Favorite conspiracy

[Nordeslund]

Mattress stores are just fronts for money laundering and the drug trade. I've seen many a mattress store across the street/a few blocks from another mattress store. Is demand really that high, especially with Amazon? Or is there a conspiracy...

Not to get all tin-foil-hat, seen-too-many-conspiracy-thrillers on you, but this is true where I live, there’s literally 4 mattress stores on one intersection…

[HISPIDA]

Oh, wait. Don't know if this is a conspiracy, but Kurt Cobain was definitely shot by Courtney Love.

I mean...it is what qualifies as a conspiracy in that it's speculative but probably not true. If I was married to Courtney Love I'd probably shoot myself too.

Not to threadjack, but it's definitely true. Not only did she demand that all photos of Cobain's death be destroyed, but she also posed as his mother and released a missing person's report claiming that he was suicidal with a shotgun (which was, unfortunately, true). Cobain was also out-of-his-mind high; he had 3x the lethal limit of heroin in his body. How the hell did he pull a trigger that high? There was also Eldon Hoke, the lead singer of The Mentors, nicknamed "El Duce", who claimed he was offered $50,000 to kill Cobain by none other than Love herself; three years after Cobain's death he was run over by a train. Love and Cobain were also reportedly about to divorce and the latter was looking to remove the former from his will. No fingerprints were found on the shotgun he used to "kill himself," and Cobain wasn't wearing any gloves.

Finally, and what is in my opinion the most damning evidence; Love was practicing copying Cobain's handwriting (the entire alphabet) and wrote a note that was found in his wallet that reads the following: "Do you Kurt Cobain take Courtney Michelle Love to be your lawful shredded wife, even when she’s a bitch with zits and siphoning all [your] money for doping and whoring. Will you promise to fuck her at least once a week, O.K." The handwriting practice sheet was found in her backpack. She also attempted to claim that an accidental painkiller overdose (ruled as an accident in 1994 because he was suffering from influenza and fatigue) was actually a suicide attempt despite being ruled as an accident by professionals.

[Agustio]

Andrew Johnson was actually Hannibal Hamlin in disguise.

[Cannot think of a name]

Honestly as mundane as it is, flat earthers.

Just because I can't figure out who is supposed to be profiting from 'the big lie' about the earth being round that they've gone to such lengths to 'conceal the truth.' Like is it a conspiracy of cartographers that somehow worked it out with astronomers? In there mind, why is it so important that people think the earth is round that they'd go to the lengths needed to create that impression?

[Keira]

Off the top of my head, I can't think of any conspiracy that doesn't piss me off or isn't so obviously satire that it doesn't count. I just really cannot stand misinformation, especially when it's intentional and harms people's lives.

So, I don't have a favourite one, because I don't even have one that I "like".

Edit: Does the ancient astronaut theory count? I feel like that's more of a legit theory than a conspiracy, but it is fascinating nonetheless.

[Elsa De Arendelle]

All conspiracy theories are true.

All flat top mountains (Devil’s mountain in the USA for example) across the flat earth world used to be giant trees that reached far above the clouds. They were chopped down by nephilims. That’s where you get your Jack and the Beanstalk story. All true. All Fairy tales happened 5000+ years ago during the time of Adam and Eve. Some of the giant trees were chopped down by settlers in the USA, but that’s not mentioned in history.

[Torisakia]

That aliens are the cause of Atlantis, cowlicks, 99 cent stores, and those mysterious circles that popup in crop fields over night.

[Stellar Colonies]

Honestly as mundane as it is, flat earthers.

Just because I can't figure out who is supposed to be profiting from 'the big lie' about the earth being round that they've gone to such lengths to 'conceal the truth.' Like is it a conspiracy of cartographers that somehow worked it out with astronomers? In there mind, why is it so important that people think the earth is round that they'd go to the lengths needed to create that impression?

Big Globe needs to sell those...globes...to schools, and astronomers are in their pockets to get that sweet, succulent cash from globe sales.

They've gotten so much money from globe selling, even God is bribed to cloak the flat earth behind a mirage of irrefutable round earth evidence.

[Resilient Acceleration]

For a more light-hearted version this time, the theory that my country Indonesia was the location of Atlantis. This is funny because I once believed it, because I read a long-ass book detailing it when I was like 9. The theory suggests that Atlantis City is located in ancient Krakatoa and when it exploded ~11000 years ago, it obliterated the entire thing, explaining why there's zero evidence about the ancient civilization now since everything was erased. (Funnily enough, I haven't yet seen anywhere on Google that such an event actually happened). They also combined things from the end of the ice age, which drowns vast areas of Sundaland and turned it into the current archipelago, thus explaining the "drowning" part of the tale.

[Necroghastia]

I'm surprised "Paul McCartney is dead" hasn't been mentioned yet.

[Heloin]

I'm surprised "Paul McCartney is dead" hasn't been mentioned yet.

This reminded me that I had a Barbara Bush is still alive t-shirt that I lost about a year ago.

[The H Corporation]

Mark Zuckerberg is a reptilian. And it is probably true :P

[Bursken]

Neither does Paraguay

Neither does Wyoming.

neither does Australia

[Cannot think of a name]

Honestly as mundane as it is, flat earthers.

Just because I can't figure out who is supposed to be profiting from 'the big lie' about the earth being round that they've gone to such lengths to 'conceal the truth.' Like is it a conspiracy of cartographers that somehow worked it out with astronomers? In there mind, why is it so important that people think the earth is round that they'd go to the lengths needed to create that impression?

Big Globe needs to sell those...globes...to schools, and astronomers are in their pockets to get that sweet, succulent cash from globe sales.

They've gotten so much money from globe selling, even God is bribed to cloak the flat earth behind a mirage of irrefutable round earth evidence.

I knew god was on the take.

[Cosmic79]

That aliens are the cause of Atlantis, cowlicks, 99 cent stores, and those mysterious circles that popup in crop fields over night.

99cent stores exist to fund alien scouting operations on Earth.

[Kragholm Free States]

That the really wacky shit like flat earth, reptoids, faked moon landings etc. is all started and propagated by intelligence agencies, likely planting their "theories" in the heads of genuinely mentally ill people and taking advantage of them to spread their ideas. And it's all done so that accusations of government corruption, overreach, espionage, torture, assassinations, unethical experimentation, disturbingly close ties with certain major corporations and NGOs etc. can be lumped into the same category of "conspiracy theories" as the aforementioned really wacky shit.

Come to think of it that's not my favourite, because it's depressingly likely to be true.

Uhhh can't beat the good old moon is made of cheese one I guess.

[Drew Durrnil]

Paul McCartney died in a car accident in 1968.

[Rusozak]

That Australia doesn't exist and is an elaborate ruse as part of the flat Earth conspiracy.

[Forsher]

Contemporary art.

They assassinated Herge before he could complete his expose.

[Bursken]

That Australia doesn't exist and is an elaborate ruse as part of the flat Earth conspiracy.

As an Australian, I can confirm I don't exsist

[Resilient Acceleration]

Mark Zuckerberg is a reptilian. And it is probably true

Flat out wrong. Field evidence doesn't support the notion that Zuckerberg is composed of living matter, or carbon for that matter, in any way. Smh people today and its disinformation.

[Zetastan]

The Tartaria Empire/Mudflood thing. Do you know it? It's utterly stupid but hilarious.

[Grave_n_idle]

I mean...it is what qualifies as a conspiracy in that it's speculative but probably not true. If I was married to Courtney Love I'd probably shoot myself too.

Not to threadjack, but it's definitely true. Not only did she demand that all photos of Cobain's death be destroyed, but she also posed as his mother and released a missing person's report claiming that he was suicidal with a shotgun (which was, unfortunately, true). Cobain was also out-of-his-mind high; he had 3x the lethal limit of heroin in his body. How the hell did he pull a trigger that high? There was also Eldon Hoke, the lead singer of The Mentors, nicknamed "El Duce", who claimed he was offered $50,000 to kill Cobain by none other than Love herself; three years after Cobain's death he was run over by a train. Love and Cobain were also reportedly about to divorce and the latter was looking to remove the former from his will. No fingerprints were found on the shotgun he used to "kill himself," and Cobain wasn't wearing any gloves.

Finally, and what is in my opinion the most damning evidence; Love was practicing copying Cobain's handwriting (the entire alphabet) and wrote a note that was found in his wallet that reads the following: "Do you Kurt Cobain take Courtney Michelle Love to be your lawful shredded wife, even when she’s a bitch with zits and siphoning all [your] money for doping and whoring. Will you promise to fuck her at least once a week, O.K." The handwriting practice sheet was found in her backpack. She also attempted to claim that an accidental painkiller overdose (ruled as an accident in 1994 because he was suffering from influenza and fatigue) was actually a suicide attempt despite being ruled as an accident by professionals.

Start a thread about it, by all means - but you don't know what 'definitely true' means.

[The Archregimancy]

Honestly as mundane as it is, flat earthers.

I wonder if there's any overlap between flat earthers and hollow earthers?

[Pasong Tirad]

Not exactly a "conspiracy." More like a rumor that resurfaces on social media every time he is on the news or has a movie. But the "conspiracy" is that Timothee Chalamet was so prolific with his relations while at NYU that he started a chlamydia outbreak.