On Sex-Related Stereotyping in Schools

[New haven america]

Slurs are bad, yes. If I wasn't opposed to using slurs in my everyday speech, I might even say that
But, as I said, I'm opposed to slurs.

I’m sure the law was very offended at me designating it such.

But you keep insisting on using the “toxic masculinity” gendered slur, despite a supermajority of both men and women recognizing it as hateful, insulting, and harmful to boys.

And you used a slur that the supermajority of people in general view as hateful, harmful, and insulting to people with developmental disabilities.

Gotta practice what you preach. ¯\_ (ツ)_/¯

[Galloism]

I’m sure the law was very offended at me designating it such.

But you keep insisting on using the “toxic masculinity” gendered slur, despite a supermajority of both men and women recognizing it as hateful, insulting, and harmful to boys.

And you used a slur that the supermajority of people in general view as hateful, harmful, and insulting to people with developmental disabilities.

Gotta practice what you preach. ¯\_ (ツ)_/¯

Honestly, I’ve never seen anyone offended at the usage of the term towards inanimate objects, but if it is offensive in that context, I will stop using it that way going forward.

Because when you are informed of such things, you should course correct.

[The Republic of Fore]

This is some bullshit.

Telling guys to get some balls is a normal thing. How in hell is it sexist? It’s just telling someone to stop being a bitch, albeit in a very slightly more polite way. The fact that masculinity is being considered toxic is worrying.

Thank you for showcasing a prime example of toxic masculinity.

Can't showcase something that doesn't exist. Masculinity bashing needs to go away.

[Necroghastia]

Thank you for showcasing a prime example of toxic masculinity.

Can't showcase something that doesn't exist. Masculinity bashing needs to go away.

So, is it a good thing to tell boys who are upset by something to "grow some balls?" Is it the masculine thing to do?

[New haven america]

Thank you for showcasing a prime example of toxic masculinity.

Can't showcase something that doesn't exist. Masculinity bashing needs to go away.

Thank you for also showcasing a prime example of toxic masculinity.

[Galloism]

Can't showcase something that doesn't exist. Masculinity bashing needs to go away.

Thank you for also showcasing a prime example of toxic masculinity.

You mean internalized misandry.

[The Republic of Fore]

Can't showcase something that doesn't exist. Masculinity bashing needs to go away.

So, is it a good thing to tell boys who are upset by something to "grow some balls?" Is it the masculine thing to do?

Yep, if hearing the phrase "grow some balls" traumatizes you that much then I truly pity you for when you have to experience the real world outside of school. Sometimes people need to be told to stop crying over something. Crying doesn't solve problems, action does. As the great Dr house once said "Why am I not more upset about this? AHH SHE'S DYING EVERYTHING IS HORRIBLE! Did that help? Did you figure out what's wrong with her while I did that?"

[The Republic of Fore]

Can't showcase something that doesn't exist. Masculinity bashing needs to go away.

Thank you for also showcasing a prime example of toxic masculinity.

Thank you for showcasing a prime example of things that are imaginary.

[Galloism]

So, is it a good thing to tell boys who are upset by something to "grow some balls?" Is it the masculine thing to do?

Yep, if hearing the phrase "grow some balls" traumatizes you that much then I truly pity you for when you have to experience the real world outside of school. Sometimes people need to be told to stop crying over something. Crying doesn't solve problems, action does. As the great Dr house once said "Why am I not more upset about this? AHH SHE'S DYING EVERYTHING IS HORRIBLE! Did that help? Did you figure out what's wrong with her while I did that?"

So you’re missing the forest for the trees.

It’s likely this misandry is one of the driving factors of the male suicide rate - a world that doesn’t care about men’s problems and tells them to shut up when they’re in pain. Notably, no one says this stuff repeatedly to women, and, quelle surprise, their suicide rate is incredibly lower than men.

[The Republic of Fore]

Yep, if hearing the phrase "grow some balls" traumatizes you that much then I truly pity you for when you have to experience the real world outside of school. Sometimes people need to be told to stop crying over something. Crying doesn't solve problems, action does. As the great Dr house once said "Why am I not more upset about this? AHH SHE'S DYING EVERYTHING IS HORRIBLE! Did that help? Did you figure out what's wrong with her while I did that?"

So you’re missing the forest for the trees.

It’s likely this misandry is one of the driving factors of the male suicide rate - a world that doesn’t care about men’s problems and tells them to shut up when they’re in pain. Notably, no one says this stuff repeatedly to women, and, quelle surprise, their suicide rate is incredibly lower than men.

So some men are overly fragile, is this supposed to be news? Crying and whining all the time doesn't solve problems either.

[Galloism]

So you’re missing the forest for the trees.

It’s likely this misandry is one of the driving factors of the male suicide rate - a world that doesn’t care about men’s problems and tells them to shut up when they’re in pain. Notably, no one says this stuff repeatedly to women, and, quelle surprise, their suicide rate is incredibly lower than men.

So some men are overly fragile, is this supposed to be news? Crying and whining all the time doesn't solve problems either.

So balance is important. The problem is our society doesn’t have it.

“Crying and whining all the time” is of course not a healthy or good approach. But neither is bottling it up inside until it manifests as a heart condition or a bullet to the head.

The problem is men are told to do the latter. This is not healthy and is actively harmful.

[Necroghastia]

So, is it a good thing to tell boys who are upset by something to "grow some balls?" Is it the masculine thing to do?

Yep, if hearing the phrase "grow some balls" traumatizes you that much then I truly pity you for when you have to experience the real world outside of school.

im in my twenties lol

Sometimes people need to be told to stop crying over something.

and sometimes people need to have a good cry.

Crying doesn't solve problems, action does.

crying is an action. crying is a way for the body to release tension and process things.

As the great Dr house once said "Why am I not more upset about this? AHH SHE'S DYING EVERYTHING IS HORRIBLE! Did that help? Did you figure out what's wrong with her while I did that?"

never watched house but from what i know isn't part of the point that he's kind of a shitty person?

[The Republic of Fore]

So some men are overly fragile, is this supposed to be news? Crying and whining all the time doesn't solve problems either.

So balance is important. The problem is our society doesn’t have it.

“Crying and whining all the time” is of course not a healthy or good approach. But neither is bottling it up inside until it manifests as a heart condition or a bullet to the head.

The problem is men are told to do the latter. This is not healthy and is actively harmful.

Nobody is forcing men to keep their emotions in. There's no gun to your head demanding that you never cry. If you can't cry because "society won't like it" then that's a personal issue.

[The Republic of Fore]

Yep, if hearing the phrase "grow some balls" traumatizes you that much then I truly pity you for when you have to experience the real world outside of school.

im in my twenties lol

Sometimes people need to be told to stop crying over something.

and sometimes people need to have a good cry.

Crying doesn't solve problems, action does.

crying is an action. crying is a way for the body to release tension and process things.

As the great Dr house once said "Why am I not more upset about this? AHH SHE'S DYING EVERYTHING IS HORRIBLE! Did that help? Did you figure out what's wrong with her while I did that?"

never watched house but from what i know isn't part of the point that he's kind of a shitty person?

1. I use you in a more general way, rather than directly to the person I'm speaking with.
2. Crying still doesn't achieve anything. The thing you were crying about still happened. Take the time you wasted crying and fix the problem. If someone is burning in a house fire, I can waste time crying or I can call the fire department.
3. The point is that he may be a dick, but he saves people nobody else can. Because he uses logic and reasoning instead of "boo hoo boo hoo".

[Neu California]

For fun I googled toxic masculinity suicide and found all these results on the first page:

three scholarly articles:
Toxic Masculinity and Mental Health in Young Women: An Analysis of 13 Reasons Why (Toxic masculinity and female suicide)
The Problem With a Fight Against Toxic Masculinity (not really what the title makes it sound like and ties nicely into the topic and suicide)
Toxic Masculinity as a Barrier to Mental Health Treatment in Prison (article about how toxic masculinity makes it harder to get prisoners the mental health care they need)

Several other articles of various definitions:
1 in 5 men will not reach the age of 50 in the Americas, due to issues relating to toxic masculinity (Eeyup, study finds toxic masculinity is just that nasty)
Expressions of masculinity and associations with suicidal ideation among young males (Another study, this one finding that conformity to traits associated with toxic masculinity leads to higher rates of suicide ideation)
World Suicide Prevention Day: Why we should redefine masculinity (ties into the previous two links nicely)
Toxic masculinity may be quadrupling the suicide rate for Canadian men (As much as certain people call it a slur, it's actually a very real, and problematic, phenomenon)
Depression in Men: The Cycle of Toxic Masculinity (I relate especially to this article because of the bullying I underwent as a kid)
The Dangerous Effects of Toxic Masculinity (key quote: Men tend to keep so much bottled up inside. This includes all the traumas and heart-breaking moments. Eventually there has to be a release. And too often that is in an explosive way.)
New Research Provides Evidence Toxic Masculinity Leads to a Higher Risk of Suicide (eeyup. I suspect I actually linked to the study above, actually)
Suicide Nation: How ageism and toxic masculinity are killing our men (opinion piece, take it with as much salt as you need)
In Zimbabwe, Toxic Masculinity is Driving Male Suicide Rates (Another opinion piece)
New Research Provides Evidence Toxic Masculinity Leads to a Higher Risk of Suicide (Repost of the article three links up)

All of this was on the first page of a google search.

Also, since some new posts came up, I'd like to point out that crying helps as a way to help deal with trauma and challenges and setbacks, due to helping release emotions that are best not left to fester (Harvard)

[Galloism]

It’s amazing how casually all those people throw out widely recognized hateful bigoted language in their titles.

[Neu California]

It’s amazing how casually all those people throw out widely recognized hateful bigoted language in their titles.

[Galloism]

It’s amazing how casually all those people throw out widely recognized hateful bigoted language in their titles.

Edit: for those who didn't follow the link:

"Toxic masculinity" is insulting: 87.9% of men, 84.6% of women agree
"Toxic masculinity" may have a harmful impact on boys: 88.4% of men, 82.7% of women agree

I don’t think I have to explain how it’s specifically gendered, and how if you use specifically gendered insults how that’s sexist and bigoted.

[The Republic of Fore]

For fun I googled toxic masculinity suicide and found all these results on the first page:

three scholarly articles:
Toxic Masculinity and Mental Health in Young Women: An Analysis of 13 Reasons Why (Toxic masculinity and female suicide)
The Problem With a Fight Against Toxic Masculinity (not really what the title makes it sound like and ties nicely into the topic and suicide)
Toxic Masculinity as a Barrier to Mental Health Treatment in Prison (article about how toxic masculinity makes it harder to get prisoners the mental health care they need)

Several other articles of various definitions:
1 in 5 men will not reach the age of 50 in the Americas, due to issues relating to toxic masculinity (Eeyup, study finds toxic masculinity is just that nasty)
Expressions of masculinity and associations with suicidal ideation among young males (Another study, this one finding that conformity to traits associated with toxic masculinity leads to higher rates of suicide ideation)
World Suicide Prevention Day: Why we should redefine masculinity (ties into the previous two links nicely)
Toxic masculinity may be quadrupling the suicide rate for Canadian men (As much as certain people call it a slur, it's actually a very real, and problematic, phenomenon)
Depression in Men: The Cycle of Toxic Masculinity (I relate especially to this article because of the bullying I underwent as a kid)
The Dangerous Effects of Toxic Masculinity (key quote: Men tend to keep so much bottled up inside. This includes all the traumas and heart-breaking moments. Eventually there has to be a release. And too often that is in an explosive way.)
New Research Provides Evidence Toxic Masculinity Leads to a Higher Risk of Suicide (eeyup. I suspect I actually linked to the study above, actually)
Suicide Nation: How ageism and toxic masculinity are killing our men (opinion piece, take it with as much salt as you need)
In Zimbabwe, Toxic Masculinity is Driving Male Suicide Rates (Another opinion piece)
New Research Provides Evidence Toxic Masculinity Leads to a Higher Risk of Suicide (Repost of the article three links up)

All of this was on the first page of a google search.

Also, since some new posts came up, I'd like to point out that crying helps as a way to help deal with trauma and challenges and setbacks, due to helping release emotions that are best not left to fester (Harvard)

Sounds like they're just using masculinity as a scapegoat to me.

[Necroghastia]

So balance is important. The problem is our society doesn’t have it.

“Crying and whining all the time” is of course not a healthy or good approach. But neither is bottling it up inside until it manifests as a heart condition or a bullet to the head.

The problem is men are told to do the latter. This is not healthy and is actively harmful.

Nobody is forcing men to keep their emotions in. There's no gun to your head demanding that you never cry. If you can't cry because "society won't like it" then that's a personal issue.

Sounds more like a societal issue.

[Galloism]

Nobody is forcing men to keep their emotions in. There's no gun to your head demanding that you never cry. If you can't cry because "society won't like it" then that's a personal issue.

Sounds more like a societal issue.

It is. It’s called misandry, which is primarily inflicted by women, although men can do it too.

To wit:

What Brown also discovered in the course of her research is that, contrary to her early assumptions, men's shame is not primarily inflicted by other men. Instead, it is the women in their lives who tend to be repelled when men show the chinks in their armor.

"Most women pledge allegiance to this idea that women can explore their emotions, break down, fall apart—and it's healthy," Brown said. "But guys are not allowed to fall apart." Ironically, she explained, men are often pressured to open up and talk about their feelings, and they are criticized for being emotionally walled-off; but if they get too real, they are met with revulsion. She recalled the first time she realized that she had been complicit in the shaming: "Holy Shit!" she said. "I am the patriarchy!"

When men do it, it’s internalized misandry.

[Necroghastia]

For fun I googled toxic masculinity suicide and found all these results on the first page:

three scholarly articles:
Toxic Masculinity and Mental Health in Young Women: An Analysis of 13 Reasons Why (Toxic masculinity and female suicide)
The Problem With a Fight Against Toxic Masculinity (not really what the title makes it sound like and ties nicely into the topic and suicide)
Toxic Masculinity as a Barrier to Mental Health Treatment in Prison (article about how toxic masculinity makes it harder to get prisoners the mental health care they need)

Several other articles of various definitions:
1 in 5 men will not reach the age of 50 in the Americas, due to issues relating to toxic masculinity (Eeyup, study finds toxic masculinity is just that nasty)
Expressions of masculinity and associations with suicidal ideation among young males (Another study, this one finding that conformity to traits associated with toxic masculinity leads to higher rates of suicide ideation)
World Suicide Prevention Day: Why we should redefine masculinity (ties into the previous two links nicely)
Toxic masculinity may be quadrupling the suicide rate for Canadian men (As much as certain people call it a slur, it's actually a very real, and problematic, phenomenon)
Depression in Men: The Cycle of Toxic Masculinity (I relate especially to this article because of the bullying I underwent as a kid)
The Dangerous Effects of Toxic Masculinity (key quote: Men tend to keep so much bottled up inside. This includes all the traumas and heart-breaking moments. Eventually there has to be a release. And too often that is in an explosive way.)
New Research Provides Evidence Toxic Masculinity Leads to a Higher Risk of Suicide (eeyup. I suspect I actually linked to the study above, actually)
Suicide Nation: How ageism and toxic masculinity are killing our men (opinion piece, take it with as much salt as you need)
In Zimbabwe, Toxic Masculinity is Driving Male Suicide Rates (Another opinion piece)
New Research Provides Evidence Toxic Masculinity Leads to a Higher Risk of Suicide (Repost of the article three links up)

All of this was on the first page of a google search.

Also, since some new posts came up, I'd like to point out that crying helps as a way to help deal with trauma and challenges and setbacks, due to helping release emotions that are best not left to fester (Harvard)

Sounds like they're just using masculinity as a scapegoat to me.

Yes, that's the more or less the point of the phrase "toxic masculinity." Enforcement of an ideal of masculinity that isn't healthy and harms men, rather than an ideal of masculinity that is healthy.

[Neu California]

Edit: for those who didn't follow the link:

"Toxic masculinity" is insulting: 87.9% of men, 84.6% of women agree
"Toxic masculinity" may have a harmful impact on boys: 88.4% of men, 82.7% of women agree

I don’t think I have to explain how it’s specifically gendered, and how if you use specifically gendered insults how that’s sexist and bigoted.

And calling a well defined psychological and sociological concept a slur is, IMO, stupid. Just because it's considered insulting does not make it a slur.

[Krasny-Volny]

It is not the duty of the school to regulate the use of language in informal settings or settings outside the narrow classroom discussion of language as part of academia. The kids will say whatever they wish to say anyway.

I was raised in a Commonwealth country, going to a public school that was founded during the British colonial era and modelled very much, I imagine, after the public schools in the UK. We were all using what might be politely termed as "inappropriate language" by the third grade. Never in front of our instructors of course. But outside the classroom and the presence of the staff we said whatever we wanted, and would've resented attempts to control our behavior in these spaces which were our own.

I imagine the children in the UK affected by this new policy feel right the same.

[Galloism]

I don’t think I have to explain how it’s specifically gendered, and how if you use specifically gendered insults how that’s sexist and bigoted.

And calling a well defined psychological and sociological concept a slur is, IMO, stupid. Just because it's considered insulting does not make it a slur.

Again, supermajorities agree it’s insulting and likely harmful to children.

There’s a reason we don’t say “toxic femininity” or “toxic blackness” or anything of the sort. Everyone knows it’s an insulting gendered slur designed to blame the victims for their social oppression, and wouldn’t do it to any group they would be called on it for.

Yet the vast vast majority of people recognize it as insulting and harmful anyway.

Stop using insulting gendered slurs. You know better,