair outline of the events.

It's considered likely that the Icelandic translator Valdimar Ásmundsson had access to an earlier draft of Bram Stoker's novel rather than the version Stoker published. Stoker's English-language version was published in 1897, and the Icelandic version in 1901.

What's unclear about the Icelandic version is to what extent Ásmundsson was simply relying on an unpublished draft (potentially provided directly by Stoker) or took direct initiative in changing parts of the book. But there are aspects of the Icelandic translation - the change in location of Dracula's residence in England, the nature of some of the characters that don't appear in Stoker's published version - that Stoker's own notes reveal were part of his original outline for the novel, and therefore are highly unlikely to have been simple coincidental inventions on Ásmundsson's part. Ásmundsson's reliance on early drafts has been acknowledged and defended by Stoker scholars.

So calling it a 'fanfic rewrite' is more than a little unfair.

[The Selkie]

The Marseillaise-Scene is one of the pivotal scenes of one of the most famous movies of all time, of Casablanca..
It's 1941, the place - Casablanca. Europe is under Nazi-Germany's jackboot and things don't really look good for the rest either. Marokko, part of French North Africa, is under Vichy-French control, so many flee to there to get to Lisbon in neutral Portugal and from there to America... most don't make it, as the corrupt head of police collaborates with the Germans. Rick’s Café Américain is the meeting place of many of the migrants, among them Victor László (Paul Henreid) and Ilsa Lund (Ingrid Bergmann).
Things happen, the Nazis are in the Cafe and sing Die Wacht am Rhein, László replies by leading the French into singing the French National Anthem, the Marseillaise.
Aside from Henreid's beautiful French singing, here comes the fun part: The original plan was, that the French Anthem is opposed by the Nazi-Anthem, the Horst Wessel Lied. However, that song was still under copyright in non-allied countries, so they had to use Die Wacht am Rhein. Turns out, that World War or not, the only thing more powerful is the YouTube Copyright Algorhythm copyright law.
The movie came to Germany in 1952, with 25 minutes missing. All references to Nazis and the War were edited out, László went from being a Resistance fighter fleeing the Nazis to being a Norwegian atomic physicist hunted by Interpol after he "broke out of jail." In 1975, the original plot version dubbed into German was released.

[Concejos Unidos]

Jin Ping Mei, or The Golden Lotus is a derivative work focusing with graphic, erotic detail on the sex life of a minor character in the even more famous Outlaws of the Marsh. Historically, the work was censored as a pornographic work, but now, this 16th century anonymous erotic fanfiction is reckoned one of the finest and most significant works of the Classical Chinese literary tradition and is considered one of the Six Classics.

[Kowani]

the most inane parliamentary maneuver in American history comes from Sen. James Allen (D-KS): a motion to table a motion to reconsider a vote to table an appeal of a ruling that a point of order was not in order against a motion to table another point of order against a motion to bring to a vote the motion to call up the resolution that would institute a rules change



he lost

[Ethel mermania]

the most inane parliamentary maneuver in American history comes from Sen. James Allen (D-KS): a motion to table a motion to reconsider a vote to table an appeal of a ruling that a point of order was not in order against a motion to table another point of order against a motion to bring to a vote the motion to call up the resolution that would institute a rules change



he lost

How can you tell?


I got lost on the second point of order

[Kowani]

the most inane parliamentary maneuver in American history comes from Sen. James Allen (D-KS): a motion to table a motion to reconsider a vote to table an appeal of a ruling that a point of order was not in order against a motion to table another point of order against a motion to bring to a vote the motion to call up the resolution that would institute a rules change



he lost

How can you tell?

the rules change went through

I got lost on the second point of order

A motion to call up a resolution that would institute a rules change needed to be voted on, someone filed a motion to do to that, a point of order was raised against it, someone moved to table the POO, someone filed a different POO against the motion to table, that was appealed to the parliamentarian, who ruled the second POO out of order, someone appealed that (to the whole senate), someone filed a motion to table the second appeal, the senate finally voted, someone moved to reconsider the vote, Allen voted to table that reconsideration

[Great Heathen Air Force]

There is a (probably fictional) account of the Viking Rolf and the King of France: Rolf, having been granted lordship over the lower Seine, was told that it was customary to kiss the kings foot. He refused. After some haggling they agreed on a compromise. One of Rolf's warriors would kiss the King's foot, on his behalf.

Allegedly the warrior seized the King's leg, tipped him over backwards, raised the royal foot high into the air, and kissed it. To the complete shock of the French court, and the laughter of all the Norsemen present.

[Farnhamia]

There is a (probably fictional) account of the Viking Rolf and the King of France: Rolf, having been granted lordship over the lower Seine, was told that it was customary to kiss the kings foot. He refused. After some haggling they agreed on a compromise. One of Rolf's warriors would kiss the King's foot, on his behalf.

Allegedly the warrior seized the King's leg, tipped him over backwards, raised the royal foot high into the air, and kissed it. To the complete shock of the French court, and the laughter of all the Norsemen present.

Yeah, Charles the Third, called the Fat for no discernable reason.

[Great Heathen Air Force]

There is a (probably fictional) account of the Viking Rolf and the King of France: Rolf, having been granted lordship over the lower Seine, was told that it was customary to kiss the kings foot. He refused. After some haggling they agreed on a compromise. One of Rolf's warriors would kiss the King's foot, on his behalf.

Allegedly the warrior seized the King's leg, tipped him over backwards, raised the royal foot high into the air, and kissed it. To the complete shock of the French court, and the laughter of all the Norsemen present.

Yeah, Charles the Third, called the Fat for no discernable reason.

I believe it was actually Charles the Simple? A similarly cruel epithet. The Early Middle Ages was apparently a time when scholars could get away with anything, and lords were powerless to stop them.

I've also heard Rolf referred to as Rollo or Rolloun. I think that must be a Frenchified pronunciation. But I suspect Rolf isn't a proper Norse name either. Probably something like "Hrolfgar."

[Concejos Unidos]

I believe it was actually Charles the Simple? A similarly cruel epithet. The Early Middle Ages was apparently a time when scholars could get away with anything, and lords were powerless to stop them.

I've also heard Rolf referred to as Rollo or Rolloun. I think that must be a Frenchified pronunciation. But I suspect Rolf isn't a proper Norse name either. Probably something like "Hrolfgar."

The epithet of Rolf/Rollo was apparently "Rollo the Walker," supposedly because he was too heavy/tall/something for horseback riding.

[Great Heathen Air Force]

I believe it was actually Charles the Simple? A similarly cruel epithet. The Early Middle Ages was apparently a time when scholars could get away with anything, and lords were powerless to stop them.

I've also heard Rolf referred to as Rollo or Rolloun. I think that must be a Frenchified pronunciation. But I suspect Rolf isn't a proper Norse name either. Probably something like "Hrolfgar."

The epithet of Rolf/Rollo was apparently "Rollo the Walker," supposedly because he was too heavy/tall/something for horseback riding.

A common misunderstanding.

He was, in fact, an AT-AT.

[Farnhamia]

Yeah, Charles the Third, called the Fat for no discernable reason.

I believe it was actually Charles the Simple? A similarly cruel epithet. The Early Middle Ages was apparently a time when scholars could get away with anything, and lords were powerless to stop them.

I've also heard Rolf referred to as Rollo or Rolloun. I think that must be a Frenchified pronunciation. But I suspect Rolf isn't a proper Norse name either. Probably something like "Hrolfgar."

Was it? They were all like peas in a pod. And I was busy in Ireland back then.

[WayNeacTia]

2022-05-24 Washington, D.C.

Clarence Thomas, Associate Justice for the Supreme Court of The United States of America doesn't believe contraception should be a basic human right. What a great time to be alive....

[The Archregimancy]

2022-05-24 Washington, D.C.

Clarence Thomas, Associate Justice for the Supreme Court of The United States of America doesn't believe contraception should be a basic human right. What a great time to be alive....

I appreciate the depth of feeling, but this is what the thread OP states:

In an attempt to lighten the mood a bit...

This thread invites you to share your favourite comical historical event. Note that the intent is that these should be relatively light-hearted historical events (conceding that they likely weren't always comical or light-hearted for the people involved) rather than snarky commentary on present events.

So please, let's not bring contemporary politics into the thread.

[WayNeacTia]

2022-05-24 Washington, D.C.

Clarence Thomas, Associate Justice for the Supreme Court of The United States of America doesn't believe contraception should be a basic human right. What a great time to be alive....

I appreciate the depth of feeling, but this is what the thread OP states:

In an attempt to lighten the mood a bit...

This thread invites you to share your favourite comical historical event. Note that the intent is that these should be relatively light-hearted historical events (conceding that they likely weren't always comical or light-hearted for the people involved) rather than snarky commentary on present events.

So please, let's not bring contemporary politics into the thread.

My bad. Should have probably read the OP.

[The Selkie]

Yeah, Charles the Third, called the Fat for no discernable reason.

I believe it was actually Charles the Simple? A similarly cruel epithet. The Early Middle Ages was apparently a time when scholars could get away with anything, and lords were powerless to stop them.

I've also heard Rolf referred to as Rollo or Rolloun. I think that must be a Frenchified pronunciation. But I suspect Rolf isn't a proper Norse name either. Probably something like "Hrolfgar."

I once read somewhere, that he was called Charles the Simple because he was rather straightforward, read simple in his speaking. Granted, in German he is known as Karl der Einfältige, although The Greatest Source Of All Knowledge In The World hurries to say, that it is meant as "Karl der Geradlinige." His Father, Louis II., the Stammerer, might have had a far crueler lot in life as far as the chronicles are concerned.

[Big Bad Blue]

I appreciate the depth of feeling, but this is what the thread OP states:



So please, let's not bring contemporary politics into the thread.

My bad. Should have probably read the OP.

The really hilarious part tho is that Loving v. Virginia, the 1967 Supremes decision that struck down the state anti-miscegenation laws that would have prevented Thomas from marrying his current wife or living with her in their Virginia home had they remained in effect, is based in the same "constructive due process" jurisprudence he's so dead set against when it comes to contraception (not to mention same-sex marriage and butt sex)! And his wife's name is "Virginia!" rotflmao