TDT 4: What the $#@! is a "womxn", anyways?

[Ifreann]

I have a trans sibling.

HRT is hideously expensive

it costs me 30€ every three months. y'alls need healthcare reform

The future of the EU is hormone vending machines on every street corner.

[DiscussionPuppet]

I'm kind of mad at myself now.

So I have been anonymously emailing my awesome professor, and yesterday I finally got the resolve to go talk to him in person. However, once I started to talk to him, I completely chickened out and it never got brought up. So now I have to try to do it again, but I feel like the next time I'll just do the same thing. Was anyone else this obsessively terrified before revealing your true self?

On the bright side, this professor gave me a ton of resources in my area, and he even personally knows a therapist who writes HRT letters.

I know how you feel. That used to happen to me a lot. My personal solution was to just push myself into a situation where I had to do it - in my scenario, I straight up arranged a meeting with my professor via email and put in the email what i wanted to talk to her about. No way of worming myself out of that when the time came to actually meet.

Still, if your prof gave you relevant resources and a referral to that therapist, maybe he knows at least something? He sounds like a great guy, in any case.

He really is. He was the first person I thought of telling when I seriously started to accept that I was trans, especially since he knows other trans people from his church and his life. He is definitely my favorite professor, and he is very easy to talk to. I know he is completely accepting, and I wouldn't have any issues with going to him, but my mind cannot get out of that hyper-defensive mode that basically says "if anyone at all knows this they will be disappointed in you and completely reject you, so shut up RIGHT NOW before anything gets said!" I really hate how my mind works with this kind of stuff.

Working from your solution, I could possibly schedule a visit to his office with the anonymous email, and then I would say what I needed to just by walking in. After that, I would definitely be able to talk to him about being trans, because what's the point of trying to hide it after he knows?

I'm kind of mad at myself now.

So I have been anonymously emailing my awesome professor, and yesterday I finally got the resolve to go talk to him in person. However, once I started to talk to him, I completely chickened out and it never got brought up. So now I have to try to do it again, but I feel like the next time I'll just do the same thing. Was anyone else this obsessively terrified before revealing your true self?

On the bright side, this professor gave me a ton of resources in my area, and he even personally knows a therapist who writes HRT letters.

Yes. I've clammed up like that on at least two occasions. The worst of which being when trying to talk it through the first time with the doctor who referred me to the GIC. She advised me to go away, write it all down and come back.

Thanks for the suggestion! I guess if I went into his office with a written note in my hand it would make it absolutely impossible to bail like I did.

[Hediacrana]

He really is. He was the first person I thought of telling when I seriously started to accept that I was trans, especially since he knows other trans people from his church and his life. He is definitely my favorite professor, and he is very easy to talk to. I know he is completely accepting, and I wouldn't have any issues with going to him, but my mind cannot get out of that hyper-defensive mode that basically says "if anyone at all knows this they will be disappointed in you and completely reject you, so shut up RIGHT NOW before anything gets said!" I really hate how my mind works with this kind of stuff.

I encourage you to not feel too bad about not going through with it at the last moment. Coming out is not a race; it is important that you do it at a pace that feels safe to you. I'm glad you have an affirming professor!

[DiscussionPuppet]

He really is. He was the first person I thought of telling when I seriously started to accept that I was trans, especially since he knows other trans people from his church and his life. He is definitely my favorite professor, and he is very easy to talk to. I know he is completely accepting, and I wouldn't have any issues with going to him, but my mind cannot get out of that hyper-defensive mode that basically says "if anyone at all knows this they will be disappointed in you and completely reject you, so shut up RIGHT NOW before anything gets said!" I really hate how my mind works with this kind of stuff.

I encourage you to not feel too bad about not going through with it at the last moment. Coming out is not a race; it is important that you do it at a pace that feels safe to you. I'm glad you have an affirming professor!

Thanks for that. I've been really hard on myself for letting such a great opportunity slip by when I was literally in his office with him.

[First American Empire]

Demigirl was an option on the quiz. It didn't score very high.

How high was genderflux?

Even lower. It was tied for 20th place.

[Auzkhia]

Even lower. It was tied for 20th place.

I see, there are so many labels there. My lowest were gender undetermined, cis female, and cis male.

[Mettaton-EX]

it costs me 30€ every three months. y'alls need healthcare reform

The future of the EU is hormone vending machines on every street corner.

inshallah.

[Dumb Ideologies]

The future of the EU is hormone vending machines on every street corner.

inshallah.

do you need a tissue?

[Mettaton-EX]

inshallah.

do you need a tissue?

لا، وأنت؟

[Dumb Ideologies]

do you need a tissue?

لا، وأنت؟

Yuck! We don't need to see the contents of the tissue afterwards!

[Mettaton-EX]

لا، وأنت؟

Yuck! We don't need to see the contents of the tissue afterwards!

الموت للفاشية، الحرية للشعب

[Neutraligon]

Yuck! We don't need to see the contents of the tissue afterwards!

الموت للفاشية، الحرية للشعب

This is a mostly English forum (we have threads for various languages but in order to allow the readers to understand posts should be in English).

[The V O I D]

I just took that quiz on the other page and I don't know how to feel about the results.

I've never had reason to ask myself some of the questions in that quiz, and was surprised by some of the answers, but felt pretty confident that I was comfortable with being born biologically male and was completely masculine. I mean, I'm pretty fucking conformist and all, so I figured that had to be all there was to it. I've absolutely, positively never questioned that I had male parts and was male, and have always felt at least some bits of pride at being masculine-looking.

...and then, apparently, I come to find out that I am apparently agender based on the very honest answers to the quiz's questions that forced me to think about it. I know this isn't necessarily the place to talk about it, but it is the place the quiz was posted, and I wanted to share the results because I have absolutely no idea how to feel.

[Deutschess Kaiserreich]

Are gay or lesbian people more likely to become trans? A question that's been on my mind for a while.

[Dumb Ideologies]

I just took that quiz on the other page and I don't know how to feel about the results.

I've never had reason to ask myself some of the questions in that quiz, and was surprised by some of the answers, but felt pretty confident that I was comfortable with being born biologically male and was completely masculine. I mean, I'm pretty fucking conformist and all, so I figured that had to be all there was to it. I've absolutely, positively never questioned that I had male parts and was male, and have always felt at least some bits of pride at being masculine-looking.

...and then, apparently, I come to find out that I am apparently agender based on the very honest answers to the quiz's questions that forced me to think about it. I know this isn't necessarily the place to talk about it, but it is the place the quiz was posted, and I wanted to share the results because I have absolutely no idea how to feel.

If it's never caused you any issues in life previously don't let the result of an internet quiz compiled by an amateur make you overthink too much.

[Autonomous Cleaner Bot Cleaners]

I'm all familiar with the term sissy, it's even a title of a memoir from a nonbinary person and they grew up knowing that term for themself.

This book: http://www.worldcat.org/oclc/1090907688 ?

[The V O I D]

I just took that quiz on the other page and I don't know how to feel about the results.

I've never had reason to ask myself some of the questions in that quiz, and was surprised by some of the answers, but felt pretty confident that I was comfortable with being born biologically male and was completely masculine. I mean, I'm pretty fucking conformist and all, so I figured that had to be all there was to it. I've absolutely, positively never questioned that I had male parts and was male, and have always felt at least some bits of pride at being masculine-looking.

...and then, apparently, I come to find out that I am apparently agender based on the very honest answers to the quiz's questions that forced me to think about it. I know this isn't necessarily the place to talk about it, but it is the place the quiz was posted, and I wanted to share the results because I have absolutely no idea how to feel.

If it's never caused you any issues in life previously don't let the result of an internet quiz compiled by an amateur make you overthink too much.

I'm not going to let it affect me in life for now, since it doesn't seem like anything really needs changing. But at the same time, this is a fundamental part of myself that I've begun to question - and the more I question it, the more the answers I thought about expand and do not change.

[Auzkhia]

Are gay or lesbian people more likely to become trans? A question that's been on my mind for a while.

Maybe. I don't know.

I knew I was bisexual before I realized I was trans.

I just took that quiz on the other page and I don't know how to feel about the results.

I've never had reason to ask myself some of the questions in that quiz, and was surprised by some of the answers, but felt pretty confident that I was comfortable with being born biologically male and was completely masculine. I mean, I'm pretty fucking conformist and all, so I figured that had to be all there was to it. I've absolutely, positively never questioned that I had male parts and was male, and have always felt at least some bits of pride at being masculine-looking.

...and then, apparently, I come to find out that I am apparently agender based on the very honest answers to the quiz's questions that forced me to think about it. I know this isn't necessarily the place to talk about it, but it is the place the quiz was posted, and I wanted to share the results because I have absolutely no idea how to feel.

I felt a similar way when I was questioning. For me personally, I was confused and in fear, I internalized a lot of transphobia and gatekeeping, besides, life as a cis man would be the safest but that wasn't me.

[The Xenopolis Confederation]

I just took that quiz on the other page and I don't know how to feel about the results.

I've never had reason to ask myself some of the questions in that quiz, and was surprised by some of the answers, but felt pretty confident that I was comfortable with being born biologically male and was completely masculine. I mean, I'm pretty fucking conformist and all, so I figured that had to be all there was to it. I've absolutely, positively never questioned that I had male parts and was male, and have always felt at least some bits of pride at being masculine-looking.

...and then, apparently, I come to find out that I am apparently agender based on the very honest answers to the quiz's questions that forced me to think about it. I know this isn't necessarily the place to talk about it, but it is the place the quiz was posted, and I wanted to share the results because I have absolutely no idea how to feel.

It is possible that this is a sign you might have a non-cis gender identity, but it is also possible you might just be a cis man who doesn't put that much importance on their gender, and as a result was labelled agender on the test. I'm not sure. Don't beat yourself up over it though, you are who you are, a test isn't going to change that, only (accurately or inaccurately) identify it.

[Mettaton-EX]

but it is also possible you might just be a cis man who doesn't put that much importance on their gender

yes, this is more common than a lot of people think. cis men (for the most part) don't have to put importance on their gender the way other people do.

[The New California Republic]

cis men (for the most part) don't have to put importance on their gender the way other people do.

What do you mean by this?

[Cekoviu]

Well, it's not necessarily equal to trans woman. I'm a fairly butch trans woman, so I wouldn't consider myself transfeminine, but other trans women might be.

I think it might refer to more in identity than expression, because I know some feminine looking trans/nb people that call themselves transmasculine.

Feminine looking doesn't mean feminine, necessarily.

[Cekoviu]

it costs me 30€ every three months. y'alls need healthcare reform

The future of the EU is hormone vending machines on every street corner.

Sounds amazing

[Socialist Workers Combine]

Are gay or lesbian people more likely to become trans? A question that's been on my mind for a while.

It’s spread pretty even straight/bisexual/gaye

[Cekoviu]

Are gay or lesbian people more likely to become trans? A question that's been on my mind for a while.

You're asking about like people who are attracted to people of the gender they were assigned? I don't think that's the case. Only about 5% of the trans people I know are totally straight, so that would not indicate a higher number of straight (attracted to the opposite gender - their assigned gender at birth) than non-straight people transitioning. However, it's not a big enough sample size to draw any definitive conclusions.
By the way, you don't become trans, you just transition. You're either always trans or always cis.