Alpha-Betas: Do they exist?

[Nanatsu no Tsuki]

I have never seen gender as the deciding factor in how much people give a shit about my woes, rather how well I know the person. Like, if my friend I know well and hang out with etc tells me they're going through some rough shit, I'm all ears.

If the dude next to me on the bus starts telling me all about how their life sucks, I might become really interesting in my phone.

Fair, but there’s a trend here.

Not that men don’t enforce, they do, but primary enforcers are women, which makes sense as they also have the majority of social power. So telling men to stop enforcing the male gender role is good, but misses the majority of the problem.

Men, by and large, would love to shed the male gender role. Hell, some even engaging in bromances just to avoid enforcement of it. Like literally that was the reasoning given.

We need to tell women to stop forcing it on them.

Speaking from a woman’s perspective and from only my personal experience, women can be highly critical and brutally so of other women. To the point of interring scathing remarks at the slightest provocation. Or at least that has been my personal experience.

There’s a reason I don’t have close cisgender female friends (I do have close trans women friends) and why I prefer to hang out with guys, heterosexual or gay.

[Ostroeuropa]

Glad to hear that. What kind of people would you want to hang out with anyway, if you could?

People who talk about international relations, history, and philosophy, especially ethical philosophy.

Yeah I can see how that'd be difficult. Often you gotta look a bit broader and just look for open minded and friendly people. Like, my current partner knew next to nothing about politics except a vague sense that the Tories were bad people because everyone talked about Thatcher just before spitting on the ground. But she DID know a lot about other shit, even shit I thought I knew a lot about before meeting her. Interacting has meant we discuss those things anyway because she cares about me and is interested in me, and so she's learning. Meanwhile, i'm learning too.

It could be similar for you, if you cast your net a little wider and just have some patience, find some kind people and hang out with them, you'll get to discuss stuff and all that. People like learning, they like to hear new things. Networking is also important, they might introduce you to people with similar interests themselves.

You'd be surprised how far you can get by being a good listener, caring about people, and so on, and not even necessarily having anything interesting yourself to talk about. I made a lot of friends being that way, and I bet you if you asked them to name 20 facts about me they wouldn't be able to do it. (Mostly because "What are you into? would be; "Ponies and politics.", which goes down as well as you'd expect, and those are probably the most normie things about me.) You don't need to worry so much about being perceived as boring, just be perceptive and ask people about themselves and so on, pay attention, keep track of shit. It doesn't actually matter if you don't have anything to talk about. Nor do they a lot of the time beyond "I have a job and it was shit.". Your contribution can be "What was shit about it?" rather than "I don't have a job. I do nothing.".

I dunno man. I'd suggest you just find kind people and hang out with them. They will help you and take an interest regardless. Even people who don't talk about those topics off the bat might know things about them, or have an opinion.

That's one reason I don't buy into these alpha/beta stuff much.

[United Muscovite Nations]

People who talk about international relations, history, and philosophy, especially ethical philosophy.

Yeah I can see how that'd be difficult. Often you gotta look a bit broader and just look for open minded and friendly people. Like, my current partner knew next to nothing about politics except a vague sense that the Tories were bad people because everyone talked about Thatcher just before spitting on the ground. But she DID know a lot about other shit, even shit I thought I knew a lot about before meeting her. Interacting has meant we discuss those things anyway because she cares about me and is interested in me, and so she's learning. Meanwhile, i'm learning too.

It could be similar for you, if you cast your net a little wider and just have some patience, find some kind people and hang out with them, you'll get to discuss stuff and all that. People like learning, they like to hear new things. Networking is also important, they might introduce you to people with similar interests themselves.

You'd be surprised how far you can get by being a good listener, caring about people, and so on, and not even necessarily having anything interesting yourself to talk about. I made a lot of friends being that way, and I bet you if you asked them to name 20 facts about me they wouldn't be able to do it. You don't need to worry so much about being perceived as boring, just be perceptive and ask people about themselves and so on, pay attention, keep track of shit. It doesn't actually matter if you don't have anything to talk about. Nor do they a lot of the time beyond "I have a job and it was shit.". Your contribution can be "What was shit about it?" rather than "I don't have a job. I do nothing.".

I dunno man. I'd suggest you just find kind people and hang out with them. They will help you and take an interest regardless. Even people who don't talk about those topics off the bat might know things about them, or have an opinion.

That's one reason I don't buy into these alpha/beta stuff much.

The problem I run into is that I really don't like any venues where people my age meet. I don't like bars or anything like that, and no one ever talks to each other before or after class, so that's not really an option.

[Ostroeuropa]

The problem I run into is that I really don't like any venues where people my age meet. I don't like bars or anything like that, and no one ever talks to each other before or after class, so that's not really an option.

That sucks man. I hope it works out for you, I relied pretty heavily on bars in my case.

[The New California Republic]

So basically NSGeneral on a good day?

More personal than NSG, and less filled with people who have no idea what they're talking about in those areas.

Take it from me: Having an MA and MLitt in philosophy has shown me that discussing philosophy in RL with people feels just as distant as it does on here. Possibly more so in fact, as there is much more pretence when talking face to face with a person. At least on here it is all just blocks of text, which goes some way towards filtering that out. And RL discussions have far less people who know what they are talking about; as websites such as this tend to concentrate such people in one place, but in RL they are much more dispersed. The flipside is that by the same measure there are also more people that don't know what they are talking about on here; so it actually balances out somewhat.

[The South Falls]

I mean, the guy that coined those terms and tried to put scientific basis behind it ended up flipping his views and exposing that his evidence was very spotty.

[United Muscovite Nations]

More personal than NSG, and less filled with people who have no idea what they're talking about in those areas.

Take it from me: Having an MA and MLitt in philosophy has shown me that discussing philosophy in RL with people feels just as distant as it does on here. Possibly more so in fact, as there is much more pretence when talking face to face with a person. At least on here it is all just blocks of text, which goes some way towards filtering that out. And RL discussions have far less people who know what they are talking about; as websites such as this tend to concentrate such people in one place, but in RL they are much more dispersed. The flipside is that by the same measure there are also more people that don't know what they are talking about on here; so it actually balances out somewhat.

That's true, but on NSG, we're not people to each other, just forum avatars and walls of text, there's no building of a rapport or respect towards each other.

[Bienenhalde]

Eh, it depends. It can look great on some people, or bad on others m8.

I’ve yet to fall in love with any girl who wasn’t flat, so…

Hmm...If you like flat does that mean you would consider dating a male cross-dresser? :^)

[United Muscovite Nations]

I’ve yet to fall in love with any girl who wasn’t flat, so…

Hmm...If you like flat does that mean you would consider dating a male cross-dresser? :^)

Damn, just throwing yourself at him? Do you have any shame at all?

[Conserative Morality]

Take it from me: Having an MA and MLitt in philosophy has shown me that discussing philosophy in RL with people feels just as distant as it does on here. Possibly more so in fact, as there is much more pretence when talking face to face with a person. At least on here it is all just blocks of text, which goes some way towards filtering that out. And RL discussions have far less people who know what they are talking about; as websites such as this tend to concentrate such people in one place, but in RL they are much more dispersed. The flipside is that by the same measure there are also more people that don't know what they are talking about on here; so it actually balances out somewhat.

That's true, but on NSG, we're not people to each other, just forum avatars and walls of text, there's no building of a rapport or respect towards each other.

There are a few people on here I respect. Also, to contradict the previous post, discussing philosophy IRL is remarkably free of pretense if you dive in with an uncompromising attitude immediately, and then work your way down to mutual understanding, rather than the reverse.

[New haven america]

I think those terms are stupid and I hate when people on the internet tell me that I must only be attracted to big, buff jerk jock-types (aka alphas) because I am female, and apparently all women are attracted to big, buff jerk jocks.

I have a suspicion the only reason any woman goes after them (other than the intimidation factor) is because society conditions them into thinking they are their "ideal" partners, in much the same way that society conditions men into thinking a blonde haired, blue eyed, lightly tanned, skimpily-clad woman with DD breasts is their "ideal" partner.

You know, I don't get this, probably because I don't have a type.

No, seriously, I'd be willing to date basically any woman I thin is at least moderately attractive, and this has ranged at from tall women, averaged height women, shorter women, brunettes, blondes, black, red, colored hair, white women, Asians, black women, chest sizes ranging from A-GG, I could go on.

[United Muscovite Nations]

That's true, but on NSG, we're not people to each other, just forum avatars and walls of text, there's no building of a rapport or respect towards each other.

There are a few people on here I respect. Also, to contradict the previous post, discussing philosophy IRL is remarkably free of pretense if you dive in with an uncompromising attitude immediately, and then work your way down to mutual understanding, rather than the reverse.

Aye, there are people I like, but it takes much longer to get to know someone this way than IRL interaction.

[Conserative Morality]

Hmm...If you like flat does that mean you would consider dating a male cross-dresser? :^)

Damn, just throwing yourself at him? Do you have any shame at all?

am just playing Bienenhalde pls don't ora me

[United Muscovite Nations]

Damn, just throwing yourself at him? Do you have any shame at all?

am just playing Bienenhalde pls don't ora me

I see the end of thottery as clearly as I see you.

[New haven america]

Damn, just throwing yourself at him? Do you have any shame at all?

am just playing Bienenhalde pls don't ora me

That ain't crossdressing, that's manly as OHHHH MAAAAAIIIII GOOOODDDD!

[Jack Thomas Lang]

If you don't want to meet people at bars, consider joining a club. If the club has women, you get the added benefit that you already share some similar interests.

Or meet a girl in Church, that's my plan anyway. Easier than having to convince a hypothetical partner that pre-marital sex is sinful.

[Conserative Morality]

am just playing Bienenhalde pls don't ora me

That ain't crossdressing, that's manly as OHHHH MAAAAAIIIII GOOOODDDD!

[New haven america]

Not as described, but there are certainly men who have personalities and appearances that make them more socially successful than others.

Outgoing and socially aggressive people are more likely to have wider social circles, which means they're going to have more opportunities and a greater willingness to attack them. It's one of the reasons why, statistically speaking, it's likely you're friends have more friends than you do.

You also don't have to be big, buff, burly, etc...

Some of the most socially successful people I've known were fat, skinny, short, etc... and they still did fine.

[Vetalia]

Sure they do, they're the eternal enemy of Lambda Lambda Lambda.

[Mushet]

As likely the only Incel on NSG it pains me every time I have to read about alphas and betas.

It’s like people are incapable of evaluating everything as good/bad.

You are on a debate forum of an online political game, you think everyone here is getting laid except for you?

[Gormwood]

Sure they do, they're the eternal enemy of Lambda Lambda Lambda.

Finally, someone else who remembers.

[Vetalia]

Sure they do, they're the eternal enemy of Lambda Lambda Lambda.

Finally, someone else who remembers.

I was shocked that I did a search of this thread and nobody else mentioned it.

[Gormwood]

Finally, someone else who remembers.

I was shocked that I did a search of this thread and nobody else mentioned it.

Didn't they get beaten by the Nerds?

[Vetalia]

]Didn't they get beaten by the Nerds?

They did in the end, with a little Tri Lamb help.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m6-PR0cFFKY

[Rising Palms]

Ah yes, the "alpha" and "beta". No I don't believe that humans can be classified into two simplistic and rather stereotypical groups. Reality is not a comic book.