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Should we clone Jesus?

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Dumb Ideologies
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Postby Dumb Ideologies » Sat Jun 02, 2018 5:16 am

A Jesus for every town. Loaves and fish for all would solve the upcoming global food crisis and rising sea levels can be turned into a non-stop party by changing the flood water into wine.
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The Blaatschapen
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Postby The Blaatschapen » Sat Jun 02, 2018 5:52 am

Ifreann wrote:I don't think we should be satisfied with just cloning Jesus. We should genetically engineer a superior Jesus. Better. Stronger. Faster. Holier.


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Herrebrugh
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Postby Herrebrugh » Sat Jun 02, 2018 5:55 am

There's your virgin birth.
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A m e n r i a
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Authoritarian Democracy

Postby A m e n r i a » Sat Jun 02, 2018 6:18 am

Fun fact: Jesus isn't dead. The prophet will help Imam Mahdi in the fight against Dajjal when it's almost Judgement Day. We don't need to clone him as his return is certain. Just wait a few centuries. Or millennia.
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The South Falls
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Postby The South Falls » Sat Jun 02, 2018 6:21 am

That's not a second coming. That's forcing Jesus out. Anyway, how do we even know whatever's left is Jesus'? We could end up with some random tomb robber.
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Uxupox
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Ex-Nation

Postby Uxupox » Sat Jun 02, 2018 6:32 am

This is one way to unite the whole of Christendom against you.
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Kromi
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Postby Kromi » Sat Jun 02, 2018 6:35 am

No! He shall remain in heaven.
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Aboim
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Ex-Nation

Postby Aboim » Sat Jun 02, 2018 6:35 am

To improve genetic engineering and to obtain his powers is the right answer.

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Geneviev
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Postby Geneviev » Sat Jun 02, 2018 7:10 am

I just saw the title and have to say, this sounds fun.

How do we know the relics are Jesus though? People might accidentally clone someone completely different.

That sounds funny though. Let's do it.
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Ethel mermania
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Postby Ethel mermania » Sat Jun 02, 2018 7:16 am

Clearly the OP is getting tired of doing all the lawn care.
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The Blaatschapen
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Postby The Blaatschapen » Sat Jun 02, 2018 7:19 am

Ethel mermania wrote:Clearly the OP is getting tired of doing all the lawn care.


I just want a shepherd to take care of me :blush:
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Theodosiya
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Postby Theodosiya » Sat Jun 02, 2018 7:19 am

The Empire of Pretantia wrote:
Vassenor wrote:
Because the world doesn't need more genocidal dictators.

You sure about that? Japan could use another.

No thanks. I don't want to re-live my late grandma live during occupation of Japan. Still, though... I might look cool with a Type 99 and IJA Para uniform...

Or, talking about genocidal dictator... anyone want to be literally sacked and never found...?

As to OP question. Nope, not a really good idea. Had I been a fanatic, I'll chase you all over Netherlands, even if I have to wait for few more years to get scholarship. Luckily, I'm not. Because clones aren't exact copy. And Jesus is Jesus, and while you can, in theory clone him, it's not him, just a copy of him.
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Ethel mermania
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Father Knows Best State

Postby Ethel mermania » Sat Jun 02, 2018 7:23 am

The blAAtschApen wrote:
Ethel mermania wrote:Clearly the OP is getting tired of doing all the lawn care.


I just want a shepherd to take care of me :blush:


More of a david then, I like him better, Jesus is just alright with me
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Shrive
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Corrupt Dictatorship

Postby Shrive » Sat Jun 02, 2018 7:28 am

First of all, many of the Holy Relics are fake- the Catholics loved making them up.

Second of all, according to my personal faith, Jesus was a part of God theirself, so I don't know whether that would be a good idea or not.

Third of all, DNA has an expiry date that is very short, and Jesus' DNA would have long since expired. It wouldn't be possible unless we literally traveled back in time and asked him to spit in a cup.
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Hadost
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Ex-Nation

Postby Hadost » Sat Jun 02, 2018 7:30 am

No, never!


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The Archregimancy
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Democratic Socialists

Postby The Archregimancy » Sat Jun 02, 2018 8:05 am

We seem to be basing this on the Holy Prepuce, yes?

I'm afraid that ship has sailed. Of the multiple claimants to be the authentic foreskin of Our Lord, the last known survivor was stolen in 1983.

Blaat will be happy to learn that his best chance of finding something purporting to contain Jesus DNA is in fact much closer to home. See also here.



For what it's worth, it would be easier to clone Muhammed.

Largely because we know where he's buried.

I'm sure the Saudis would prove amenable

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-United Republic of Freedonia
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Ex-Nation

Postby -United Republic of Freedonia » Sat Jun 02, 2018 8:05 am

On OP's question.

No, if he is cloned he would order us to do stuff.
I don't want Jesus to take the wheel, i want to keep sinning!.
Plus, he won't be him, as others said, that clone is just a copy.

Go back the to barn Blaat.
Last edited by -United Republic of Freedonia on Sat Jun 02, 2018 8:06 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Fartsniffage
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Liberal Democratic Socialists

Postby Fartsniffage » Sat Jun 02, 2018 8:07 am

The Archregimancy wrote:Clone Wars Jesus:



Image

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Amuaplye
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New York Times Democracy

Postby Amuaplye » Sat Jun 02, 2018 8:07 am

Boer Volkstaat wrote:Jesus was resurrected and will be returning soon, any attempts to clone for example taking dna off the shroud of turin is anti-christ.

Wasn't the Shroud of Turin deemed to be a fake?
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Olthar
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Ex-Nation

Postby Olthar » Sat Jun 02, 2018 8:12 am

Ifreann wrote:
The Huskar Social Union wrote:Make an atheist jesus just to piss off people.

We could have a whole range of diverse Jesuses to piss people off. Gay Jesus. Lady Jesus. Authentically Middle Eastern Jesus.

I'll take a lesbian Jesus! And make sure she's hot.
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Vassenor
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Left-wing Utopia

Postby Vassenor » Sat Jun 02, 2018 8:15 am

Amuaplye wrote:
Boer Volkstaat wrote:Jesus was resurrected and will be returning soon, any attempts to clone for example taking dna off the shroud of turin is anti-christ.

Wasn't the Shroud of Turin deemed to be a fake?


We're not allowed to talk about how it got radiocarbon-dated to the thirteenth century.
Last edited by Vassenor on Sat Jun 02, 2018 8:16 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Hurdergaryp
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Democratic Socialists

Postby Hurdergaryp » Sat Jun 02, 2018 8:18 am

Vassenor wrote:There'd probably be some mental gymnastics about how it doesn't actually count when it doesn't result in all the prophecies coming true.

Theology can be ridiculously flexible when the fate of its religion is at stake.

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Anywhere Else But Here
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Ex-Nation

Postby Anywhere Else But Here » Sat Jun 02, 2018 8:20 am

The Archregimancy wrote:We seem to be basing this on the Holy Prepuce, yes?

I'm afraid that ship has sailed. Of the multiple claimants to be the authentic foreskin of Our Lord, the last known survivor was stolen in 1983.

What if it was stolen by scientists for this very purpose? For all we know, Clone Jesus could already be among us.

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Hakons
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Postby Hakons » Sat Jun 02, 2018 8:22 am

A clone is still a separate organism. :p

You can't clone memories, souls, and the Godhead made flesh.
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