Dating is at a Record Low: Another Dating Thread

[First American Empire]

Or to put it in a different manner: who would you want a friendship with? The person whom you feel most at ease with, or the one that you feel like having to meet certain expectations all the time? If I had the choice, I would choose the former.

I feel at ease with most women. If you feel under pressure to comform to their expectations, it's probably because you're trying too hard be attractive enough for them to want to sleep with you, but if you're not trying to have a relationship with them that's too deep; but are merely open to different possibilities with them- it's different.

What you need is a tomboy. A woman who is just like one of the guys in terms of personality. I have one such woman as a Discord pen pal but problem is- she's Black. I've known her for too long however, and she's told me that she wouldn't mind having sex with me purely for fun. She's an adventurous spirit that likes to try new things. She likes to tease me that I'm not quite man enough to want to "go all the way" and when I agreed to that assessment to try to stop her interest in me, she replied that maybe one of those days she could tempt me enough for something to happen.

She's cool to talk to, just that because she's Black- she should be devoted to just Black men in my mind, and that she's a bit sexually loose. I'm fairly certain she practices safe sex however. She has a virgin fetish and I happen to be one. If she were to visit me in person, I can't guarantee that she wouldn't be able to break me- but I'd do my very best to keep anything between us chaste. It'd be cool to hang out with her, but I also fear what she could try to pull- if she were too forward with me in person.

She doesn't want a romance thing with me strictly speaking, but probably does want me to be a friend with benefits.

Uh... this sounds a lot like my wife. Does she have an incomprehensible Polish last name? (My wife took my last name despite my repeated warnings that nobody can pronounce it.)

[Saiwania]

Uh... this sounds a lot like my wife. Does she have an incomprehensible Polish last name? (My wife took my last name despite my repeated warnings that nobody can pronounce it.)

She is not married. As fun as it might be to take up her offer, she could really screw me over and troll me if I got her pregnant. Although she probably wouldn't want any child support from me, she's well off. I can't be careless about that sort of thing. It is important to me that I father only White children or none at all. Nothing wrong with her physically, just my own inhibitions and paranoia about what could happen. If I have to deny myself oh well. A Black woman should be with a Black man in my view. She unfortunately doesn't care, she relishes going after whatever strikes her fancy if there is an opportunity. I don't think she's overly liberal however, so she can understand where I'm coming from. But it wouldn't stop her from trying, so far as I can tell.

[Costa Fierro]

The two are not mutually exclusive.

I'm not saying you can't, I'm saying you shouldn't.

Yes a friendship with a woman, may, on average be different than a friendship with a man, that does not mean different is also valueless.

If there is clear benefits to one and not the other, why should the one with no benefits be considered?

By your logic if the majority of people vote for party A, party B cannot exist.

That's not the logic at all. It's rather if Party A is clearly demonstrated to have delivered things that benefit you directly, and Party B does not, why consider voting for Party B?

It is not just this issue. For example you could not process that just because on average countries with a higher birth rate are poorer, that in many cases richer countries still have higher birthrates.

Could not process?

[Thepeopl]

The two are not mutually exclusive.

I'm not saying you can't, I'm saying you shouldn't.

Yes a friendship with a woman, may, on average be different than a friendship with a man, that does not mean different is also valueless.

If there is clear benefits to one and not the other, why should the one with no benefits be considered?

By your logic if the majority of people vote for party A, party B cannot exist.

That's not the logic at all. It's rather if Party A is clearly demonstrated to have delivered things that benefit you directly, and Party B does not, why consider voting for Party B?

It is not just this issue. For example you could not process that just because on average countries with a higher birth rate are poorer, that in many cases richer countries still have higher birthrates.

Could not process?

Ok, just curious .

Do you go shopping with your male friends?
Do you go to the spa with your mates?
Do you give eachother massages?

We (spouse and me) did do this before we got romantically involved. It was all strict platonic.

FYI: if both parties do not benefit from a friendship, it is not a friendship. It is than a dependent system kinda like a parasite.

[First American Empire]

Uh... this sounds a lot like my wife. Does she have an incomprehensible Polish last name? (My wife took my last name despite my repeated warnings that nobody can pronounce it.)

She is not married. As fun as it might be to take up her offer, she could really screw me over and troll me if I got her pregnant. Although she probably wouldn't want any child support from me, she's well off. I can't be careless about that sort of thing. It is important to me that I father only White children or none at all. Nothing wrong with her physically, just my own inhibitions and paranoia about what could happen. If I have to deny myself oh well. A Black woman should be with a Black man in my view. She unfortunately doesn't care, she relishes going after whatever strikes her fancy if there is an opportunity. I don't think she's overly liberal however, so she can understand where I'm coming from. But it wouldn't stop her from trying, so far as I can tell.

It's definitely not her then.

[LimaUniformNovemberAlpha]

[Do you go shopping with your male friends?
Do you go to the spa with your mates?
Do you give eachother massages?

We (spouse and me) did do this before we got romantically involved. It was all strict platonic.

I... find it hard to believe he would still consider it "platonic" when it's to the point of going to the spa with a woman. That would be considered too intimate for males to do together without it being considered gay. Assuming males without girlfriends even go to the spa in the first place.

[Technoscience Leftwing]

A decrease in the number of acquaintances, a decrease in marriages and the population is a concern for those who see themselves as ruler and exploiter, and see the mass of the population as their labor or military resources. That is, this is the problem of the ruling elite, the ruling class - rulers need workers and soldiers.

We do not belong to the ruling class, to presidents and billionaires. Therefore, from the point of view of ordinary people, acquaintance and childbearing are everyone’s free choices, this cannot be forced. In all likelihood, a drop in the level of acquaintances and fertility is associated with a loss of optimism. There was no justice and comfort in an agricultural society - but people hoped for an afterlife paradise. With the development of science, religion has lost its position, and most people no longer believe in this paradise. There was also hope for an earthly paradise - a combination of high technology with an egalitarian universal free access to welfare and comfort. The degradation and defeat of the communist project undermined this optimism. There was a sense of hopelessness, against the background of sharp social inequality, exhaustion of natural resources, environmental problems, wars, the dictatorship of corporations or state bureaucracy. Hence the rejection of marriage and childbearing by people: they feel that the system is unfair and unpromising, but they cannot replace it. They are right in their disappointment.

[Thepeopl]

[Do you go shopping with your male friends?
Do you go to the spa with your mates?
Do you give eachother massages?

We (spouse and me) did do this before we got romantically involved. It was all strict platonic.

I... find it hard to believe he would still consider it "platonic" when it's to the point of going to the spa with a woman. That would be considered too intimate for males to do together without it being considered gay. Assuming males without girlfriends even go to the spa in the first place.

It was 3 boys and 1 girl. She had invited the boys and everyone had a nice relaxing time. Completely platonic. We all helped eachother scrub with salt.

None of us is gay, but we don't mind platonic physical contact, like massages or scrubs. FYI we only scrubbed the back.

But you go shopping with your mates and give eachother massages, good for you.

[Costa Fierro]

Ok, just curious .

Do you go shopping with your male friends?
Do you go to the spa with your mates?
Do you give eachother massages?

We (spouse and me) did do this before we got romantically involved. It was all strict platonic.

FYI: if both parties do not benefit from a friendship, it is not a friendship. It is than a dependent system kinda like a parasite.

Ah yes, because a spa experience is better than having the ability to be open with your friend.

[Saiwania]

I'd say a spa isn't an appropriate activity for a man. It is inherently feminine, it is meant for the ladies to do their hair, make up, and etc. You don't want to be doing your nails or whatever if you're a male, people will think "you ain't right" in the words of Hank Hill. This is different than for example, hot springs. If it is a uniquely Japanese activity, it is obviously appropriate for them to utilize that sort of thing in their country. Just be sure to learn and follow all of their norms before attempting it if you're from overseas.

[Felt Karpit]

I'd say a spa isn't an appropriate activity for a man. It is inherently feminine, it is meant for the ladies to do their hair, make up, and etc. You don't want to be doing your nails or whatever if you're a male, people will think "you ain't right" in the words of Hank Hill. This is different than for example, hot springs. If it is a uniquely Japanese activity, it is obviously appropriate for them to utilize that sort of thing in their country. Just be sure to learn and follow all of their norms before attempting it if you're from overseas.

Or we could just do what we enjoy and not limit ourselves based on arbitrary gender norms?

[Thepeopl]

Ok, just curious .

Do you go shopping with your male friends?
Do you go to the spa with your mates?
Do you give eachother massages?

We (spouse and me) did do this before we got romantically involved. It was all strict platonic.

FYI: if both parties do not benefit from a friendship, it is not a friendship. It is than a dependent system kinda like a parasite.

Ah yes, because a spa experience is better than having the ability to be open with your friend.

Yes, you are all naked. You talk about death, love, family, dreams with out shame because everyone is vulnerable there. And in the spa, in Dutch they are called wellness centres, you can opt for facials, rasul treatments or just lipfish nibbling on your toes. But I d say 60 % is female, 40 % male. And yes it is completely acceptable for males to go to the sauna together.
If you have the sauna just for yourselves, you can talk privately about the universe or your preferences.
There is no aspect of lust involved in a spa day, the goal is to relax and recharge.

[Ethel mermania]

I'd say a spa isn't an appropriate activity for a man. It is inherently feminine, it is meant for the ladies to do their hair, make up, and etc. You don't want to be doing your nails or whatever if you're a male, people will think "you ain't right" in the words of Hank Hill. This is different than for example, hot springs. If it is a uniquely Japanese activity, it is obviously appropriate for them to utilize that sort of thing in their country. Just be sure to learn and follow all of their norms before attempting it if you're from overseas.

My experience suggests you may want to rethink your position on this.

I had a couple surgeries recently and couldn't do things like cut my toenails so I went for a spa mani-peddie. First off it felt great, a couple cute women massaging your feet and hands is not a bad thing. and secondly I got 2 unsolicited phone #'s from women I was chatting up in the spa. If I were not married I would have taken both women up on their offers for me to call. I was not trying.

[Thepeopl]

I'd say a spa isn't an appropriate activity for a man. It is inherently feminine, it is meant for the ladies to do their hair, make up, and etc. You don't want to be doing your nails or whatever if you're a male, people will think "you ain't right" in the words of Hank Hill. This is different than for example, hot springs. If it is a uniquely Japanese activity, it is obviously appropriate for them to utilize that sort of thing in their country. Just be sure to learn and follow all of their norms before attempting it if you're from overseas.

My experience suggests you may want to rethink your position on this.

I had a couple surgeries recently and couldn't do things like cut my toenails so I went for a spa mani-peddie. First off it felt great, a couple cute women massaging your feet and hands is not a bad thing. and secondly I got 2 unsolicited phone #'s from women I was chatting up in the spa. If I were not married I would have taken both women up on their offers for me to call. I was not trying.

What are you doing? Totes undermines my case, no lust involved. Unless you're Ethel Mermania, than women will throw their phone numbers at you.

https://youtu.be/fWNaR-rxAic

[Ethel mermania]

My experience suggests you may want to rethink your position on this.

I had a couple surgeries recently and couldn't do things like cut my toenails so I went for a spa mani-peddie. First off it felt great, a couple cute women massaging your feet and hands is not a bad thing. and secondly I got 2 unsolicited phone #'s from women I was chatting up in the spa. If I were not married I would have taken both women up on their offers for me to call. I was not trying.

What are you doing? Totes undermines my case, no lust involved. Unless you're Ethel Mermania, than women will throw their phone numbers at you.

https://youtu.be/fWNaR-rxAic

Well this is me and my crewe

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=OPf0YbXqDm0

[Thepeopl]

What are you doing? Totes undermines my case, no lust involved. Unless you're Ethel Mermania, than women will throw their phone numbers at you.

https://youtu.be/fWNaR-rxAic

Well this is me and my crewe

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=OPf0YbXqDm0

You wanna have a spa day? Taking with us all boys who wanna get laid. Teach them how to chat with the girls and not being embarrassed by being naked. (In the restaurant, you are required to wear a towel . Most wellness centres ask you to wear your bathrobe in the
Restaurant. )
You just solved the low dating crisis.

[Ethel mermania]

Well this is me and my crewe

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=OPf0YbXqDm0

You wanna have a spa day? Taking with us all boys who wanna get laid. Teach them how to chat with the girls and not being embarrassed by being naked. (In the restaurant, you are required to wear a towel . Most wellness centres ask you to wear your bathrobe in the
Restaurant. )
You just solved the low dating crisis.

On this site, that would be the impossible dream.

[Saiwania]

Or we could just do what we enjoy and not limit ourselves based on arbitrary gender norms?

No, tradition and gender roles are everything to a society. Without those enforced, there is just chaos. Although there are different degrees of severity for breaking these norms. For example, I'd consider a boy being into fashion as being better than them crossdressing. In the first situation, there should be concern that they might be gay, while in the latter scenario- they should be punished.

[The Huskar Social Union]

Or we could just do what we enjoy and not limit ourselves based on arbitrary gender norms?

No, tradition and gender roles are everything to a society. Without those enforced, there is just chaos. Although there are different degrees of severity for breaking these norms. For example, I'd consider a boy being into fashion as being better than them crossdressing. In the first situation, there should be concern that they might be gay, while in the latter scenario- they should be punished.

They are fucking stupid ass bollocks.

Also

"Concern they might be gay" WHO THE FUCK CARES IF THEY ARE OR NOT?

Also how you gona punish someone for cross dressing? Throw them in a gas chamber perhaps?

[Kowani]

Or we could just do what we enjoy and not limit ourselves based on arbitrary gender norms?

No, tradition and gender roles are everything to a society. Without those enforced, there is just chaos. Although there are different degrees of severity for breaking these norms. For example, I'd consider a boy being into fashion as being better than them crossdressing. In the first situation, there should be concern that they might be gay, while in the latter scenario- they should be punished.

Ignoring the fact that gender roles change over time, chaos isn’t inherently negative.

[Ethel mermania]

No, tradition and gender roles are everything to a society. Without those enforced, there is just chaos. Although there are different degrees of severity for breaking these norms. For example, I'd consider a boy being into fashion as being better than them crossdressing. In the first situation, there should be concern that they might be gay, while in the latter scenario- they should be punished.

They are fucking stupid ass bollocks.

Also

"Concern they might be gay" WHO THE FUCK CARES IF THEY ARE OR NOT?

Also how you gona punish someone for cross dressing? Throw them in a gas chamber perhaps?

Make them wear stripes with plaid.

[Socialist Heronia]

Not sure if I'm missing a lot of loners, but I do see plenty of boys and girls pairing up around here.

Although I'd be following this trend, since I'm just not interested in dating or romance on a conscious and decision-making level.

Other way around here. Any people that know each other on this forum (and NS in general) appear to ave a purely platonic relationship. Similarly, not sure what I'm missing.

[Socialist Heronia]

Uh... this sounds a lot like my wife. Does she have an incomprehensible Polish last name? (My wife took my last name despite my repeated warnings that nobody can pronounce it.)

She is not married. As fun as it might be to take up her offer, she could really screw me over and troll me if I got her pregnant. Although she probably wouldn't want any child support from me, she's well off. I can't be careless about that sort of thing. It is important to me that I father only White children or none at all. Nothing wrong with her physically, just my own inhibitions and paranoia about what could happen. If I have to deny myself oh well. A Black woman should be with a Black man in my view. She unfortunately doesn't care, she relishes going after whatever strikes her fancy if there is an opportunity. I don't think she's overly liberal however, so she can understand where I'm coming from. But it wouldn't stop her from trying, so far as I can tell.

Nice to see Nanatsu was right.
In other topics, if you want to reject people based on something they can't change, that's your call.

[Crockerland]

Or we could just do what we enjoy and not limit ourselves based on arbitrary gender norms?

No, tradition and gender roles are everything to a society. Without those enforced, there is just chaos. Although there are different degrees of severity for breaking these norms. For example, I'd consider a boy being into fashion as being better than them crossdressing. In the first situation, there should be concern that they might be gay, while in the latter scenario- they should be punished.

I'm the forever alone sort.

Can't imagine why.

[LimaUniformNovemberAlpha]

I... find it hard to believe he would still consider it "platonic" when it's to the point of going to the spa with a woman. That would be considered too intimate for males to do together without it being considered gay. Assuming males without girlfriends even go to the spa in the first place.

It was 3 boys and 1 girl. She had invited the boys and everyone had a nice relaxing time. Completely platonic. We all helped eachother scrub with salt.

None of us is gay, but we don't mind platonic physical contact, like massages or scrubs. FYI we only scrubbed the back.

But you go shopping with your mates and give eachother massages, good for you.

I assumed you meant massages in the context of a spa, as I intended for the same point to apply. Going to the spa with someone, and/or being massauged by them, sounds very intimate. You've since mentioned this was Dutch, so maybe the Netherlands has different norms than Canada.

As for shopping, it depends on what you're shopping for. Grocery shopping is the kind of thing for which people benefit from each other's thoughts.

No, tradition and gender roles are everything to a society. Without those enforced, there is just chaos. Although there are different degrees of severity for breaking these norms. For example, I'd consider a boy being into fashion as being better than them crossdressing. In the first situation, there should be concern that they might be gay, while in the latter scenario- they should be punished.

I'm the forever alone sort.

Can't imagine why.

I honestly hope that isn't the reason. Ideas like his should be deterred by counter-argument, not social isolation.