NationStates

https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-suffolk-48117678



I read some of the paragraphs, but the BBC makes that boring. I just thought the headline was hilarious as fuck. However, it does bring up some interesting theories about this:

1. Shrimp are evolving at a rate we previously didn't know. The fact that they were found to have drugs on them means they may be getting smarter than shit, possibly having already the process to make cocaine and possibly the Anti-Life Equation. We should enslave them and learn more about them.

2. It's Suffolk. While cocaine isn't such a problem, more harder drugs such as ketamine and Irish potatoes make for a possible conclusion that when Doug the Dealer wakes up after coming down from Smarties, he goes to find his bag of cocaine and asks, "Dude, where's my crack?"

3. It's actually a guy named Shrimp, a drug dealer who is literally made out of thousands of shrimp. When the bobbys come walking by he throws himself in a nearby river, breaking apart and being able to put himself back together again. His favorite sauce is actually Worcestershire.

What do you think is going on NSG?

Sounds like a fun cocktail party.

That's why I saw trump flying in the sky when I went to London last year. Thought it was the litter of meth I thought I pumped into myself.

Shanhwa wrote:DEA would like to know your location

ATF would like to know your location

Irrelevant, they have no jurisdiction here.

The New California Republic wrote:

Shanhwa wrote:DEA would like to know your location

ATF would like to know your location

Irrelevant, they have no jurisdiction here.

Plus they're pretty clueless in the states most of the time.

It's not the easiest method of drug smuggling.

An Alan Smithee Nation wrote:It's not the easiest method of drug smuggling.

Much less noticeable than when a whale shows up in the Thames, though.

Ifreann wrote:

An Alan Smithee Nation wrote:It's not the easiest method of drug smuggling.

Much less noticeable than when a whale shows up in the Thames, though.

I tell you that beluga was nothing to do with me. No way.

An Alan Smithee Nation wrote:

Ifreann wrote:Much less noticeable than when a whale shows up in the Thames, though.

I tell you that beluga was nothing to do with me. No way.

Darn, my drug smuggling apparatus pet Beluga whale got out of his enclosure and died! No, it can’t be!

I'm not surprised, as the headline predicted. Shrimp slavery when?

The Dominions of Succ wrote:I'm not surprised, as the headline predicted. Shrimp slavery when?

Shrimps rise up

Shanhwa wrote:

The Dominions of Succ wrote:I'm not surprised, as the headline predicted. Shrimp slavery when?

Shrimps rise up

You've nothing to lose but your Marie Rose sauce.

I just knew my buddy Shrimp would get busted eventually...so sad...

Are you saying that the drug lords of the future could be shrimp?

Cocktail sauce more like cracktail sauce amirite

I'll be on my way out...

Xmara wrote:Are you saying that the drug lords of the future could be shrimp?

Police today arrested the drug kingpin known as King Prawn.

Ifreann wrote:

Xmara wrote:Are you saying that the drug lords of the future could be shrimp?

Police today arrested the drug kingpin known as King Prawn.

His stash was found at Crust Station

Xmara wrote:

Ifreann wrote:Police today arrested the drug kingpin known as King Prawn.

His stash was found at Crust Station

Booo!

The guy who dropped his bag in the river must be pretty nervous right now

I mean, there's got to be a reason they like fish and chips so much, right?

Dogmeat wrote:I mean, there's got to be a reason they like fish and chips so much, right?

Fried shrimp is better anyway.

Man the Bubba Gump company is falling on hard times its a shame Bubba & Dan aren't there anymore.

Blegh, seems like it's just trace amounts and that eating coked up shrimp wouldn't have any real effects for a human. Boring.

Run suspiciously with a salmon full of drugs in England. Although the salmon running is illegal, the officers might laugh and not stop you... Do it first without drugs stuffed in it and if it works, load up your salmon.

business idea: refine cocaine from trace quantities in rivers near sewage outflows???