Is it racist to have ethnic/racial preferences in dating?

[Las Palmeras]

On another note, I find the OP to be quite idealistic in thinking that copious race-mixing would "decrease racism". 8 years of living in Latin America have made me consider that it isn't the case, at least as a personal conclusion. At most OP's scenario would change American-style racism (presuming OP is in the USA) or the way it's expressed in society at large.

[Hanafuridake]

It depends on the specific motivation of the preference. I've met a lot of people who want to date Asian or Hispanic women because they believe they're more feminine and subservient than women of other races, that's definitely racist (and sexist, but beside the point). But if you just prefer physical traits associated with one race over another, then no, that's not inherently racist.

At the end of the day, I think people have the absolute right to refuse consent for whatever reason (even racist) so I tend to assume good faith when someone says they'll only date X.

[USS Monitor]

Though I'd wager that racial fetishism towards another group could also have hints of racism.

It could, but I don't think it always does.

Just being really into people of a particular race is harmless, maybe even positive. If it becomes a motivation to act creepy toward them, then yeah, racist.

[Infected Mushroom]

Preferences, no they’re just physical aspects you find appealing. I find Asian men to be the most attractive features
There’s then the difference between preferences and saying “Id never date a black guy”

So if I never outright say (or admit to myself) "I would never date a black person" but it turns out that in practice this is nearly true (the percentage of blacks I would date is close non-existent compared to the percentage from other groups)... its not racism? Just preference?

it needs to be an absolute (and self-declared/admitted) blanket ban?

it just sounds like a very fine line

[Grug Island]

No, but if you're the wrong race, you'll get called a racist by some sjws.

Shut up

[Brittany Normandy Aquitaine]

I tend to like white women better then other races, but I still may find someone of a seperate race attractive. But I am not a racist for having preferences when it comes to crushes and dating, etc.

[The Black Forrest]

It depends on the strength of the preference and the reasoning behind it.

If you are open to dating any race, but there are some you are attracted to more often, that's not racist. That's just who you're attracted to.

If you have a self-imposed rule, "I only date X race," and you would never date anyone of another race even if you were attracted, that's a little racist.

The key thing isn't whether you're attracted to everyone equally. Not every person on the planet is going to be attracted to every other person on the planet, and it's not your fault if you're just not attracted to someone. The key thing is how you would react if you met someone you ARE attracted to, but they aren't a race you usually date.

Indeed. It's all about the reason why.

[LiberNovusAmericae]

No, but if you're the wrong race, you'll get called a racist by some sjws.

Shut up

Or what? You'll act like a triggered snowflake?

[The Black Forrest]

No, but if you're the wrong race, you'll get called a racist by some sjws.

[Las Palmeras]

Though I'd wager that racial fetishism towards another group could also have hints of racism.

It could, but I don't think it always does.

Just being really into people of a particular race is harmless, maybe even positive. If it becomes a motivation to act creepy toward them, then yeah, racist.

Well yeah, mutual respect and humanization is what matters no matter the color. Creeps being creepy show they're inconsiderate because they're not seeing others as people.

[LiberNovusAmericae]

No, but if you're the wrong race, you'll get called a racist by some sjws.

I'll rephrase. White people having ethnic dating preferences will cause a small group of people (who take social justice too far) to lose it. Having ethnic preferences when dating should not be considered racist in and of itself.

[Hansdeltania]

It all depends on why your preferences are that way. If it's because you think one race happens to be more attractive, go ahead. That's probably just your penis or vagina thinking, but you do you. (No pun intended.)

However, if you date a certain race because you think that the other races are inferior in some way, that's racist.

[Bombadil]

Why does this question keep cropping up, is it some desperate justification for racism in trying to get people to admit to racial preferences.

You find beauty in what’s around you.

Because the people who are doing it for racist reasons are fishing for someone to tell them it's not racist.

I suspect it’s some racist trope along the lines of ‘everyone’s a racist but don’t admit it, you just ask them if they’d date an (insert race) person.’

They can then answer their own question with if they say ‘yes’ they’re lying and if no then, see, everyone’s racist really.

[Neanderthaland]

By definition yes, but it's not necessarily a sign of moral deficiency. You are attracted to what you are attracted to, and likely cannot change that. Demanding that you do so would be nearly as unreasonable as demanding they change skin color.

[Infected Mushroom]

By definition yes, but it's not necessarily a sign of moral deficiency. You are attracted to what you are attracted to, and likely cannot change that. Demanding that you do so would be nearly as unreasonable as demanding they change skin color.

This

[The Black Party]

By definition yes, but it's not necessarily a sign of moral deficiency. You are attracted to what you are attracted to, and likely cannot change that. Demanding that you do so would be nearly as unreasonable as demanding they change skin color.

You make it sound like humans are inherently racist

or that we conjured a poor definition for "racism".

[Neanderthaland]

By definition yes, but it's not necessarily a sign of moral deficiency. You are attracted to what you are attracted to, and likely cannot change that. Demanding that you do so would be nearly as unreasonable as demanding they change skin color.

You make it sound like humans are inherently racist

or that we conjured a poor definition for "racism".

Humans are inherently prone to tribalism, which is where racism comes from. But that's not really where I was going with this.

I mean to say that humans develop specific sexual preferences at some point before their mid-to-late teenage years. And once developed they prove very resistant to change. If part of your sexual preferences relate to race, then there's probably not much you can do about that.

I don't think it's a "poor definition" of racism, I think it's one of those situations where a normally bad thing is less objectionable. Similarly, it's okay to deliberately hire a Black actor to play Othelo, even though there are plenty of White actors who could play the part.

[Parhe]

"Racism: showing or feeling discrimination or prejudice against people of other races, or believing that a particular race is superior to another."
-Google

Yes. Obviously. Having ethnic, racial, or national preferences in dating is racist. Person A feels people of the same race as herself is a superior match compared to people of other races, at least on average. That said, racism isn't inherently a bad thing, which I think the majority of Westerners (a group that covers most people on this site including myself) does not understand and have a kneejerk "no" response to the question. Maybe they are afraid that calling it out as racist may open the doors for other racist views or actions possibly becoming normalized and acceptable? I don't know. Though, unlike some, I do not think a preference for people of the same race is innate.

I am racist when it comes to dating, I 100% prefer Korean men and women over other ethnic groups when it comes to dating. I've dated people of other backgrounds, namely African American, Nigerian, White American, Japanese, and Chinese, while I've lately been attracted to a Hispanic coworker, but I strongly gravitate towards other Koreans.

[USS Monitor]

By definition yes, but it's not necessarily a sign of moral deficiency. You are attracted to what you are attracted to, and likely cannot change that. Demanding that you do so would be nearly as unreasonable as demanding they change skin color.

You make it sound like humans are inherently racist

or that we conjured a poor definition for "racism".

Most people are a little bit racist. That doesn't mean it should be encouraged or that everyone's racism is equal.

[USS Monitor]

Maybe they are afraid that calling it out as racist may open the doors for other racist views or actions possibly becoming normalized and acceptable?

I think you're giving people too much credit. It's more like they're afraid that if they admit to being racist in one way, they might have to think about whether they are also racist in other ways.

[Aclion]

Depends. Is it sexist to have a sex preference in dating?

[New haven america]

By definition yes, but it's not necessarily a sign of moral deficiency. You are attracted to what you are attracted to, and likely cannot change that. Demanding that you do so would be nearly as unreasonable as demanding they change skin color.

You make it sound like humans are inherently racist

or that we conjured a poor definition for "racism".

Inherently racist no, because race has only existed for ~500 years or so.

But discriminatory based on whether they're part of your group or not (And this goes beyond race. Nationality, sex/gender, language, class, etc... can all play a part)? Most definitely.

[New haven america]

Depends. Is it sexist to have a sex preference in dating?

No, because people who aren't attracted to a certain sex or no sex at all can become physically sick by doing things with the sex not of their preference, and this is an involuntary reaction.

Saying: "I don't want to date any black/white/Asian people" is racist because you believe a certain group is inferior, or damaged, or alien, or etc... When race is literally only skin deep. You aren't born racist, you're taught racism.

[The New California Republic]

This exact topic was debated to death just a few months ago.

[Washington Resistance Army]

No, it is not. You can't control what you do and don't find attractive.