UK Politics Thread IX: Try turning the UK off and on again.

[Vassenor]

I got stabbed and acid attacked to day but i didnt get shot but i still want ye gun to defend merself so i dont get the stabbin

OK

[The Blaatschapen]

Widening inequality between children in North and rest of England, report finds

This is why we need to devolve the regions of England just like Wales and Scotland.

The UK government does not give 2 shits about the poor in the North of England.

Why would they? Don't they usually vote labour in the north?

[The Huskar Social Union]

Widening inequality between children in North and rest of England, report finds

This is why we need to devolve the regions of England just like Wales and Scotland.

The UK government does not give 2 shits about the poor in the North of England.

Why would they? Don't they usually vote labour in the north?

Considering a lot of those seats flipped to the Conservatives for the first time in decades in the last election you would think the Conservatives would be focusing on improving those constituencies and the situation there regarding access to services and inequality to keep them next time around. But currently there is a realistic chance a lot of those seats will flip back to Labour next election and the Conservatives have went back on multiple promises aimed at the north so maybe they decided "meh, got our Brexit majority dont care any more"

[The Huskar Social Union]

Seen Sinn Fein taking a lot of flak for the hunting ban they voted against yesterday with many people saying it goes against the party's stances in the Republic where they have said they would support a ban on fox hunting after the 2020 general election. Now ive not been able to find a source for them saying this but i have seen a quote from Mary Lou McDonald being shared a lot saying this, but again i cant find a source for it.

Seen people draw parallels with their stance on Abortion where recently in NI they abstained on an abortion bill in the Assembly despite days before hand criticising poor access to abortion services

Course im not really surprised if they are hypocrites regarding the subject. Ive always found the party to be a bit two-faced with how it approaches certain things and in general its time in government in NI.

[The Notorious Mad Jack]

I got stabbed and acid attacked to day but i didnt get shot but i still want ye gun to defend merself so i dont get the stabbin

Why are you making up a pretty serious crime?

[Arvenia]

I got stabbed and acid attacked to day but i didnt get shot but i still want ye gun to defend merself so i dont get the stabbin

WHO DID IT?!

[The Notorious Mad Jack]

I got stabbed and acid attacked to day but i didnt get shot but i still want ye gun to defend merself so i dont get the stabbin

WHO DID IT?!

No one did it - they're making it up. Look at their other posts.

[The Nihilistic view]

Widening inequality between children in North and rest of England, report finds

This is why we need to devolve the regions of England just like Wales and Scotland.

The UK government does not give 2 shits about the poor in the North of England.

How is 22% of children being too fat versus 20% at fucking 11 even a point? It's shocking everywhere.

[Arvenia]

WHO DID IT?!

No one did it - they're making it up. Look at their other posts.

I know they could be making it up, but I would still want to know whoever wants to attack them.

[Mtwara]

I'm not sure I agree with the concept of the "North of England". Counties like Northumberland and Cumbria would probably benefit more from being lumped in with the Scottish Borders. It is quite annoying to hear people go on about the "North West" when they really mean "that small area around Manchester and Liverpool".

What works to tackle inequality for those highly urbanised, densely populated areas won't work for the small towns and villages here.

[The New California Republic]

I'm not sure I agree with the concept of the "North of England". Counties like Northumberland and Cumbria would probably benefit more from being lumped in with the Scottish Borders.

...but then it wouldn't be "North of England", would it?

[The Blaatschapen]

I'm not sure I agree with the concept of the "North of England". Counties like Northumberland and Cumbria would probably benefit more from being lumped in with the Scottish Borders.

...but then it wouldn't be "North of England", would it?

North of England is basically everything north of of Watford *nods*

[Celritannia]

Widening inequality between children in North and rest of England, report finds

This is why we need to devolve the regions of England just like Wales and Scotland.

The UK government does not give 2 shits about the poor in the North of England.

How is 22% of children being too fat versus 20% at fucking 11 even a point? It's shocking everywhere.

Diverting the problem.
You would make a brilliant Tory Government Minister.

[The Archregimancy]

So, let's say that you find yourself in a situation where you might be meeting the Cabinet in the near future.

Do you:

1) Note to the Prime Minister that you have mutual friends [really] and invite yourself over for the next Downing Street Christmas party.

2) Act professionally throughout, because your personal feelings are immaterial given the importance of the occasion to your specific professional setting.

3) Act professionally most of the time, but allow yourself a sly Peppa Pig reference when chatting with the Prime Minister.

4) Fart in their general direction.

5) Other [please explain].

[Fartsniffage]

So, let's say that you find yourself in a situation where you might be meeting the Cabinet in the near future.

Do you:

1) Note to the Prime Minister that you have mutual friends [really] and invite yourself over for the next Downing Street Christmas party.

2) Act professionally throughout, because your personal feelings are immaterial given the importance of the occasion to your specific professional setting.

3) Act professionally most of the time, but allow yourself a sly Peppa Pig reference when chatting with the Prime Minister.

4) Fart in their general direction.

5) Other [please explain].

...do you really have to ask?

[Old Tyrannia]

So, let's say that you find yourself in a situation where you might be meeting the Cabinet in the near future.

Do you:

1) Note to the Prime Minister that you have mutual friends [really] and invite yourself over for the next Downing Street Christmas party.

2) Act professionally throughout, because your personal feelings are immaterial given the importance of the occasion to your specific professional setting.

3) Act professionally most of the time, but allow yourself a sly Peppa Pig reference when chatting with the Prime Minister.

4) Fart in their general direction.

5) Other [please explain].

Upon meeting them, it is absolutely essential to look puzzled, pull a screwdriver out of your pocket and remark that someone said something about a cabinet.

[The Blaatschapen]

2) Act professionally throughout, because your personal feelings are immaterial given the importance of the occasion to your specific professional setting.

This.

They'll decrease funding otherwise

[Ifreann]

So, let's say that you find yourself in a situation where you might be meeting the Cabinet in the near future.

Do you:

1) Note to the Prime Minister that you have mutual friends [really] and invite yourself over for the next Downing Street Christmas party.

2) Act professionally throughout, because your personal feelings are immaterial given the importance of the occasion to your specific professional setting.

3) Act professionally most of the time, but allow yourself a sly Peppa Pig reference when chatting with the Prime Minister.

4) Fart in their general direction.

5) Other [please explain].

See, 1) sounds funny, but then you might actually have to go, and what an awful thing to put yourself through.

[Imperial Old Mexico]

So, let's say that you find yourself in a situation where you might be meeting the Cabinet in the near future.

Do you:

1) Note to the Prime Minister that you have mutual friends [really] and invite yourself over for the next Downing Street Christmas party.

2) Act professionally throughout, because your personal feelings are immaterial given the importance of the occasion to your specific professional setting.

3) Act professionally most of the time, but allow yourself a sly Peppa Pig reference when chatting with the Prime Minister.

4) Fart in their general direction.

5) Other [please explain].

6. Threaten to "taunt them a second time."

[Chan Island]

So, let's say that you find yourself in a situation where you might be meeting the Cabinet in the near future.

Do you:

1) Note to the Prime Minister that you have mutual friends [really] and invite yourself over for the next Downing Street Christmas party.

2) Act professionally throughout, because your personal feelings are immaterial given the importance of the occasion to your specific professional setting.

3) Act professionally most of the time, but allow yourself a sly Peppa Pig reference when chatting with the Prime Minister.

4) Fart in their general direction.

5) Other [please explain].

6) Trust your instincts and just do what you've already been doing. It's gotten you this far so it can't be all bad.

[The Free Joy State]

So, let's say that you find yourself in a situation where you might be meeting the Cabinet in the near future.

Do you:

1) Note to the Prime Minister that you have mutual friends [really] and invite yourself over for the next Downing Street Christmas party.

2) Act professionally throughout, because your personal feelings are immaterial given the importance of the occasion to your specific professional setting.

3) Act professionally most of the time, but allow yourself a sly Peppa Pig reference when chatting with the Prime Minister.

4) Fart in their general direction.

5) Other [please explain].

Act professionally, because the meeting is important to your professional setting. Try to fart on them at some point during the meeting. Position yourself so they blame Gove.

[-Astoria-]

-snip-

Option 2, I guess.

[The Nihilistic view]

So, let's say that you find yourself in a situation where you might be meeting the Cabinet in the near future.

Do you:

1) Note to the Prime Minister that you have mutual friends [really] and invite yourself over for the next Downing Street Christmas party.

2) Act professionally throughout, because your personal feelings are immaterial given the importance of the occasion to your specific professional setting.

3) Act professionally most of the time, but allow yourself a sly Peppa Pig reference when chatting with the Prime Minister.

4) Fart in their general direction.

5) Other [please explain].

Obviously 3, he'll take it as a compliment and a bit of banter.

[Diahon]

but will he get the reference?

[The Archregimancy]

After the latest updates on the 2020 Downing Street Christmas Party, and having both reviewed all of the newspaper headlines and listened to Today on Radio 4, and additionally noting the reluctance of any government ministers to go on the record this morning as well as Sir Roger Gale's thinly veiled threat on Radio 4 that if the PM were to be found have deliberately misled Parliament then this should be considered a resignation issue, I would like to thank the Prime Minister for his sterling work over the last week and a half in promoting the Liberal Democrat campaign in the North Shropshire by-election.

However, I stress that - should the LibDems take the seat and I indeed find then myself meeting the Cabinet in the near future - I will remain reluctant to thank the Prime Minister in front of his Cabinet colleagues, just in case he finds the effusive praise embarrassing.