On The Distribution of Spouses

[Costa Fierro]

The point is that men who don't have or get partners due to circumstances beyond their control, or even in their control, don't deserve ridicule. How is that not obvious?

They don’t
People who demand people marry them do.

Which is why the reaction to the OP has been universally against the OP's ideas. That doesn't mean what I said is any less right.

[Internationalist Bastard]

I’m also schizophrenic and have OCD. I’m also an alcoholic though I haven’t been on that for a while

Then I don't know how you do it tbh. I would say your experience is certainly not typical.

Schizophrenia and OCD shouldn't be in the same group. That's like saying ADHD is more like DID than like Tourette's. Not that I'm really sensitive about that or anything.

Anyways, I don't think anyone is mocked or blamed for not having a partner because of mental illness. Not that I've seen, anyways.

They aren't in the same group, but they both have severe impacts on the ability to take care of onesself that are similar, they are also well-known for being co-morbid with each other.

I think there's a lot of overlap in the lack of ability to get a partner and mental illness. It's usually not the mental illness that is mocked, but society is perfectly happy mocking the effects of mental illness, even without limiting things to the specific situation.

I am successful because we live in a society where I’m a fetish. Only reason. Also just generally easier to date men then women, making it easier to maintain a relationship
My point however, is that movements like the Incels bother me because it makes it out like being single is the worst thing and once that’s resolved things will be easier. It makes a real issue into some comical exaggeration about getting laid

[United Muscovite Nations]

Then I don't know how you do it tbh. I would say your experience is certainly not typical.


They aren't in the same group, but they both have severe impacts on the ability to take care of onesself that are similar, they are also well-known for being co-morbid with each other.

I think there's a lot of overlap in the lack of ability to get a partner and mental illness. It's usually not the mental illness that is mocked, but society is perfectly happy mocking the effects of mental illness, even without limiting things to the specific situation.

There's no evidence I can find for a correlation between mental illness and finding a partner. Do you have a source for that?

Marital status

A significantly larger number of subjects had to remain single when their onset of illness was before 25 years of age in comparison with those in whom the onset was later Table 4. The singles group included those who were unmarried, as well as those divorced and separated due to the illness. Nevertheless, a comparison of divorced and separated subjects with those living together did not demonstrate a statistically significant difference, despite a higher proportion of females being divorced or separated from their spouses because of mental illness.


Time of onset of illness Remained single / Remained married
Before 25 years (n=31) 21 / 10
After 26 years (n=19)   2 / 17
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2913571/

For schizophrenia.

[United Muscovite Nations]

Then I don't know how you do it tbh. I would say your experience is certainly not typical.


They aren't in the same group, but they both have severe impacts on the ability to take care of onesself that are similar, they are also well-known for being co-morbid with each other.

I think there's a lot of overlap in the lack of ability to get a partner and mental illness. It's usually not the mental illness that is mocked, but society is perfectly happy mocking the effects of mental illness, even without limiting things to the specific situation.

I am successful because we live in a society where I’m a fetish. Only reason. Also just generally easier to date men then women, making it easier to maintain a relationship
My point however, is that movements like the Incels bother me because it makes it out like being single is the worst thing and once that’s resolved things will be easier. It makes a real issue into some comical exaggeration about getting laid

True on both accounts. However, it should be pointed out that it's been shown that loneliness does have a significant impact on mental and physical health.

[Geneviev]

There's no evidence I can find for a correlation between mental illness and finding a partner. Do you have a source for that?

Marital status

A significantly larger number of subjects had to remain single when their onset of illness was before 25 years of age in comparison with those in whom the onset was later Table 4. The singles group included those who were unmarried, as well as those divorced and separated due to the illness. Nevertheless, a comparison of divorced and separated subjects with those living together did not demonstrate a statistically significant difference, despite a higher proportion of females being divorced or separated from their spouses because of mental illness.


Time of onset of illness Remained single / Remained married
Before 25 years (n=31) 21 / 10
After 26 years (n=19)   2 / 17
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2913571/

For schizophrenia.

Oh, okay. Then that's fair.

[Internationalist Bastard]

I am successful because we live in a society where I’m a fetish. Only reason. Also just generally easier to date men then women, making it easier to maintain a relationship
My point however, is that movements like the Incels bother me because it makes it out like being single is the worst thing and once that’s resolved things will be easier. It makes a real issue into some comical exaggeration about getting laid

True on both accounts. However, it should be pointed out that it's been shown that loneliness does have a significant impact on mental and physical health.

I agree, Wei has made it a lot easier to manage. But it doesn’t resolve me needing everything to go clockwise

[Geneviev]

Here's a better idea than a lottery system that won't sound like the plot of a generic dystopian novel:

People may apply to have the government assign them a partner, who they can reject if they would like to. People will also be taught that arranged marriages are a good thing in order to prevent confusion about arranged marriages being the same as forced marriages. Arranged marriages should be encouraged.

[New Emeline]

Here's a better idea than a lottery system that won't sound like the plot of a generic dystopian novel:

People may apply to have the government assign them a partner, who they can reject if they would like to. People will also be taught that arranged marriages are a good thing in order to prevent confusion about arranged marriages being the same as forced marriages. Arranged marriages should be encouraged.

Why should they be encouraged?

[Geneviev]

Here's a better idea than a lottery system that won't sound like the plot of a generic dystopian novel:

People may apply to have the government assign them a partner, who they can reject if they would like to. People will also be taught that arranged marriages are a good thing in order to prevent confusion about arranged marriages being the same as forced marriages. Arranged marriages should be encouraged.

Why should they be encouraged?

1. Incels won't be a problem anymore.
2. They usually lead to less divorce.
3. Because cultural reasons make me biased.

[United Muscovite Nations]

Here's a better idea than a lottery system that won't sound like the plot of a generic dystopian novel:

People may apply to have the government assign them a partner, who they can reject if they would like to. People will also be taught that arranged marriages are a good thing in order to prevent confusion about arranged marriages being the same as forced marriages. Arranged marriages should be encouraged.

I would agree with this.

[New Emeline]

Why should they be encouraged?

1. Incels won't be a problem anymore.
2. They usually lead to less divorce.
3. Because cultural reasons make me biased.

What cultural reasons?
Also, if people are allowed to reject their assigned spouse, incels might still be a problem.

[Geneviev]

1. Incels won't be a problem anymore.
2. They usually lead to less divorce.
3. Because cultural reasons make me biased.

What cultural reasons?
Also, if people are allowed to reject their assigned spouse, incels might still be a problem.

I only have experience with successful arranged marriages.

Perhaps, but less so.

[New Emeline]

What cultural reasons?
Also, if people are allowed to reject their assigned spouse, incels might still be a problem.

I only have experience with successful arranged marriages.

Perhaps, but less so.

I don't think I've ever met anyone in an arranged marriage.

[Geneviev]

I only have experience with successful arranged marriages.

Perhaps, but less so.

I don't think I've ever met anyone in an arranged marriage.

That would be where culture is involved.

[New Emeline]

I don't think I've ever met anyone in an arranged marriage.

That would be where culture is involved.

Yeah.

[Internationalist Bastard]

I only have experience with successful arranged marriages.

Perhaps, but less so.

I don't think I've ever met anyone in an arranged marriage.

My husbands parents wanted to have him enter like a match maker thing

[New Emeline]

I don't think I've ever met anyone in an arranged marriage.

My husbands parents wanted to have him enter like a match maker thing

huh

[Internationalist Bastard]

My husbands parents wanted to have him enter like a match maker thing

huh

Yeah, then again rural China

[New Emeline]

huh

Yeah, then again rural China

ah, okay

[Sahansahiye Iran]

Here's a better idea than a lottery system that won't sound like the plot of a generic dystopian novel:

People may apply to have the government assign them a partner, who they can reject if they would like to. People will also be taught that arranged marriages are a good thing in order to prevent confusion about arranged marriages being the same as forced marriages. Arranged marriages should be encouraged.

The government shouldn't peddle the idea that arranged marriages are in any way superior to a conventional marriage.

[Geneviev]

Here's a better idea than a lottery system that won't sound like the plot of a generic dystopian novel:

People may apply to have the government assign them a partner, who they can reject if they would like to. People will also be taught that arranged marriages are a good thing in order to prevent confusion about arranged marriages being the same as forced marriages. Arranged marriages should be encouraged.

The government shouldn't peddle the idea that arranged marriages are in any way superior to a conventional marriage.

Why? They are, firstly, and secondly, it would make society more accepting of arranged marriages.

[Sahansahiye Iran]

I only have experience with successful arranged marriages.

Perhaps, but less so.

I don't think I've ever met anyone in an arranged marriage.

I have. To counter Geneviev's worthless anecdotes, I'll introduce my own: I've known 4 arranged couples. 3 ended in divorce. One of the guys got remarried and then divorced all over again. Even the last couple was absolutely miserable but wouldn't divorce.

[Sahansahiye Iran]

The government shouldn't peddle the idea that arranged marriages are in any way superior to a conventional marriage.

Why? They are, firstly, and secondly, it would make society more accepting of arranged marriages.

Then teach them that they aren't bad. Not that they are superior to regular marriages. Because they most definitely aren't always.

[Geneviev]

I don't think I've ever met anyone in an arranged marriage.

I have. To counter Geneviev's worthless anecdotes, I'll introduce my own: I've known 4 arranged couples. 3 ended in divorce. One of the guys got remarried and then divorced all over again. Even the last couple was absolutely miserable but wouldn't divorce.

Arranged marriages have a 6% divorce rate.

[Sahansahiye Iran]

I have. To counter Geneviev's worthless anecdotes, I'll introduce my own: I've known 4 arranged couples. 3 ended in divorce. One of the guys got remarried and then divorced all over again. Even the last couple was absolutely miserable but wouldn't divorce.

Arranged marriages have a 6% divorce rate.

Because the majority of arranged marriages take place in countries like India and China where traditional and religious values usually discourage divorce. That skews the percentage.