Have We Approached Autism Wrong?

[Rojava Free State]

I want to ask a question that I'm sure some of you have asked before, and it's based partially on experience. For some context, I've known several people with high functioning autism in my life and their experiences have made me feel a certain type of way about the condition. One person in particular who has had a rough time due to autism is my friend Peter, who I have known for a long time. Peter was diagnosed at age 4 with asperger's syndrome and in school had an IEP. The guy also had to attend a monthly "social skills" session where they gathered together kids with autism to teach them lame shit like "how to play with a friend." At age 17, after a particularly bad quarrel in Peter's broken (more like devastated) home, his mother threw him out onto the streets to fend for himself. He had only started his first job at Arby's a couple weeks prior and had next to no money, nowhere to go and only his phone and the clothes he was wearing. That and a phone charger was all he had. Literally nothing else. He spent six months homeless and eventually moved into a friend's house. Life wasn't easy at that time but nothing could compare to what happened the following year. Peter's mother went to court and got what was known as a guardianship contract with the state, claiming that Peter was autistic, could not care for himself and needed to be made a ward of the state for the rest of his life. He was taken by his mother from his friend's home to a group home and was not told where he was going until it was too late. For the last three years now, he has languished in a grouphome with an ex convict, a guy with down syndrome and "someone who screams."

There are many things that piss me off with this situation. For starters, his mom not only kicked him out, but then took the only thing he had left away from him, which was his freedom. Her claim that he is unable to care for himself is also ridiculous since Peter has aspergers and is basically a normal guy like you or me (well, except he's a shit rapper). But because of the label ascribed to him, he was shut away in a group home, potentially forever. This story comes after years of watching people I know be humiliated and treated in a patronizing manner by school officials and sometimes their own families because of their autism. Even when they can take care of themselves and live an otherwise normal life, they're treated like children by certain people. So I can't help but wonder if our society hasn't really educated itself on autism at all. Autism is a spectrum but the way people react to anyone who qas diagnosed, you would think every autistic person is rainman. Should we take a more hands off approach to those with high functioning autism? Is it possible that our current approach has done more harm than good? Have you as an individual been diagnosed with autism and what have your experiences been? How would you deal with mild autism/aspergers syndrome if you ran society?

[Katganistan]

Are there no outside agencies that can aid him, particularly after he reaches the age of majority?

[Rojava Free State]

Are there no outside agencies that can aid him, particularly after he reaches the age of majority?

I honestly don't know. I should bring it up with him, see what we can do.

[Katganistan]

Are there no outside agencies that can aid him, particularly after he reaches the age of majority?

I honestly don't know. I should bring it up with him, see what we can do.

It might be something to see if the ACLU can get in on, if social welfare agencies cannot.
Someone who can actually talk to and test him to see if he is able to care for himself, as well as testimony/affidavits from people who saw him able to care for himself, particularly the friend he was with, might help.

[Galloism]

I honestly don't know. I should bring it up with him, see what we can do.

It might be something to see if the ACLU can get in on, if social welfare agencies cannot.
Someone who can actually talk to and test him to see if he is able to care for himself, as well as testimony/affidavits from people who saw him able to care for himself, particularly the friend he was with, might help.

NCFM might also be willing to take his case if ACLU does not. Just giving you a backup plan.

Also, get those affidavits that Kat mentioned - the court will want to know that the previous order was based on a BS premise.

[Greed and Death]

This may be helpful for your friend.

https://www.autism-society.org/living-w ... resources/

I have sent a TG. I might be able to refer your friend to someone depending on where you live etc.

Edit: On the off chance OP has blocked me someone might want to reply to this so OP sees it. Or i guess Kat could double check that and let him know. Normally not one to get around blocking but there might be more pressing matters in this case.

[Mirjt]

Me and my brother have both been diagnosed with Asperger's (which was reclassified and merged with the diagnosis of high functioning autism a number of years ago). I can say that society has little understanding of autism (or most disabilities for that matter, especially the invisible disabilities). I used to be excited about more media representation for autism, but now I dread it because they almost always get the representation wrong, and even when they get it somewhat correctly they give the impression that everyone with autism will act that specific way (when researchers have already identified 16 fluid sub-patterns of symptoms in high functioning autism alone, and it does not represent how the symptoms can change with the age of the autistic individual). I will say that I support neurodiversity, and am against bullies like AutismSpeaks that claim to want to help autistic people, but really just stigmatize autistic people and advocate for eugenics against autistic people.

[Nuroblav]

I don't think I have been diagnosed but I'm pretty sure I have Asperger's - then again I wouldn't say that for definite. I do agree with you and Mirjt that so many people get it wrong.

[Rojava Free State]

This may be helpful for your friend.

https://www.autism-society.org/living-w ... resources/

I have sent a TG. I might be able to refer your friend to someone depending on where you live etc.

Edit: On the off chance OP has blocked me someone might want to reply to this so OP sees it. Or i guess Kat could double check that and let him know. Normally not one to get around blocking but there might be more pressing matters in this case.

I don't block anyone. I'll check

[Rojava Free State]

Me and my brother have both been diagnosed with Asperger's (which was reclassified and merged with the diagnosis of high functioning autism a number of years ago). I can say that society has little understanding of autism (or most disabilities for that matter, especially the invisible disabilities). I used to be excited about more media representation for autism, but now I dread it because they almost always get the representation wrong, and even when they get it somewhat correctly they give the impression that everyone with autism will act that specific way (when researchers have already identified 16 fluid sub-patterns of symptoms in high functioning autism alone, and it does not represent how the symptoms can change with the age of the autistic individual). I will say that I support neurodiversity, and am against bullies like AutismSpeaks that claim to want to help autistic people, but really just stigmatize autistic people and advocate for eugenics against autistic people.

Autism speaks commercials make autism look analogous to being mentally retarded.

[Ors Might]

Me and my brother have both been diagnosed with Asperger's (which was reclassified and merged with the diagnosis of high functioning autism a number of years ago). I can say that society has little understanding of autism (or most disabilities for that matter, especially the invisible disabilities). I used to be excited about more media representation for autism, but now I dread it because they almost always get the representation wrong, and even when they get it somewhat correctly they give the impression that everyone with autism will act that specific way (when researchers have already identified 16 fluid sub-patterns of symptoms in high functioning autism alone, and it does not represent how the symptoms can change with the age of the autistic individual). I will say that I support neurodiversity, and am against bullies like AutismSpeaks that claim to want to help autistic people, but really just stigmatize autistic people and advocate for eugenics against autistic people.

Autism speaks commercials make autism look analogous to being mentally retarded.

The most ironic part of Autism Speaks is that they fired one of, if not the only, remotely high ranking members of their organization with autism because he criticized how they represented autism.

[Costa Fierro]

Should we take a more hands off approach to those with high functioning autism?

No, if anything we need to be more hands on both for resources. Here in New Zealand there's very, very little support for people with autism. If you're high-functioning, it's virtually non-existent. The most you get in school and even then there's numerous cases of abuse, exploitation, forced exclusion, etc. This became news merely four days ago.

Autism from my perspective is one of those "final frontiers" when it comes to disability advocacy and social justice, in the sense that we're just starting to see some genuine representation of people with autism in media, but those examples are few and far between. In mainstream society the awareness and perceptions of autism are, I guess still in their development phase simply because people like us are so few and far between, and that because of how few we are, most people simply don't know how to interact with us, how to make us feel comfortable etc., hence the significant social and economic problems we face. It is changing, but it is changing slowly.

In terms of my personal experiences it's been a real mixed bag. Pretty much until the last three years of high school I was bullied and mistreated by teachers and by students. Locked in offices, forced exclusion, kicked, shoved, punched, stabbed on a couple of occasions. My primary school didn't want anything to do with me in terms of actual support despite my mother almost begging them to do something but some of the staff there did end up giving me some support once they understood what was happening. The middle school (intermediate here) did nothing to help me either and we didn't even bother doing anything with the high school but it was more or less sorted out by the time high school finished.

Since then I've been unemployed for almost a decade. I'm not alone in this respect, less than ten percent of people with autism in New Zealand are in full time employment, and one of the reasons why I am unemployed is my fear that I'll be abused or exploited by others because I've had authority figures engage in some kind of abuse before, not to mention older New Zealanders have a tendency to be extremely set in their ways and people like me are more of a liability. I've tried looking for a job and ended up doing volunteer work, but a lot of introspection has led me to believe that I'm simply not cut out for the working world. Ditto any kind of intimate relationship, again, not without a lack of trying.

I like to think that I'm fortunate enough that I've had a very supportive mother but even she sometimes can't understand why we do things the way we do them. I've also liked to think that my experiences are probably actually not that bad by comparison. But in many respects I do sometimes feel invisible and I've always had this perception of looking into society from the outside rather than being in society. I also experienced a change in perception last year when TVNZ did two series of people who had survived some absolutely horrific abuse or who were facing challenges in terms of disabilities or suffering from social discrimination. They had people who had been abused in state care, people who had suffered brain injuries, people who were physically disabled, refugees, domestic violence survivors, and one episode exploring someone who was transgender. Then out of the blue, they had an episode about someone who has Asperger's. And to me, it hit home just how difficult life can be for people like me, and that if anything it's a vastly more significant challenge to act and live as a functional human being in society simply because of how my brain works. Which helped me somewhat because my mental state and self esteem was on a downward spiral.

To be honest as much as people are impressed by my ability to pull random facts or answers from nowhere, or to pickup and retain information, it still doesn't really negate the massive differences in social perception, and to be frank I wish it never existed. Partly that's why I don't want a family or a relationship: I'm not suited for that, any kids I have would most certainly have it, and I'd rather be able to be myself by myself than have to try and keep up appearances.