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Should we clone Jesus?

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 1:46 am
by The Blaatschapen
So, with the advent of human cloning technology. Should we clone Jesus? There might be some usable DNA left in one of the relics (holy foreskin?). Thus, we can clone Him and force the second coming. And third, and fourth, why stop at only one :)


Or even better yet, a Jesus for everyone. Think of it :Your Own Personal Jesus *cue good Depeche Mode song*

In the end, the second coming is very important for various faiths. Why not help it a hand and force the issue :)

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 1:48 am
by Sougra
The blAAtschApen wrote:So, with the advent of human cloning technology. Should we clone Jesus? There might be some usable DNA left in one of the relics (holy foreskin?). Thus, we can clone Him and force the second coming. And third, and fourth, why stop at only one :)


Or even better yet, a Jesus for everyone. Think of it :Your Own Personal Jesus *cue good Depeche Mode song*

In the end, the second coming is very important for various faiths. Why not help it a hand and force the issue :)

You're literally describing a Star Trek: The Next Generation episode right now.

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 1:48 am
by Jelmatt
I don't think a clone of Jesus would count as being of the same essence as God, really, theologically speaking.

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 1:49 am
by Vassenor
There'd probably be some mental gymnastics about how it doesn't actually count when it doesn't result in all the prophecies coming true.

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 1:50 am
by Vassenor
Sougra wrote:
The blAAtschApen wrote:So, with the advent of human cloning technology. Should we clone Jesus? There might be some usable DNA left in one of the relics (holy foreskin?). Thus, we can clone Him and force the second coming. And third, and fourth, why stop at only one :)


Or even better yet, a Jesus for everyone. Think of it :Your Own Personal Jesus *cue good Depeche Mode song*

In the end, the second coming is very important for various faiths. Why not help it a hand and force the issue :)

You're literally describing a Star Trek: The Next Generation episode right now.


So what, we install the clone Jesus into a figurehead political position just to stop the Christians toppling all the governments?

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 1:51 am
by Arkeyana
One: What

Two: Ok how do we know if its "Jesus" DNA

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:09 am
by Anywhere Else But Here
Yep. Stick a Jesus in every African village, and you just solved world hunger.

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:12 am
by The Batavia
Yeah, and make him a Cyborg with machine gun arms while you're at it.

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:13 am
by The Empire of Pretantia
That would start Third Impact, not the Second Coming.

Vassenor wrote:There'd probably be some mental gymnastics about how it doesn't actually count when it doesn't result in all the prophecies coming true.

It's actually incredibly easy to explain (well, besides the obvious scientific answer)

It's not Jesus, but a clone of Jesus.
Arkeyana wrote:One: What

Two: Ok how do we know if its "Jesus" DNA

Angelic chanting whenever you pick up the sample.

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:13 am
by The Blaatschapen
Jelmatt wrote:I don't think a clone of Jesus would count as being of the same essence as God, really, theologically speaking.


Only one way to find out :)

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:14 am
by The Alma Mater
Arkeyana wrote:One: What

Two: Ok how do we know if its "Jesus" DNA


Are you suggesting that churches who claim to have the holy foreskin are lying ?

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:14 am
by Aclion
Didn't the second coming already happen? Isn't that the whole deal with easter?

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:15 am
by The Empire of Pretantia
Aclion wrote:Didn't the second coming already happen? Isn't that the whole deal with easter?

Nein, that was Jesus turning around right after leaving the house to grab his car keys.

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:15 am
by The Blaatschapen
Aclion wrote:Didn't the second coming already happen? Isn't that the whole deal with easter?


Easter was two months ago. Did I miss something in the news?

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:16 am
by Rostavykhan
Sougra wrote:
The blAAtschApen wrote:So, with the advent of human cloning technology. Should we clone Jesus? There might be some usable DNA left in one of the relics (holy foreskin?). Thus, we can clone Him and force the second coming. And third, and fourth, why stop at only one :)


Or even better yet, a Jesus for everyone. Think of it :Your Own Personal Jesus *cue good Depeche Mode song*

In the end, the second coming is very important for various faiths. Why not help it a hand and force the issue :)

You're literally describing a Star Trek: The Next Generation episode right now.


GODDAMNIT I WAS ABOUT TO BRING THAT UP.

:clap:

Was going to say, cloning Jesus probably might offend some, and I doubt we could expect "New" Jesus to live up to what "Old" Jesus had done. Then again, it might be interpreted as the Second Coming by others, and he might be looked up to as a leader for Christendom.

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:16 am
by Mzeusia
Clone Jesus! What an awful Idea.

The poor guy will have a terrible life, always being hounded by people. He'll probably be scared of crosses, seeing as how he did die on one.
Also, Holywood would most likely snap him up.

Leave him dead.

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:17 am
by The Empire of Pretantia
How many people will be surprised when the clone is only four feet tall?

Not I, said the Austin Powers fan.

Rostavykhan wrote:
Sougra wrote:You're literally describing a Star Trek: The Next Generation episode right now.


GODDAMNIT I WAS ABOUT TO BRING THAT UP.

:clap:

Was going to say, cloning Jesus probably might offend some, and I doubt we could expect "New" Jesus to live up to what "Old" Jesus had done. Then again, it might be interpreted as the Second Coming by others, and he might be looked up to as a leader for Christendom.

At the very least they'd probably make him a saint.

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:18 am
by Anywhere Else But Here
Mzeusia wrote:Clone Jesus! What an awful Idea.

The poor guy will have a terrible life, always being hounded by people. He'll probably be scared of crosses, seeing as how he did die on one.
Also, Holywood would most likely snap him up.

Leave him dead.

Clone Jesus wouldn't remember the crucifixion.

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:18 am
by Boer Volkstaat
Jesus was resurrected and will be returning soon, any attempts to clone for example taking dna off the shroud of turin is anti-christ.

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:18 am
by The Empire of Pretantia
Mzeusia wrote:Clone Jesus! What an awful Idea.

The poor guy will have a terrible life, always being hounded by people. He'll probably be scared of crosses, seeing as how he did die on one.
Also, Holywood would most likely snap him up.

Leave him dead.

TBF dying on the cross was his idea.

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:18 am
by The Alma Mater
Anywhere Else But Here wrote:
Mzeusia wrote:Clone Jesus! What an awful Idea.

The poor guy will have a terrible life, always being hounded by people. He'll probably be scared of crosses, seeing as how he did die on one.
Also, Holywood would most likely snap him up.

Leave him dead.

Clone Jesus wouldn't remember the crucifixion.


Clone Jesus in fact would be an entirely different person than the original; since his whole life will go differently.

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:19 am
by The Empire of Pretantia
Boer Volkstaat wrote:Jesus was resurrected and will be returning soontm, any attempts to clone for example taking dna off the shroud of turin is anti-christ.

Fixed

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:19 am
by Mzeusia
Anywhere Else But Here wrote:Clone Jesus wouldn't remember the crucifixion.

True. Still be a terrible life. Don't fix what's not broken. Breaking Jesus may not be the best.

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:20 am
by The Alma Mater
Mzeusia wrote:
Anywhere Else But Here wrote:Clone Jesus wouldn't remember the crucifixion.

True. Still be a terrible life. Don't fix what's not broken. Breaking Jesus may not be the best.

It does however sound like a good title for a Netflix series.

PostPosted: Sat Jun 02, 2018 2:20 am
by The Blaatschapen
The Alma Mater wrote:
Anywhere Else But Here wrote:Clone Jesus wouldn't remember the crucifixion.


Clone Jesus in fact would be an entirely different person than the original; since his whole life will go differently.


It must be very weird though, with his depiction everywhere and him not remembering why.