So... the other day I claimed that people were arseholes if they didn't advise someone of the folly of an expensive course of action.
Imagine, for example, that you know that all open job vacancies are filled already when Bob comes up to you and says, "Should I spend $200 to make the application to the job?" If you don't tell Bob the jobs are closed off, you're basically stealing $200 from him. In this example, I think it's pretty clear that you'd be an arsehole if you didn't dissuade Bob from that course of action.
More realistically, of course, you're just going to know that pursuing a certain path will be difficult. I mean, conceivably a short person could play for the NBA but it's not impossible and there are a number of, at least, average heighted dudes in it at the moment. And then there's the general unlikelihood someone makes it as a professional athlete anyway, quite aside from the height thing.
I still think things are pretty cut and dried at this point. But, what if we add in the dream/hope killing dimension? For example... say some random internet person says "I really want to go to uni, but I think I might have failed this exam I really need." What do you do there?
Obviously the ethics of advice change a lot depending on what your advice is. Say, you believe there's nothing meaningful in "but I think I might have failed this exam" except the obvious "I need to know about the other pathways". It seems hard to see an ethical problem here... unless the advice is illegal. Just tell the rando that they can look into a make-up programme or something. But what if you think people who are unsure that they'll be admitted, when getting in is easy, aren't cut out for uni? Going through with the process might well cause them to accrue tens of thousands in debt (and not necessarily interest free debt). Now... to follow the "don't be an arsehole" logic you're kinda being asked to jump into a conversation and kill dreams. Doesn't that seem... off, too?
Similarly, it's quite different if you're talking about something and then you're asked the same question directly. Naturally, you'd try and ease the process (so, not "give up, uni's not for you"... perhaps more like, "look, I have to be honest, I don't really think marginal secondary school results translate into success at university") but because you're a pre-existing voice the asker really ought to be conscious that they might get an unfavourable answer.
So... what say ye, NSG? Are there certain rules you follow when it comes to telling people hard "truths"?
