NationStates

Inspired by this post right here as well as this one. I bring to you another dating thread! Fun fun, joy joy.

It's no secret. Dating, relationships, and even sex are at an all time low in the developed world. Some people are putting their careers or schooling first before relationships, some areas just don't have a good work/life balance, some of it's cultural, and some economical. Any way you explain it, relationships and birthrates have been dropping in the developed world, and it doesn't seem like there's going to be a bounce-back anytime soon. The reasons however, do vary by area. In Asia it's usually because of a terrible work/life balance, in North America it's usually because of economic problems, etc...

So, that bring us to the topic(s) of the thread: How is dating culture where you're from? What do you think is the cause of this drastic drop in relationships? Do you even want to date, and why and why not?

Personally, I'm not dating anyone ATM, nor have I ever. I'm too focused on school and finding a job, don't have enough money, and quite frankly, no one's shown interest. It doesn't bother me much though, as I have more important things to be working on right now.

Source. Also, as a side note, the name "igeneration" sucks.

I blame social media and smartphones. It has a huge impact on how we spending our days, now glued to our microscreens. I tried to dodge this trend but I am afraid its catching up with me too.

Smart phones and the net have made dating complicated. Approaching a stranger in a public space is typically viewed with suspicion and heaven forbid you ask for someone's number.

On the converse getting a feeling on if a person is safe over the internet can be difficult making meeting in person difficult.

I haven't really noticed a lack of dating. When I was a teen, I dated. So did most of my friends and most of them still do. Maybe we're outliers. I know I am in one respect, I got married much younger than most people do now.

Not shocking. Everyone today is anti-social and glued to their phones.

I don’t seek out dates because I have too little time on my hands. If a guy wants to ask, I probably would give him a chance, assuming I don’t get creep vibes, but I get how that’s difficult for people, as a socially anxious person myself.

Scomagia wrote:I haven't really noticed a lack of dating. When I was a teen, I dated. So did most of my friends and most of them still do. Maybe we're outliers. I know I am in one respect, I got married much younger than most people do now.

Breeder *points* *unleashes screech*

Tbh, I wouldn’t really know what the dating scene is in my area since I’ve since removed myself from the dating scene for the past 7 and a half years or so, but not for the listed economic, cultural, work related reasons, primarily because (likely due to my mental illnesses) I have an exceedingly difficult time trusting anyone to the point of opening myself to them to allow dating to happen.

Tinder (hedonism in general) made dating obsolete. Add in the rise of Meninism and reports of women only dating for free food, and you got the answer to your question.

Jean-Paul Sartre wrote:I don’t seek out dates because I have too little time on my hands. If a guy wants to ask, I probably would give him a chance, assuming I don’t get creep vibes, but I get how that’s difficult for people, as a socially anxious person myself.

So are you a girl because if you are, that would be kinda weird considering we all called you John Paul.

Not an issue, just kinda ironic

Scomagia wrote:I haven't really noticed a lack of dating. When I was a teen, I dated. So did most of my friends and most of them still do. Maybe we're outliers. I know I am in one respect, I got married much younger than most people do now.

I only knew 2 people in my HS friend group who dated, and they were dating each other...

The decline of social values and expectations, part of a wider trend in our degenerating culture mixed with recent technological innovations are at the root of the problem. Bad economics and an uncaring elite or, perhaps, a deliberately evil one aid and abet this process.

Jean-Paul Sartre wrote:I don’t seek out dates because I have too little time on my hands. If a guy wants to ask, I probably would give him a chance, assuming I don’t get creep vibes, but I get how that’s difficult for people, as a socially anxious person myself.

Now your name makes sense.

I had a fiancee up till about two months ago in June when she randomly called off our engagement and separated from me, proceeding to go out with a guy who looks like a damn mall mannequin. My friend Tyler told me the news about the "new guy" and it did more of a number on me than anyone could imagine.

I think I'm just gonna go back to how I was in highschool. Screw monogamy, marriage, or any social norms. I'm done with that garbage. There's no way at this point im ever getting married because I can only imagine if I had actually married my last girlfriend and then everything fell through. I'm currently single and don't know when I'm gonna have a girlfriend or even random friend with benefits again. I really don't know what the future holds for me

I find myself agreeing with Nakena, G&D, and WRA. I'd also throw in the mine field of the issue of being falsely accused of rape or other things when the relationship goes south and one seeks revenge on the other, for the most part young men don't want the possibility of that being foisted upon them.

That’s shocking. I’ve always thought people were eager to find love trough dating, or at least a one-night stand. That seemed to be the norm, but going by this report, that’s not happening much.

Like everyone else on this thread, I’d blame it on the growing use of handphones and non-romantically related social mixups. They seem to be excluding out love now.

In my area, I’ve noticed that some boys spend time with a girl a lot, but never do anything more than that. They just talk when they see each other. And any meetups outside of school are mixed with friends, so it’s not a date. Shocking now I see it.

Everyone has stated it before but it really is the tech.

Everyone sits at a chair, craned over their computer screen, withering away thinking all day. Then they get off work and either spend time on their phone, computer or idiot box the rest of the time.

A very learned but inexperienced generation. Tech anymore is seeming to create as many pathologies as it helps. Especially now with bioengineering, endocrine disrupting compounds in the environment, etc.

I blame the parents..

Rojava Free State wrote:

Jean-Paul Sartre wrote:I don’t seek out dates because I have too little time on my hands. If a guy wants to ask, I probably would give him a chance, assuming I don’t get creep vibes, but I get how that’s difficult for people, as a socially anxious person myself.

So are you a girl because if you are, that would be kinda weird considering we all called you John Paul.

Not an issue, just kinda ironic

I mean, I tend to assume that my fellow NSers are "ageless, faceless, gender-neutral, culturally ambiguous NationStates people" unless otherwise stated.

As to the thread topic, I refuse to date because philosophically speaking I view the desire of eros as fundamentally and thoroughly wack, to say the least.

There's next to no incentive to date these days. Marriage is dead, and hook-up culture is here to stay. Combine that with anti-social behaviors, paranoia, disdain for the opposite sex, and general anger and no one can wonder people don't want to mingle anymore.

Flaxxony wrote:Everyone has stated it before but it really is the tech.

Everyone sits at a chair, craned over their computer screen, withering away thinking all day. Then they get off work and either spend time on their phone, computer or idiot box the rest of the time.

A very learned but inexperienced generation. Tech anymore is seeming to create as many pathologies as it helps. Especially now with bioengineering, endocrine disrupting compounds in the environment, etc.

What about areas like East Asia? Who have these falling rates due to work/life balance.

Economically, it's just not feasible in areas like that, and that's starting to leak out in places like the US and Canada, where you're expected to be on call at all times for your company.

Bombadil wrote:I blame the parents..

I blame Melkor.

Grinning Dragon wrote:I find myself agreeing with Nakena, G&D, and WRA. I'd also throw in the mine field of the issue of being falsely accused of rape or other things when the relationship goes south and one seeks revenge on the other, for the most part young men don't want the possibility of that being foisted upon them.

This is a major reason why I wanna keep any future partners at arm's length. I'm looking for sexual relationships, not romance. That romance crap is a lie for the most part and most relationships collapse because people are stubborn and don't try to understand. Since I'm not in the mood to ever get that hurt again, I'm waving my hand and saying nah to anything serious

Farnhamia wrote:

Bombadil wrote:I blame the parents..

I blame Melkor.

Who's this "Melkor" you speak of? I only know of Margoth.

Rojava Free State wrote:

Grinning Dragon wrote:I find myself agreeing with Nakena, G&D, and WRA. I'd also throw in the mine field of the issue of being falsely accused of rape or other things when the relationship goes south and one seeks revenge on the other, for the most part young men don't want the possibility of that being foisted upon them.

This is a major reason why I wanna keep any future partners at arm's length. I'm looking for sexual relationships, not romance. That romance crap is a lie for the most part and most relationships collapse because people are stubborn and don't try to understand. Since I'm not in the mood to ever get that hurt again, I'm waving my hand and saying nah to anything serious

Sex numbs people.